This is beautiful. And on the topic of sleepovers and kids getting stuck in uncomfortable situations: My mom and I had a code, ever since my first sleepover. I would always call home to say goodnight, and if I asked “How is the cat doing?”, it meant that I wasn’t comfortable and I wanted her to pick me up. I did use this code a few times, and whenever I did, my mom came up with the excuses for me. I was never stuck at a sleepover I didn’t want to be at - and as a child with anxiety and social phobia, this was a great system.
Once, I was at a friend’s birthday party, and they began to play strip poker and 7 minutes in heaven and immature stuff like that. I am the biggest virgin that you’ve ever known, so I pretended like my phone was vibrating, punched in my mom’s speed dial, and when she answered, I said “Hey mom, whatcha need? *Pause* oh, okay. So I have to come home now? Yeah, sorry, I’ll clean my room right when I get there. *pause* ten minutes? Okay, that works. See ya.” and she understood exactly what I wanted, and she came and picked me up, and even scolded me in front of my friends for ‘not cleaning my room’. I’ve used this so many times, it isn’t funny. My mom is so understanding each time.
And now I must hug my mother and post 5 million mom appreciation posts.
I really think hospitals and doctors that work with pregnancy and pediatricians need to make more literature available for how to, ya know, work with kids? Because the more conversations we have about spanking (and how it’s ineffective and harmful and does more bad than good), the more I realize that a lot of people don’t know the alternatives. Or like, anything about child development or where misbehavior stems from.
So, as someone who went through childhood development classes in college, works with kids for a living, and knows multiple people who specialized in childhood education, here are some pointers when you are working with kids:
1. Model emotional response for kids. Children are learning how to recognize and respond to their own emotions. All the way up through high school, children’s brains are still developing, and the emotions they are learning to process become more complex. So with really young kids, the easiest way to help them with this is to model emotional self awareness and self care.
“Oh wow, mommy is feeling angry because the cat made a mess. I’m going to clean this mess and then go sit in my room in the quiet for a short break so I feel better.”
“You know, I am feeling very sad about not going to the park because it is raining. I bet some hot chocolate and a book would make me feel better.”
”Huh, I’m feeling kind of cranky and hungry, but daddy won’t be home for dinner for another hour. I bet I’ll feel better if I eat a little piece apple while we wait.”
2. Understand what causes child frustration and work to preempt it.
-Transitions (from one activity to another, getting in the car, etc) can be stressful, especially if the activity or location they are leaving is fun. Give kids a warning when this is going to happen. With young kids, give them about 5-15 minutes of warning (”10 minutes until we are going to leave the park and go home. Do your last thing.”), with older kids, just give them a time frame. (We are can play at McDonalds for 30 minutes, but then we have to go grocery shopping, ok?)
Not being able to communicate what they want to is frustrating. Babies can learn simplified baby sign language months before they are verbal. Kids may not know the words for what they are trying to say. Be patient and help them find the right words. On a similar note, don’t ignore kids. If you really can’t respond to their question right away because of something else, at least tell the “Yes, I heard your question. I’ll answer you as soon as I’m done talking on the phone.”
Not being able to make choices or having too much choice can be overwhelming. Give kids a limited, reasonable selection of choices. “Do you want apple slices or juicy pears on the side for lunch?” is much better than “What do you want with your sandwich?” or just giving them apple slices. “Do you want to give grandpa a hug or a high five?” is better than demanding they hug grandpa right away.
3. Understand that kids are people to. They will get hungry, tired, an annoyed just like adults do. Sometimes you have to be flexible and give them time to self care. Talk to them, explain things to them, let them be people and not just dolls. “Because I said so” is really unhelpful for a growing kid. “We can’t buy Fruit Loops today because we are already getting Frosted Flakes. We only need one cereal at a time.” is going to do you a lot more favors. “Don’t pick up the glass snow globe. It belongs to grandma and can break easy. She would be sad if we broke it on accident.” is better than “don’t touch that.”
