Cosmic Funnies
Keni
almost home
Acquired Stardust
let's talk about Bridgerton tea, my ask is open
Three Goblin Art

Discoholic 🪩

pixel skylines
Aqua Utopia|海の底で記憶を紡ぐ

#extradirty
Mike Driver
art blog(derogatory)

No title available
AnasAbdin
Alisa U Zemlji Chuda

if i look back, i am lost

@theartofmadeline
"I'm Dorothy Gale from Kansas"

izzy's playlists!
Jules of Nature

seen from United States

seen from Australia
seen from United States

seen from United States

seen from United Kingdom

seen from Singapore
seen from Sweden
seen from Sweden

seen from Netherlands
seen from United States
seen from Italy

seen from Italy

seen from Malaysia

seen from United States

seen from United States

seen from Türkiye
seen from Portugal

seen from Germany
seen from United Kingdom
seen from France
@iteratedextras
A running theme in leftists circles is thinking that opinions which were maybe present 80 years ago are in fact universally held by everyone besides them.
"We hate poverty war and injustice, unlike the rest of you squares!"
to be fair this is a theme among everyone else's circles too
fred clark called it the "anti-kitten burning coalition," before he vanished inside his own progressive asshole. people see something wrong and have to convince themselves they are the only ones to be against it, that they are heroically standing up against it in the face of opposition (as in the example of a news article about some psycho burning kittens, where the comments section didn't seem aware that nobody else thought this was okay and all said things like "I can't believe that everyone thinks this is okay!")
respond to someone who believes something utterly hateful and absolutely foaming at the mouth insane that is nominally in support of some positive goal, and they will respond as if you had said "I oppose the nominally positive goal!"
leftists think they're the only ones against poverty and injustice, feminists think they're the only ones against rape, racists also think they're the only ones against rape, christians think they're the only ones against violence, libertarians think they're the only ones against tyranny, conservatives think they're the only ones against child molestation.
you see it a lot more from leftists because right now a lot of leftists are Maximally Political and make every place they go Maximally Political, but they aren't the only ones who think like this they're just the ones who don't shut up about it.
This is probably the silliest thing I’ve ever drawn, but I’m hoping someone else sees the vision 😂
anybody else miss the existence of actual paragraphs in fanfiction??
Business writing does this also. 💼
Here's why 👇✨
Ask yourself: why is Twitter more popular than Wordpress? 🐦
Why is Instagram more popular than Twitter? 📸
The fewer words something has, the more popular it is. 📈
People post "I ain't reading all that" about single paragraphs of six sentences. 📱
Why? ❓
The literacy rate is very low. 📉
Most people can't read Dickens. 📖
Most people think of reading a paragraph like running a marathon. 🏃
So mass-market business writing puts every sentence in its own paragraph. 👍
Sometimes with a picture at the end of every sentence. 🖼️
It's an accommodation. 🤯
The market is very liberal, you see. 😇
It breaks down barriers. 🤝
It empowers people. ✊
Even if you can only read at kindergarten level... 👶
...you can still be a businessman. 💼
if i met a genie and fixed the world and all its ills with my first two wishes, my third wish would be that sabrina carpenter would get gradually taller. she'd be in on it and think it was hilarious. we'd have a strong cap at 7 feet here, maybe an inch a week so people have time to theorize--let's not be ridiculous. but she'd still keep up the "ooh! im so little and small!" schtick. but shed be gradually getting taller. she'd be like 6'1" and still jumping for the microphone. and she'd never say anything about it. and if anyone asked shed act like she had no idea what they were talking about. and shed cheekily play into it a little bit but mostly still keep up the "ooh im so little and small" schtick. do you see my vision. do you get it
ok and so if i met a genie and fixed the world and all its ills in one wish i would do the sabrina carpenter thing second and third i would wish for all evidence of one random taylor swift song to disappear from the world once every month or so. taylor would have no memory of it. her fans would remember it and there would be an outcry over where it went (it's not even in concert videos anymore!) but taylor would have no memory of it
instead, all her brainspace spent on that song would be replaced with the vivid memories of roman gladiator, taylaurius velox. she's able to hide this at first, but her music begins to take on a gradually romaner and romaner tint. at first, people are like "damn, she's getting REALLY conservative, huh" and other people are like "wow, she's so deep, she knows what a rubicon is" but eventually travis kelce leaves her out of nowhere (he wasn't sure if dating someone possessed by a roman gladiator made him gay or not and anyway he was getting sick of being like "we're going to play the lions" and taylor being like "LIONS? WHERE?") and taylor publishes an entire brutus themed album about this betrayal and it's beginning to weird people out
and so eventually travis kelce is getting like, bomb threats sent to his family for leaving taylor and eventually he's like "okay, okay, i left her because she kept having all these vivid nightmares of gladatorial combat and she kept saying that football was giving her the ick because we never actually killed anybody for the glory of rome" and then he just gets more bomb threats because he left a struggling woman during a mental health crisis
