Trust Me

I'm hilarious

[orcboxer]

I have just combined all rice in the world into a single rouse

[smoothjazzdigit]

Have you guys seen that clip

Go off Kermit

[juliathefacesofevil]

we're just normal men

[oddjoblin]

Why the heck is this dude trying to confirm if the frog puppet is hetrosexual???

[karnalesbian]

assessing the situation before he shoots his shot

[defilerwyrm]

Happy Pride to Kermit the Frog, questioning king

[catchymemes]

[theunfairfolk]

in elementary school i figured out how to customize the classroom desktop's autocorrect to make Word change whole sentences. this made it appear almost like the computer was responding to you. you could, for example, type in "where did i put my keys", hit enter, and watch it switch to "you put them under the couch". this was before chatbots, and we were all 9 so i considered it closer to a magic trick than a tech one.

i immediately scripted out a dialogue exchange between me and a girl who had died by the swings (classic). i invited another student over and told them i had found a ghost, then proceeded to type out the pre-scripted exchange. i was immediately pulled into the counselors office. the kicker was that none of the adults could figure out how i did it. i had to show them the menu and everything.

[theunfairfolk]

important detail i forgot to add: the swing ghost wanted blood sacrifices from the students. in my defense it was "only a few drops".

[toastyglow]

headstrong and foolhardy medieval king: never shall I bend the knee!!!

physical therapist: okay well if you keep lifting with your back you are just going to get hurt again your majesty

[goth-queen]

[bendingsignpost]

Is there Anything Better in cat wrangling than meeting The Cat Who Will Not Be Pet, putting in copious work for several hours to Achieve Pets, meeting the cat again several MONTHS later for only the second time, and immediately being allowed to pet again?

No.

No, there is not.

[gay-irl]

Lesbian erasure

[guiltfactory]

[guiltfactory]

[dreadwedge]

As a transsexual woman 👩 who has had multiple experiences ‼️ I have found 🔎 that the biggest block of cheese 🧀 is usually the one ☝️ that has the largest size 📈

[dreadwedge]

mature content

[helenvaughans]

[zitasaurusrex]

[inthesensethat]

[truetgirl]

Car Trunk vs Car Boot: A clear win for US English, trunk was already a thing in which you stored items, frequently for transport.

Crisps vs Chips: I gotta admit, the Brits have this one. They're thin slices of potato that have been made crispy. No chipping of any materials involved.

Car Park vs Parking Lot: Equally matched. What's a car park? A place to park cars. What's a parking lot? An otherwise empty lot where you can park.

Elevator vs Lift: Both equally fail to address that the damn thing also goes down.

[saltoncity]

girl is that a knife in your hand or are you jerking off your sharp detachable penis in my stomach

[depsidase]

[charl0ttan]

huge fan of the depth of a good purple but another area that draws me is definitely around aquamarine/turquoise/seafoam. you can not go wrong once the green starts getting just a tinge more blue. a gal could certainly do worse than to pull over there and stay a while

[charl0ttan]

something earth shattering going on here

[emily84]

this is why one of my favorite all-time paintings is Ship in Stormy Seas by Ivan Aivazovsky... he was really onto something there

a close up to just... light shining through those waves, makes me feel faint with exhilaration every time

[is-there-a-boat]

THERE IS A BOAT BY IVAN AIVAZOVSKY!!

[clayandsorcery]

Ivan Aivazovsky could paint glowing water. One of the GOATs for sure.

[wholesome-animal-images]