And look, no parent is perfect. No baby sitter, no teacher, no care taker is going to be awesome all the time. And no kid is going to be perfect. They will cry and have tantrums, and not be able to tell you what they need, and be stubborn sometimes. Sometimes they need space, or quiet time. Sometimes they need attention and validation.
But kids learn from every interaction they have, so adults who yell and hit and insult children when they misbehave raise kids who yell and hit and insult others when they feel like they’ve been wronged.
Ten Mistakes New Herb Gardeners Make (and How to Avoid Them!)
Mistake 1: Growing from seed. When you first start out trying to grow fresh herbs, I recommend you begin by trying to grow from seedlings rather than planting your own seeds. These great little starter plants are widely available in grocery stores in the late spring. For the same price as a packet of fresh herbs from the produce section, you can buy your own little starter plant. Lots can go wrong in the seed to seedling transition (including not thinning out plants properly), so its probably best to begin by skipping that complicated task or you are in danger of washing out before you really begin.
Mistake 2: Starting with the wrong varieties. I recommend you start by trying to grow fresh basil. It is the perfect trainer herb. First, basil grows quickly, allowing you to observe the effects of your care more easily. Second, basil leaves wilt visibly when not watered enough, but recovers well if you water the wilted plant. This makes basil a great ‘canary in the mineshaft’ to help you figure out how much water is enough.
Mistake 3: Watering herbs like houseplants. Instead, water herbs a moderate amount every day. While some houseplants flourish with one solid watering per week, most delicate herbs require moderate and regular watering. This is particularly true during hot summer months. If you have good drainage at the bottom of your pot (at least a drainage hole, possibly rocks beneath the soil), it will be difficult to water herbs too much.
Mistake 4: Not cutting early and often. As a novice gardener, it may seem like your puny little plant just isn’t ready for a trip to the barber, but then you will find yourself sitting there wishing for leaves without much success. Again, basil is a great herb to practice pruning. As with all herbs, you want to cut the herb just above a set of growing leaves. With basil, when you cut the plant that way, the originally trimmed stem will no longer grow. However, two new stems will grow around the original cutting, creating a “V” shape (see the photo above, can you spot the Vs?). If you don’t trim basil aggressively, it will continue to grow straight up, and become too tall and top-heavy. Making your first trim approximately 3-4” above the soil produces a nice sturdy plant. Of course you want to be sure you are always leaving a few good sturdy leaves on the plant (see below). As it continues to grow, continue to prune it approximately every 3-4" for a nice solid plant. I like to let it grow for some time and then cut back to within 2-3 inches of the original cut. After only a few early trial cuts, this usually makes for a nice clipping with plenty of basil to use for a pizza.
Mistake 5: Taking the leaves from the wrong place. When you are just starting out it seems to make so much sense to pick off a few big leaves around the bottom of the plant, and let those tender little guys at the top keep growing. Wrong. Leave those large tough old guys at the bottom alone. They are the solar panels that power your herb’s growth. Once your plant is big enough to sustain a decent harvest, keep on taking from the top, as you have been when you were pruning. That way you get all those tender new herbs that are so tasty, and your plant gets to keep its well developed solar power system in place. Plus, if you pluck from the base and leave the top intact, you get a tall skinny plant that will flop over from its own weight (and yes, I know this from experience). When you pluck from the top, instead of clipping off just below a pair of leaves, you want to clip off just above a pair of leaves. It is a bit counter-intuitive as a novice, but trust me it works. The place where the leaf joins the stem is where new growth will occur when your plant sends off new stems in a V.
Mistake 6: Letting your plants get too randy. If you are pruning regularly, this may never become an issue, but unless you are growing something for its edible flowers, be sure to cut back herbs before they start growing flowers. My friend once brought me to her backyard garden and pointed, frustrated, at her wimpy, small basil plants. “I just keep tending them, but they don’t even produce enough leaves to put on a salad!” she lamented. I pointed to the glorious stalk of flowers at the top of each plant, “That’s your problem” I explained. Because herbs are kind of like college boys: if you give them half a chance, they will focus all their energy on procreation and neglect growth. If you want leaves, keep cutting off the little flower buds whenever you find them (see photo above), and it will encourage your plant to focus on growing more leaves.
