Magpie's Treasury @magpies-treasure - Tumblr Blog

having a personal sense of style is gay culture and the reason why gay men are seen as fashionable and lesbians as tacky is because the standards are so low for men and so high for women send post

thunderlovesbird

and FURTHERMORE the standards set for women are centered around how appealing they are to men and not actually about style at all a lot of the time. Lesbian style doesn’t care what men find attractive and is therefore considered “wrong”

cecaeliawitch

I firmly believe that unless the couple has discussed and agreed to marriage ahead of time, nobody has any business making a surprise public proposal.

cisnowflake

Okay except some people want a surprise public proposal.

boreragnarok

Girl my husband took me to Spain and gave me a kinder egg on the beach, the ring was inside the capsule (Lord knows how he did that) if any feminist tried to take that away from me I may cut a bitch. Best surprise of my life.

cecaeliawitch

I wish people were capable of analyzing larger social trends and figuring that a significant number of women end up getting pressured into engagements or marriages they don’t want bc the audience that comes along with a public proposal will think she’s a bitch if she says no - instead of thinking “i liked it when it happened to me, therefore it could never turn out badly for anyone, not ever!!!!”

rifa

I think what people are misunderstanding here is that agreeing to marriage ahead of time doesn’t need to be like, asking permission to propose? I surprised my now spouse with a proposal in Disneyland but before that we had several conversations about the future of our relationship, future plans for our retirements and how we’d have to get married eventually for immigration purposes. I didn’t go to her and say “so would you say yeah if I proposed?” or hash out deets ahead of time, but we had enough of a mutual understanding and communicated desire to get married that, although it was a surprise for when and how I proposed, it wasn’t out of left field at all.

This is exactly like conversations about consent, people get up in arms thinking that it means you have to have contracts and serious sit down conversations before doing anything when its REALLY EASY to simply COMMUNICATE with your partner so things like this are done properly, yeesh

anotherdayforchaosfay

A piece of advice from my mother: If you’re surprised they proposed, you’re not ready to get married.

My now-husband and I had been dating for nearly a year, we had talked about marriage, what sort of wedding we’d like, children vs no children, etc. We went to a shopping center/mall during the holidays when massive sales are going on, and he had me look at the jewelry to see what sort of thing I like. I asked to have my finger sized for a ring…just in case. A few months later he proposed, and had the ring I showed most interest in. I was sick as fuck, had been on bed-rest for two weeks due to how sick I was, and he had spent those two weeks helping me get to and from the bathroom. I hadn’t showered for nearly four days when the fever finally broke and I was strong enough to get out of bed. Managed to get up on my own and was on my way to the bathroom when he got down on one knee and proposed to me in the hallway.

The WAY he proposed surprised me, not the proposal itself.

You should know a proposal is coming, be expecting it. Oh, hell, talk about what sort of proposal you would loathe. Now-husband and I had watched a guy propose to his girlfriend in the middle of a mall and the girl smacked her boyfriend. He used a MICROPHONE so everyone could hear him. She took the microphone, smacked him, and stated very clearly “this is the most humiliating thing you could have done to me” and walked away.

Some people aren’t okay with a public proposal and others love it. TALK TO EACH OTHER. Folks proposing: if you’re wondering what your significant other would like and want to surprise them with HOW you do it, talk to their friends, family, and reflect on conversations you’ve had. There’s a fair chance a public proposal will be a nightmare for them.

freakxwannaxbe

Honestly, in the end, a proposal should be just a formality for something that both people have already agreed upon.

It’s not that one can’t make it as extravagant as they want, but it should only come after both parties have already went through the details of what a married life entails and how compatible they’d be and that it’s something they both want.

A surprise proposal should always be a surprise because “Oh shit, I didn’t expect you to do this now”, and not “Oh shit, I didn’t expect you to do this at all.”

violetemerald

I think I’ve reblogged this before but I wanted to again.

merlinisnotover

A proposal should be a surprise, an engagement should not be

doberbutts

I had someone ask me via message on where to start in regards to adopting an “unadoptable” dog, and we had a rather pleasant conversation, but I feel like something needs to be said in public on this blog due to my history of having owned such a creature.

