wild and useless

🖤🤡🖤

[imthejokercard]

bought tickets for a concert for my favorite band for 75 dollars and then after i got here i noticed there were floor seats for 200 i bought them

i regret my decision so much

[imthejokercard]

i also brought my friend

$550

oops

[imthejokercard]

update, some dude gave us his tickets to the mosh pit and i was like 15 yards from the stage

[imthejokercard]

bought tickets for a concert for my favorite band for 75 dollars and then after i got here i noticed there were floor seats for 200 i bought them

i regret my decision so much

[imthejokercard]

i also brought my friend

$550

oops

[imthejokercard]

bought tickets for a concert for my favorite band for 75 dollars and then after i got here i noticed there were floor seats for 200 i bought them

i regret my decision so much

[imthejokercard]

Dream after he collected all his tools:

[imthejokercard]

i never ever thought i’d make a meme like this but netflix’s the Sandman adaptation has got me making them

[imthejokercard]

That Expedia commercial is all we’re getting guys 😣🤚🏼

[imthejokercard]

“I’m only watching the Super Bowl for the commercials”

Shut up I’m only watching it for my MoM trailer and the possibility of a Kenobi trailer and then I’m going home

[imthejokercard]

I was watching Spider-Man with my sister and I asked “what would you do if you woke up with superpowers?” And she thought for a second a sighed, not looking up from her phone and said “pretend I didn’t”

[imthejokercard]

STOP IT IT’S LITERALLY THE MEME

[imthejokercard]

Involves Loki content//// ?spoilers?

These two have the same mysterious villain-disguised-as-a-sweet-innocent-side-character vibes

[nicola-coughlan]

Florence Pugh as Yelena Belova BLACK WIDOW (2021), dir. Cate Shortland

[imthejokercard]

OKAY LISTEN UP IF YOU LIKE SUPERNATURAL AND JOHN MULANEY THIS IS IMPORTANT

I have a theory

Hear me out

So first here is a little timeline.

J.J. Bittenbinder joined the Chicago P.D. in 1971.

John and Mary Winchester got married in 1975

Dean was then born on January 24th, 1979.

John Mulaney was born on August 26th, 1982 in Chicago.

A fun and possible theory is that John Winchester was in Chicago and met Ellen Muleney in July of 1982. He was in Chicago for work and I believe he was doing some everyday thing and ran into Ellen Muleney and saved her life by accident. She thanks him profusely and he spends the day with her, to make sure she was okay since she was 8 months pregnant. Now, since John Winchester was so nice, Ellen decides to name her son (to be born a month later) after her lifesaver. John then goes back to Kansas where Mary gets pregnant that August with Sam.

That is a side theory, here is the real one.

I own John Winchester’s Hunting Journal that I bought at a book sale. I was going through the dates of 1987, where Dean would have been in 3rd grade. On May 17th, 1987, John W. writes in his journal “Already, I’m trying to figure out what to do about school in the fall. I’m starting to figure out that you can move a kid from school to school every month”. However, later on January 24th, 1988, (Dean’s ninth birthday) John W. writes “He’s (Dean) been in three schools already this year. Who knows how many more?”. So, this means that Dean had been to three different schools between September 1987 and January 1988, a mere four months. However, in these four months, we don’t have any intel on where the Winchesters were.

I think I know.

We know that J.J. Bittenbinder gave his assembly about “Street Smarts” in the 1980s (every year) and according to John Muleney, he heard this speech when he was 7 years old, the second grade. An assembly is given to the entire school, not just one class so it was an elementary school. Dean was 8 in 1987 (third grade, elementary school). Therefore, I can say, with almost certainty, that Dean Winchester attended a J.J. Bittenbinder assembly about Street Smarts and absolutely loved it.

You cannot tell me that Dean would not worship a man who told him how to stay safe and who wore a cowboy hat.

So the Winchesters were in Chicago in September of 1987.

Now, here is a little more. Dean would come home and tell Sam all about the Bittenbinder method and Sam would love it. Love it so much that he wanted to grow up to be just like J.J. Bittenbinder. Now, Sam “abandoned” the Wichester family to attend Law school. Now, why would Sam Wincerster want to attend law school? I believe that it is because Sam wanted to become a police officer like J.J. Bittenbinder but it was too similar to the family business, so he did the next closest thing, Law school. I also believe that the Bittenbbinder method helped Sam on at LEAST 1 LSAT question.

[imthejokercard]

“Something gold was glinting just above him. The Snitch! He tried to catch it, but his arms were too heavy.

He blinked. It wasn't the Snitch at all. It was a pair of glasses. How strange.

He blinked again. The smiling face of Albus Dumbledore swam into view above him.

"Good afternoon, Harry," said Dumbledore.”

-Harry Potter and the Philosphers Stone

Okay I’m sorry but all I can picture is Harry, half unconscious trying to catch Dumbledore’s nose. Reaching up, probably drooling, grasping at Dumbledore’s long nose, and then Dumbledore just allowing it to happen😂

Can someone PLEASE draw this I can’t art, man

[imthejokercard]

Guys I did not die laughing for 6 notes. I need somebody to draw this

[imthejokercard]

“Something gold was glinting just above him. The Snitch! He tried to catch it, but his arms were too heavy.

He blinked. It wasn't the Snitch at all. It was a pair of glasses. How strange.

He blinked again. The smiling face of Albus Dumbledore swam into view above him.

"Good afternoon, Harry," said Dumbledore.”

-Harry Potter and the Philosphers Stone

Okay I’m sorry but all I can picture is Harry, half unconscious trying to catch Dumbledore’s nose. Reaching up, probably drooling, grasping at Dumbledore’s long nose, and then Dumbledore just allowing it to happen😂

Can someone PLEASE draw this I can’t art, man

[shymagnolia]

so I got into grad school today with my shitty 2.8 gpa and the moral of the story is reblog those good luck posts for the love of god

[shymagnolia]

okay so i just got my dream job??? a week after applying to it?? and now i’m thinking….maybe this is the good luck post

[flagellant]

…..not even six hours later i got an offer of a well paying full time long-term job with free room and board in queens in nyc, allowing me independence and a way to escape an abusive situation and an unhealthy environment

likes charge reblogs cast, folks, this is the good luck post

[imthejokercard]

I ain’t takin no chance

Edit: I got 51/50 on my final, THIS is the good luck post

[imdcathsmeow29]

WHEN THEY SHOWED THE DUKE OF WESELTON DANCING LIKE A CHICKEN ELSA ACTUALLY SHOOK HER SHOULDERS PLAYFULLY AS IF DANCING ALONG

OH MY ANGELSA

[felstypants]

[imthejokercard]

WHEN I TELL YOU MY HEART