once upon a time

there were two fish. One red. One blue. They died. The end. A Story by Me 18+

[wertfi-penguin]

Maybe the most damming thing about Nolans odyssey is i haven’t seen a single gifset from it

[geekyhistoriansunite]

[remysrogue]

apocalypse: rise, my Horseman of Death. I have defied god and brought you back to life. prepare to do my biddi--

gambit:

[blackwatersinkingship]

When I finish this whale shark lamp all 4 of you are gonna be So I'm pressed

[blackwatersinkingship]

She glows now, just so you know, and she's full of string deliciöusee string

[god-sent-gender-bent]

Are you gonna show us the lamp? 👀

[blackwatersinkingship]

Good news! Whäle shark lämp 🥰

[hollyevolving]

A lot more than 4 of us are impressed

[rabbits-of-negative-euphoria]

if they're gonna remake The Princess Bride, it should open with a kid sick in bed scrolling on his phone. his grandpa arrives with a gift--it's a DVD player with a disc already inside. grandpa hooks it up to the TV and presses play. and we all just watch the original 1987 film again.

[foxglovedforest]

The kids are aight

[byjove]

at least now we know why he has yet to return when Britain is in peril

[kitkatmoose]

We need a flick where King Arthur wakes in modern Jamaica and is very confused.

[byjove]

I think that would be so much funny. He wakes up on a remote beach in Jamaica and he only speaks/understands Brythonic and Medieval Latin. Locals assume he was a tourist who fell from a cruise ship or received a head injury and floated away from a resort. The authorities cannot match his description to any missing persons reports and his fingerprints and DNA produce no hits on INTERPOL. They suspect he may be Welsh or French because the language he speaks resembles Welsh or Breton but France and the UK both state he is not a citizen of their country. Stateless and deeply confused, he is taken in by the community near the beach where he was found, being cared for by a number of local families and doing odd jobs. He slowly learns English and adjusts to the contemporary world, uncertain if his belief that he is the legendary King Arthur was formed by whatever traumatic event caused him to end up Jamaica or if he is actually King Arthur and Prydain is in eminent peril. Mysterious letters from Morgan begin to reaffirm his belief he is King Arthur. He must choose between staying in Jamaica and continuing the happy life he has made for himself or finding a way to get back to Britain without any documentation.

[a-daks]

ancient king white boy stuns locals by ordering in perfect Jamaican Patois

[byjove]

He gets to Britain and everyone expects him to sound like a posh noble Englishman because that is the picture Malory painted but he prefers to speak Welsh and when he has to speak English, he speaks with a thick Jamaican accent.

[viralfrog]

[vergak]

Zillow house listings

[aaays-and-bees]

>go right

[vergak]

[giugirl743]

>go left instead (looks nice and fun!)

[vergak]

[bunjywunjy]

>…go back to the right

[vergak]

[muhlisss]

Go left

[vergak]

[muhlisss]

Go forward

[vergak]

> Ascend

[vergak]

[jpuff9]

Go right ->

[vergak]

[athena-viviana]

Open the door! :3c

I wanna see what’s inside!

[vergak]

Congratulations! You Have Made It To The Ping Pong Chamber!

[anachronic-cobra]

[scottishaccentsareawesome]

If you go any further, I’m scaredyou may end up in the Backrooms…

[girlnextvore]

When you see a Prep in hottopic

[girlnextvore]

“This Prep is ready for war bring it you emo fuck”

[girlnextvore]

why are people reblogging this again

this post is like 11 years old

WHY AREYALL DOING THIS

[derinthescarletpescatarian]

We’re all having a midlife crisis leave us be

[girlnextvore]

hey

fuck you LOL

[cyanocittae]

my friend keeps sending the groupchat voice notes of her eating bussy and calling it "asmr"..... bro go study for your physics exam 😭

[cyanocittae]

hi sorry uh. incredible miscommunication on my part lmfao.

my bad yall

[silvaurum]

basketball dracula isn't real dude he can't-- *sudden squeaking noises from the shadows*

[silvaurum]

*two pool toys having sex tumble by in the wind* oh thank god

[silvaurum]

*thunderous slam dunk noise*

[fallout-lou-begas]

Visit Original Link

[snoleopard7]

[gingerswagfreckles]

Buzz Aldrin punching a moon landing denier in the face at the age of 72. Lol.