and eventually taylor is writing music about her forbidden roman senator lover and her fanbase is either whittled WAY down or WAY up because people want to watch this trainwreck happen (or maybe she influences culture so hard that we're just all really into rome now) but she's being super cagey about the name of this roman senator. until. and now here's the twist:
weird al has been getting all of the same vivid memories of taylaurius velox. and he still has all his memories of her old songs. so he's writing all these detailed song parodies of taylor swift songs that don't exist anymore including specific details about their shared gladiatorial reality that taylor has never shared with anybody else. including that her lover's name was publius, and she's been calling him Poob for short
at this point a lot of original swifties are leaving. they could do the brutus stuff, but they really can't survive poob. taylor makes a clapping back at the haters song including the lyric "these bitches don't know publius" and it ends up all over all sorts of merch. there's a renewed archaeological interest in roman gladatorial combat
most importantly, the internet discourse is the best it's ever been. does this make taylor swift transmasc? is travis kelce problematic for leaving his fiancee while she gradually morphs into a roman gladiator? is this good queer representation? if taylaurius velox was a gay man, does that mean the gaylors were technically correct? is weird al morally wrong for capitalizing off of her music if she cant remember it anymore? was weird al sent by god to torment taylor swift?
anyway thats what id do if i met a genie
In the past year or so, it has occurred to me that a lot of think pieces around male loneliness or "dating in the bay area" uses a really warped version of "before you can love others, you must learn to love yourself", where complete self-actualisation becomes a prerequisite to dating. That's a really high bar.
Part of this is probably that the dating market in the Bay Area sucks for men, even rich men, so if you're 24 and you're making half a million year, you aren't safe from women dating twenty men like you and writing a think piece about this. You know, women who have their pick of 20 eligible bachelors are the real victims here!
Sometimes there are additional stipulations like "You're not supposed to derive life satisfaction from your work" or "You're not supposed to derive life satisfaction from your romantic relationships" or "You're not supposed to derive life satisfaction from art/your hobbies/travel/family".
I could completely turn this around. If you think you already have a perfect life and complete self-actualisation, and you only want to date then, and you think the other party should also have their life figured out, then first, that's one hell of a humblebrag, but second, it means that you don't have a lot of space in your life left to date somebody of make a life together, and it shows that you expect the other party to also not make that much space in their life for you.
by far the strangest part of the British government deciding to enact a sword hunt is that the policy they've put together is very clear about only banning "ninja swords" and "zombie-style knives." you're allowed to have a sword for fencing, or a machete for farm and garden work, or a zweihander for historical re-enactment purposes, but if you have a wakizashi your ass is fucking GRASS
like it is genuinely impossible for me to imagine a use case for this law that isn't just "being racist in a way that feels so outmoded it's almost quaint." you know people can kill each other with regular knives, right?
second-strangest part is that their definition of "ninja sword" includes certain kitchen knives but excludes odachi
god help you if your tuna knife is 4 inches too short
machetes are OK but if you doodle a little skull on it it WILL be imbued with the unholy spirit of KNIFE CRIME and you WILL be thrown in HMP Cocksarseworth FOREVER
You may have posted about this before, but im very curious about you saying "email was a mistake" because it's such a cemented part of online communication. Is it the technology?
Email became infrastructural in a way that it was never intended to be and wasn't designed for.
There is too much momentum toward email being the primary means of business communication that unless there is a massive technology shift we're unlikely to see wide adoption of an alternative and email takes up so much space in the IT space that it's hard to say what the alternative would be.
Much of what used to be email now happens in company chat apps, which I think is an improvement in many ways, but you chat with your coworkers in a way that you're unlikely to chat with a client or send a quote to a prospect.
A huge amount of effort goes into making email better, and making email systems talk to each other, and making email secure because it is so ubiquitous that you can't realistically ask people not to use it.
But it's fucking terrible and we're asking too much of a set of protocols that was supposed to send small, not-very-private, communications between academics.
Why can't you send big files via email? Because that's not what email is for.
Why is it a pain in the ass to send encrypted emails? Because that's not what email is for.
Why aren't your emails portable, and easy to move from one service to another? Because that's not what email is for.
