"I Need To Know That I'm Not Alone.”

[gryffindor-quidditch]

If the tide takes California, I’m so glad I got to hold you.

AN: So I’ve been listening to “Till forever falls apart” by Ashe and FINNEAS for the past two days and I needed to write something based on it. go listen to the song because I love it and i wanna hear what others think!!!!

Oct 31, 1981

The sky over Godric’s Hollow was an inky black, with thick clouds rolling overhead. Despite the horrors that had happened not long before, the small town was comfortably quiet, the sound of Hagrid riding away on his motorcycle having faded away into nothingness. Sirius felt a pang of guilt as he thought of Harry, as his godfather he should have stayed with him, should’ve made sure he was somewhere safe. There were more important things to do right now, though. 

His footsteps echoed of the pavement as he walked away from the ruin that was once James and Lily’s home. Sirius Black, usually lead by emotion, who never gave his plans a second thought before jumping in, was completely composed. Calm. Perhaps you could say this was the calm before the storm, but Sirius knew what he was doing, and he knew it was right. That’s not to say he wasn’t feeling anything at this particular moment, because oh god was he feeling everything right now. But, unlike when he let his anger and his pain take control of his actions as a kid, now his grief and heartbreak and unbridled rage bubbled under the surface, not yet taking control. 

He thought of Remus as he walked towards Peter’s flat. He was out on a mission, had been for 2 weeks now, there was no way he could have known what had happened, or what was going to happen. Sirius felt such a sense of longing when he pictured his boyfriend that it was almost enough to turn around right then and let the aurors handle this. Almost. 

“Out on our own, dreaming in a world that we both know is out of our control.”

Sirius thought about how naive they had been to believe all of them would see the other side of this war. Now it seemed only one Marauder would survive it. He didn’t want to die, but he felt certain that as long as Peter didn’t survive either, all would be well. He hoped that maybe Peter would go without a fight, he knew this was unlikely. 

“But if shit hits the fan, we’re not alone”

He started to dread every step he took. Every step closer to Peter meant another step farther away from his future with Moony, from his future where they raised Harry, and everything was okay. Remus was going to think this was his fault, Sirius realized with a jolt. How had he been so stupid as to mistrust Remus? Remus, who held him and took care of him when he had missions go wrong. Remus, who kept his secrets and never judged him. Remus, who had forgiven him for every stupid thing he’d ever done. Sirius knew he didn’t deserve forgiveness for believing he was the traitor. 

“Cause you’ve got me and you know, that I’ve got you and I know”

Peters flat came into view, and Sirius knew that the only way anyone would believe his innocence was if he could get Peter to the ministry to admit the truth. 

As he drew closer to the building, he caught sight of Peter slipping out the side door with a duffel bag in hand. His heart leapt in his chest, relieved to have found his target. In the moment, it doesn’t seem odd to have found Peter so easily, it doesn’t seem planned. Sirius quickened his pace, drawing his wand as he followed Peter down an alleyway. 

Peter walked purposefully, but Sirius caught up to him easily. They had just reached the other side of the alley, which opened up into a busy road when Sirius grabbed Peter by the shoulder and forcibly turned him around. When Peter met his gaze, his expression was not one of fear, like Sirius had been expecting. Nor was it one of regret. 

Peter looked pleased, smug even. 

It was only half a second, a smirk, and an aura of confidence coming from someone who normally reeked of fear and cowardice. This is when Sirius realized he has made a grave mistake. Suddenly Peters demeanor changes, he takes a step back, away from Sirius. 

“You killed James and Lily Potter!” He screeched, the busy street all but came to a halt. 

“If the tide takes California, I’m so glad I got to hold you”

Sirius knew this is not ending in his favor, he’d been played. He knew he will not see Remus again. And as Peter causes a scene on the street, yelling and pointing at Sirius, making accusations that couldn’t be farther from the truth, but that will be believed by everyone in the wizarding world by tomorrow, Sirius thought of Remus. 

He thinks of them at home, in bed, Remus’s gangly long limbs cradling Sirius as they sleep. The smell of cigarette ash, and chocolate. The heat of his body, like a furnace, keeping the cold air from the window at bay. He thinks of kissing his scarred flesh until his blonde eyelashes flicker open in the mornings. Why hadn’t he been more grateful for the time they’d had together.