[gingerswagfreckles]

This video has been almost completely scrubbed off the internet because the loser who got decked keeps suing everyone. Luckily for you guys EYE have a copy of the video! :)

In honor of the Artemis 2 launch!!! Suck it crazies in the chat yelling about how NASA is using AI!!!

[weaselle]

"you're a coward and a liar" it wasn't that long ago a man could be shot or stabbed with a sword for saying that to another man and nobody would think the man defending his honor had done anything wrong.

Also, Mr. Aldrin had an active military career before his astronaut days and i'd say he hasn't forgotten how to throw a damn good punch -- just look at his wide stance

10/10 well-deserved punch

additional info

at the time, Aldrin was 72 years old, 6 foot 2 inches, and 250 pounds. Sibel (the man he punched) was 37 years old

Sibel has made multiple "documentaries" about the moon landing being fake and has repeatedly harassed the astronauts involved, in this instance getting Aldrin to agree to the above meeting by pretending to be doing an interview on space for a Japanese children's television show

Buzz Aldrin's step-daughter was present, and in addition to being poked repeatedly and aggressively with a bible (Sibrel wanted him to swear on a bible that he went to the moon) Aldrin felt the man following them into the hotel refusing to leave them alone might pose a threat to her

charges against Aldrin were either dropped or never filed, based on Aldrin's lack of a prior criminal record, witness accounts of Sibrel's having drawn Aldrin to the hotel under false pretenses, Sibrel's aggressiveness before the punch, and Sibrel having declined to seek medical attention and sustaining no obvious injury visible to witnesses during the incident

[e-cryptid-deactivated20180601]

It’s okay to not want to have sex ever. It’s okay to never even try it.

[thefisherqueen]

I was 23 before it even occurred to me that not starting with sex ever was an option. The feeling of relief was so great I actually cried. 

You don’t have to if you don’t want to. You can have a fine live without ever having sex, I promise you. 

[impostoradult]

Also, it’s okay to never date anyone ever. It’s okay to never even try it if you don’t want to. 

I wrote a master’s thesis on intentionally single people, and the number of them that said in various ways, “I didn’t know not dating people was even an option at first” was absolutely tragic. They honestly thought they had no choice and it never occurred to them that opting out was even a possibility available to them.  

People honestly believe these are life experience you are required to have AND THEY ARE NOT.

You can just not have sex. You can just not date people. You can completely by-pass one or both of those things. Neither of those things are required to be healthy, happy, normal, mature, fulfilled, or any of the other bullshit notions that get attached to these things. 

[fordtato]

Sex positivity is about bodily agency which includes the choice to NOT/NEVER have sex, so inclusion of asexual/celibate/sex repulsed people will always be a pillar of any real discussion of sex positivity and sexual freedom.

[meatswitch-deactivated20231107]

Wizards (1977)

[definitelynotindecisive]

[bogleech]

Oh are there people who don't know this mess of a movie has the all time most spectacular final wizard battle in the fantasy genre??

[pansexualpasta]

I cant tell you how many times I watched this movie as a small child

[stone-monkey]

Looks like Nigel Farage (UK far right dipshit and conman) has resigned as MP to trigger a by-election. He'll be running again in a stunt to bring attention away from his undeclared multi-million donations, and to potray himself as against the establishment.

...except none of the major political parties are running in this election, currently leaving one opponent:

Count Binface

[ayeforscotland]

It appears that all parties with the exception of Restore are not going to entertain Farage’s media circus.

Count Binface - it is your time. People of Clacton, please do the funniest fucking thing that’s happened in UK politics for a while.

[ayeforscotland]

Shitposting at its finest.

[penny-anna]

what the hell is going on