Keni
Phantogram Three
Sweet Seals For You, Always
Mike Driver
Cookie Run:Kingdom Official!
One Nice Bug Per Day
EXPECTATIONS
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RMH
occasionally subtle
Sade Olutola
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PR's Tumblrdome
Color Me Curious
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Discoholic 🪩
Cosmic Funnies
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YOU ARE THE REASON
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@greeks-vs-geeks
Shout out to the dude in my class who asked me what my sexuality is, and when I told him I'm ace and explained what that was he was like "You're purely for the cash, that's hard as fuck I respect that" that's such a funny response imo
brooding men who cannot communicate their feelings if their life depended on it are only hot when they're fictional. if i have to deal with one in real life i will curse him and pray for his downfall every night before i go to bed
It's because the writer communicates their feelings for them. If people wanna pull that off in real life they need to hire a guy to walk around behind them narrating.
#can i be the guy#ill narrate SO incorrectly#theyll all learn how to talk for themselves just to shut me up (via @cirrus-grey)
i'm loving the implication that this isn't something they hired you for, but something you'd do as some sort of public service.
if you want me to consume a new media you MUST catch me at the exact moment when the stars are aligned and the air pressure is equal to the current degree of the sun’s peak against the horizon and all the cosmic energies are perfectly unified (aka my old interest is fading out) or i will nod and say “im adding that to my list!” Knowing theres no chance i will check it out
“unless its a book!” “unless you tell me it has gay people in it!” “this but only for live action shows” “theres a good chance i’ll get to it eventually” no wrong this post is not for you this post is ONLY for bitches who could have a treasured friend recommend them something that sounds grown in a lab to be your personal catnip and, with no choice in the matter, immediately know it will never be the right time to watch/read/listen to it
I think I just found the only reasonable exchange involving two people with opposing views on porn to ever exist on this website
actually so based
Confession!
giving birth sucks tbh. not only do you and the baby you’re birthing almost die, usually you shit yourself and often you tear your taint. then you have to push an organ out of your body (placenta) and if even a little of that remains in your body, you can hemorrhage to death or develop an infection that essentially rots your body from the inside out. even if you had a relatively “easy birth”, you bleed for weeks on end. even after that stops, your body and brain is changed for the rest of your life, the pregnancy leeched minerals from your bones, that can cause osteoporosis later. minor urinary incontinence is not uncommon, brain scans of people who gave birth show permanent changes in their brain, you’re never quite the same.
I say all of this not to say giving birth is disgusting but it is a harrowing and visceral experience. society downplays how fucking awful it is and makes it out to be a ~magical~ experience but it isn’t a magical transformative experience for everyone. it can be an extremely traumatic experience for someone who wanted to carry a pregnancy to term, much more so for someone who did not want to be pregnant in the first place or someone who knows their baby won’t survive the birth. anyway, abortion is a right. pregnancy and birth aren’t just inconvenient, it’s fucking awful.
How is it that in this entire post you didn’t say the word “woman” once? Only one sex gives birth. Only women have these experiences, only women are at risk for everything mentioned here, women are the only people this applies to. Erasing the word enables the problem.
I’m an evil trans man with a big fat pussy and it’s my life’s purpose to erase women by using inclusive language. Everyone I make a post a random woman disappears off the planet. Clean vanishes. They’re renaming all maternity wards labor & delivery wards because of me. The word breastfeeding no longer exists in the dictionary. It’s all chestfeeding now. Many world powers are trying to stop me. They can’t. They’re too slow. I’m always two steps ahead.
id: a tweet from pop tingz. "max announces the release of the 'luigi mangione: the ceo killer' documentary on february 17th."
hey! just a reminder this alleged "ceo killer" hasn't been convicted of anything, hasn't even gone to trial, was taken into custody without being dna tested or fingerprinted (what fingerprints they did find near the scene were entirely circumstantial), didn't have any contact with legal rep before his extradition hearing, and wasn't identified as a facial match by the fbi's top notch ai software. just don't watch this doc, it's bound to be full of bullshit just like tmz.
Someone throw the no hate watching meme on here.
Sometimes I love the internet, actually. Incomprehensibly huge place but also so small. Saw a video on Instagram where Crayola was announcing they’re coming out with a box with some limited edition previously retired colors, including Dandelion. This video had hundreds of comments and almost all of them where “omg where’s the dandelion crayon girl she’s going to be so happy” and it was such an unimportant thing, but it was just cute
The tags on this post are also full of people happy for the dandelion crayon girl 🥹
Update!! Dandelion crayon girl got her promo box!!
that ‘beep beep richie’ thing they did in the It books whenever richie was being a jackass but its the batfam members reminding jason to take a breath and not lazarus-rage anybody into the grave and instead of ‘beep beep jason’ it’s just them flashing a green flashlight at his face.
it started out as a joke, just a quick flash of green to remind him that his anger was most likely down to pit rage and not actual annoyance, but at this point jason’s kinda pavloved himself into pausing and calming down at the sight of bright green lights.
*at a league meeting*
Jason, getting visibly agitated at Clark and reaching for the kryptonite: there is no goddamn FUCKING reason for me to leave my guns at the cave you arrogant fucking-
Tim from across the room: *flashes him in the eyes with the flashlight*
Jason:
Clark, slightly nervous:
Jason: *blinks rapidly* *grumbles angrily as he puts the kryptonite down and storms out the room*
Clark: where is he… going?
Tim: to put his head between his knees until he calms down. he’ll be back in a minute we can carry on.
the league:
-
*lantern visiting the cave for Bruce’s help with something*
Bruce: i can get the results back to you in-
Jason, angrily appearing to storm towards the manor: -gonna KILL that demon brat- thinks he can take MY SWORDS? from MY SAFEHOUSE?