Ethical shelters and rescues do not label dogs unadoptable for no reason, in nearly all cases. There is something about the dog that will determine it being an extremely poor fit for 99% of homes that would be interested, and typically that 1% would need to make tremendous amounts of sacrifice in order to successfully own them. As nice as it sounds- wanting to give a dog everyone else has given up on a home- ethical rescues and shelters have a responsibility to take care of ALL of the dogs in their care and to not endanger those they adopt to or the general public with their adoptions. Taking in unadoptable dogs and keeping them until that 1% person shows up takes vast amounts of money away from perfectly adoptable dogs and ends up killing the friendly, healthy, young dogs that are deemed “more likely to be adopted”. Don’t believe me?

Someone I know from dobermantalk stopped fostering for her rescue when they took in 2 heartworm positive senior beagles to foster from a high kill shelter and left the young healthy beagle that had been surrendered with the older pair. The “adoptable” dog never got a foster. He also never got adopted. When his time was up, he was euthanized. The older pair did not survive their heartworm treatment. Three dogs died because of a focus on unadoptable dogs. Who does that help?

About five years ago, a woman took in two seriously dog aggressive presa canarios to foster. What was left of her body was found several days after the fact- she had been torn to pieces. It was hard for the authorities to determine if the presas had done the deed or if her personal dogs, one “pit bull” bbm and one frenchie, had contributed, but they guessed that the presas, two intact males known for engaging in serious fights with other dogs, had begun to fight and redirected on her when she tried to break them up. Due to their size, they would have overwhelmed her quickly, especially if the other two dogs joined in the frenzy. From there it’s hard to tell what bites were inflicted post-mortum, when the dogs ran out of food and turned to the only available source of meat, and what bites caused her death. Reports from those who found her described the scene as a bloodbath. All four dogs were euthanized. Who does that help?

A small breed puppy mill rescue dog I personally knew, deemed unadoptable for her extreme fear issues, was taken in by a well meaning family member. In a very short amount of time, this family member had been bitten multiple times for offenses as minor as walking by the dog while she was sleeping. Eventually, the dog slipped her harness after spooking due to a loud noise, ran into the road, and was killed instantly by a car. Obliterated. In front of her owner. Who does that help?

Skoll was a dog that had been failed by everyone in his short life. He’d come from known abuse and had clear abandonment issues. He had terrible health and his fear of people and his learned behavior of biting to make the scary things go away were ingrained into him long before he came to me. I gave him a chance anyway, I couldn’t sit by and watch a young dog be killed for something that wasn’t his fault. He mauled me without provocation and I euthanized him two months into our time together. He should have been euthanized on take in- he had a long, long list of documented bites well before he ever came to me, though I didn’t know it at the time. Who does that help?

Instead of focusing on these unadoptable dogs, there is a better solution. If you want to feel like you’re making a difference, find an ethical rescue or shelter and foster! Transport! Volunteer your photography skills! Learn their temperament and health testing process and volunteer there too! Make goods to sell at fundraisers and auctions! Organize a community donation pool! There are so many things you can do for dogs in need that aren’t things that, more often than not, end up with the dog dying anyway. But wanting to adopt a dog labeled, for good reason, unadoptable? Especially if you are not experienced in intense or extreme issues, temperament or health wise, in dogs? You are asking for a lot of heartbreak.

Adopt the adoptable dogs. Accept that we cannot save every unwanted dog. Accept that not every unwanted dog SHOULD be saved. It’s not the dogs’ faults, but neither is it the public’s for not being able to deal with these sorts of issues.

why-animals-do-the-thing

The choices rescues and shelters have to make are really complicated and have potentially live-changing implications for the dogs and humans involved alike. This is a good example of why campaigns like ‘adopt don’t shop’ and ‘no-kill by 2025′ are idealistic and have the potential to do more harm than good. There are no simple answers. Welfare considerations and responsible animal management cannot be encapsulated in one-size-fits-all punchy slogans.

superspy-anon

i have a lot of respect for our local humane society. they euthanize largely for health issues, and bend over backward to deal w behavioral ones, while at the same time prioritizing healthy, normal behavior adoptions. they ALSO do not adopt out problem animals without extreme vetting. i have seen them doggedly explain over and over again why X pooch was not going to be adopted by this one lady who wasn’t able to give him the care he needed, while said lady kept repeating that ‘any life must be better than being in a shelter’.

doberbutts

#don’t get why adopt don’t shop is bad tho#unless you really need a specific type of dog for something#it’s just for fashion?