Mistake 7: Using tired soil with no nutrients. Tired soil that has been sitting in your garden or lawn for ages often looks grey and a little depressing. Would you want to grow in that stuff? Give your plants a dose of the good stuff and they’ll thank you for it. I grow my herbs in a combination of potting soil, used coffee grounds (with a near-neutral PH, available for free at Starbucks), and organic compost. If I have some on hand, I also throw in crushed egg shells. Those without access to compost (and no deep commitment to organic growing) may find Miracle grow useful. My momma swears by it for tomatoes. A diluted solution of Miracle grow occasionally can help many herbs flourish.
Mistake 8: Getting in a rut. There is an element to passion about herb gardening. In order to be good at it, you need to feel rewarded. So don’t stick too long with one or two herbs just because they work. Branch out to a few other basic herbs that you will use regularly in your kitchen. There are few things more rewarding as an urban foodie than being able to pop out to the fire escape to clip fresh herbs to use in my cooking. Once you have become comfortable with basil, I recommend moving on to try growing oregano, mint, rosemary and thyme. All are regularly useful herbs in the kitchen, and all are relatively easy to grow. You will notice that rosemary cleaves after cutting in a somewhat similar way to basil, but grows much more slowly, so the effect is difficult to notice. Some plants also respond to clipping by throwing out more full leaves at their base. I have long wanted to grow cilantro but have not had much luck with it.
Mistake 9: You mean there’s more than one kind of mint?When choosing herbs, read the label carefully. For example, there are two main varieties of oregano: Mediterranean and Mexican. Mediterranean oregano is the more common variety, and what you likely own if you have conventional dried oregano in your cupboard. I have Mexican oregano growing on my back fire escape. I love Mexican oregano in spicy dishes, for making beans from scratch, and often use it in tomato dishes where I don’t want the flavor to seem too much like marinara. Similarly, there are many different kinds of mint. You don’t want to be thinking of the pungent spearmint plant and accidentally take home the much more subtle (and not mojito savvy) applemint by mistake.
Mistake 10: Feed me Seymour! If you are planting in soil instead of pots, take care that your cute little herb seedling doesn’t become a giant plant that takes over your garden. A word of warning for oregano and mint: both can be voracious growers. If you are planting outside in a garden, rather than in pots, you may want to consider potting these herbs and then burying the pots in the ground. This will add a measure of control to the root systems of these herbs, which can otherwise take over a garden and strangle nearby neighbors. When in doubt, check out wikipedia, they usually are careful to point out which herbs are in danger of overwhelming your garden.
Some really useful info here if you’re new to herb gardening.
Because sometimes what you need most is a self-assembling origami penguin, aka The Penguin Bomb. This wonderful clever DIY origami sculpture was designed by Japanese paper artist Haruki Nakamura. The Penguin Bomb starts out flat, but when dropped on a hard surface a 3D penguin pops up and stands on its own.
Here’s the Penguin Bomb in action in slow motion:
And here it is in real-time:
Currently the original Penguin Bomb is only available Japan, but girigiriou created this video tutorial for how to make your own.
But wait, there’s more! girigiriou also created this awesome wooden version of the Penguin Bomb:
so you guys are facing down yet another global warming summer and as an american i feel entitled to barge over and give you a lot of advice about how to live your life. also i’m used to surviving 90-110 degree summers (32—43 celsius) with no ac. so here we go.
you need to drink a lot of water. on average you should be drinking about two liters. on hot days, double that.
fill plastic water bottles halfway up and stick them in your freezer. take them out once they’ve frozen and fill the rest up with water, drink the water, fill it up again, and carry it around with you until it’s time to get the next ice bottle. also you can put the icy end against your throat or over your chest for maximum refreshment.
consider making a lot of sun tea. get big glass jars or a pitcher. put a bunch of your preferred teabags in it with some sugar. if you want to be an american southerner, your tea should be green or black and your sugar amount should be enough to kill a child. if you want to be sane, put in as little sugar as you can get away with so it’s not dehydrating, and stick with herbal teas because the last thing you want during the heat of the day is a caffeine boost. leave your tea on a windowsill. after a few hours it’s steeped and you can put it in the fridge. tadaaa.
