[teenjournalist]

The saddest man in town could be seen this morning, slouching on his porch, looking at a rainbow

[theintelligentfool]

actually i dont want to turn into bowser to kill my bus driver

[bowserkillmybusdriver]

It’s OK to think things without saying them you know.

[scoes]

horny guy from 100 years ago: i think i hauve spanish flu

[gumy-shark]

playing stupid games but im really bad at them so im not even winning the stupid prizes

[byjove]

There was a trend in the 40s and 50s (not sure if it predates that or if there are places that still do it) where you could get your child’s baby shoes cast in bronze or dipped in bronze and use them as keepsakes or have them mounted as bookends. Better than the resin slop of the modern day in my opinion. My great grandma had my grandpa’s baby shoes made into bookends ends because she loved him very much and he was her only child and it is honestly really cute. My mom got her dad’s baby shoe bookends when she moved out and they were in my living room my entire childhood, she had explained how they were grandpa’s shoes covered in bronze and I thought that was cool.

Then I went to an art museum and saw bronze busts of people and my tiny child brain thought the person’s dismembered head and shoulders were in there…

[mclennonyaoi]

working with kids and one of them says “you know you eat 8 spiders a night on average right?” and another goes “no no no those statistics are actually skewed by people who like eat spiders recreationally for fun and stuff” and my head snapped up like a fucking sleeper agent

[amazoogle]

i set my name to Paul Enis in the app because then the stickers they put on my grocery deliveries would say P. ENIS. it was like this for months, but now all the sudden they say PAUL E. instead

i can't have that. i won't let that happen. what they could have never predicted is that a beautiful woman named Peni Sausage is about to log on

[mcwexlher]

My hungry ass could never visit the Criterion Closet

[3000s]

im so hungry i could eat a amazing food and refreshing drink

[akashicrecord]

Any kink-friendly nursing homes I can leave my aunt to die in? With little or no paperwork?

[parakeet]

little known fact about me i was actually isekai'd into this world from the video game world. i used to be a peggle orb

[somethinginthebasement]

peggle 1 or peggle 2?

[parakeet]

peggle 1... peggle 2... who's to say... it was just 'life' back there... to me... to my fellow orbs.......

[mrsterlingeverything]

Gay male phases of life

Part 1 ​ i like pokemon

Part 2 pain

Part 3 pain

Part 4 pain

Part 5 i like pokemon

Part 6 (typing at keyboard with one hand. on some random dudes selfie) his farmer’s tan had consumed his life… ever since he got hit by the Farmer’s Tan Ray

[kushblazer666]

[segamascott]

erika kirk being handed the golden opportunity to be the face of conservatives for the rest of her life and then fumbling it instantly by being genuinely unlikable and off-putting will always be funny to me almost as funny as remembering that charlie kirk got shot in the neck and died

[rapidlydecayingcorpse]

reverse suicide note where everyone you write on it dies

[rapidlydecayingcorpse]

wait

[definitely-not-a-plant]

and we could call it something like... murder note.. or something.. Kill note.. die note... we can workshop it later

[normalpostsforregularguys-deact]

babe I was only asking where the hoes at so I knew not to go there

[sevenmoreminutes]

kurtis conner video: This Conservative Influencer is Crazy

drew gooden video: The us governments obsession with integrating ai into every facet of our daily lives is going to bring about the collapse of society if we don’t get of our ass and start taking action

danny gonzalez video: Buying Food on Ebay

[sevenmoreminutes]

eddy burback video: I did the russian sleep experiment for a month