I’m reblogging this from you specifically to address your tags, but I don’t want anyone to think that I’m attacking you or that I want you to get hate, because that’s not the point here. I also don’t have any desire to get into an adopt don’t shop argument or be told that I’m an evil heinous monster because I bought my dog from a breeder and will be doing it again when I have money.

It’s not that “adopt don’t shop” or “no kill” are inherently bad. It’s that they are catchy phrases that are incomplete in addressing the problem at hand. Is the problem of so many pets being killed in shelters the fault of those who euthanize due to space, health, or temperament concerns? No. Is the problem due to responsible breeding practices? Also no. The problem is that pet owners have an overwhelmingly bad irresponsibility problem and pets have become disposable when they no longer feel like stepping up to take care of the animal that didn’t ask to be owned by them. How many nice, calm, happy pet dogs are in shelters that just need a little obedience training or some help with potty training? How many puppies and young adults are given up for being just that- young? How many old dogs are given up because the owner doesn’t want to deal with the cost or effort of care for a senior pet? How many people have no idea how to keep a bitch in heat from breeding, or breed their bitch “just because” and then give her up because she didn’t produce well or because they decided against having puppies after all? How many dogs get out because of poor containment? How many people decide they don’t want their dogs anymore due to a completely preventable situation? How many people are at their wit’s end with a dog they didn’t properly research and don’t actually have the means to care for? How many of these dogs came from people that didn’t give a shit what happened to the puppies they produced as long as they got some $$$?

Good breeders take back their produced puppies if the owners no longer want them. No matter the reason. No matter the cost. If I decided tomorrow that I didn’t want Creed anymore, his breeder would hop in the car and drive 8 hours one way to pick him up and then would rearrange her house to accommodate having an additional intact male that WILL fight the two she’s already got at home. Good breeders screen homes to prevent such situations from happening, though of course people can always lie and sometimes things happen beyond our control- for instance, if I were to be in a car crash tomorrow that would prevent me from being able to properly take care of Creed, the same situation would happen. Good breeders make it very clear that you are never to put one of their dogs in the rescue system OR ELSE- I would immediately be sued by Creed’s breeder if I just dumped him into a rescue or shelter. Good breeders work with the rescue system- many are fosters, transporters, trainers, or high ranking staff in their breed specific rescues, and the community is always called to come together and identify a dog that looks like it may come from someone that doesn’t want their dogs to be relinquished like that. It is not ethical and responsible breeders that are to blame for the problem of unwanted dogs- their dogs are always wanted, and they take responsibility for their dogs’ existences until they meet their natural end.

There is no shame in buying a dog from an ethical, responsible breeder. Even if the reason is because you want a nice pet that meets your personal beauty standards ideal. I like miniature english bull terriers and those are practically unheard of in shelters because most of them get snapped up immediately by breeders trying to keep their rare and beloved breed out of the rescue system. The dogs are sterilized and adopted out to good homes that understand them. If I get a mini EBT, it would literally JUST be a pet. There’s no shame in me wanting a pet that I like to look at, provided I also know I can take care of it well. I should not be shamed because I have a personal preference for how I want my dog to look, act, or train like. If I don’t find what I’m looking for in a shelter, I’m not just going to grab a random dog and shrug and call it a day. I know what kind of dog I get along with the best and I’m not settling for a decision that’s going to stay with me for the next 10-15 years.

