Fruity Tumblings

[millenniallust4death]

I’m paying to force seven thousand strangers to see a photo of my late husband having fun with his dog. Tumblr Blaze is totally worth it. XD

[millenniallust4death]

Thank-you to all of my new Internet stranger friends for being so gracious about having my post shoved onto your dashboards. I loved reading all of your kind tags and comments! Both Martin and Bosco have been gone for several years now but for 24 hours, they felt very present in my life. I greatly appreciate this gift. ❤️

[xn3city]

Reblog to have your dashboard be visited by the spirit of joy that death can end but not erase.

[leavescrown]

Love that this is well beyond 7000 people now and still going

[millenniallust4death]

@leavescrown Exactly! It’s a beautiful gift. Martin and Bosco out there travelling around the Tumblr community, continually making new friends.

[millenniallust4death]

@sseanettles

#hello again martin and bosco!! sending you boys round for another go :)

Reading your tag made me laugh out loud. It’s like two old friends unexpectedly stopped by your porch for a quick visit. XD

[petermorwood]

I’ll always reblog Martin and Bosco when they splash across my dash, because of Reasons.

What’s loved, lives.

[lumichenart]

😭 Listen, they’re not tears…it’s hot lava pouring from my eyeballs okay. That’s how angry I am. 😡😫

[pankhearst]

the muppets, 1x01: “Pig Girls Don’t Cry.”

[couldnt-think-of-a-funny-name]

when I was a little kid at some point I got upset with my parents because I didn't have a crucifix in my bedroom and they did- I was like why do YOU get to be safe from vampires??? you're okay with me getting my blood sucked???? so we took a little trip to the catholic store but the one closest to us was run by a group of nuns that had been moved here from romania. I got a little baby pink cross and this sweet old nun was like 'aww, is this a baptism gift?' and I was like no. I need to be protected from vampires. and she immediately got SO serious and was like 'this is the best one we've got, you'll definitely be safe' and since she was literally from vampire land I was convinced she was like, van helsing. like the whole time my parents had been laughing about how cute my fear was but she literally Knew dracula and was taking my concerns seriously I held this over my parents for so long lmfao

[savannahlemur]

No No No! 🙀 Don’t take your hands. I feel so comfy. 💕🐊

[johnthedragon]

HOW CAN SOMETHING BE THIS CUTE

[anatombombatallhours]

But really, though 🥺

[bogleech]

I made a post like that! Yeah if a wild lizard sees you it’s going to get scared. This lizard is not scared. It knows the human is another living thing, which it feels absolutely safe with. That is fucking MAGICAL.

[only-tiktoks]

[meantfortheshore]

[moremetalthanyourmom]

Okay but after seeing this I started doing it too and it’s amazing how many men I’ve run into bc they expected me to move

[youcangofindatree-deactivated20]

Gotta try it

[clevermanka]

I work (and walk) on a college campus. I’ve lost count of how many men I’ve smacked shoulders with.

[emmagrant01]

Recently, I was standing outside my son’s classroom waiting to talk to his teacher. I stood on one side of the hallway, not even close to the center. At some point, a man came walking along. I was standing right in his path, but the hallway was empty, so I logically expected him to swerve around me. Instead he kept walking right toward me, got to me, and stopped, as if waiting for me to get out of his way. I didn’t; I just smiled politely at him. He finally walked around me, clearly annoyed that I hadn’t leapt out of his manly path.

Now I’m wishing I’d leapt aside, taken off my jacket and laid it on the floor before him, then bowed deeply and said, “My Liege!”

[mercurialkitty]

I also work at a college campus. I smack shoulders sometimes, but I find that if I stare straight ahead and follow the advice below, people get the heck out of the way.

[songbirde108]

Honestly this post changed how I carry myself when walking alone in public, or in a situation where I’m the one leading. People definitely move for the murder gaze.

[onethingconstant]

Confirmed. I once had to rush back inside a convention hall as the con was closing in order to a retrieve a sick friend’s medication, and I didn’t understand why people in the crowd were jumping out of my way (literally—one guy vaulted a table) until I realized I was dressed as the Winter Soldier and doing the Murder Walk because that’s just how I walk in those boots. I got the meds, got out, and made a mental note.

I repeated the experiment later, wearing the boots but otherwise my usual clothing and mimicking the expression I thought I’d had at that moment. People parted like I was Charlton Heston.

I now wear that style of boots whenever possible. I recently had a man do a double-take as I walked by and ask me, politely, where I had served because I “looked like a soldier.” I’m not current or former military. I was wearing a flowy purple peasant top and looked as un-soldierlike as possible.

Moral of the story: wear comfortable shoes, square your shoulders, and walk like you’ve been sent to murder Captain America.

[naeonnoir]

WALK LIKE YOU’VE BEEN SENT TO MURDER CAPTAIN AMERICA

[retroasgardian-deactivated20180]

[spiduhgirl]

It’s called the Murder Strut.

[elegantmess100]

IT’S BACK!!!!!! I was searching for this to show my daughter the other day and couldn’t find it. I’m so glad IT’S BACK!! I will always reblog the Murder Strut!!

