Joker’s smile was always a bit off, as one would expect from a psychopathic serial killer. His laughter was the stuff of nightmares for every single defender of Gotham. Hell, he was expanding the collection with this newest kidnapping.
He’d had his goons snag the blue eyed, black haired brat who had spotted the kryptonite at the museum and taken a large step back. Really, could the kid have been more obviously a Superbrat?
He was videotaping this for posterity, he decided as his sick grin continued to grow more sinister.
“Wakey wakey, little bluebird,” he crooned off camera, poking at the lad with his crowbar.
“Ol’ Lexus lost this pretty green rock to me in a card game and I thought I would show you.”
The kid’s eyes opened, looking around in confusion before landing on the Joker.
Joker let out a cackled exclamation of “That’s more like it!” Before turning his back on the boy to speak into the camera.
“Hello, boys and girls! I would just LOVE to introduce you to my guest, but I feel like he’s just the show opener. I’m putting a greeting out there and inviting Superman to come visit us while we’re taping. I just know it would KILL his kiddo over here not to meet such a hero. And Batsy? Stay out of it and keep your brats away or he’ll be eating a shiny green bullet.”
A little bit of squirming behind him suggested the young man was trying to break through the ropes.
“You’re not getting through that lovely twine, me boyo. I soaked it in a kryptonite bath. Honestly I would think you’d be whimpering in pain, but you might be feeling a little too lightheaded. Still, please at least ATTEMPT to put on a show. I’d hate for you to get canceled early.” He let out his maniacal hoots of laughter.
When no sound came, he made a big production of getting a better grip on his crowbar. “Alright, kid. I tried to give you a little advice, one old pro to a new kid. Let’s see you put it into play,” Joker spun to face his captive, only to pause in confusion as he spotted the empty chair.
“No way the Guano crew was so fast. ExCUSE ME!” He shouted to a nearby henchman, “Did you forget my Very Important Note about soaking the ropes?” In annoyance, he shot the henchman, grumbling. “Just can’t get good help around here. Oh well, I guess it’s true what they say: if you want a job done right, better do it yourself.”
He turned to face the camera really quickly and held up his finger in the “one moment please” gesture. “We’re experiencing some technical difficulties. As in, technically my hostage is trying to escape; bad form, really.”
Unnoticed by him, a boy stood on the ceiling, black hair floating around like he was underwater and eyes shifting from icy blue to toxic green as an unholy grin shown down.
A voice, disembodied and creepy, came simultaneously from all corners of the warehouse.
“Oh Joker, you should have picked up that call about extending your warranty and insurance. Oh well, hindsight’s 20/20.” The voice was underscored by the mocking whispers of the voices of Joker’s victims. Too many to single out anyone, just as there were suddenly too many shadows filling the building.
A staticky sound filled the room, and when the camera settled down, Joker spun and saw the boy standing in the middle of the room, looking completely innocent.
“Oh THERE you are. I was just going to show you the neat Little Rock I got from Ol’ Sexy Lexy. Think fast,” he smirked and tossed the rock like he would a set of car keys. He clearly expected it to make the boy scream and collapse weakly.
Instead, the boy’s eyes lit up, seeming to be filled with an inner fire. “Don’t mind if I do,” he cheered… before biting into the toxic stone like it was a candy bar.
“Oh come ON!” Joker whined in protest, “why can’t I have One Good Thing in my life! If nothin’ else, that canNOT be good for your teeth.”
“My teeth are the least of your worries, Joker. I have been asked to tell you; you should feel flattered. Death sent the Ghost King to personally escort you to your trial.”
With those words, the shadowed room suddenly became jet black and Joker let out an ungodly shriek when he saw the eyes still glowing in the pitch black room like they belonged the Cheshire Cat.
“I thought I was crazy, but you’re certifiable!” Came Joker’s terrified whimper.
An evil smile could be heard in the last voice of warning. “But Joker, didn’t you know? We’re all mad here!”
Then the glowing eyes were extinguished like someone had turned off a flashlight.
When the lights flickered back on a moment later, Joker was dead on the floor. The coroner later declared it cardiac arrest, but everyone who saw the video (and you better believe it went viral on YouTube) knew exactly why his heart had stopped.