That’s not to say I turn my back on the problem- this house has 6 dogs living in it currently. 3 are purebred dogs from responsible breeders. 3 are from rescue; two mixed breeds and one purebred. Part of my dog training protocol when I was an apprentice was to foster and train one dog per week in order for it to get adopted faster. When that ended, I began helping the groomers at my store with their foster dogs, the most recent featured on my blog being TaterTots- a dog I personally would have adopted if I had the money to spare on a second dog at this point in time. But I didn’t, so I helped train her so that she’d get adopted quickly, and she did! Taters is in a loving home and now I’m helping another foster dog get adopted. I personally have adopted an unadoptable dog. My parents adopted an unadoptable dog. My ex adopted an unadoptable dog. A dog I am currently mourning that belonged to a friend was an unadoptable dog (tumor). I’ve spent the bulk of my life helping rescue animals and I am not interested in the implications of “adopt don’t shop” saying that I am a heinous monster for purchasing my dog and planning to do it again within a year or so. That’s why that’s not a great phrase to continue to push. It doesn’t do anything to solve the problem, and it spits on some of those who’ve done the most work with the animals that need the most help.

doberbutts

This got brought up again and I wanted to add two things onto it, two years later.

First: my point was never about “hard to adopt” dogs- ie project dogs that can turn around with an appropriate amount of work and money put into them. Dogs with minor behavioral problems, some anxiety, even some lower levels of aggression can frequently be worked with and brought to a sustainable medium with a good management strategy in place. These are not the dogs I’ve referenced here, and they’re not the dogs I’m talking about either.

I’m talking about the plethora of news results regarding newly adopted rescue dogs that have immediately killed their new owners or people residing in their neighborhoods. Almost every single one of these reports will either mention that the dog had shown warning signs within the rescue environment, or had not been properly temperament tested to begin with, two points that I brought up in the OP of being crucial to watch for. These dogs get euthanized, and a human family member to someone is now dead as well. This phenomenon does not help anyone, and endangers everyone who might come into contact with that dog later.

I’m talking about the very real occurrence where unethical rescues take in dogs that have costly, rare, or chronic medical problems and raise thousands upon thousands of dollars for treatment, while allowing other dogs to languish or be put to sleep in the same hands. When unethical rescues go to shelters and only pick up newly born puppies but not the mother, then go on social media spinning some untrue story about how the mother was killed or the puppies were abandoned and the shelter that had them was just going to kill them all or something to that extent. When unethical rescues get caught purchasing- yes, purchasing- puppies and adult dogs alike from puppy mills to then lie about their origins and backgrounds in an effort to raise money and boost adoptions. A focus on The Most Suffering means that the dogs who also need a home and would honestly be a much better fit get left in the best of cases, and get killed in the worst.

If you want a harder to adopt dog- adopt a disabled dog! There’s so many tripods, deaf dogs, blind dogs, seizure dogs, and more that sit in shelters because no one wants them, but that’ll make amazing pets. Adopt a large breed adult! They’re past the cute puppy stage and already so big that it’s common for them to get skipped over. Adopt black dogs- people shun them for their coloring. Adopt a dog with scars, a dog that has a stereotypically “mean” appearance (scars on the face, cropped ears, big bulky head, etc), a dog with health problems you can feasibly manage on your personal budget. Adopt a senior dog! They get left behind in shelters all the time and frequently still have several more years of happy life left within them. Adopt a dog that needs obedience training or housebreaking, and then fix that problem with a professional on hand! Adopt a dog from a breed people are more likely to dislike- provided you have researched the breed and know you can handle the breed-specific traits that come along with it.

Or, you know, there’s plenty of pretty good dogs that might need a refresher on leash walking or the basics but otherwise are just fine, that are healthy, that still need homes too. Adopt one of them- there’s no shame in going with a “more easily adoptable” dog vs a “less easily adoptable” one. If you want to adopt, this post is not to discourage you from adopting. It’s to encourage you to adopt a dog you can feasibly manage, and understand that ethical rescue deems dogs “unadoptable” for a reason, and thus you probably don’t actually want an unadoptable dog.

The second thing I wanted to add is this:

When I first wrote this post and this reply, a car accident that rendered me unable to care for Creed was completely hypothetical. In July 2018, it became a reality. For several months I was unable to care for Creed by myself and had to heavily rely on my roommates not only to do things as easy as take him out to potty and feed him, but also to take care of me too. I am fortunate that I have surrounded myself with other disabled dog people and that they all jumped at the opportunity to help care for my needs (and Creed’s), but what if they hadn’t? What if I lived alone?

