>:)

2000, monk and stronk

[jenny-holzer]

[cheaphalloweencostume]

i need to come up with a way to say “i mean like, movies for grownups” that doesn’t make me feel like a villain

[godlessondheimite]

A YA romantasy writer filed suit against another writer for copyright infringement, and as is always the case with these things, she padded her claims with delusionally spurious examples. The judge issued a 160-page ruling against the plaintiff where you can tell from the start how resentful they (or whatever clerk actually did the work) are to have been forced by duty to have read the works in question.

[sableleatherywingsopeninthe711]

my job under siege by zant's foul army

[columbiformed]

I'm kind of a bad housemate bc I'm up all night slamming my head against the wall going "WHYYYYY"

[sacred-portal]

[hxh]

i know everyone loves how slow i drive from the way they ride my ass as close possible so they can see how good i am at this they just really love my ability to go about 2-5mph under the speed limit that they wanna be closer to me

[0rdi-deactivated20211118]

Travis Mcelroy has joined BROCKHAMPTON

[bloomfish]

Patient on the Pitt: wahhh my feet hurt

Doctor: no problem sir we'll stitch you up. Get me 100ccs of lorazepam stat and intubate. Oh no, why isn't this working? His feet are still in danger!

*uncovers sheets to reveal hooves*

Other Doctor Who Is More Woke: those are his hooves you bitch. Prep 10000ml of Ketamine.

First Doctor: damn. I was wrong and it almost cost this poor patient his life.

Second Doctor: 90% of all patients are secretly horses and anti-horse bias kills thousands every year. As Doctors we need to check our prejudices, and you can read more about this on www.somepatientsarehorses.com

[suigintou]

i bet it feels good as fuck to erupt from the soil as a skeleton warrior

[scavengedluxury]

Ouffff

[thatswhywelovegermany]

[cyanswix]

New Pokemon games dropped

[holdoncallfailed]

ever since i was a little girl i knew i wanted to deny location sharing and turn off personalized ads and reject all non-essential cookies and not set up siri and face ID

[sacred-portal]

[yharnam-is-a-fuck]

[cleaningouttherooms]

sex is some naked bullshit and food is some crap they found on the ground but online poker is forever

[repmet]

*crouches to go into stealth*

the cracking of my knees alerts the guards, I am immediately killed