Milk Tea

*writing queer stories*

[cloudabserk]

actually men getting off to lesbians has been a mainstream idea for a long time. basically every sitcom for at least the past 30 years jokes about it. and yeah there are some homophobic or disrespectful women out there but imo the average woman engaging with boys love content is far more considerate and thoughtful about men’s inner worlds than the average man jerking it to girl on girl porn is towards women’s.

maybe men should start writing several thousand word fanfics on women’s complex nuanced lesbian love affairs. and women should start ignoring men’s inherent humanity while jacking it to videos of two shirtless guys making out. would that be less of a double standard?

[intermilktea]

CLOCK IT

[pregnanthudsonwilliams]

au where shane has a burner twitter account that he uses to keep up with hockey stuff, not just players and stats but what the commentary is from fans and talking heads, and one day he sees a take from a podcast bro that pisses him off so bad he HAS to tweet about it. so he replies to the podcast with the most devastating one liner you've ever heard and suddenly thousands of people are following him and asking for more takes etc and he becomes a pretty popular account in the hockey world (and beyond bc the tweets are just too good) and crucially!!! he is always hyping up ilya. like if a ref makes a shitty call he's coming to ilya's defense immediately. and of course at some point ilya follows him too. and the whole time he's becoming more popular on twitter nobody knows it's him, his mom brings up 'that rozanov superfan on twitter' at dinner, hayden brings it up in the locker room, etc, and shane is just like. laughing nervously. yeah i've heard of them i guess. meanwhile he didn't even realize he was hyping ilya up so much he was just giving good hockey commentary. and then ilya brings up his superfan while they're at the cottage. i'm on the cover of the fucking game. i have important hockey superfan on twitter, you are jealous. and shane would have to decide whether he's going keep lying or face the humiliation of telling ilya the truth

[intermilktea]

Omggg that's so cute

[furyred-ao3]

I have this thought about Ilya demanding kisses.

We all know he loves a "gimme kiss." Imagine at some point he starts a tally- every time Shane is too busy reading or doing yoga Ilya is like well that's twenty you owe me now. That's fifty. My boyfriend owes one hundred kisses we must call in debt collectors.

And Shane is a Silly Goose™️ at heart so of course he starts playing too. Does it have to be kisses or can I pay you back some other way? Ilya is smiling fondly, Shane sprawled across him on the couch. Hmm I don't know Hollander we would need to work out fair trade- what are you offering? Somehow they get onto conversion rates. A blow job is ten kisses. Fuck off Rozanov that's clearly worth twenty. What about anal? Maybe fifty, but seventy-five if you come on my cock. And it's all very cute and very flirty and both boys are lying there grinning at each other, up until Shane says We'll have to tell my dad about this. And his eyes go wide and his face is flushing and he's saying no no I mean cause he works for the Treasury Board of Canada and we're talking about currencies and stuff. Meanwhile Ilya is laughing so hard he is in danger of causing himself an injury.

[intermilktea]

And we all love our Shane

[intermilktea]

Draco and Harry living together after Hogwarts because they became friends kind of during eighth year, and well they both had no one and didn't want to live alone, so you know, let's be roommate. Ah but also, I realised yeah I don't have as much nightmares when we're sleeping in the same bed, okay, let's share a bed then.

They can't envision their future without the other in it, and everytime someone is like, are you guys a couple or like in love??? And they're like, no but we're friends. It's normal. We're best friends. We love each other very much. It's not like *that* you know??

[intermilktea]

Draco finding Harry in the Astronomy Tower about to end his life, saving him, convincing him that there's other ways, he doesn't have to do this.

Harry letting himself open up with Draco, allowing himself to cry, be angry, be resentful, and Draco just being there and holding him through it.

In the days and weeks that follow, Draco tries to take care of Harry, talk with him, let him know he's not alone.

He eventually convinces him to go see a professional. And as life goes on, and as struggles come and go, they fall in love without noticing it.

And this guys is Fastidious on ao3.