“And if the sky falls from heaven above, I know I had the best time falling into love”

His world turned into red ash, Peter has fled, leaving only destruction, dead bodies, and a finger in his wake. Sirius finally broke. His laughter poured out of him, echoed through the street.

“We’ve been living on a fault line, and for a while you were all mine”

It had only been a matter of time until things all blew up, he had already known this. The war had been getting worse and worse each day, the Order had been getting progressively smaller. Sirius should’ve known it would be his life that fell apart in the end, thats just how it went for him. He should’ve known from the first day of this war that things would not end in his favor.

Things between him and Remus had been bad for months. Months of distrust, of resentment. He knew after tonight, Remus would never be able to believe that what they had was real. He would believe it was all a lie, just to get close to all of them so he could stab them all in the back. But his relationships with Remus and with James were probably the only things in his life that hadn’t been lies.

“I’d spend a lifetime giving you my heart”

As the aurors stun him and tie him up, Sirius only wishes they had had more time. He longs for Remus and James.

“I swear that I’ll be yours forever till forever falls apart”

His thoughts of Remus are the last happy thoughts he has for 12 years.

“Till forever falls apart”

[incorrecthpjo]

Sirius: C'mon, how many times do I have to apologize?

Remus: ONCE!

Sirius:

Remus:

Sirius: No.

[joons]

albus severus potter, you were named after two men who taught me how difficult it is to distinguish between good and evil, because every human being has the capacity for both inside themselves. i spent my life idolizing one and vilifying the other, but it wasn’t until i was older that i realized the enormity of the choices they were forced to make and the guilt and regret they carried with them their whole lives. they were both like me, ambitious and stubborn and lost, but they devoted their whole lives to protecting me, and i’ll forever be grateful for that. without them, you would never have been born, and if there’s one thing i want you to remember, it’s that you are always capable of selflessness and bravery, even when it seems impossible, because they were. they were not perfect people, but they were stronger than i ever knew, and they taught me that the choices you make, however small, however misguided, matter. they matter after you’re gone. they matter to the world you want to change, and making the right choice after you’ve made the wrong one, hard as it is, is how we grow. so remember that. be brave, albus severus. you don’t have to be a gryffindor to know what that means.

[justshoveabezoar]

Everyone posting these “happy 1st day of school Hogwarts”, but no one is talking about how damn early these kids are returning to school!

[gryffindor-quidditch]

Omg! What I’ve been back at school for 3 weeks now!! When does school start where u live?

[two-gay-marauders-blog]

Remus: That’s ridiculous, Sirius doesn’t have a crush on me.

James: Yes he does.

Peter: Yes he does.

Lily: Yes he does.

Sirius: Yes I do.

[peaceofseoul]

When in doubt, go to the library!

[moonysfrexckles]

This is STUNNING

[gryffindor-quidditch]

OH MY GOD IM IN LOVE

[fanonical]

if harry potter was real someone would be growing weed in the room of requirement

[canyoudancelikeahufflepuff]

dumbledore

[smolbus]

The Potter kids ❤

[lyalllupin]

look, the only marauder era character with big dick energy is lily evans and that’s that on that.

[hogwartsaheadcanon]

Marlene Fucking McKinnon erasure how dare xD

[gryffindor-quidditch]

Super quick sketch of Harry and Ladon from @aeternumregina ‘s Leo Inter Serpentes!

[batmansymbol]

one of the most important things to me about harry potter is its portrayal of happiness. in the harry potter world, happiness isn’t just a feeling—it’s a weapon. look at how harry and his friends fight: with riddikulus, laughter stymies a creature made of fear; with expecto patronum, the very memory of happiness beats back the grim forces of depression.

the weaponization of positivity stretches beyond that. fred and george weasley’s inventions, meant for laughter, turn into arms against umbridge’s regime. and after their departure from hogwarts, their joke shop becomes not only the single bright spot in diagon alley (literally & figuratively) but a hub of defensive magic. the whole weasleys’ wizard wheezes narrative serves as maybe the clearest example in the series that happiness can act as both shield and sword.

there is something deeply empowering in a depiction of happiness as something so tangible and usable. as a profoundly depressed person, i often feel myself scrounging for happy memories and clutching them close; i find myself grasping for laughter in the dark. the physicalization of expecto patronum is not a quantum leap from reality. the boggart’s laughter as combat fuel, the weasleys’ levity as not just a choice but a difficult and defiant one—it’s all familiar.

the series has its share of darkness, but it revels most in the light. it lets us believe that the act of joy is not small, trivial, or inconsequential. happiness is something not just to be lived—it is to be wielded, on your own behalf and the behalves of the people around you, to battle against the world’s heavier elements. harry potter teaches us this.