Why are emails so easy to spoof? Because they were never meant to be used the way we use them so there was no reason to safeguard against that fifty years ago
It's like how social security cards were never meant to be used as one of your major super serious government IDs where all of your activity through all of your life is tracked, because if they knew they needed a system for that they probably would have built a better one in the first place.
Nobody who sat down and developed email looked more than half a century into the future and went "so people are going to be using this system to create identities to access banking and medical records and grocery shopping and school records so we'd better make sure that it's robust enough to handle all of that" because instead they were thinking "Neat! I can send a digital message to someone on a different computer network than the one that I am literally in the same building as."
We think of email as, like, a piece of certified mail that is hand delivered in tamperproof packaging to only the intended recipient who signs for it with their thumbprint and a retina scan when it is, instead, basically a postcard.
It would be absurd to try to do the things people do with email with postcards, and it's *nearly* as absurd to try to do them via email.
Email is 1970s technology. It's a relic from the time of mainframes, time sharing systems, and minicomputers, back when Unix was new and the Internet was in the planning stages.
In the 1980s, there was no DNS, the Internet was only trustworthy hosts and no normies. People connected to BBSs with modems, and that was different from the Internet. Email had to work with systems that weren't always connected to the Internet. Not just users/clients, whole mail servers were only intermittently connected to the Internet. Email had bang paths and satellite hosts to handle that. The usenet used a different protocol from email.
In the 1990s there were still BBSs but providers like AOL had their own internal networks. Web forums were displacing BBSs and the Usenet, everybody used windows, there was spam and viruses. Mail servers were all part of the Internet now, with DNS.
Now it's the 2020s. Every mail server needs DKIM, SSL, reverse DNS, SPF, and DMARC configured, or gmail won't talk to it. We haven't standardised mail encryption on GPG. We haven't standardised spam filtering. It would be cool if Thunderbird could automatically make sense of your gmail spam folder over IMAP. A lot of the design on email is so weird because it was designed for an Internet that hasn't existed since 1995.
It's not *that* difficult to design a new email protocol that fixes most of the pain points, but then you're the only one using an email2.0 address, and gmail has no incentive to interoperate with you.
To-cat-ata in B by sympawnies
I wanted someone to play it as soon as I saw it and they delivered
Sun Tzu is so fucking funny to me because for his time he was legitimately a brilliant tactician but a bunch of his insight is shit like "if you think you might lose, avoid doing that", "being outnumbered is bad generally", and "consider lying."
My personal favourite is his lengthy lecture on the subject of Supplies Being Very Important I Cannot Stress Enough The Importance Of Protecting Your Supply Lines But Also Supply Lines Are Expensive As Shit So Steal The Enemy’s Supplies At Every Opportunity.
via- @elidyce
One of the more important things to consider about any historical work is the audience it was published for. The Art Of War was aimed at fancy nobles high on philosophy with little practical military experience who were nonetheless leading armies.
Sun Tzu, after desperatly trying to explain extremely basic logic to a bunch of upper-class twits, basically sat down and wrote the most elaborate "As per my last email" ever
the art of war is tedious and irritating when you read it as like, immortal prose by the most brilliant man ever to kick ass. but it’s incredibly fucking funny when you realize that sun tzu had to write every single one of those entries because someone somewhere did not know this ahead of time and made a really, really expensive oopsie doodles.
so art of war is like... a risk assessment or SOP? I mean, that makes it much more funny when people reference it.
It’s very much an SOP. My favorite part is the last point: “when you are trying to light your enemy on fire, check the wind so you don’t light yourself on fire.” It’s so very much “don’t be stupid.”
So it's not my circus, but one of my monkeys did previously work there so i actually have a lot of opinion's on the circus' labor practices
I am this posts target demographic
discussion of AI on here is like if you said "I'm annoyed they put up a billboard that blocked part of my view" and someone said "yeah! also all billboards are made of baby skulls and going to destroy the world" and you said I don't think that's right and they called you a billboardbro and then you went to work and your boss said that they're replacing all forms of communication in your workplace with erecting billboards you have to read and if you say that that's probably not the best use case for billboards they said you just hate progress
I think you need to understand "I asked ChatGPT" as one of these influencer things.
We're moving in together
I asked ChatGPT
Our Trip to Dubai
Eating Dubai Chocolate in Dubai
I'M SORRY
One Month of Van Life
We Bought a Cybertruck
Renovating an Abandoned Amusement Park
Addressing the Allegations
My Experience in MrBeast's Celebrity Torture Challenge
We Broke Up
Raking US Fast Food Chains