Beautiful Nightmares

Rachael, 27, Bi, she/they/he. Mississippi raised, living in Alabama, wanna get out of the south.

[draconym]

Going to a seder at a family friend's place tonight and I have been informed multiple times that someone there has changed her name to Stephanie, but because it seems nobody wants to deadname her, nobody has specified who Stephanie is. So I guess I'm just going to get a surprise Stephanie when I arrive.

[draconym]

I am among the first people to arrive which means I get to play a fun process of elimination game. It is not the family's youngest child so I think that leaves two more. Unless Stephanie is an aunt or a niece or something.

[draconym]

Have learned that Stephanie is the eldest child. Which is very convenient for me because she is the one family member whose name I could not remember anyway.

[draconym]

[important-animal-images]

[making-friendos]

Local goat discovers joy of painting

[noodles-07]

"it's all in your head" correct! unfortunately I am also in there

[heroineimages]

Mental illness is all in your head in the same way that prostate cancer is all in your ass.

[noodles-07]

this person wins everybody else go home

[depsidase]

[juicetrump2]

[striving-artist]

Another layer of fun. The first time I applied for a passport I was told my birth certificate was fake. It was the original. Literally the same piece of paper. But the state that issued it used to do half pages, so the government in other states, and then, the federal government wouldn’t accept it as real.

I had to get a new copy of it, which required a separate process, so I could then reapply for the passport. At one point they misplaced my submitted documents so there was a couple extra weeks. And then the earliest passport appt was like 9 weeks out.

If you changed any part of your name for any reason — Did your parent remarry and changed your name when you were little? — go start the process. You have no idea how many hoops it takes.

I don’t know if this will be in place. I don’t know if there will be another election. Start this process anyway. Right now.

[everythingfox]

He just proved the earth is round

[soloh]

I hate when I say things like "oh I want an ipod classic but with bluetooth so I can use wireless headphones" and some peanut comes in and replies with "so a smartphone with spotify?" No. I want a 160GB+ rectangular monstrosity where I can download every version of every song I want to it and it does nothing except play music and I don't need a data connection and don't have to pay a subscription to not have ads and don't have popups suggesting terrible AI playlists all over the menus.

Gimme the clicky wheel and song titles like "My Chemical Romance- The Black Parade- Blood (Bonus Track)- secret track- album rip- high quality"

[foone]

Tangara is an open source iPod clone, which includes bluetooth:

Tangara

The music player you wish you had in the early 2000s

[piranya]

[iwrotemrtambourineman]

my dealer: got some straight gas 🔥🤪 this strain is called “into the unknown”💀 it’ll have you making a pilgrimage in a place between our world and the next 💯☝️

me: yeah, whatever. I don’t feel shit.

five minutes later: bro I swear I saw the beast following us through these mysterious woods that I don’t remember entering

the highwayman: I’m the highwayman

[boatgrave-deactivated20250901]

[mysteryteacup]

*Scrolls past*

*reluctant sigh*

*scrolls back up*

*rebogs*

[tsunflowers]

I don’t know how we’re letting trump get away with all this shit when I truly believe that if you threw a blanket over his head he would think it was nighttime and go to sleep like a bird

[jkateel]

(Sound on.) We’re all doomed.

[chaotic-archaeologist]

History and related historical professionals straight up not having a good time right now.

[argyraeus]

@historicity-was-already-taken

[historicity-was-already-taken]

[everythingfox]

Why does he need a- … oh

[littlemut]

me: “sorry ): can’t come!! got so much to do at home”

me as soon as im home:

[fuckyoubaker]

THE FROG AND THE SNAKE

[everythingfox]

Sound on

[nwmo]

NEW FISH JUST DROPPED

[cannibalcaprine-deactivated2024]

I KNOW that playing God is morally wrong, but holy HELL, it looks fun.

[ninjakittenarmy]

Why is it playing God? We aren’t violating any natural laws. God set the parameters of the universe to allow these things. There’s nothing wrong with it, there’s no hubris in learning more about how to manipulate the universe around us.

[cannibalcaprine-deactivated2024]

We made a whole-ass fish.

[ospreyonthemoon]

The reason this was accidental BTW is because they used paddlefish eggs as a negative control group for a breeding experiment on sturgeons because the scientists, quite naturally, assumed that they were SO unrelated it would be genetically impossible for them to mate. Like. I cannot stress enough to you how these creatures last related ancestors were

140 MILLION YEARS BACK.

If you don't know how far that is, that's basically the start of the cretaceous. Let me simplify that for you even further. Chimpanzees and humans seperated, what, 5 or 6 million years ago?

This is basically like if humans could hybridise with THESE THINGS.

This is the sort of thing that should be impossible. They used those eggs to be ABSOLUTELY 100% SURE NOTHING WOULD HAPPEN.

And then THEY GOT FISH OUT OF IT.

Like. You can quite clearly understand why they didn't think anything would happen. WE ARE MORE RELATED TO BLUE WHALES THAN THESE THINGS.

THE AMERICAN PADDLEFISH AND THE STURGEON ARE SO COMPLETELY UNRELATED THAT THIS IS NOT PLAYING GOD. IF ANYTHING THIS IS AN ACT OF GOD.

THE SCIENTISTS HAD NO BLAME IN THIS BECAUSE NOTHING LIKE THIS HAD EVER HAPPENED BEFORE

It sort of goes against the rules of genetics a bit.

[ospreyonthemoon]

Oh i forgot to add

THESE THINGS, FOR HYBRIDS, HAD A REALLY HIGH SURVIVAL RATING. LIKE 70% OF THEM SURVIVED.

To put that into perspective, getting a blue whale and a squirrel and trying to hybridise them is more sensible, and that wouldn't produce anything but getting you banned from science. Most animals that aren't plants can barely hybridise two degrees away from each other.

BUT THESE TWO ENTIRELY UNRELATED FISH create PERFECTLY HEALTHY HYBRIDS.

the scientists literally had to do the tests AGAIN just to be like "okay this is real right. This is actually like, not a fluke, this works right" and it worked again. They just Can!

[cipheramnesia]

It clearly wasn't a fluke. This is a fluke.