fruit juice, soda pop, beer, and a lot of sports drinks like gatorade all dehydrate you, and in really hot weather they’re dangerous because people will drink them instead of water. drink an equal amount of water as anything with sugar. see prior point about sun tea.
when you sweat you lose salt. so don’t feel bad about eating some junk food.
freeze grapes. eat the grapes. repeat.
get a hat with a brim. baseball caps are ok but wide brimmed hats are better because they shadow the back of your neck and that’s one less thing to have to worry about.
don’t wear knit caps. just… no.
you don’t get more sunburned because it’s hot, you get more sunburned because when it’s hot you wear less clothes. so don’t freak out.
if you don’t have AC you can put a bowl of ice behind a fan. this creates a swamp cooler, by pulling the air over the ice. also, put on a wet t-shirt and sit in front of it, and you’ll cool further by evaporation.
speaking of evaporation, watch out if it’s humid. you don’t cool down from sweating as much when the air’s already saturated. drink more water, have more salt, and change your shirt a lot.
heatstroke is serious shit, and kids and the elderly are prone to it. but whatever your age, if you feel nauseous, headachy, or short of breath, the heat’s getting to you. pour your water bottle over your head and go sit in the shade. keep an eye on friends and family as well.
if someone stops sweating when they’re still out in the heat, that’s serious business and get them medical treatment as soon as possible. it’s a case of dehydration and/or heatstroke.
Other things that freeze really well, a short list:
Orange juice! Other fruit juices too, but I tend to have best results with oj or cider. Pour some into an empty ice-cube tray, let them freeze, and the result is slightly-flaky frozen goodness. This is also an easy way to make homemade popsicles–put a sheet of aluminum foil over top of the tray and stick toothpick/popsicle sticks in so the juice freezes around them.
Grapes were mentioned. Grapes are TRUE.
NOT SODAS. Do not freeze sodas! They explode.
Strawberries! These can be hard to find cheap, especially outside of strawberry season, and I don’t know about their availability outside of my part of the US, but if you can get them they’re great frozen in your water. Freeze-dry strawberries by laying them out on a tray or sth in the freezer, and then when they’re frozen just put them in a bag to conserve space.
Other general tips:
Fruit in water is amazing when you’re someone like me who doesn’t like water’s lack of taste. Strawberries and mint leaves are fairly traditional, but basically anything you like will work. there are lots of combos online.
If you have a blender or a food processor, smoothies are a good way to eat something when you’re too hot to function. Fruit+ice+milk+yogurt is pretty traditional.
Have sunscreen. Make sure you don’t have any skin reactions to the sunscreen. If your sunscreen has fragrance, make sure you can deal with the fragrance when it’s constantly on your face in heat.
Speaking off: sunscreen is not just for arms/shoulders. Put sunscreen on your face, especially nose/cheekbones/forehead. Put sunscreen on the tops of your ears! If your hair has a tight part, try to put sunscreen there if you don’t wear a hat (scalp burns are PAINFUL). Put sunscreen on your legs, especially the backs of your calves. Put sunscreen on any visible parts of your feet.
Wear loose clothing if you can, especially if you’re wearing long sleeves. Any constrictions on your breathing feel much worse in the heat.
If you need to cool down quick, run cold water over your wrists (or put ice cubes on them maybe?). This is a trick they taught us in gymnastics class but it works just as well on hot days.
When you start getting that feeling like you’ve adapted to the heat, like it’s not bad, like you could just stay where you are for hours and hours, even get a blanket, and maybe you feel like you’re zoning out a little, it’s time to reconsider, move around, have something cool to drink.
