i am irma vep

not a personal tumblr. you will not get details about my life. may contain triggering and/or disturbing content.

[iaiamothrafhtagn]

so. this is a hard post for me to write, given that this is, i think, the fifth time i've started trying to write it and first time i haven't chickened out halfway through this first sentence where i admit that part.

i'll save you all the time and energy and get what this post is about out of the way, first: i need money, badly. yeah, this is another post where a disabled, brain-damaged trans woman tells you her sob story and asks you for cash to mitigate it. shocking, i know. it's almost like it's hard for women like us to survive under capitalism, or something!

but here's facts: i'm currently jobless. now, normally this would not be the end of my fucking world - i have a patreon that's meant to help cover my basic living expenses and provide something of a cushion, and at least momentarily i have a roommate who's being very understanding about my difficulties covering any portion of the rent. however. that roommate is already looking for new places to live. and i am not the only one in financial dire straits at the moment, and in fact it seems like virtually everyone in my social circle that i normally know i can rely on to help keep those of us less-employable queers afloat is under severe financial duress to the degree they've had to pull out of doing any of that for the foreseeable, and as a result - my current expected net income per month for the foreseeable future, as far as i can plan on it being, is limited to what i make on patreon: exactly $171. and right when i have medical debts incurred from veterinary intervention to save my cat's life that i need to pay off monthly or start incurring severe interest on, too! ain't life grand? i don't know when, or even if, i'll be able to change this state of affairs; in an ideal world, i'd be able to claim self-employment and have it be true. we do not live in an ideal world, so my best shot at that is asking for you to support my patreon or buy my work off itch.

in fact, i am asking, just short of begging, for you to do one or both of these things before any other option. it's not that i don't need immediate financial aid, because i do. but more than that: i need to fucking survive, bitch. i need to reliably have enough money to keep a roof over my head and food in my mouth and if i can accomplish both of those things i can also do the other, fun things that people like to get from me, like long, thoughtful critiques of this piece of art or that piece of media or any number of other things that i am compelled by my demons to produce awhile. you may notice some of that's dried up recently, and part of that's panic-induced brain spiral shutdown in effect. it is, in fact, easier to make art, criticism included, when you're not worrying whether buying a soda now means risking overdrafting on your cell phone bill later.

it's here where i wish i had hustle. i'd love to be one of those pledge allegiance to the grind types that you know only gets better the hungrier i am, give you something to look forward to as an earn on your investment in me and my future; unfortunately, i'm just not one of those people. hunger just makes me hungry, it doesn't make me more capable.

i won't make any promises i can't keep. but if you give me money, especially if you give me money i can consistently count on being there when i need it and enough of it i don't need to worry about what i'm gonna eat or where i'm gonna stay, there will be work made off the back of that financial security. and if you like any of the work i've done to date, both as a media critic and as a fiction writer, i can promise you it'll meet your expectations.

thanks for your time.

and here, for ease of access, some links:

my patreon my itch.io account paypal ko-fi venmo (i do not currently have a working cashapp account. sorry.)

[iaiamothrafhtagn]

the Bro is tormenting me with this image again and i refuse to suffer being reminded of it alone

[iaiamothrafhtagn]

only post i will directly add to this

for the record

the Bro is my girlfriend

[footlongdingledong]

american idiot but all the lyrics are removed except for the f slur

[acemarkey]

Visit Original Link

[privatejoker]

if you have OCD that moralistic post it not about you. keep scrolling. i love you

[privatejoker]

yeah even the one that gave you that sinking terror and has you planning your penance behavior and going through your whole life trying to identify when you did whatever it said about prejudice or abuse or whatever. it's not about you they don't know you and they certainly don't care about you

[twiststreet]

'Right now I'm just trying to get the stories done': Catching up with Kyle Baker - The Comics Journal

Even among multi-hyphenates, Kyle Baker stands apart. After earning his stripes at Marvel Comics in the early ‘80s, he moved on to writing a

