Reason why, based on past and current experiences, I would be the worst main character in a horror movie:
1. One time I was babysitting my siblings and I heard a loud thump so I went up to check on my five year old brother and he was sitting in the middle of his floor. I asked what he was doing and he said “It’ll all be over soon.” so I kissed his head and said goodnight and left.
2. When I was thirteen my door fell off it’s hinges while I was reading in my bed and I found screws and fixed it and never told anyone or thought about it again.
3. I woke up in my backyard with a bible on my chest, brushed myself off, and went and ate some cereal.
4. My sister woke me up terrified and brought me to my older sister who was banging her head on a wall while asleep, I walked her to bed and tucked her in, and none of us said anything about it again.
5. My grandma told me our house was haunted and I said “they seem to be pretty quiet ghosts then.” Right as a cup fell off the counter without anyone near it, I said “that was petty.” And asked my grandma if she wanted to play cards.
6. The heirloom doll that sits in a box under my bed randomly showed up in my windowsill. I figured it was a better spot anyway and left it. It never moved again.
7. I planted some seeds from a box I found in the garage, and the next day all our plants died so I dug them up and put them back, and everything went back to normal.
8. I moved from a room upstairs to one downstairs and my things kept getting thrown into the hall when I wasn’t home, so I stood in the middle of the room and said, “I’m here now. Deal with it.” My stuff never got thrown out after that.
9. My dad told me he’d been hearing strange noises in the living room at night so I moved the bird cage in there and my dad said it stopped that night.
10. I watched a bunch of my books fall off my shelves so I picked up all the fallen ones and gave them to my grandpa and that was the end of it.
To everyone asking why I’d give my poor old grandpa haunted books:
He, 1. Is married to the scariest woman I’ve ever met (she almost got mugged when she was eighteen, guess who she’s married to now)
2. Bought a haunted house because it was cheap and told the real estate agent (who wouldn’t go inside alone) “it’s not like we all won’t be ghosts someday, and I don’t mind sharing a kitchen with a few”
3. Firmly believes I am a changeling and decided I’m his favorite grandchild because of it
I’m sorry you said you be BAD at being the main character in a horror movie, I argue you be the best