[gryffindor-quidditch]

It’s harder than I thought to tell the truth

Ok I decided to write a thing… lmk if i should make a part 2 to this! Also shoutout to @captofthesswolfstar for motivating me to write this. Enjoy!

Sometimes, on particularly nice days, Sirius liked to go out in his animagus form and get some fresh air. There was something about being a dog that made being outside a billion times more enjoyable. That was what he’d been doing on this particular Sunday. He’d decided to go to the park, perhaps get a friendly stranger to throw a stick or maybe even a nice tennis ball.

The park was surprisingly empty for such a beautiful day, most were probably spending it at the pool, he mused, as he searched for a viable candidate to play fetch with. There were a few kids on the swings and he decided against going near them, kids were just fine as a human but as a dog going near a group of children almost always led to his fur being pulled or having sticky substances in it by the time he left.

He made a beeline for the other side of the park, which, disappointingly was even more deserted than the rest of the park. There was an elderly couple sitting on a bench not too far away but he didn’t want to disrupt their conversation, there were a few people running laps but he supposed they wouldn’t bother stopping to play with him, and ah yes another man, perhaps around his own age, sitting under a large tree, book in his lap. Now we can’t have that, can we? Padfoot padded over to him, not caring that he’d be distracting him from reading, and placed his head in the man’s lap.

“Hi there, boy!” The man said to him, smiling widely and dropping a hand from his book to stroke Padfoot’s head.

Now that he was closer, Sirius could see the scars that lined the man’s face and neck and wondered what, exactly could have done that much damage. He shuddered at the thought, deciding to lick the man’s face to show his sympathies.

The man laughed, a loud, unrestrained laugh that warmed something deep inside the dog. He continued to stroke Padfoot, scratching behind his ears and rubbing his belly until he found himself dozing on the man’s lap as he continued to read his book.

It was quite a while before Sirius remembered why he’d come over in the first place, his head snapping up as he tried to get the man’s attention again. He nipped at his pants, waiting until The man looked up, before running off to find a large stick and returning with it. He dropped it at The man’s feet before looking up at him pleadingly.

“You want me to throw it?” The man asked, marking his place in his book before finally setting it down in the grass. Taking Padfoot’s responding bark as a yes, he threw the stick across the park smiling as the dog galloped after it.

They spent the day like that, only stopping once the sky had begun to grow dark, “I’m sorry, I have to go home now” the man had said, kneeling down to stroke Padfoot one last time before beginning his walk home.

The man had forgotten his book, Sirius realized, and he was already too far away to hear Padfoot’s barks. So, making sure not to get slobber on the pages, Padfoot picked up the book with his teeth before trotting after The man. He followed him all the way home and, stopping outside the door he’d watched The man enter, dropped the book and began barking like a maniac.

After about a minute of endless barking, The man opened the door and Padfoot walked in, the book once again between his teeth.

“Just come on in, why don’t you?” The man muttered not at all displeasedly.

Padfoot dropped the book on the coffee table and then jumped onto The man’s couch and curling up, relishing the coziness of The man’s house.

“Hey, that’s my book.” He muttered picking it up and inspecting the bite marks that now lined the cover, “Did you come all this way just to bring me this?” He asked incredulously, plopping down next to Padfoot and scratching behind his ears again.

That wasn’t the only reason Sirius had decided to follow The man home, but he nodded anyway.

“Well thank you, then,” he paused, looking somewhat uncomfortable, “you didn’t have to do that.” Padfoot huffed, hopefully portraying to The man that he’d wanted to do so.

Sirius was beginning to realize that, perhaps coming here was a bad idea. It wasn’t that he was unhappy or that he disliked The man. No, it was quite the opposite of that actually, it was that he was so happy and he liked The man so much he wasn’t sure he would ever be able to leave.  

That night, Padfoot decided he could afford to sleep at The man’s house. So they curled up in his small bed, Padfoot’s head on The man’s chest and The man’s arms wrapped around his neck. This, Sirius decided as he began to doze, was what it felt like to be truly happy.

