oozey mess
YOU ARE THE REASON
blake kathryn
tannertan36
we're not kids anymore.
@theartofmadeline
Today's Document
Jules of Nature
he wasn't even looking at me and he found me
RMH
pixel skylines
Sweet Seals For You, Always
Origami Around
Mike Driver
One Nice Bug Per Day
Kaledo Art
titsay
KIROKAZE
No title available
let's talk about Bridgerton tea, my ask is open
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@leafdapple18
So we had to read this passage in class from A House on Mango Street and...
"What matters, Marin says, is for the boys to see us and for us to see them. And since Marin’s skirts are shorter and since her eyes are pretty, and since Marin is already older than us in many ways, the boys who do pass by say stupid things like I am in love with those two green apples you call eyes, give them to me why don’t you. And Marin just looks at them without even blinking and is not afraid."
If human babies are called infants, why aren't elephant babies called inphants?
How many guys have you fucked?
0 and you aren't gonna be the first
Virgin?
Yup
As someone who has never seen Star Wars, I don’t get what all the fuss is about. I tried to watch one when i was younger and couldn’t sit through 15 minutes of it, let alone understand what was happening
I just had a 20 minute conversation explaining to a customer what chicken wings were.
Did you say that they were wings from a chicken? @cheshireinthemiddle
Didnt work
I can imagine the phrase ‘BUT THEY DON’T FLY, HOW CAN THEY HAVE WINGS?!’ being used at least twice
It was worse
Can you please explain in detail how it was worse
Customer: what kind of chicken do you use for your fried chicken wings?
Me: im unsure of the brand, but i can check
Customer: no, what part of the chicken is it?
Me: im sorry?
Customer: like what is it made out of?
Me: they are chicken wings.
Customer: i dont think you understand my question. Is it chicken thigh, or chicken breast?
Me: it is made with chicken wings.
Customer: okay, you arent hearing me. Chicken is sold in different parts. What oart are you selling?
Me: chicken wings. The dish is fried chicken wings. Are you perhaps asking if they are boneless? They arent. They are actual bone in wings.
Customer: Im asking what *type* of chicken it is. You are making this way more difficult than it has to be.
Me: here, our menu has a picture of the dish. These are the chicken wings available today.
Customer: how can i tell what kind of chicken it is if it is covered in brown crunchies?
Me: brown…crunchies? These are certainly chicken wings. You can see the bone here.
Customer: can i speak to the manager? You dont know what youre talking about.
Me: actually i am acting manager until we get a new hire.
Customer: all i want to know is what kind of chicken you are serving.
Me: fried chicken wings.
This went on for 20 whole minutes. She didnt even order the meal.
This is the most frustrating thing I’ve ever read
Source For more facts follow Ultrafacts
EVERY TIME SOMEONE BRINGS UP THE LIBRARY OF ALEXANDRIA I GET SO ANGRY.
Because it got burned. All of that knowledge, lost forever.
The library was destroyed over 1000’s of years ago. The library consisted of thousands of scrolls and books about mathematics, engineering, physiology, geography, blueprints, medicine, plays, & important scriptures. Thinkers from all over the Mediterranean used to come to Alexandria to study.Most of the major work of civilization up until that point was lost. If the library still survived till this day, society may have been more advanced and we would sure know more about the ancient world.
That graphic grinds my gears every time I see it
romans.
Julius Caesar to be precise
Remember this when you’re conquering. Keep the books.
THIS HURTS MY HEART SO MUCH EVERY TIME ITS BROUGHT UP
Julius Caesar needs to be stabbed for this
I know we should totally stab Caesar
Does March 15th sound good for everyone??
hey everyone, guess what day it is
self confidence level: kelso
VALENTINE'S DAY | ASK SPECIAL
1: Do you have a crush at the moment?
2: Have you ever been deeply in love?
3: Longest relationship you've ever been in?
4: Have you ever changed for someone?
5: How is your relationship with your ex?
6: Have you ever been cheated on?
7: Have you ever cheated?
8: Would you date someone who's well known for cheating?
9: What's the most important part of a relationship?
10: Do you like to be in serious relationships or just flings?
11: When you are dating someone do you believe in going on "breaks"?
12: How many people have you ever hooked up with?
13: What's one thing you regret saying/doing in a previous relationship?
14: What age do you think is appropriate for kids to start having sex?
15: Do you believe in the phrase "age is just a number"?
16: Do you believe in "love at first sight"?
17: Do you believe it's possible to fall in love on the internet?
18: What do you consider a deal breaker?
19: How do you know it's time to end a relationship?
20: Are you currently in a relationship?
21: Do you think people who have dated can stay friends?
22: Do you think people should date their friends?
23: How many relationships have you had?
24: Do you think love can last forever?
25: Do you believe love can conquer all things?
26: Would you break up with someone your parents didn't approve of?
27: If you could go back in time and give yourself one piece of advice about dating what would it be?
28: Do you think long distance relationships can work?
29: What do you notice first about another person?
30: Are you straight, bi, gay or pansexual?
31: Would it bother you if your partner suffered from any mental illness?
32: Have you ever been in an abusive relationship?
33: Do you want to get married one day?
34: What do you think about getting your partner's name tattooed?
35: Could you be in a relationship without sex?
36: Are you still a virgin?
37: What's more important: Looks or personality?
38: Do you enjoy love films?
39: Have you ever given anyone/received roses?
40: Have you ever had a valentine?
41: What's your imagination of a "perfect date"?
42: Have you ever read "Romeo & Juliet"?
43: What's more important: Your partner or your friends?
44: Would you consider yourself "romantic"?
45: Could you imagine to date one of your current friends?