I had said the answer would be that Creed’s breeder would drive down to Maryland, where I was living at the time, an 8-hour one way trip, and throw Creed in her car to care for him in my absence. The day after my accident, I called her to let her know what happened, because my symptoms were just getting worse and I had a feeling I’d have to make a decision pretty soon. Without me even saying it, she offered to drive to me (now a 3-hour trip since I also live in New England currently) and collect him herself, even though she had an intact male that would have fought Creed (his full brother), Creed’s mother who has started the age-related decline of time, Creed’s full sister who just had a litter, a litter of puppies finishing up their early socialization, a big dog show she herself was organizing as president of her club in two weeks, and an IPO trial to prepare for the next month.

That’s a full plate. And she still offered to drop everything and come get this dog she produced because of an overnight change with his owner that left the question of his care up in the air. Knowing she’d had to entirely rearrange her house for him, knowing she’d have to put off or cancel her competition plans, knowing she’d suddenly be paying for yet another dog AND his medical bills since he sustained a shoulder injury from the accident. Just to make sure I wouldn’t have to rehome him or put him in rescue while I figured out how much of my injury was permanent and how much I could reasonably expect to heal.

Please do not respond to this by saying that breeders are compounding this problem of unadoptable dogs or the amount of dogs in shelters- ethical breeders like Creed’s breeder are actively working to prevent both problems, and are completely willing to drop everything to make sure a dog they produced doesn’t end up as yet another statistic.

poutypetulant-deactivated201808

matchagirl

sorry but if your bed isn’t against at least one wall you’re not valid

hurleyquinnzel

Are you telling me there are people out there who have their beds just floating in the middle of their rooms like animals?

blessed-with-southern-sweetness

This makes me so uneasy

draumboosky

You have to defend from all sides I don’t like it

axelinabox

For the 3rd year in a row I’m seeing people give Netflix’s A Series of Unfortunate Events a try and then get disapointed/angry that nothing good ever comes out of it that everything always seem to go wrong for the Baudelaire and I’m just… if only someone, anyone…. had warned them

naturelidragon

me: *is repeatidly told by the story itself that it doesnt end well, has a title sequence song that is just about how one should stop watching immediately because it’s sad, the narrator, each episode, tells me that i have an option of not watching it and proceeds to wait a few seconds for me to leave*

A Series Of Unfortunate Events: *isn’t a happy story*

me:

repost-this-image

Can I also say that Patrick Warburton really is a PERFECT narrator for this. He manages to combine the dark humor and foreboding of the series perfectly.

sakura-haruka

#Iconic

sakura-haruka

Fabulously rich. Insanely attractive.

sakura-haruka

#AN ICON

sakura-haruka

Goodbye Baudelaires

fdsfjdsfjkf93723679267-deactiva

hashtagloveloses

breaking bad, fight club, rick and morty, clockwork orange, and the catcher in the rye are all arguably good things - but if a man says they are his FAVORITE book/movie/tv show? RUN.

arthicat

Can someone explain this to me?

thescotchinthenorth-deactivated

They’re all works that are examinations of compelling but deeply flawed (usually narcissistic and violent) men. People rightly like all these works because they are good, but the implication of the original post is that if a guy says they are his favorite work, he is probably misunderstanding the point of the work and instead idolizing the male protagonist and is unable to recognize their flaws.

weedle-testaburger

Basically, ask why they like it. If they like it because they think it’s well-written and made, you’re probably good. But if they want to be like Walter White, or Tyler Durden, or Rick Sanchez, or Alex DeLarge, or Holden Caulfield: yeah, RUN.

callsigndreadfrost

Finally I can reblog this post.

lord-kitschener

This also goes for Mad Men, run like hell from any guy who identifies with/idolizes Don Draper

aphony-cree

“It’s a satire. Many don’t get that… My daughter had a friend named Max. She told me ‘Fight Club’ is his favorite movie, I told her never to talk to Max again.” David Fincher, director of Fight Club