Lantern: uhhh-
Bruce, sighing: Dick, do you have the-?
Dick, bringing out a green penlight and going after him: yeah, i got it. really gotta make Damian stop doing that though.
-
*during a team up, hatching out a battle plan*
Damian, interrupting Bruce’s plan with a whisper: Father, may i borrow the lazarus light?
Bruce: why? Hood isn’t arguing with anyone
Damian: he has been glaring at Green Arrow for the past fifteen minutes, and his fingers are starting to twitch.
Wonder Woman: what did Arrow do?
Damian: nothing, Hood just isn’t a fan.
Bruce:
Bruce, sighing: just a quick flash to keep him on subject, i can’t have him blinded right now.
-
*on an undercover mission*
Roy, cracking his knuckles: aren’t you pumped up to take this guy down?
Jason, stood in the middle of a rave, fluorescent green lights have been flashing in his face for the past ten minutes, his arms are hanging limply at his sides: ………huh?
Dick: yeah i don’t think he’ll be much help on this one.
Roy: ?
Dick: he’s basically catatonic
Jason: i’ve never been more calm.
Roy: you’re wearing a crop top and booty shorts
Jason: i kinda feel like a nap
Listen, I'm having fun playing with the ultra patriotic voice, but after a couple years in blue-collar landscaping jobs, you really do need to phrase things like that.
"I'm pretty sure that fella ain't here legally."
"Well, that ain't your business Chip, it's his."
They hate being preached to. If you pull out words like 'gender wage gap' they'll tell you you're brainwashed by the far left media.
"He's one of them transgenders."
"He got freedoms too, Jimmy."
Also, please understand that SO often the real issue these people have is that they just want to say something inappropriate. They don't like being told they can't say "fag", so they'd say it for a reaction, just like a teenager would.
Shut down the conversation without reacting.
"His dick, not mine" will get you much further to shutting that guy down than "well it's really inappropriate to call someone a slur while I'm the job site".
And that's the point. To shut them up. To make them quit saying shit like that. The first one makes him seem kinda weird for caring about what that guy does with his dick. The second one gives him something to fight against and make a big deal about.
code-switching matters for communicating across cultures of all varieties
Mainly because I’m Batman.
that’s a lie i would rather die than lose my kids
what if Damian wasn’t sent to Bruce by Talia and instead decided to do a bit of early child-rebellion by running away to him himself. Talia, pissed off but too busy dealing with uprisings in the league to go track him down herself, calls up the person Damian is most likely to listen to other than her; his brother, who she trusts to keep him safe.
the thing is, Jason is 1: busy with his own missions atm 2: was also once a rebellious little asshole who liked to run away from home. he was Damian’s tutor once, he knows the kid can handle himself and he also knows if he CAN’T handle something he’ll contact Jason for help. he knows this because about a week before Talia called him, Damian called him.
Jason, phone balanced between his ear and shoulder: what do you want, i’m undercover
Damian: i require money for a fake passport.
Jason:
Jason, letting go of the guy he was beating up: alright you have my attention.
Damian: i am running away from home. i wish to do something ‘for the lore’ like the stories you used to tell me as a child.
Jason:
Jason ‘i’m going to ethiopia’ Todd: there’s some stuff in the fake panel under my bed. don’t tell me where you’re going, i don’t want to be complicit when Talia calls. also don’t die, because if you do i’m gonna make you eat dirt once you get out of the pit.
Damian: understood. if i am about to die, i shall call again.
Jason: have fun kiddo.
so Jason tells Talia he’ll ‘keep an eye out for any leads’ and then goes back to his normal business. league missions, his own missions, some outlaw shit, and eventually he ends up crime lording it up in Gotham. he’s a little confused when Tim Drake is seen swinging around as Red Robin rather than just Robin, but he got over his obsession with the Robin shit a while ago, so he ignores it.
until he runs into Batman and Robin. and there isn’t a mask in the fucking world that could hide his kid brother’s face from him.
Red Hood:
Robin:
Red Hood:
Robin:
Batman: why are you two staring at each other like that. what’s happening.
Robin:
Red Hood: *deep sigh*
Robin: are you going to tell mother-
Red Hood: -when you said ‘like the stories i used to tell you’.
Robin: *looks at the floor*
Red Hood: i did NOT think you meant running to a different country to find your birth parent. you fucking COPIER.
Robin:
Robin: …but you made being Robin sound so cool…
Batman: what the fuck are you two talking about?
Red Hood, pointing: you stay out of this, this is family business.
Batman: ????
what fucking hell dimension are y’all blogging from
biting your forehead friday
Actually that's very affectionate and careful grooming. Wolves and other carnivores use their incisor teeth to nibble out tangles and scratch itches in their fur. Doing so for someone else, especially on their very sensitive face, shows a highly intimate level of trust. These two are likely a mated pair, or possibly parent and child.
If you have a cat, you've probably had this happen to you. If they lick and then bite your arm, they're trying to groom you. Trouble is, we humans don't have fur, and those teeth are sharp!
One of my favorite tiktok niches that was created by people so bored they’re barely alive is that there’s a whole diet soda community where they believe everything you do greatly effects the way diet soda tastes and there are very specific methods of serving it to make sure you get the right flavor as if it’s an expensive steak or something. but the best part is they believe how long you leave it in the fridge is the most important part in all of it, which they call, “marinating”
i checked this out because i found it almost impossible to believe but its true at least for this one lady
diet cola fan here. our world contains multitudes you cannot fathom
The revolution ‘bout to be televised, you picked the right time but the wrong guy.
The balls for Kendrick to utter this in front of him along with dissing Drake? Cinema? No, modern protest that’s recapturing decades of protest culture within music, specifically black music. Major props to Kendrick and I hope more are to follow
