Cole’s kingdom!

He/His, Kinda a Dumb bitch, open to ranting

[yogg-saron]

my little brother came into my room and told me that there was water all over the bathroom floor so i got up and grabbed a towel and ran into the bathroom to find all of my water energy pokemon cards sprawled out on the floor this kid is 5 fucking years old and he got me

[yogg-saron]

do you think this is a fucking game (because he does)

[yogg-saron]

THIS POST IS TWO YEARS OLD NOW. MAX IS 7. IT DIES DOWN FOR LIKE HALF A YEAR AND THEN SUDDENLY IT KICKS BACK UP AGAIN I HATE THIS POST 

[wizardshark]

this post is now 5 years old. Max is 10 and i hope he’s still schemin’

[explorerrowan]

There’s so much potential in this genre of joke. “There’s a fire in the kitchen!” etc.

[yogg-saron]

#max is thirteen now :(

i find it so genuinely hilarious that my little brothers age is measurable on tumblr specifically by people who have seen this post. i moved out a while ago but i know that he would love how often his dorky ass joke gets passed around on here. thank you all very much.

[derinthescarletpescatarian]

Max is an adult now

[indiedrone]

but mom how will other people know that you, a white Texan, are a Christian

[fullblownpanic-deactivated20141]

same

[paroxetini]

Jesus

[ahs-delrey]

I bet those two are couple now..

[fullblownpanic-deactivated20141]

I’m gay

[indiedrone]

me too

[kateordie]

This is such a great story

[indiedrone]

update from Houston pride 2019! we’re friends

[thesubcon10ent]

Some fool: Avengers Infinity War was the most ambitious crossover event in history!

Tumblr users indiedrone and fullblownpanic: oh really? Watch this

[guiltyidealist]

@hellsite-hall-of-fame

[bigandlong]

If you see this on your dashboard, reblog this, NO MATTER WHAT and all your dreams and wishes will come true.

[jae-felidae]

Oh hey! Haven’t seen this in forever! Didn’t reblog it when it came across me before, not gonna skip it this time, I need some good vibes.

[so-much-for-subtlety]

[lesbian-moon-gf]

Girl you are an obligate carnivore

[humedetector]

but her appel

[ratslain]

@kittybroker

[kittybroker]

Idiot apple girl now crunching down for only $11.91!

[goofballproximitysurveyor-deact]

when people put "trigger warning" on their content without specifying what the trigger warning is for

[ohtehnoeszombies]

this post contains notes

[zeesqueere]

does it?

does it though?

[pileofknives]

Fuck is going on here

[liina-puff]

post expired

[actionpainting-deactivated20231]

my nephews lunch that he packed

[rnelodyy]

[ID: A lunchbox containing a handful of loose lettuce and a half-empty bottle of Pepsi.]

[puppygirllaika]

that's arugula

[ceo-of-lesbians]

[ID: A lunchbox containing a handful of loose lettuce and a half-empty bottle of arugula]

[garforarts]

『 Psychopomp 』

Inspired by Souls on the Banks of the Acheron by Adolf Hirémy-Hirschl

[remosdeerica]

DeadSerious prompt #2:

So, Pariah Dark wakes up. He and Danny fight. Danny wins, becomes Ghost King, yadda yadda.

But in this AU Pariah's core gets destroyed because that's the only way Danny can defeat him without a bunch of people dying (angst potential).

Anyway, that means that he was never put back into the sarcophagus of Forever Sleep. So it's just... Hanging around inside the castle that Danny now has.

So one day Danny comes across it, and doesn't know what it is. He thinks it's just a fancy coffin. And since it's a coffin and he's dead, he thinks it would be funny to have a nap in the coffin (He's very tired with all the king stuff plus school).

So he takes a nap in the sarcophagus, and has the best sleep of his unlife. And since it's not locked once he wakes up he just gets out of it.

Needless to say overtime Danny takes a lot of naps in the sarcophagus.

One day it gets summoned by cultists or some rough or whatever. And the Batfam/Justice League/Teen Titins (doesn't matter which as long as Damian is there) are there to try and stop them from waking up the ghost king form his Forever Sleep and dooming the world, cause the think Pariah is still the king.

And in the middle of the fighting the sarcophagus opens not to reveal a scary and powerful tyrant king. But rather to reveal a teenage boy with bed head, space themed pjs and a stuffed rocketship pillow.

Said teenage boy is the most beautiful thing Damian has ever seen. And he becomes even more beautiful when he starts yelling at people for disturbing his nap.

[iguessthisisanewobsession]

Damian: I knew he was the one when he told the head cult leader “eat shit and die.”

[linztheanimelover]

I didn’t draw this by the by but when I refind the og artist I’ll put their name up

[linztheanimelover]

The artist is @3motionally3xhausted

[staff]

we fucked up

[pinacoladamatata]

What did u fuck up?

[pinacoladamatata]

What did u fuck up @staff ?

[ladychlo]

live picture of the fuck up

[junkratsadstuck]

here at the sandwich shop, we’ve started to notice some people who are new to sandwiches aren’t used to meat and cheese between two slices of bread. they find this practice strange and confusing. that’s why we’ve decided to cut the bread out all together. from now on, we’ll just serve slices of meat and cheese on a plate.