I wasn't going to, but now I guess I have to ask … I saw a trailer for the next Captain America movie and there's a character of yours in that. You know, it’s Marvel. No, I don't have anything to do with that. I stay out of it. That book was done as a favor for my friend Bob Morales. Again, there's always some weird reason for me to do these jobs. [Laughs] Are you going to get an invite to the premiere? Or I guess be listed in the thank you card in the credits? I don't care. [Laughs] Can you eat a thank-you card? Is my kid gonna pay for college with the thank-you card? Will my doctor take that? “You got a thousand dollars?” “No, I was in the thank-you card!” I don't give a shit! My family was buying crap at the mall that’s got my art on it. I'm like, “Don't!” You're gonna cost me money now on something I don't make money on.

[3liza]

"everyone suddenly seems really stupid and aggressive" its brain damage from covid

"im sick all the time now and everyone at work is sick all the time" its immune system damage from covid

"im sick again, but i tested and its not covid haha" its still probably covid, rapid covid tests have been estimated at 30% positive accuracy by researchers who are factoring in strain mutation and user error

"no one can drive anymore, what happened" its brain damage from covid

"why am i suddenly mentally ill" its brain damage from covid

"i started feeling weak, breathless, confused, distracted, irritable and in pain but it was a while after i got covid so its not long covid" long covid sets in a random number of months after your covid infection and also asymptomatic covid can cause it

"ive still never gotten covid, isnt that great" unless you are an undiscovered genetic freak (possible) or youve been living in a clean room, you have had a covid infection. it may have been asymptomatic

"im sick but its from blood clots, heart disease, asthma, nerve damage, narcolepsy, etc" covid attacks the entire body and can cause all of these things as downstream effects

"ive already had covid so i probably have pretty good immunity by now" covid does not work like this. the more times you are infected, the more permanently injured you will become, and the more vulnerable to further covid infections and infections of all other viruses and bacteria

"ive been vaccinated so im safe" covid does not work like this. vaccination lowers your likelihood of developing severe infection, it does not protect you from contracting the virus

"well what am i supposed to do" wear a mask

[3liza]

this is going to surprise the segment of this website that doesnt keep up with medical research but latest research shows that narcolepsy is likely an auto-immune condition triggered by infection, any kind of infection. we already have ample documentation of narcolepsy following covid-19 infection. if you already have narcolepsy and get covid-19, the narcolepsy is likely to get worse.

as for cancer,

Since the pandemic began, some oncologists have noted a rise in cancer cases, including rare cancers among younger adults. Early data from national sources and some large cancer institutions also suggests that there has been an increase in aggressive, late-stage cancers. "We started noticing some very unusual patterns," said Kashyap Patel, CEO of the Carolina Blood and Cancer Care Associates. According to The Hill, Patel and his colleagues have seen a 20% to 30% increase in new patients, multiple patients with several different cancers, couples and siblings developing cancers within months of each other, and patients relapsing after years of remission. According to Patel, he believes that inflammation associated with COVID-19 may be contributing to this new rise in cancer cases. "Inflammation triggers many genetic changes in a genome that can create a propensity of developing cancer in certain individuals," Patel said. "I'm analyzing close to 300 patients' data on the inflammatory biomarkers in the body with Long COVID antibodies … and if they had an unusual cancer."

Since the pandemic, there has been a rise in new cancer cases, including rare and aggressive, late-stage cancers — and some physicians and r

this isnt widely understood by laymen because cancer is complicated and a very broad category of disease. but the oversimplified way to explain cancer risk is that cancer more often occurs in areas of tissue that have been damaged in any way. if you get sunburned a lot, those cells have a higher chance of becoming cancerous. if you get infected with viruses and bacteria a lot, those cells have a higher chance of becoming cancerous. and so many viruses can cause or contribute cancer, including probably the most well-known to the general public, HPV. even physical contusions and bruises, especially in the same places over a long period of time, increase cancer risk to those areas.