And it can be hard to remember to eat when it’s so hot, for some reason. Cold food in small portions is generally easiest to manage. But remember to eat food with a lot of salt, a lot of potassium, a lot of vitamins. I can’t believe bananas aren’t on this post. My god, get your potassium, you’ll feel SO much better. If you’re eating something salty and it tastes unusually, amazingly good, it’s because you’re running low on salt, so keep eating it.
and seriously yeah keep an eye on people like kids and the elderly and anyone who’s under your care. ask them how they’re feeling if they’re able to tell you, and if not, try to see if they’re looking unusually unfocused, breathing too hard, haven’t had anything to drink in a while, etc.
If you bind, be even more careful about how long you bind and pay even more attention to your binder’s effects on your body.
sometimes there’s nothing else for it but to just fill a bathtub with cool water and get in. Seriously, it can be so helpful. Also, showers. Showers are good.
also take care of your dogs I don’t know anything about dogs but be careful for them! maybe look up some tips.
also could anyone who even thinks about reblogging this from me to make fun of brits, pls stop?? when it gets hot here it’s kind of awful bc A/C is rare and they’re really not used to this kind of heat. if you add any sort of teasing if u reblog this for me i will find u and push you
Seriously, air conditioning is basically not a think here. And most of our houses are designed to trap heat. Our old people’s homes are not air conditioned. Our hospitals are not air conditioned. When we have unusual heat waves people die.
If you find yourself shaking, feeling dizzy, or feeling cold in the middle of a heat wave, sit yourself down in the shade and sip water (don’t chug, you’ll make yourself throw up) until you feel normal again. These are some of the first warning signs of heat exhaustion and ignoring them is dumb.
If you’re at a sports practice or being otherwise active in the heat and you recognize these or other symptoms of heat exhaustion/heat stroke, don’t let yourself be pressured into playing through it. Listen to your body and take care of it.
I have so many British buddies, you guys, pay serious attention to the tips up above. For those who don’t know, I live in Australia, one of the driest and hottest places on earth, and we get those same temperatures that the first poster quoted, hotter in the centre of Australia. I didn’t know half of those tips, and I’ll likely utilise them next summer myself.
Please, take care in the heat, I’ll make sure to reblog this later on when it gets closer to you guys’ summer, but please, take this seriously. Even with us being used to the heat the way we are, we still have fatalities because people do not properly look after themselves.
also, since everyone always forgets – if you’re wearing sandals or flipflops, PUT SUNSCREEN ON YOUR TOES. Those little piggies are not used to being grilled, and sunburnt feet isn’t fun. Actually, suncreen everywhere (nape of neck, all over your ears, right down to your figures. Put your sunscreen on before getting dressed, and let it soak in, so you don’t get burn lines along the hems, and re-apply FREQUENTLY. In fact, if you don’t regularly use sunscreen, read this helpful FAQ
As someone with skin cancer, let me tell you, DON’T LET YOURSELF GET BURNED!
/psa
another point to cool off is behind the ears, press an ice cube there when your head feels hot
lie down on the floor to refresh, if your house is all wooden floors and carpets, the floors won’t be fresh but where there are tiles (like the bathroom) would work
and yo, if u have towels, u should soak ‘em in cold water or a tub of ice if one is accessible, and just wear it around your neck
also, the sunscreen thing is rly important
even if you don’t think you need it, you can still get sunburnt and have ur skin peeling, and that’s no fun.
If you have access to multiple floors, it can be a good idea to set up an air mattress or even just pile up some blankets on the floor and to sleep on the lowest floor you can. Heat rises, and even with a/c we used to sleep on the ground floor when we were in an old farmhouse. It’s also not a bad idea to wear loose, light colored clothing that’s a little more covering, since this helps keep the sun off of you and makes it easier for sweat to evaporate, which both help keep you cool. Idk if anyone’s mentioned this, but you can tie up loose hair in a bun or braid to keep it from sticking to your neck. It’s a small but quick thing that can make you feel a bit better, just make sure to keep the back of your neck in the shade and sunscreen.
If you plan on lying on your stomach in the sun SUNSCREEN THE BOTTOMS OF YOUR FEET. Really sunscreen every 1-2 hours and make sure you apply at least 15 min before going outside.
