maximum zenkai brain

lune | 28 | they/them

[x-v4mp3y3lin3r-x]

I view reading fantasy/sci-fi stuff as "this work of fiction is being translated into english so that I can understand it, meaning some phrases should not be taken literally" lord of the rings style, and then I meet people who nitpick every word or phrase that "shouldn't exist in this story" and I'm like wow you guys are truly miserable and unimaginative. and also you tend to assume that english words all popped up in the 19th century and you never bother to check the etymology of the words you're claiming "shouldn't exist in this universe"

like sorry but in an apocalyptic alternate-universe earth, the phrase "train of thought" is plausible even in a world without locomotives, because the word "train" comes from the 14th century, and it meant "to drag"

that's why we call dress trains "trains". because they drag. the word wasn't invented for locomotives.

y'all say shit so definitively like idk man I think it depends. the english language is OLD AS FUCK. a lot of words you believe are modern just aren't

[iguanamouth]

bert and ernie go to ikea

[aropride]

if your animal is lying on the floor, furniture etc, it’s important to take a picture of them. then, if they move or shift in any way, it’s important to take another picture. with this technique, you can take many pictures of your animal

[yellow-cat]

has anyone else noticed that its awesome to have an anthropomorphic animal representation of yourself that you can draw in situations

[greatwaytokillhim]

still makes me laugh whenever i see it

[romanceyourdemons]

next time you’re at the thrift store and find a nice solid thick pile area rug for a shockingly good price and you’ve been looking for an area rug for the office forever and the color goes really nicely with the office color scheme and you think this is it, this is what i’ve been waiting for, stop, and ask yourself: did i take the bus here?

[romanceyourdemons]

next time you’re on the bus and see someone with an area rug and a look of deep disappointment in themself mind your own business

[a-book-of-creatures]

Book that was good: I liked it 👍

Book that was bad: this sucked 👎

Book that I wanted to like but which failed to live up to my hopes: I am going to write 10,000+ words explaining exactly why this book wronged me

[sp1resong]

"do you prefer yaoi or yuri" well i like nothing. i like silence. just me. and the cold, empty cosm[Hears a twig crack] .

,Who gors there

[mechanical-empress]

omggg yeahh that was SOOOO great serpent style yeah like wh- wait what, you haven't heard of the great serpent? what? what do you, what do you mean you haven't heard of the great serpent? like the perfect beast of evil? the reptilian goddess who rules us all? you don't know the great serpent? girl you are out of the loop

[roconize]

Today I woke up at 2 AM. Instead of falling back asleep my brain decided to conjure up these images which haunted my mind palace until properly expelled

[ravioliet]

[cuunos]

being a kid and hearing adults say stuff like "woah 2011 was 4 years ago haha" didn't really convey the fucking horror of a youtube video crossing my recommended labelled "9 years ago" and it's from 2017. that's not true. 9 years ago is 2010 or something. don't lie.

[parakeet]

☻/ this is bob. you may have seen him in the 2008 youtube comments sect- well shit i just decapitated the fucker. RIP bob 2008-2026 /▌ /\

[marian-devotee]

I took my little brother (autistic, mostly non verbal) out and he was using his voice keyboard to tell me something, and this little boy (maybe 4 or 5?) heard him and asked me "Is he a robot??" I tried to explain to him that no, he isn't a robot, he just communicates differently, but my darling brother was in the background max volume "I am robot I am robot I am robot I am robot"

[marian-devotee]

My little brother insisted if I was going to post about him, he wanted a cut of the "profits". When I explained to him that Tumblr isn't monetized, and is pretty pointless, he and my older brother pointed out that he'd still be bringing me "fame and notoriety" if the post got "big". So we agreed, if the post hit 10k notes, which seemed extremely farfetched and silly at the time, I'd take my little brother out for sushi (his favorite food) and let him eat as much as he wants.

I guess God wanted the little robot to enjoy some sushi 🍣 🥲

[thetruerarkher]

[nariarts]

Longtime readers may be aware of how much I relish an excuse to bully a company, so I'm sharing the wealth;

Clothing company Patagonia is currently sueing drag queen Pattie Gonia for "irreparable” harm to their brand.

To be clear; Pattie named herself after the region in South America.

So Pattie is asking people to politely ask Patagonia to drop the lawsuit.

I'm extending the invitation to all of you, because sueing a drag queen for 'infringement' in the current political cultural landscape is vile. Especially a drag queen who has raised millions of dollars for non-profits, uses her platform to raise awareness for climate activism, and fully aligns with Patagonia's apparent climate-conscious mission statement.

They're claiming they're sueing for $1. They're actually asking her to stop using her name, and pay over $1 million in legal fees. They're straight up harassing her.

In contrast, drag queen Jan Sport has a Jansport bag line. It's that easy to just... work with a queen.

Anyway. Be respectful(ish), but feel free to be annoying on Patagnoia's socials, asking them to 'DROP THE LAWSUIT'

I think they have a twitter and tiktok too!

[sailorbrazil]

thursday..... and i bet you wish you were her

[dark-hell-princess-tamamolandia]

"I am the Sword of God" is like easily top 10 things to declare immediately before doing something really stupid that will probably injure you

[indigosfindings]

people online: hi hows it going

people irl: hi hows it going

marina diamandis if she wrote an extended version of how to be a heartbreaker where it's revealed tbat electra heart is a bee: rule number five/is you protect the hive/so that the queen can survive/and all your larvae can thrive