[intermilktea]

Hollanov Cold War AU Hollanov where the Rozanovs go to the United-States because Gregori has been sent to the soviet embassy to work with the americans after Churchill's speech with the iron curtain, but Irina Rozanova escapes with Ilya to Canada at the rise of McCarthyism or smth. She gets in contact with an old girl friend she went to uni with in an exchange program in like Oxford ten years ago or smth who turns out to be Yuna Hollander and then when they arrive they get help to settle in Ottawa.

Then Ilya and Shane fall in love. Obvi.

[cloudabserk]

oh since i’m oversharing. a few weeks ago i had a dream about spending a passionate yet surprisingly chaste night with the mayor of new york and his wife and ever since i haven’t been able to watch his interviews or press releases without getting flustered :/

[icaruswar]

trying to study art history and getting distracted every time a hellenistic statue appears in my course notes because it reminds me of connor storrie. if i fail this course, im gonna be blaming him for it.

[intermilktea]

And you'll have all the rights to do so

[zambonioperator]

timbits shane with mama and papa

[intermilktea]

OMGGGG I WANNA BITE SHANE HE'S SO CUTE WTF

[intermilktea]

In eighth year, Draco finds Harry on a cold night at the top of the astronomy tower about to jump off and end his life. He becomes the only person Harry can talk to.

Fastidious on AO3

[bugslibraryy]

Ilya getting all kiss drunk after making out with Shane for ages. Like curled up on the couch, Shane in his lap, thick blanket wrapped around them because it’s winter and the house is cold but they are so warm pressed together. They both been too sleepy to take it any further- it’s late after a game that ran into overtime, that they both came out of bruised. Shane’s hands have been in Ilya’s hair the whole time, combing through the curls, playing with them, scratching at his scalp the back of his neck and Ilya feels hypnotised, dazed from exhaustion and Shane’s hot pretty mouth and he could die right now and he’d go happily. Ilya’s hands are everywhere, all over Shane’s back and ass and shoulders an up the front of his shirt and over his jaw and his ears, thumbs rubbing his pretty earlobes and he’s so hard but content to do nothing about it really, can feel Shane’s own hardness pressed to him and he he’s so comfortable and his arms are heavy with exhaustion but he can’t keep his hands off Shane, wanting to feel him.

Shane pulls back properly for the first time in ages and Ilya whines a little, eyes still closed chin tilted up mouth searching for Shane’s blindly, leaning in in and he only gets air and he lets out another soft needy sound and Shane’s hands slide down from his hair to cup his face and Ilya looks drunk, swaying a little into Shane’s touch and his hair is fucked, curls frizzy and crazy from Shane’s fingers and his mouth is literally swollen, lips shiny with spit an his perfect cupids bow a little puffy. His fingers are gripping at Shane’s hips pulling him in in and Shane laughs, sways forward and presses his nose to Ilya’s cheek and soothes a hand over the back of his head and Ilya is kiss kiss kiss at Shane’s jaw and ear and wherever he can reach and mumbling come back in Russian and Shane grins because he can understand it without thought and Ilya is nuzzling their faces together into his mouth finds his way back to Shane’s and kisses him like it’s been weeks not seconds. Shane hums and tries to pull back again only for Ilya to wrap his arm round Shane’s shoulders, press him closer to him, other hand coming to his face, holding his jaw so he can push his tongue into his mouth and kiss him wet and filthy. Shane shivers because it’s so much and so fucking good and Ilyas moans into his mouth and Shane manages to mumble “we should go to bed” between slick hot kisses and Ilya says “okay” but keeps kissing kissing kissing Shane. They pull apart when Ilya literally is almost lulled half to sleep by the rhythmic pull of their lips and Shane is literally dragging Ilya to their room, Ilya wrapped around him from behind like he is trying to merge their bodies, kissing all up and down Shane’s neck, shoulders the back of his head.

[intermilktea]

Fucking Noble Price.

[louiemoons]

IRS AU where Remus is an IRS agent and Sirius is committing tax evasion and then they fall in love.

(This is a joke)

(or is it)

[coffeestainedstars]

and i would read it

[louiemoons]

Okay, good to know! My Econ class is making me think crazy things but… they just might work?!