46: Have you ever been "friendzoned"?
47: Which "famous couple" is your favorite?
48: What's your favorite love song?
49: Have you ever broken someone's heart?
50: If you're single, why do you think you are?
51: Would you rather date someone who's rich but a douchebag or someone who's poor but a nice guy?
52: Are you good at giving other people advices regarding dating/ relationships?
53: Are you jealous of couples when you're single?
54: How important is it to make a relationship official (p.e. on facebook)?
55: Would you consider yourself "clingy", "overly attached" or "jealous"?
56: Have you ever "destroyed" a relationship?
57: Do you think it's silly to consider suicide because of a broken heart?
58: Are you the "dominant" or the "submissive" part in a relationship?
59: Have you ever forgotten important dates like your partner's birthday or your anniversary?
60: What's your opinion on open relationships?
61: Who's more important: Your partner or your family?
62: How do you define "cheating"?
63: Is watching porn while being in a relationship inappropriate?
64: Do you think Valentine's Day is overrated?
65: Would you consider yourself a "cuddler"?
Whenever I think I want to give birth, I think about the most painful poop I’ve had intensified by 100 and in the other hole. I change my mind pretty quickly
My teacher won’t email me back is this the friend zone
it has been a long week and i am very tired
pls show me your cats
this is Buster, showing us her very dirty feet.
This is Dany. He has anxiety, but he’s full of love.
This is Tally, a 10 yo 18 pound Maine Coon, who will let you use her tummy for a pillow when you’re sad, and will just purr & groom you until you feel better 💕
This is Jareth, a rescue who advises you to consider the benefits of a good long nap
This is Miss Noir. Her hobbies include being besties with the food bag, running away from things in fear, and stairstep lurking.
This is Miss Nicole. Her hobbies include being an immense asshole.
This is Uno. He thinks things are gonna be okay. I intend to believe him.
This is Kit. He likes chasing bugs, digging in his litter box, and being aggressively cuddly.
this is crookshanks she’s orange
this is Keyes he’s my lead strategist
this is toast, hes a cool dude
This is Rosie. She’s loud because she’s full of bees
This is Sweety he is very large
This is Khensu he belongs to my neighbors he’s half Maine coon I hang out with him when he gets lonely
This is little cat, she loves headbutts and standing on people
this is Elly she’s very soft and a butthole
This is Lord Peter Wimsey and he thinks everything belongs to him.
This is Pumpkin he has a great purr but his dignity is defective
This is naruto uzumaki and hes a little cunt
This is Latte; she’s charging her warmth meter by my hot PC and getting ready for a lap attack.
That’s Litellest Kitty who gives me allergy and gets really fluffy in the winter TT
This is Lucky she’s very angry
This is Booger, he’s 20 pounds and an asshole but he likes chin scratches and snoring
Here a two-for-one! Shadow and Simba, who both know they’re not supposed to be on the fucking kitchen table, but if they look cute enough they might get away with it (they definitely do).
This is Roman. He thinks biting and showing affection are the same thing.
This is Keli on @thisallegra’s robe. She’s meowsy and loves pets and scritches.
This is Pumpkin! the dog scared him so he hid in the wrapping paper…
This is Missy and she gets really happy when I come come from college
This is one of my cats Chewy, he’s fat and also in a box
This is Captain Mal Reynolds. She’s a fat jerk who screams at everything and likes to pretend she doesn’t love cuddles.
What if someone got bitten by a vampire, but didn’t realize it. So then they go around and keep misidentifying all the symptoms, like
“Dude, you haven’t gone outside in a while.” “Yeah, last time I went out I got this wicked sunburn.”
“Are you still up?” “Yeah, I started bing watching this show on Netflix.”
“Dude, I’m seriously craving something right now.” “Like what?” “I dunno. Pizza rolls?”
“Why is it that you never come into my house unless I invite you?” “Um, it’s called ‘being polite’…?”
“I tried cooking with garlic the other night and got this serious burn on my hand. I think I’m allergic, but all I’m getting on Google is vampire bullshit.”
“Dude can a mirror like… stop working or something?”
“Dude, why do you keep posting pictures of the floor?” “…Those are meant to be selfies, I guess my camera must be broken.”
“Dude, I am all for you expressing your religious beliefs, but could you not wear your crucifix when I’m around? It really bugs me for some reason.”
“Have you ever noticed how cute bats are? like really noticed? sweet lil balls of fluff with wings man.”
“I want to sleep in a coffin…ya kno, for like… aesthetic”
“What’s with your thing about necks lately?”
“MUST YOU KINKSHAME ME IN MY OWN HOME”
“I looked up my symptoms on WebMD, and it says I have cancer.”
me: has a breakdown
me: gets super embarrassed about it the second I calm down
#no deleting your embarrassing breakdown posts from the night before#we die like men (x)
Do y’all ever think of a really good post idea, but you don’t have your phone at the time or you’re too busy to actually post it? Like you think of something really funny but because you can’t actually type it, it gets lost in the void. You remember only that you had a really good post but you can’t remember what it said. And the remembrance happens days or even months later and it bugs you to eternity. Yeah, that’s me today.
What is wrong with people???
Okay so one night i was sleeping and my stepdad walks in at 2:31 in the morning and asks if I'm asleep. He woke me up to ask me if i was ASLEEP. I couldn't sleep the rest of the night and went to school exhausted (I get up at 4:45). I need my sleep man. Don't mess with my sleep.
What even is straight expresso? What do we normally get? Do we all just get gay expresso? Do all the homophobes specifically order straight expresso? Fuck you, homophobes. Fuck you and your straight expresso.