The next morning, Sirius was awoken to the sound of the shower turning on somewhere in the distance. He got up, trotted back into the living room and cozied up on the couch, waiting for The man to be done in the shower so he could pet him once more.

Ten minutes later, The man walked out of the bathroom in shabby robes. So he was a wizard, Sirius mused, he wouldn’t have suspected as much given the amount of electrical appliances he kept in his home.

“I’ve got to go to work now,” He said sitting down next to Padfoot and sliding on his shoes, “I can let you out, if you’d prefer to spend your day outside.” Padfoot didn’t move, “Or you can stay here,” The man said, a lopsided grin on his face. Padfoot barked “Well it’s decided then,” The man chuckled, giving him one last pat before departing through the floo.

“MInistry of magic!” He yelled, spinning in the green flames before disappearing from view.

After The man was gone, Sirius turned back into his human form deciding to do some investigating. He learned The man’s name was Remus Lupin from a pile of his mail, he recognized that name from somewhere. The rest of the day was spent raiding The ma- Remus’s fridge, making sure not to make it obvious there was food missing, and skimming through some of his books.

He changed back into Padfoot when the floo once again roared to life and waited on the couch for Remus. Remus collapsed onto the couch with a sigh, resting his head in his hands as he swore under his breath. Gone was the smiley, chipper person Sirius had been spending his time with. There was no doubt that something was wrong, and it was of the utmost importance that Padfoot made him feel better. The dog whined quietly nudging The m- Remus’s arm with his nose. Remus dropped his arm and now Sirius could see the tears streaming his face, who did this to him, Padfoot thought angrily. He found himself growling inadvertently at the thought of someone hurting this kind, caring person.

“It’s ok” Remus said trying to sooth the dog, his own problems momentarily forgotten, “It’s just, just- fuck-” He ran a hand through his hair attempting to regain his equilibrium, “I just lost my job.” He choked out, reaching out to stroke the dog allowing the soft fur against his fingers sooth him.

After a while of sitting like that Padfoot whined again to get Remus’s attention and then tilted his head to the side, silently asking why he’d been fired. “I should have expected it really,” he said warily, “Most of my jobs never last longer than a few months. I guess I can’t help but get my hopes up.” He sighed again, looking to the floor, “I’m a werewolf, you see.” He looked back up at Padfoot as if he thought this information would send the dog running for the hills, “Every time one of my bosses figures it out I’m fired within days.” By this point Padfoot was curled up in Remus’s lap, hoping to be helping him.

They sit there for the remainder of the night, Remus at one point had calmed down enough to keep reading his book from the other day. He would have looked, to most people, that he was perfectly fine now that he’d calmed from his outburst but Sirius could tell he was still shaken. He’d been on the same page for minutes and was at this point just staring at the wall, not even attempting to read. Sirius couldn’t help but be worried for Remus.

Sirius stayed at Remus’s house for a week, comforting him when necessary and listening to him rant on an hourly basis. Each day he’d tell himself that was the day he was going to leave and each day he couldn’t bring himself to leave Remus alone. It was sunday when Remus finally had to depart from his house to go grocery shopping.

Once he was sure that Remus was gone Sirius turned into his human form once more, rummaging through Remus’s things to find a piece of parchment and a quill. Yes, he had to leave but he wasn’t going to do so without saying goodbye or an explanation. He wrote his piece and placed the letter on the kitchen counter, looking around the house one last time before departing. Guilt wracked him as he closed the door behind him and hoped he would see Remus Lupin again.

Remus returned to the house not even an hour later, he walked into the kitchen to begin putting the groceries away when he saw the note. He picked it up and read through it, only realizing then that his furry companion was missing.

Remus,

My name is Sirius Black, and I am so sorry. I have been living in your house as my animagus form, Padfoot, for the past week. I wanted to tell you the truth once I’d found out you were a wizard, I really did, but I didn’t think you’d take it well if your new dog suddenly turned into a person and I really didn’t want to be kicked out. I’m sorry you lost your job and I’m sorry the ministry is making it difficult for you to get another one, the whole lot of them are wankers I swear. If you ever need someone to talk to, I’ve really enjoyed getting to know you and would be happy to lend an ear or a shoulder to lean on. You can floo me at Number 12 Grimmauld Place, please keep in touch. Please.

Sincerely,

Your ex dog

[gryffindor-quidditch]

Been talking ‘bout the way things change...

