Ask Me About Wanted: Dead (2023)

Smoke - 24 - Agender - Too Many Diagnoses With "Chronic" in Them

[kiesen]

Hey! The name's Smoke, but you can call me Kiesen too. Only she/her and they/them pronouns please.

I am intersex, agender, disabled, an aroace lesbian, and occasionally a werewolf. I am also an adult. I do not mind if minors follow/interact with me, and I keep things fairly PG-13 on here, but keep in mind that I occasionally reblog blood/gore/horror and things that are slightly suggestive. If any of that makes you uncomfortable, you are welcome to avoid/unfollow/block me. Curate your online experience! I am currently taking a break from school, but I have an associate's degree in general science and a bachelor's in mental health and wellness. I plan to start my master's in 2027, and eventually want to get a doctorate.

Please do not ask me to diagnose you/give you mental health advice. I am also not here to argue with anyone regarding the psych field. I am very mentally ill myself and did not make my career choice lightly. Can you reblog/share/contribute to my fundraiser? As much as I'd love to, I am disabled and unemployed. I have no money to give and no energy to vet anything. Can you tag (thing)? Sure! Just let me know. Are you pro-ship or anti-ship? Neither. Be normal and don't make fucking child porn/zoophilic content. Fiction is not reality, but fiction is not immune from perpetuating ideas/biases. Can I be your friend? I do not connect easily to people, so don't expect easy friendship, but I'm open to talking to anyone, especially if we're mutuals. It's cool to get to know people!

Who drew the art in your icon/banner/pinned post banner? I'm probably going to swap them out as I get new art, so if you want to see art credits check out my fursona's gallery. Are you a furry? Nope. I interact heavily with the community, have a fursona, and fursuit but I don't connect with the label. How are you disabled? I've had bipolar disorder since I was a kid and chronic pain since I was a preteen and struggle daily with neurological, cardiac, and urinary problems. I am also autistic, though I do not consider myself particularly disabled because of it. You're intersex? Yep. I have hyperandrogenism from PMOS. Got any other questions? Feel free to ask.

[lakevida]

do you have the screenshot of that tumblr reply that says something like "because of you im gonna kill the next white person i see" i need it

i dont have it sorry anyone have it

[tincansamurai]

[foreveriallyzombified]

i had a nightmare last night madonna lady gaga (all one person in this dream like a fusion) released a single called “PUNANI” and it the music video was just her squatting in different places across the world with the exact same framing with no underwear, with everything shown but the like. inside labia part was painstakingly and specifically censored with huge white lines. but the clitoris and holes and everything were perfectly visible and the video was playing on all TV’s constantly during the olympics. i was on a date with a guy i like and it turned on in the restaurant and the lyrics were like “infected punani sweet punani sour punani” just listing different adjectives some of which were really disgusting or medically concerning and i was like Hey man can you turn this off? and the waiter did but then like. later in the dream (we were walking around in hollywood and holding hands) the song came on again and i had to pretend to think it’s fine to not come off like. a prude.

the thing is PUNANI (2021) by madonna lady gaga was an extremely minor part of the dream. the main thing was i was trying to take the guy around town but there was a Blackwater type independent contractor army protecting almost every store and would point guns at us and they were also wh*te supr*macists and would make comments about us as we walked along. punani was just like. completely unquestioned in-universe lore. that ther song was released and everyone was ok with it

[foreveriallyzombified]

the song itself kind of sounded like technologic by daft punk

[oneheadtoanother]

[infiniteoreos]

undiagnosed autistic people will be like "I don't get upset when my routine changes though!!" and it's because they've built a set of if-then loops in their head to pick from one of 6 different strict routines and they do get incredibly upset when they're unable to keep to any of the 6 scripts. I'm john normal

[thundercrackfic]

This is called a fault tree. You will always know how to act if your fault tree captures all possible scenarios. In NASA Mission Control during mission critical events like landings there are huge binders with fault tree protocols, kind of like choose your own adventure books except you’re not the one making the choices, the universe is making them for you and you’re just trying to keep up.

The engineers who develop fault trees, I am told, often imagine new ways for their precious spacecraft to die (new branches on the fault trees) either while in the shower or lying awake at 3am, because human

[toothpaste-footlocker]

[yet-another-autistic-blog]

Was just thinking about this the other day. Yeah I have a favorite seat on the bus (middle of the bus, near the back doors, slightly elevated, facing forward), but I don’t get upset if someone is already sitting there, I just pick one of my other favorite spots. Then I realized that most people probably don’t have a favorite bus seat, let alone a series of backup favorites.

[panpteryx]

[enbaluka-tokyo-drift]

[rebel-hunk-enjoyer]

The worst-sounding piece of advice I've ever been given that does actually work is to frame your health concerns as coming from someone close to you, whom you do not believe. Tell your doctor that you've been having pain and your mom/friend/partner thinks it might be an ovarian cyst, but you don't think so because the pain is much more intense and it has to be something else. This gives your doctor an unseen third party to fight instead of you. They can't just tell this third party, who isn't present, that you pulled a muscle, they now need to prove to this third party that it is not an ovarian cyst.

At which point they will find an ovarian cyst, but they now get whatever fucked up satisfaction they derive out of proving you wrong, because you didn't believe it could a cyst at all, but guess what? They did find a cyst! It's such a good thing you didn't listen to your intuition and came to them to verify your lay diagnosis from that third party! Bonus? Doctor doesn't have to feel like they look stupid in front of a patient, which is really what all this is about. Not your health, why would you think your medical diagnosis is about your health? It's obviously about a doctor's potential ego.