[coffeestainedstars]

EW ECON💔 i took ap macroeconomics last school year and it sucked

but YES I WOULD READ THAT

[intermilktea]

Honestly it might help me pass my economy class so Im all for it brother

[allthingswhumpyandangsty]

people, especially younger people/minors, on platforms like twitter, bluesky, tiktok and instagram are too comfortable with censorship without even knowing that it’s literally a fascist textbook. “so I am personally uncomfortable with these fictional things, therefore it deserves to be censored/erased from existence and anybody who disagrees with me should be harassed and crucified for it”

don’t like something? cool. curate your own internet experience by muting/blocking what you don’t want to see. don’t make it other people’s problem to censor themselves and cater to your personal comfort. no one in real life is getting harmed because a fanfiction someone somewhere writes is taboo.

[intermilktea]

Clock it

[nekoqueenalice]

PSA: AO3 Bots Are Getting Worse (And Here's What You Need To Know)

Alright so if you're active on AO3, you've probably heard about the bot problem. It's been going on for years but it's gotten way worse lately, so here's a breakdown of what's happening and how to protect yourself.

What Are AO3 Bots?

Basically spam accounts that leave comments on fics. They're automated and they've been plaguing the site since like 2021, but they keep getting more sophisticated.

Types of Bots You Might See:

Praise Bots - These leave super generic compliments that could apply to literally any fic. Stuff like "This is pure genius, I'm in awe of your world-building" or "This deserves all recognition." The dead giveaway is when someone praises your "heartwarming" fic when everyone literally died and the earth shattered around them lmao.

Hateful/Cruel Bots - These are the really fucked up ones. They scrape REAL AO3 usernames and attach them to horrible, cruel comments. So innocent people get their names attached to hateful shit they never said. If you see a mean comment, check if the username is clickable - if it's not linked to an actual profile, it's a bot.

Kudos Bots - Some authors have woken up to like 30-60 fake kudos dumped on their fics all at once, with no corresponding increase in hit counts. This completely destroys the metric system especially in smaller fandoms.

AI Accusation Bots - These accuse authors of using ChatGPT or other AI tools, sometimes on fics that are literally older than the AI programs they're being accused of using. Some link to "AI detection tools" which are likely just trying to get you to feed more fics into AI training databases.

Misinformation Bots - A newer type that showed up in May 2025 claiming AO3 was removing works to "conserve server space" and telling authors to delete their own work or risk being banned. Complete bullshit - AO3 has never done this and never will.

Mary Sue Bots - Accuse your OCs of being Mary Sues, even when your fic only has canon characters and no self-inserts at all.

Art Commission Scam Bots - Leave praise then offer to make comic/art commissions of your fic. They get you off-site to Discord or Instagram, take your payment, then either send AI-generated garbage or ghost you completely.

How Do They Work?

The bots comment as unregistered guests and scrape real AO3 usernames to attach to their comments. The username shows up but isn't clickable and has no actual profile associated with it (unless you search for that name directly, which makes it look legit at first).

The newer ones are getting smarter too - they scrape your fic's tags and use them to make the generic praise seem more personalized. So if you tagged "angst" they'll specifically mention emotions and tension.

How To Spot Them:

Username isn't clickable/has no profile

Generic praise that could apply to any fic

Comments that make zero sense for what actually happened in your story

Multiple comments hitting your fics really fast (like 7 comments timestamped over 9 hours)

Sudden spike in kudos with no matching increase in hits

Anyone trying to get you off-site for commissions or services

The Emotional Impact:

This shit genuinely hurts authors. Some don't realize they're bots at first and think the hate comments or AI accusations are real criticism of their writing. There's also concerns from neurodivergent and ESL authors who worry their real comments will be mistaken for bots because their writing style might seem stilted.

And if your username gets stolen? You might have to track down authors and explain that hateful comment wasn't actually you.