what everyone needs to understand about covid is that it affects everything. if you catch a regular influenza virus after catching covid, the damage that covid did to your body will make the resulting flu worse for you even if the covid virus is no longer active in your body. in the same way that it is harder to tolerate a bad day at work when you have a hangover, tolerating the normal, existing stressors, viruses, bacteria, and injuries of daily life has become more difficult and costly. catching a cold will make you sicker. preexisting conditions like narcolepsy and cancer will get worse. if you are a child, your developmental processes are being interrupted by the infection, with unknown later consequences.

every single thing is now complicated by a new handicap, or debuff, or whatever you want to call it, everywhere, all the time. this is what people dont understand. all your coworkers and distant family or if youre unlucky, friends and relatives, who have suddenly been getting sick or dying in slightly higher numbers than seem normal, even if it's something like "their lung cancer suddenly got worse" or "they died from appendicitis in a weird way 35 year olds arent supposed to" or "their dementia got a lot worse very quickly in a way we didn't expect" or "they cant work enough hours to buy the food they need anymore because theyre just feeling really shitty all the time" or "we thought i was regular food poisoning but it just doesnt seem to be getting better and its been six months now" or "they have a genetic condition which sometimes causes heart problems and suddenly all those heart problems showed up in the past four years", we're not saying that's literally an active covid infection, it's the consequences of covid's long term damage making regular stuff worse.

i dont really understand why the idea of "cause and effect" is so difficult for the average person to grasp but i dont understand a lot of things

[faircastle]

Leavetaking (S01E01) To Race the Shadow (S03E01)

requested by anonymous

[csarracenian]

Black Swan Ace

A short comic pilot to test the waters with this new character & story concept, to work out my interests new & old (Weird Fiction, 60s-70s Showa aesthetics, Chinese horror stylings, Ranma, the character of Naoto Shirogane, etc.)

(originally posted on patreon)

[noknowshame]

I’m watching Splash (1984) which is a romcom about a guy who falls in love with a mermaid, and when she chooses a human name she chooses Madison and guy says “that’s not a real name, but alright” which seems to imply that Madison was not a name until at least the 80’s and all girls named Madison are actually named after the mermaid. thought you should know

[brbeth]

I think...you might be right

[brownheadedcowbird]

what the fuck

[pissmoon]

Heartwarming! 19 year old punk historian on the internet doesnt know what a skinhead is

[atalana]

the curse of adhd:

i will remember with absolute clarity, when the thought strikes me that i have a text to send someone, that this is the fourth time in three days i've attempted to send this specific text

i will forget, in the time it takes me to pick up my phone, that i picked it up intending to send a text

[xenasaur]

this is something that I think a lot of people don't understand abt adhd. and like. this shit can get scary, especially if it happens often. I hate that I can't remember what I'm doing for the entire time it takes me to do it. I hate having to pause in the middle of conversations to desperately attempt to re-trace my train of thought because I don't remember what we're talking about. like. if you don't have adhd. just try to imagine what it's like to be unable to carry out a full conversation. try to imagine your memory resetting at random intervals. what are you doing right now? do you know? because often times, I fucking Forget. in the middle of doing things. and then I'm just standing there like an idiot desperately trying to wave away the thick fog that exists in my brain 24/7. and sometimes that shit just doesn't work. and I forget for good. it's terrifying. to me, at least.

[toskarin]

the "no one stops" exchange is nauseating in its original context and also an enormous glowing neon red reason why I get frustrated at people's first experience with nier being automata. it's really hard to get that first contextualisation of it back

[sarkos]

““It’s a type of mutation called a nonsense mutation,” he said. “That’s because it breaks a gene, it inactivates it from doing what the cell needs it to do.” It basically put a stop sign, called a stop codon, toward the beginning of the KEAP1 gene. Stop codons generally signal where a gene ends, so having one at the start would “break” the gene. This mutation kills mice, probably because it allows too much “smoke” to build up in cells. So Castiglione was stumped. “We thought, wow, how are horses dealing with this?” The researchers found that these mutations, which arose in the ancestors of all modern horses, allow their muscle cells to produce up to five times more energy than mouse cells, while simultaneously ramping up their damage-control system by 200%. “This provides them with the biochemical means to run fast and over long distances,” said Duh. This ultimately helps them become aerobic powerhouses.”