And apparently this works. Apparently you just need to be able to always play 4D chess with your medical professionals in order to find an avenue of advocating for yourself and getting you medical needs met. Isn't that great?

I hate it here, actually.

[pronouncingitwang]

at some point in your life you will be boiling fruit, water, sugar, and lemon juice in a pot to make a syrup or jam. the instructions will tell you to simmer for a certain amt of time. your timer will go off and you will look at the pot and go, "hm, this doesn't look thick enough. maybe i'll let it go for another 10 minutes." this is the devil speaking. it's only so liquid right now because it is at boiling point. it will thicken when it cools down. learn from the follies of my youth and do not let this happen to you

[yokowan]

at some point in your life you will be making a sauce or a stew in which you need to add cornstarch to thicken it. and you will prepare a slurry of starch in cold water and think "this looks like way too little starch to thicken this amount of liquid." this is the devil speaking. cornstarch instantly polymerizes at 95°C and if you add too much it will turn into an impossibly thick goop.

[le-jardin-inculte]

at some point in your life you will be making some sort of cream based dessert that requires gelatin to thicken it. and you will soak some gelatin sheets in water and think "this is too few gelatin sheets for this amount of cream." this is the devil speaking. it will thicken in the fridge and if you add too much you will end up with milk jelly

[shithowdy]

at some point in your life you will be baking cookies. you will take the sheet out after twelve minutes as the recipe instructs and the cookies will still be glistening and soft. "these don't seem cooked enough," you will think to yourself, "i should place them back into the oven until their edges are nice and golden." this is the devil talking. this is how you get dry, overdone cookies. the cookies will continue to bake on the warm sheet for several more minutes and then harden up after sitting on a rack for a while. trust the process. trust the process.

[the-big-mood]

[luxwing]

Whenever I hear someone say "the woke mob" I have to stop myself from laughing because even today all I can think of is this fucking tweet

[luxwing]

Happy Pride to the Woke Mob

[nitw]

adhd demand avoidance/paralysis is the fuckin enemyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy

[nitw]

SAY IT WITH ME KIDS (AND ADULTS)

it doesn't need to be perfect, try not to expect it to be

the hypothetical feeling of unfulfillment you're trying to avoid is nothing compared to the shame you'll almost certainly feel if you end up not trying at all

it's easier to pick up from step 1/10 than step 0/10

if you need to get moving and are currently not moving, try moving in an unrelated way. do something else. literally anything else outside of The Thing just don't stay frozen

yes this will happen again, no the solution won't always be the same, no your past experience won't always make it easier. BUT if you can internalize these things at least you might not be as surprised or feel as guilty(!!!) when it happens and THAT can do a lot of heavy lifting

[godlessondheimite]

In 2026, the chicest thing a gay actor can do is never explicitly come out as gay but also make it abundantly clear that he is. Coming out is too modern. Staying closeted is too old fashioned. But this method merges contemporary freedom with Old Hollywood glamour and allure, and it weeds out the dumbest people who truly don’t get it. I call it the Pascal Method.

[nobodys-odyssey]

Taylor Swift does this

[godlessondheimite]

no she doesn’t

[nobodys-odyssey]

You clearly don't go here or to queer history and signaling, or both, enough to have this conversation and I'm not going to explain it to you. You could have asked questions, you could have done even a modicum of research. You didn't and you made yourself look ignorant. Goodbye.

[dancinbutterfly]

#I'm fucking crying#this is an instant classic#this is the next meme#i can't believe I'm here to see a baby copypasta nary two hours old#I can't#lol#i laughed way too hard#iconic

[kygerbearr]

mid-conversation I toss a pistol onto the table not to suggest or imply anything but just to change the situation a little

[longseasons]

[gwydionmisha]

Bonus: If I buy a book I get to keep it! The publisher can't turn up at my house at random and confiscate all the books I bought.

[mousidy]

"afab only housing" is honestly beautiful. it's #progress to use inclusive language when discrimating against trans women

[mousidy]

you might as well just say "no men, and yeah I think men includes you trannies (but trans men aren't men you ladies are welcome 🥰)"

[butchnandos]

^^^

[rokosourobouros]

It really is one of the best examples of them compounding. Cause when I was in a really bad spot housing wise, a few times I applied to those anyway and made a point about being like "oh I'm afab" and it felt so fucking gross. But I didn't wanna be homeless. So I made myself uncomfortable (and for nothing as it turned out, I would not do the same thing again if I went back in time)

But even then, and even more now, I was so conscious of the fact that, as uncomfortable and gross as it felt.... It was an option. And if I was a trans woman, no matter how desperate I was, it would not BE an option. It's a way of understanding privilege more people need to take on IMO, cause it's not about whether or not I think of it as a privilege. Course I dont. That's not the point.

[orteil42]

given the current climate this pride especially i feel i must mention that i love my trans friends, i stand with trans people in the fight against transphobic legislation and those who would enforce it, and this blog is not a good place for you to be if you do not vibe with that

[anothercrankyblogger]

What they aren't telling these kids that's really dangerous is that if you do make it all the way to the heart of a Scientology building, the autosave will lock you into entering the Tom Cruise boss fight chamber, and you won't be able to leave until you defeat him in combat.

[aggot]

weather so nice i've decided to free a hostage