no one look At Me!

lesbian | autistic | 21 | nyc ⋆‧°𓏲ּ𝄢 name’s laura, main is ciinelqura.

[ilyasgaybsf]

people say ilya would listen to tiktoks full volume while shane is overstimulated and i disagree but i do think he would start laughing really hard at one of those videos of people reading out memes while subway surfers plays in the background and the sound of him trying to stop himself laughing wakes shane up who becomes so emdeerd watching his husband laugh that he can’t even be mad

[hr-violations]

[lavenderprose]

Ottawa wins the Cup, wins it in LA, and due to the proximity to stardom and the several actual celebrities who make a point to come out and celebrate with the Centaurs, there are approximately seven hundred angles of the festivities on every social media by the following morning.

One of these is your classic TMZ highly invasive round-the-corner spy shot of Shane and Ilya--like, waiting for an Uber, is what it looks like, and the bass from inside the club is pounding and you can barely hear what they're saying except that the guy standing next to them is also TMZ and he's got a directional mic sticking out of his pocket pointed at them and when he gets into position you can hear Shane Hollander, like, fucking giggle.

"I'm sorry," Shane says, and his arms are around Ilya's neck. "I got--I'm a little drunk."

"It's okay," Ilya says, and he brushes a hand through Shane's hair. "Did you have fun?"

"Ye-s-s-s," Shane says, nodding his head decisively. "We won the Cu-p."

"Yes we did. I am proud of you."

"I'm proud of you!" Shane cups a hand around the back of Ilya's neck and giggles again into his shoulder. "Why aren't you drunk? I drank the same things as you--"

"I'm drunk," Ilya chuckles. "But I have twenty pounds on you and I am Russian, so."

"That's not a thing. That's not really a thing." Shane sighs and goes a bit boneless against Ilya's body and says, "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have, uh--"

"Shh. You said you had fun, and this is all that matters. My beautiful winner." He kisses the side of Shane's face, loudly and repeatedly.

Shane makes a sound that Twitter, TikTok and Instagram comment sections will all agree is a purr.

There are also, by the following morning, about a hundred discrete comments on various platforms that all say some version of Oh I just know he talks him through it.

[ngalitzine]

💛

[cloudabserk]

i propose a new day of the week called hollanov thursday

[barbie-verse]

and yk whats the worst part about the fanmail incident? you KNOW hayden pike had the most atrocious millennial pause at the start of the video

[ilyasgaybsf]

he was staring into space while shane and ilya made out sloppy style in the mirror behind him for like a solid five seconds before going “Hi Brad! 😀😀 Happy birthday!!😁😁”

[verlierer-is-lost]

Baby Hollanov AU

They’re about 9 or 10. Ilya doesn’t know any English yet, but they still become besties

(SOMEONE PLEASE WRITE THIS FIC)

[cloudabserk]

puppy learning to play

[cloudabserk]

i think shane and ilya are both terrible smilers. real 5-year-old-at-his-first-picture-day energy

[barbie-verse]

heated rivalry twitter (46/?) the people on the bird app grow more concerned by the day

[clytemnestraaa]

i do appreciate that my heatriv dash is really evenly spaced between horniness and trauma so i scroll and it goes “shane wants to play ring toss on ilya’s dick” / “do you think shane had any friends growing up i think nobody came to his birthday parties and he was scared of balloons” / “i knoooow shane cries every time he finally gets it in his mouth lmao” / “what does a center forward do again?” / “so how do we feel about gaping” / “wait WAS ilya gonna jump off that roof?” and i’m just watching it all bounce back and forth like that challengers gif of tashi watching the match

[hrgifs]

We haven't had time to see your show yet. It's about hockey, right? Yeah, kind of.

[hrsocials]

.twenty-four / more randoms

[shanesloverboy]

Ilya post Heated Rivalry is the character of all time. He's a bisexual menace. He's in everyone's business. He's in love. He's so down bad for his boyfriend that it makes him sick but he can't let on to that fact because no one knows. He clocks the gays from a mile away and takes them under his care. He's the best wingman. He coaches kids so well his bf wants to get him pregnant. He's wildly depressed and slightly suicidal but doesn't tell anyone since he thinks it makes him weak. He hides behind being abrasive and kind of mean as a protection against rejection. He tells his bf he should sleep with other people even though it kills him because deep down he doesn't feel good enough. He's willing to sacrifice his own happiness and everything he wants for the people he cares about because he doesn't know any other way. I love Ilya Rozanov so much it hurts.

[fruitygay]

shane doesn’t go to the montreal gay bars because of the killer. which he thinks is really the spectre of homophobia. but is actually lestat

[snap-crackle-cunt]

yuna and david: wait i thought u were a slut. like. ur canonically a whore?

ilya: why yes. i am slut for your son. i am ultimate whore for your autistic son

[lilliesandpucks]

“your face isn’t even in it, Hollander. calm down.”