sammii with two eyes

[iamsamtastik]

Miss Landlord: The One

Miss Landlord: The One

I found the one.

I had downloaded the Property24 and Private Property apps on my phone and set up alerts to notify me when property within my preferences entered the market. My ideal target date to find an apartment that I liked, was 26 July 2019. I say “ideal” because even if it had not happened by then, I still wanted it to happen in 2019, so it would not have been a train smash. I just…

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[iamsamtastik]

Miss LandLord: The Process

Miss LandLord: The Process

No one really tells you how tedious the process is. No one really tells you how expensive it is, either. I mean, they kinda tell you but they don’t tell you with a tone that’s emphatic enough. I just got ballpark timelines and estimated costs, but even then, I thought they were joking.

In comparison to other people’s experiences, apparently mine was smooth sailing. Between the day I found the…

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[iamsamtastik]

Miss Landlord: The Beginning

Miss Landlord: The Beginning I wrote (& might continue writing) a series of posts about my experience with buying a home & home ownership to ease my anxiety around it. I haven't overcome it completely but writing helped a little xo

The journey to finding and buying my first home made me more anxious than I’d ever been in quite a long time. The kind of anxiety that makes you want to throw up at the thought of going through the process, but it had to be done. Consequently, I forgot to journal about the process as things were happening, so this is my attempt.

I will start with the background.

I lived in Pretoria and work in…

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[iamsamtastik]

Dear Dad

Open letter to my Dad on his 60th birthday xo

Dear Dad

For as long as I can remember, I have always been your little girl. I remember being a tomboy and you would clean my wounds from all the outdoor activities I enjoyed so much: riding my bicycle, skating, rollerblading, climbing trees for no reason at all and generally running up and down. I remember always wanting to go wherever you were going. It didn’t matter where, as long as I was…

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[iamsamtastik]

A Little Hooray

my fear of celebrating happy moments.

I tend to go through periods when I write quite a bit and then I don’t write for months on end. I want to blame it on “writers’ block” and maybe it is, but there are two things that I have noticed about these quiet periods:

I tend to write when I’m going through something or when I have just overcome something, therefore I don’t write because I’m not sad enough to do it.

I fear being judged,…

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[iamsamtastik]

Feature - Your Corporate Black Girl

Feature – Your Corporate Black Girl

“Always give it your best. Take pride in your work. The right people will notice.” — Read on www.yourcorporateblackgirl.com/careerstories/samantha

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[iamsamtastik]

Gratitude

I wrote about my struggle with gratitude. At times, it’s difficult for me to be appreciative when I know I want so much more from life.

For fear of seeming extremely ungrateful, this has taken me a while to write. But I need to know that I am not crazy, or at the very least, that I am not alone in this.

I often reflect on my struggles and the struggles of others. Of course, comparing (I dislike the negative connotation(s) associated with that word) struggles doesn’t make mine any easier, but in an attempt to see my life in a…

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[iamsamtastik]

Rainbow Bridge

It’s like drowning or constantly being smothered under a pillow.

That’s how being alive feels… daily.

It’s like I’m programmed to say and do and feel certain things to get through each day. I’m here and I’m there but I’m not present anywhere. I’m detached. I’m tired. I’m frustrated. I’m cutting?

Woah.

And then it’s time to sleep. And the only happy thought that sends me into deep slumber is hope…

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[iamsamtastik]

Coconut Tree

I wrote a little bit about what it was like growing up black but not generally being accepted by black people until much later in life, because my cultural dynamic was uncommon.

I read a blog post by a friend’s sister about her experiences growing up biracial, and how they affected her outlook on herself along the way. I was inspired to write about my own experience because even though my skin tone is worlds apart from hers, we had fairly similar experiences. Like her, I was not the most racially and/or culturally aware person growing up. I played with other children not…

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[iamsamtastik]

Self-Love

Can't remember who said this to me but I needed it today.

Self-love means realising that you, your happiness, your honesty and your journey should always selfishly come first. This is a single life. You don’t get to go again. Focus on molding yourself into a work of art. When it comes to others, kindness and vulnerability are usually the formula but it takes bravery, practice, a thick skin and possibly a lifetime to achieve all these qualities. And…

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[iamsamtastik]

3AM on a Friday.

Wrote about my anxiety attacks [lately], during an anxiety attack. Lol.

My anxiety manifests itself in strange ways lately. Okay, maybe not strange, but in prolonged ways that I am not used to managing. Actually, I don’t even know if it’s strange because I’ve never read up on it, but maybe someone might find this relatable. Something that makes me anxious will start small. It often starts with a pet peeve; a triggering person; or someone who I’m around often enough,…

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[iamsamtastik]

Rock Bottom: a Basement or a Foundation?

I wanted to stay off Twitter, but I didn’t know how. Before I took my Twitter hiatus, I went on the following rant: It’s kinda nice to be able to come here for chuckles or to vent when you’ve had a hard day. I won’t lie though, it is often tough to see such amazing things happening for other people when your life is in absolute shambles and all your hope has been smashed to smithereens. “I got…

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[iamsamtastik]

Feature on Miranda's Inside Scoop

Feature on Miranda’s Inside Scoop

Seakanyo Miranda Seakgosing (aka Sa’Khino) is a fashion stylist based in Melbourne, Australia. The other day I was featured on her fashion blog Miranda’s Inside Scoop.We had a photo shoot in Uganda which was loads of fun! I’m so glad I got to be a part of her blog because I am such a huge fan! Check out the feature here: Skirting Around, UG style … You can also: Like her Facebook page…

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[iamsamtastik]

learn to live IN THE MOMENT

Experience the present!

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[iamsamtastik]

Me & The Corporate Whale

Wrote about my [dreadful] experience in corporate so far.

I’m not particularly religious but the Bible story of Jonah and the Whale seems to be a perfect way to describe my corporate experience so far. For those that are not familiar with the story, the following is my understanding of a Googled summary: Jonah was ordered by God to go somewhere. He refused and boarded a ship to go some place else. In response, God sent a storm in the ship’s direction as…

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[iamsamtastik]

A WCW. A mother of 3. A pouter. A flame. (at Midrand, Gauteng)

[iamsamtastik]

Mama: I can't stick my tongue out Me: why? Mama: ndimdala haibo?! #WCW ❤️ (at Rabie Ridge Thembisa)