What You Can Do:

As an author:

Delete bot comments as soon as you spot them

If it gets bad, lock your comments to registered users only (Settings → Privacy → "Only show your work to registered users")

Report the comments if you can

As a reader/commenter:

Don't panic if your username got stolen - reach out to the author and explain it wasn't you

Keep leaving real comments! Authors need to know there are real people who love their work

Maybe make your comments a bit more specific/personal so authors know you're real

Everyone:

Spread awareness so people know what to look for

Don't feed fics into "AI detection tools" that bots link to

Why Are They Doing This?

Honestly? Probably to keep AI brands in the "fandom news" cycle and create controversy. Some are straight-up scams. Either way, they suck.

Stay safe out there and keep supporting your favorite authors with real comments. We need that genuine engagement now more than ever. 💜

Tagging all my mutuals @ruinationz and @turbotasticnumberone and @cartoon-cat7241 and @cru5h-cascades and @seleyaaaa and @mono-squamblo and @strayfelinez and @strangelilangel and @yukihirop and @rivertheemoo and @meatmedallion and @drownedsilverforever and @senpaipaws and @cartoonlover999 and @byronicmoron and @resolutelymadvermin and @wanka-wanky and @looksmokin and @justwatchedsometv and @oakwoodvida and @human-n0-l0ng3r and @glooberousgoon and @goddess-of-lov3 and @lucifersdog-luci and @casethecreep and @aoihibiki247 and and @klyju and @fleshistic and @golshi-sweetheart and @femmesagemoon222 and @4ggravatez and @resonanthideoutruin and @saddmyths and @homestuckyaoi413 and @blueloky and @divine-vxnity and @ace-productions7 and @fiberopticemoweeb666 and @cryptedlullaby and @3veryth1ngstays and @blossomletters and @alpheiaa and @juniizhq and @sapphicavocado and @bloodybigirl and @yanderehiro and @dnplicoricenutttt and @russkiy-american-dreams and @2catnip4me and @miracle-winkel and @mickyx-x and @biblicallyunhingedtheo and @the-only-good-ai and @prettirei and @unhinged-pink-espresso and @patchofglass

[intermilktea]

Remus and Regulus are prodigies on the piano. Those child prodigies who you look at and wonder whether it is a gift from God or a curse from the devil.

They were both students of Hope and for both, Hope always said to wait until graduation until they start entering competitions. Something they both were always very frustrated about. They were good, more than good, why couldn't they start competing now? They should start competing now. Winning now. Even if they did not win, it would be at least good practice. Performing needs practice too.

But Hope always refused. She wanted to protect them from that world for as long as she could. Until they became old enough.

Remus was 19 when he entered the Chopin competition.

Regulus was 18 when he entered the Chopin competition.

The biggest piano competition. The Olympics of the piano. This defined everything for them. If they won this, they secured their career.

It was now or never. If they failed now, they would never succeed again.

But only one could win. Whoever won now would be considered better than the other for the rest of their lives. Even if none of them won first prize. There was an order with the winners. First prize, second prize, third, fourth, specialized prizes.

It would finally be known who was really the best between them.

[intermilktea]

I am in such a flow in my writing but fucking Christmas needed to come by and family reunions too.

[intermilktea]

Regulus never enjoyed Christmas, it was always too many people, family business meetings disguised as family love reunion, uncles and aunties discussing his looks and his empty marriage finger, and his availability as the groom for their daughters for the year to come.

But at least he was familiar with it, and he knew what to expect.

The first time he spent Christmas with the Potters, he thought he was going to die. There were very few people compared to the Christamases he knew. Only James, his Parents, his brother, Pete, his family Remus, and his mother. They were all kindly hearted. No personal intention each time they spoke to Regulus. No plans of marrying him into the family. No obscure gossips about a hundredth uncle who was accused of financial fraud publicly.

Everyone wanted to spend time with him because of him.

And that was way too much.

He was tired. He felt the beginning of a panic attack, but couldn't tell anyone about it, because what? On Christmas Eve? He wasn't going to ruin Christmas eve because people were "too good for him". What a pussy.

So he just went to bed early, praying that it would go away, and hating himself even more for leaving everyone on Christmas eve.