[b3gayd0crim3]

A guy on a bike went around me because he could tell I had no intention of moving. Thanks to this post.

[linkedsoul]

One day and I bumped into a guy while doing the Murder Strut and he apologized to me even though I was the one who had bumped into him.

It works wonders.

[noping-out-deactivated20241117]

In case you were wondering, yes you can do this in a wheelchair. Same look in your eyes and let ‘em know you will run them down. Just picture yourself in a sports car accelerating towards someone with the intention of flattening them.

If there’s anything more satisfying than watching Abled men leap out of my way when they realize I’m not moving for them, I can’t think of it atm.

[chasing-asterion]

[seperis]

Walk like you’ve been sent to murder Captain America.

Wheel like you’re gonna win the Indy 500 and don’t care how.

Your crutches are short swords; walk like you can see them buried in the bodies of anyone who crosses (in front of) you.

Tumblr: teaching women how to be Moses and part the fucking Red Sea with the power of their minds.

[taraljc]

I had never seen these updates to the Patriarchy Chicken Game before and they are all a goddam DELIGHT

[marithlizard]

Patriarchy Chicken and The Murder Strut, dance names for the new millenium. 

[gossip-girl-of-middleearth]

OH MY GOD I HAD BARELY SCROLLED DOWN THIS POST AND WAS GONNA SAY “JUST TAKE SOME ADVICE FROM ME THAT I LEARNT FROM AN OLD TUMBLR POST ABOUT WALKING LIKE THE WINTER SOLDIER FROM YEARS AGO” BUT THEN IT TURNED OUT TO BE THIS POST

I first discovered this a few years ago when I was an insecure 14-year-old, and since then I indeed do the “murder strut” and staunch everywhere I go, literally works wonders

[cade-the-god]

murder strut works wonders in the airport and school.

[everythingfox]

Worth a try

(via)

[babyanimalgifs]

This seal relaxing halfway under water 

(via)

[astrodidact]

[aenariasbookshelf]

See that picture above? That’s a close up of my great grandmother’s immigration papers when she first came to the US back in the early 20th century. But my great grandma’s information isn’t the important part here. The important part is that line in the middle there about how they arrived in the country.

And how ‘stowaway’ is a legitimate, valid option to select.

So yeah. They absolutely just showed up, and that part of immigration history needs to be talked about a lot more.

[drek-odradek-deactivated2022031]

REMINDER THAT TRAVEL VISAS AS WE KNOW THEM TODAY WERE INVENTED IN THE 1930S TO KEEP JEWISH REFUGEES OUT OF COUNTRIES THAT DID NOT WANT AN ‘INFLUX’ OF THEM, THEREBY FACILITATING THEIR GENOCIDE :)))))

read What is A Refugee for more history. Educate yourselves.

[grad-school-fool]

Why is Poison Ivy always so hypersexualized she’s basically a magic farmer she should be wearing muddy boots and complaining about how corn subsidies are killing agriculture as well as flora biodiversity in the US

[more-muppets]

They want her to be a forest nymph instead of the stem field eco-terrorist feminist that she is

[ames-draws]

…I had to draw it.

[yay855]

It also fits because she’s a lesbian, and lesbians wear plaid jackets.

[rikmach]

To be fair, the in-universe explanation is so she can attract rich men who devastate the environment to her so she can murder them.

[yay855]

…that would only work the first few times.

[rikmach]

I think you’re underestimating the stupidity of horny men.

[theintrovertnation]

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Art By Toastybumblebee

[watermelon-shark-rock]

I feel very strongly about this

[qwiirk]

* D E E P I N H A L E *

yes

[memoriesofaparasomniac]

I love the rain

[nogthegingerninja]

I love the rain too

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

Hey Gaudy did you know that clowns can paint their likeness on an egg and have it sent to the Clown Gallery, therefore patenting their signature look to keep other clowns from copying them?

i HAVE actually heard of the Clown Egg Register. 

for those not in the know, there’s a museum of clowning that helps enforce the unofficial rule that no two clowns can have the same face markings. thus started the practice of painting the markings onto eggs, as a means of record keeping. 

anyway, yes, clowns use eggs to copyright their makeup

[leeisnotokay]

Taken out how?

Gaud taken out how?

[autijacen]

For dinner, of course. All you can eat.

[beyond-the-starless-sea]

No matter where it leads, I promise you that it will be exactly where you should go…

[feministism]

[charlesoberonn]

“I wish ancient people preserved their writing and artifacts better” I write in electronic signals on a piece of hardware that can’t retain its efficacy for more than a few decades.

[charlesoberonn]

Time to laser-print my entire blog on titanium plates and bury them underground.

[jusdefruit]

I was just reading in Tyson Yunkaporta’s Sand Talk about how the introduction of writing changed the way oral tradition was used. Maybe the best back up isn’t writing but oral tradition.

[yesterdaysprint]

The Evening Star, Washington DC, October 16, 1918

[septic-dr-schneep]

This aged well

[injuries-in-dust]