I like sticking my top sheet and pillowcase in the freezer about 30 min or more before going to bed. And cold wet hair is a blessing for a while if you have longer hair
About clothing: If you can wear loose clothes made of 100% cotton or linen, wear them! A lot of synthetic fibers (I’m looking at you, polyester) will stick to your skin like plastic wrap.
Also, FROZEN BANANAS. Frozen bananas are excellent. And having something salty to snack on, because it will make you thirsty and remind you to drink water, as well as replacing any salt you lose by sweating. Just keep a bag of chips (er, American-style chips, I mean) or pretzels handy and munch on them.
I get super dizzy in the heat- not related to dehydration or heat stroke or dangerous things, it’s just a thing with my body. If you’ve figured out that you do the same (and aren’t suffering heat stroke) it can be a pain. Best thing I’ve found to counter that is rest my head between my knees or on a table or whatever, face down, and put something frozen on the back of my neck. A frozen towel or ice pack or whatever. Like all the other cool down points people mention are good but I’ve found that to be the best one to counteract dizziness is the back of the neck at the base of the skull.
Also, when you’re hydrating — you ARE hydrating, right? Per the above recommendations? — don’t chug down an entire liter of water at once. Your body can only absorb so much so fast, no matter how thirsty you are, and you’ll just pee out the extra. Drink slowly and throughout the day.
Put a little fruitjuice in your water, not just because it tastes better, but because when your body thinks that you’re eating food, it absorbs the water better. I use a slice of lemon, it does the trick.
Please, please, PLEASE be careful about the cool bathtub/shower advice. You might want to wait a bit after being outdoors before you try this. There was an incident with a sports player (football maybe?) Where he did something similar, only to drop dead because of the sudden decrease in body temperature. Cool off first, then expose yourself slowly to cool (not freezing) water if you must.
If you’re like me and struggle to sleep in hot weather, wet your sheet til it’s damp (not sopping) and sleep with that on you and a fan going - home made evaporative air conditioner! (I’m Aussie, and learnt that trick living through summer for the first time without an aircon).
Something good to note is a sun cream called P-20. This shit is the bomb. This stuff goes on and looks like oil, it is designed so it does not wash off. You only have to apply it twice a day at the most and can only be removed with soap and scrubbing. In the 40°C summer in Turkey I spent all day, everyday in that motherfucking ocean and not once did I get burned. That shit is a god send, use it. Its a little expensive but is worth it and lasts absolutely ages.
Usually the weather is very inconsistent here in Nova Scotia but over the last couple of years we’ve had terrible heat waves with humidity.
It’s nice to have this post to refer to during those times.
Especially think of your pets! I don’t know a lot of tips for them but ice cubes in their water helps a little. That and putting a towel in the freezer for a bit and then putting it on the floor for them to lie on. I did this for my long haired kitty during our last heat wave and it seemed to have helped! Especially when it was close to the fan.
Also they kind of recommend not having your windows open during heatwaves because it just lets the hot air in and if you have the fan running, it’s just circulating that hot air. I’m not sure how valid this is but again, seemed to have worked during the last heat wave we had.
Sports drinks and fruit juice DO NOT DEHYDRATE YOU for the love of GOD if you only have juice, drink juice. Sports drinks are literally made for people who need to get hydrated. Soda, tea and coffee are also fine - yes caffeine is a mild diuretic but you will still retain the vast majority of whatever you drink which is much, much better than not drinking anything (drinking plain water is still best).
Please do not take that advice. If you’re out in the heat you can drink juice, coffee and soda. Please do not pass up liquids because they aren’t pure water, this is not accurate advice.
Please do not spread that advice around, either. It can literally make someone sick or get them killed.
When the ad shows you something you’re interested in, you click it, and it opens two tabs with one being a clear phishing scam and the other for some fuck app
I have been a cat owner my whole life and I literally never knew that tiger lilies and stargazers were also highly toxic to cats. Even drinking the water from the vase that lilies are in can kill the cat! I brought in a tiger lily from our yard today and just thought to look it up and found out (and of course removed the lily from our house as soon as I saw). How scary!