—

The unique genetic change that turned horses into athletic powerhouses : NPR

Finally, long range mice

[iaiamothrafhtagn]

horses: not even once

[lauralot89]

Actual things that happen in the 1897 Dracula novel, without context:

A character has ominous nightmares and attributes them to eating too much paprika

Dracula first appears wearing a fake beard

The person he was trying to fool with the fake beard immediately realizes Dracula and Beard Guy are the same man, due to both having really firm handshakes

We are told parrots are immortal unless fatally wounded

A Texan cowboy opens fire on a bat flitting around a window, and lodges a bullet in the wall of an occupied room

A woman is called a polyandrist for receiving blood transfusions from multiple men

An incorrectly addressed telegram leads to two deaths, multiple druggings, and several children being assaulted

Dracula, while trying to maintain a low profile, takes a lovely trip to the zoo and freaks out the animals so badly that he gets mentioned in a newspaper article

The one character who knows anything about vampires spends a good two-thirds of the book refusing to talk about vampires

Dracula went to Satan's Witchcraft Academy and somehow this is only brought up in two throwaway lines

A character gets stuck inside a circle of communion wafer crumbs

A major plot point of the book is Dracula (who was said to be a brilliant scholar and has the strength of twenty mortal men) realizing he can move boxes without human help

Someone is referred to as "manifestly a prig of the first water"

Two characters have a hobby of reading train schedules

A hospital lets a mental patient escape to see what will happen

A character starts vomiting up feathers from eating whole birds

A doctor refuses to give a medical diagnosis and instead makes a speech about growing corn

Dracula impersonates another character just by wearing the same clothes, despite being taller and visibly much older. This deception is successful.

A character "cleans" a room by eating all the insects in it

Suddenly: rats. Thousands of them.

The heroes progress in their efforts through "the wonderful power of money," i.e., bribery

Dracula has three other vampires in his castle. Their relation to him is never explained, nor are any of them named.

A character insists his salvation depends on having a pet cat

Dracula is thwarted by flowers on more than one occasion

A group of vampires stand in the hall outside a man's bedroom, talking loudly about their plans to eat him. When he comes to the door to confront them, they run away laughing

Dracula wears an unfashionable hat and gets roasted for it

A group of Romanians encounter a disheveled, shouting man and, "seeing from his violent demeanour that he was English, they [give] him a ticket for the furthest station on the way thither that the train reached."

A boat crashes due to Dracula having the munchies

A wolf is thrown through a window and immediately runs off, confused and covered in glass

Dracula makes a bed

[top-lil]

okay wait since you're still here! Was 'down with cis' a joke post all along?

yeah, it was a poorly written joke based largely on those "and then the whole bus clapped" sorts of stories

[monsterfactoryfanfic]

As it was becoming clear the US was headed into trade war territory, I got really interested in farming and the logistics of keeping people fed. I turned that interest into "your cool city needs a food supply," available now!

it's a hack of "i'm sorry did you say street magic" and "Microscope," two gold-standard worldbuilding games. It was polished by Nico MacDougall, who gave me some great advice on how to make this game really align with the themes and ideas I had in the draft.

I've always been a sicko about logistics and agriculture (growing up in the US midwest will do that to you), and I hope this game helps people think about how great a privilege it is to eat.

[toast1862]

honestly sometimes stories where characters have self awareness and solve their problems maturely can be really refreshing sometimes. and sometimes it feels like therapyspeak slop. intense stories where no one is capable of understanding themselves and act out in incorrect ways can be very fun. and sometimes it feels like contrived bullshit. whatever makes "a good story" is harder to make happen than just using the right kind of characters using the right words