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i hope that people who leave rants in their tags, people who leave descriptions for their playlists, people who have funny titles for their essays, people who read aloud to themselves, people who giggle at their own jokes, and people who smile when they make eye contact with strangers are all having excellent days

#they make me happy #people #ellie posts #serotonin

everyone go read “the keeper of magical things” by julie leong so i can have people to freak out with. please. cozy sapphic fantasy. need i say more??

#the keeper of magical things #julie leong #yall it’s so gay #lgbtqia fiction #cozy sapphic fantasy

apoemaday

I Sing the Body Electric; Especially When My Power Is Out

by Andrea Gibson

This is my body I have weather veins They’re especially sensitive to dust storms and hurricanes When I’m nervous my teeth chatter like a wheelbarrow collecting rain I am rusty when I talk–it is the storm in me

The doctor said some day I might not be able to walk It’s in my blood like the iron My mother is as tough as nails, she held herself together The day she could no longer hold my niece she said “Our kneecaps are our prayer beds Everyone can walk farther on their kneecaps than they can on their feet”

This is my heartbeat Like yours, it is a hatchet It can build a house, or tear one down My mouth is a fire escape The words coming out don’t care that they are naked There is something burning in here When it burns, I hold my own shell to my ear Listen for the parade when I was seven The man who played the bagpipes wore a skirt He was from Scotland–I wanted to move there Wanted my spine to be the spine of an unpublished book My fate, the first and last page

The day my ribcage became monkey bars For a girl hanging on my every word They said “you are not allowed to love her” Tried to take me by the throat And teach me I was not a boy I had to unlearn their prison speak Refuse to make wishes on the star on the sheriff’s chest I started wishes on the stars in the sky instead

I said to the the sun “Tell me about the big bang” The sun said “it hurts to become”

I carry that hurt on the tip of my tongue And whisper bless your heart every chance I get So my family tree can be sure I have not left You do not have to leave to arrive I am learning this slowly

So sometimes when I look in the mirror My eyes look like the holes in the shoe of the shoe shine man My hands are busy on the wrong things Some days, I call my arms wings While my head is in the clouds

It will take me a few more years to learn Flying is not pushing away the ground Safety is not always safe You can find one on every gun I am aiming to do better

This is my body My exhaustion pipe will never pass inspection And still my lungs know how to breathe Like a burning map Every time I get lost behind the curtain of her hair You can find me by the window Following my past to a trail of blood In the snow

The night I opened my veins The doctor who stitched me up asked me if I did it for attention For the record, if you have ever done anything for attention, This poem is attention Title it with your name It will scour the city bridge every night You stand kicking at your shadow Staring at the river It does not want to find your body Doing anything but loving what it loves So love what you love

Say this is my body It is no ones but mine This is my nervous system My wanting blood My half tamed addictions My tongue, tied up like a ball of Christmas lights If you put a star on the top of my tree, Make sure it’s a star that fell Make sure it hit bottom like a tambourine Cause all these words are stories

For the staircase to the top of my lungs Where I sing what hurts And the echo comes back Bless your heart Bless your body Bless your holy kneecaps They are so smart You are so full of rain There is so much growing Hallelujah to your weather veins Hallelujah to the ache To the pull To the fall To the pain Hallelujah To the grace And the body and every cell of us all

#rest well andrea gibson

cocklessboy

The other day I told a friend of mine that I never forget to take my ADHD meds because I fucking love my ADHD meds. I'm in my late 30s, I didn't finally get a diagnosis and meds until less than two years ago, and they have changed my entire life.

And he raised his eyebrow at me. We'd been discussing addictive medications a few minutes before, like the Tramadol I finally got from the pain specialist to take once a week or so to give me a break from my chronic pain, so I reassured him that methylpenidate (Ritalin/Concerta) is not addictive (at least not in people with ADHD).

His response? To raise his eyebrow even harder and say "Well it sure SOUNDS like it's addictive!"

And I had to explain to this man - who works in a healthcare related job by the way - that just because medication makes you feel good and helps you, just because you look forward to taking it, that doesn't make it addictive or dangerous. And he wasn't convinced.

The simple fact that I was excited to take a daily pill that has literally changed my life, after decades of fighting to get that medication, made him think I shouldn't be taking it so often. That it must inherently be dangerous.

I'm not even in America, but I'm pretty sure this attitude began there and then spread over here to Europe. This Puritan idea of "if something feels good, you must beware of it. Pleasure is dangerous, it is sinful, it is addiction, it is evil."

I know too many people who subconsciously believe that pleasure = addictive = dangerous = bad. Joy is a slippery slope to hell.

So here is your reminder for today that you don't need to be afraid of feeling good. If something improves your life, use it. Even if it is addictive - learn what that addiction means, whether the addiction is inherently dangerous or not, and whether the benefits outweigh the drawbacks and risks.

My ADHD meds are, in fact, not addictive. But I will take them every day because they make my life orders of magnitude easier. I will enjoy them every time I take them.

My tramadol is addictive. I will still take it. I will keep it on a schedule to avoid becoming addicted, primarily because addiction in this case would mean reduced effectiveness. But I am not afraid of my painkillers. They are life changing.

Take your meds, everyone. Don't let anyone scare you away from doing something that improves your life.

inbabylontheywept

There is something so sinister about the idea that a medication made to improve your life cannot be trusted if it improves your life so much that you like taking it. Bleh.

inbabylontheywept

It puts this weird moral obligation on suffering. Like if you’re actually comfortable with yourself and your treatment you’re somehow failing. That you need to be ashamed somehow that the medication helps you and need to be looking for alternatives.

But you don’t. You found a solution that worked great and then you moved on to something else.

#slay yes #all good #go girlfriend #i love you girlfriend #good post #hehe