[junkratsadstuck]

we know that many of our loyal sandwich shop customers have been coming here for years to buy our delicious sandwiches. but some people don’t “get” sandwiches, and we need to try and appeal to them with an easier-to-understand meal format. we will no longer be serving sandwiches. all of our food will just be cold cuts on a paper plate. we love our customers and appreciate your understanding <3

[derinthescarletpescatarian]

Yes we know Craig's Cold Cuts down the street does cold cuts better than we do and has millions of customers. That's why we need to switch to cold cuts, to get their customers. We hope that our long-time sandwich loving customer base will be patient in this transition to cold cuts and welcome the certain influx of Craig's Cold Cut customers who will surely come here to enjoy our worse cold cuts with you, our sandwich-deprived customer base, whom we value so much.

[derinthescarletpescatarian]

I love how this goes around again every time the tumblr staff does something fucking stupid.

[batsandbirdsandothers]

[dp-is-sogood]

[conversation16]

hey so it’s march now aka the beginning of endometriosis awareness month and i feel obligated to remind you that debilitatingly painful periods are not normal. if you or someone you know is ending up sick or bedridden every month, you are not crazy and deserve medical attention from someone who will take you seriously

[conversation16]

hey it’s march again let’s get this post circulating again

[casasupernovas]

shoutout to my favourite doctor who blooper ever

Doctor: Martha, you trust me don't you?

Martha: Of course I do.

Doctor: Because it all depends on you.

Martha: What does? What am I supposed to do?

David Tennant, breaking character and returning to his natural Scottish accent: Well there's a watch, but I've lost it!

[the-leftover-companion]

Reblogged this on my other account to but fuck I find this so funny.

[grootficguy]

“Every Pokemon is someone’s favourite” I’m making a spreadsheet to see if this is true. Reblog with your favourite Pokemon in the tags.

Here’s the spreadsheet in-progress

[grootficguy]

Ok, mother of GOD that's a lot of responses and I am but one man with Excel. I'll update these ASAP but also some rules:

A Pokemon only counts for itself, not its evolution line.

A Pokemon with multiple forms (like Zygarde) will only be counted for the specified form. A Pokemon with multiple appearances (like Spinda, Vivillon, Sylvally, etc.) count for all their appearances.

I'm literally doing this as a testament to my own depression that not everyone is lovable, so add that to the weight of this post's meaning.

[lunar-pantheon]

i made a grindr and in under 24 hours i got the most insane unsolicited nude to ever exist. hes fully nude on the beach and in his right hand is a black tipped reef shark i could not make this shit up if i tried

[lunar-pantheon]

artistic rendition

i fucking wish i had a way to prove this but a) passing around nudes is wrong even when its a 40 year old nudist shark freak and b) he unsent the messages bc my silence made him nervous ig. wish he was instead nervous about sharks around his panenis but im not his dad

[lunar-pantheon]

btw another pic in the set he sent me was essentially the same photo but the shark was a fishing spear and his penis was erect this time. do you think he meant it as a metaphor thats kind of poignant symbolism

he looked almost regal in a florida man way

[lunar-pantheon]

actually fuck do you guys think i ghosted Poseidon on grindr be honest its hurricane season and im on the gulf i mean did you SEE what that guy did to odysseus

[gravitren]

We all know what erectile dysfunction is but literally no one is ever taught what vaginismus is and it can cause people to feel extremely lost, broken, and cause people to take their own lives. Raise. Awareness.

[pokemonprofessor]

For the uninformed, vaginismus is when the vagina painfully tightens and spasms when faced with pressure, usually from anything trying to insert into the vagina. It’s the reason I can’t wear tampons, and why many people can’t have vaginal sex without severe pain.

There’s not a lot of treatments, and there isn’t a single one that is for vaginismus exclusively - they’re all medications or treatments to treat symptoms, but not the causes. In fact, for a long time doctors waved off vaginismus as a purely psychological disorder in cis women.

Seriously, this is so unaddressed and uncared for in medical circles. Please spread awareness, even if all it’s for is to let those who have it but don’t have a name for it finally be able to understand what’s happening to their bodies.

[certifiedsexed]

Certified Sex Ed Post!

[mystery-ink]

Hi hello! This post is almost 10 years old and there ARE treatments for this. Vaginismus is otherwise known as pelvic hypertonia and it is a MUSCULAR condition that can be caused by many different factors including endometriosis, trauma, chronic UTIs, and connective tissue disorders.

It’s incredibly common! And it can be treated by physiotherapy.

I know this because I’m currently undergoing physio and although it can take months to recover, I’m already seeing improvement. A lot of the pelvic floor exercises are available online, but if you have these symptoms please TALK TO YOUR DOCTOR and see if you can get a physio referral (or investigation for underlying causes like endometriosis).

Also, my additions to posts never get reblogged so a note to my followers: this is SUPER IMPORTANT ISSUE that affects many people and is rarely talked about. Please reblog, and please share this info with as many people as possible.

Pelvic hypertonia/vaginismus is incredibly debilitating and psychologically damaging but it CAN BE TREATED. Spread the word, and you never know who you’ll be throwing a lifeline to.