May 16, 1979 was the day Euphemia Potter passed due to a horrible case of dragon pox

Euphemia was a widely-loved woman, so naturally a lot of people took the news hard

Arguably, Sirius Black took it the worst

He hadn’t even been told she was ill, nobody suspected it was anything serious and it wasn’t, until suddenly it was, and there was no time to inform the family

He found out by owl, something he is upset about for weeks

“You could have stopped by, James! She was my mum too!”

The letter however, was enough to reduce him to sobs within his first read of it

And of course he had to read through it multiple times just to be sure he hadn’t misinterpreted James’s illegible handwriting

He tried not to let himself feel the loss, tried to push it away so he wouldn’t have to face the fact that the woman who had saved his life just a few years earlier was truly gone

It’s half a pack of cigarettes and a bottle of fire-whiskey later that Remus finds him

He sits there, watching as Remus pries the letter from his fingers, but not really watching because next thing he knows there’s a Remus curled around him rubbing soothing circles into his back

It’s then, that the news finally sinks in,

He’s never going to see her again

and he cannot even imagine a world without their weekly lunches, or her treacle tart, or her smile that made everyday better, or her hugs that warmed him to the core

He cannot imagine his life without her

and if he thought he was crying a lot before, this realization brings on a whole new type of crying

he’s straight up wailing in Remus’s arms and he’s not sure if the tears will ever stop

he didn’t think they would, and if he was being perfectly honest that didn’t bother him at all

How was he supposed to be happy in a world without her, after all?

Eventually, Remus must’ve thought enough was enough because some time later he’s pulled out of his stupor by two hands grabbing his shoulders and finally forcing him to look at the other boy

Remus looked like hell, but he supposed he probably looked even worse so he didn’t say anything

two thumbs wiped his cheeks free of tears, though they were replaced by new ones within seconds 

once they’d sat like that long enough for Sirius to get his breathing under control, Remus started speaking

his voice was weak, and whispered as he struggled to convince Sirius that things were going to be alright 

perhaps they wouldn’t be anytime soon 

“but they’ll get there Pads, I swear to you eventually things will be ok again.”

It must’ve been hours later that Sirius finally nodded, sagging against him 

He wasn’t totally convinced, honestly but after hours of Remus’s words soothing him back into sanity he was hopeful for this future where “things were ok”

Little did he know that within days the same disease that had just taken his mother from him would also take his father

within weeks he would go head to head against a group of Death Eaters only to find out his brother was amongst them

within months his two best friends would find out they’re expecting, only to be forced into hiding shortly later 

Little did he know that as he mourned, the man who he’d considered one of his closest friends was switching sides to become a spy for Voldemort

that by the time his godson turned one, his first girlfriend and her whole family would have been murdered 

Little did he know that within the next year him and his soulmate would grow further and further apart before eventually breaking up, the wedding band that he’d kept in his back pocket for months, waiting for the “right time”, forgotten

Little did he know that in just 2 years and 168 days the war would be over, but only after the reveal of Peter’s betrayal, the murder of both James and Lily Potter and his own arrest.

Little did he know that a world where things were ok would never again be a reality for him

[roonilwazliv-deactivated2018032]

[livs-cooke]

Harry Potter rolled over inside his blankets without waking up. One small hand closed on the letter beside him and he slept on, not knowing he was special, not knowing he was famous, not knowing he would be woken in a few hours’ time by Mrs. Dursley’s scream as she opened the front door to put out the milk bottles, nor that he would spend the next few weeks being prodded and pinched by his cousin Dudley… He couldn’t know that at this very moment, people meeting in secret all over the country were holding up their glasses and saying in hushed voices: “To Harry Potter - the boy who lived!”

Happy Birthday, Harry James Potter! (July 31, 1980)

[thechamberofsecrets]

has been opened

[enemiesofthe-heir]

shit

[professorgilderoy-lockhart]

don’t worry i’ve got this

[harry-ron-andhermione-blog]

no fuck you 

[gi-nnyweasley]

can someone help me rn

[woahdenkirk-blog]

HISS HISS MOTHERFUCKERS

[peregrintook]

“If only he had died like Hedwig, so quickly he would not have known it happened. Or if he could have launched himself in front of a wand to save someone he loved… He envied even his parents’ deaths now. This cold-blooded walk to his own destruction would require a different kind of bravery.”