Off on a Hero's Journey

Hi, I'm Nym (she/her) | Queer as fuck | Been on this hellsite (affectionate) since 2011. Icon by RedMosk

[offonaherosjourney]

Pinned post because why not

Hi, I'm Nym. My pronouns are she/her and I'm queer as fuck™. Been on this hellsite (affectionate) for over a decade

I swear a lot, I make posts and I reblog stuff. Everything is properly tagged. Every once in a while I get a new hiperfixation but I'm usually fairly good at queuing stuff and sparing my followers the brunt of it.

All my homemade posts are tagged as nym's posts and all my asks as nym's asks. Also, when I reblog art I usually tag it as #I forgot what my pretty art tag was. Other specific tags of mine include #gotta reblog tumblr history (which is self-explanatory), #space rocks, my tag for space stuff, and #nym has dreams is self explanatory and exists because I get a lot of weird but great dreams.

Beware that every year around the middle of May there's going to be a week where I will post a lot of Eurovision stuff.

Yes, my url is a Galavant reference. Go watch Galavant.

[athelind]

The Most Tumblr Punchline

I've noted before that my favorite punchline on Tumblr is "hang on, gotta look something up/okay that's funny."

Let me explain why:

It is a way to say "I don't get it" without blaming the joke or the teller.

It is a tacit admission of ignorance without shame or judgement.

It assumes responsibility for acquiring the knowledge the respondent doesn't already have.

It cues other people who Don't Get It to do the look-up themselves, allowing them to get that full impact of Getting It without derailing the post with explanations.

It gives subsequent readers, whether or not THEY got the joke, a little frisson of good feelings when they realize that someone else is now In On The Joke.

It not only makes the original joke funnier, it gets funnier the more often it's used.

[neko-mancy]

just saw a "only one bed" fic with the major character death warning

[dontbreakthechain]

#i guess that's one way to solve that problem

[idabbleincrazy]

“This bed ain’t big enough for the both of us.”

[polteergeistt]

[internetgreatesthits]

[mono-red-menace]

[unknown-but-existing]

i feel like this is more funny

[drabbles-and-rambles]

I saw a post about Shane and Ilya being sad that they can't thank each other in their acceptance speeches like other can with their spouses and it got me thinking:

Ilya wins his first awards and hes got nobody he really wants to thank after his team and coach cause he he hates his family but he knows his speech is too short so on impulse he goes "And I want to thank Shane Hollander for being slightly worse than me this season". Everyone knows it was going to one of those two, so everyone thinks hes an asshole to say that but whats new so it works for him. But from then on it then becomes a bit for both of them to thank each other in their speeches in a snide way as a reason they won.

Shane winning the Art Ross Trophy (Awarded to the player who leads the league in total points at the end of the regular season). and going "special thanks to Rozanov for missing at least 5 shots this season, he was a huge help"

Ilya winning the Conn Smythe Trophy (Awarded to the most valuable player for his team in the playoffs.) "Just want to give a quick shout out to Hollander for getting knocked out in the second round this season. Must hate to see me up here."

They find a way to mention the other in their speeches every time all the time.

[knownqueerbaiter]

SEPARATE CHURCH (AO3) AND STATE (TRADPUB)

[offonaherosjourney]

If you're the kind of person that has to get hair out of their shower drain and your go-to desk chair has wheels, this post is your signal to turn that desk chair upside down right now and check the wheels. I'm sorry to say the hair situation (specially if you'd never thought to do this before) is probably going to be waaay worse than whatever you're bracing yourself for. That's ok, you're not alone, and also here are some useful tips:

Your first thought might be fire. Do not use fire.

Check to see if your chair's wheels can be easily pulled apart. If they can, do that and then enjoy the rest of your day and know that I hate you.

So, your chair's wheels can't be pried apart and you just did some easy math and realized each wheel has two sides and that your chair has 4 to 6 wheels, so a voice in your head is urging you to reconsider fire. Do not listen to that voice. Do not use fire.

Get comfortable. Put on some music. If you have some nail scissors, those are my go-to. Tweezers and box cutters can also help. This is a multi-tool operation.

If you think the situation in one side of one wheel is not that bad, always remember to spin that side. And then check and spin the other side.

Once you finish your first wheel, you'll remember the math you did earlier, and the voice will be back to suggest fire again. I'm gonna be honest, the voice may not leave this time until you are done, but no matter what the voice says: DO. NOT. CONSIDER. FIRE.

Eventually you will be done. For now. Congrats. Now I'm gonna need you to go disinfect whatever cut or cuts you probably got. And then, and I can't stress enough how important this is, go set up a reminder to do this again in about a few months or a year.

[offonaherosjourney]

People mad or disappointed about the V-Max reveal in Spider-man: Brand New Day should:

Take at least one Writing 101 class and

Watch Star Trek: The Motion Picture (1979)

[twinicegiantorbiters]

scientist girls in their labs, witch girls in their cottages. both are oh so hard at work coming up with new types of beams to shoot at each other

[twinicegiantorbiters]

they are sending their familiars and their lab assistants to fight each other in the forests and in the parking lots

[mmmmbees]

[phantomrose96]

When you meet Edward Elric he gives off the impression that he's the short-tempered hot-headed "violence is the answer to all life's questions" kind of protagonist, and it's in fact incredible character craft that he's actually the character who ends the series with a negative-3 kill count.

[phantomrose96]

people killed: 0

direct orders of "you really really need to kill this guy" ignored: 1

ongoing murders being committed by Ed's own friends/colleagues that Ed got in the way of to specifically stop that murder from happening: 2

[phantomrose96]

God's worst soldier Edward Elric. Showed up as the youngest member of the Amestrian army, took millions of dollars from them, never followed a single order, helped dismantle their fascist regime, left with a lower kill count than he arrived with, then fucked off to go be a house-husband. Character of all time.

[i-am-a-radioactive-paperclip]

kaladin is lucky that the 'wouldn't you like to know weatherboy' meme doesn't exist on roshar because shallan and adolin would actually become the most annoying people alive

[kikokuso]

I have a new favourite batshit rail idea

Please build it for the funny please please please

[vacuously-true]

You're right. I SHOULD be able to take the train from Minneapolis to Berlin.

[homunculus-argument]

Has either of your parents ever accidentally called you/your siblings the wrong name? (someone else's name, like other sibling, pet, etc)

Yes, at least once

No, but I've seen it happen to someone else

No, never

I don't have pets/siblings/parents/hair

Voting ended onJul 9

[homunculus-argument]

I forgot to clarify that this excludes deanaming you if you've changed your name. I specifically meant the "brain offers the wrong word" kind of accidental name mix-up.

This was prompted by me and my boyfriend discussing handedness and being able to tell apart left and right. And me, being ambidextrous, was baffled by how do people with an obligate dominant hand mix up which side is the one with their Writing Hand and which one isn't?? And my boyfriend pointed out that I go "turn left - no I mean right" so much when giving directions that I have lost my navigator privileges.

I argued that mixing up the words isn't the same thing as mixing up the directions. Like if your mom accidentally called you the dog's name doesn't mean that she literally can't tell you apart from the dog. And he looked at me like this

Because evidently not only has this never happened to him, he has never heard of this being a thing. And he was so confident in this that I had to double-check that I'm not the only person this has ever happened to.

[homunculus-argument]

"If you accept any food from the fae, they shall never let you go" is a human belief. The fair folk stand by the principle that if you feed 'em, you gotta keep 'em. If wildlife learns to rely on you for food, you have already fucked up, and you can't just stop feeding them cold turkey. That human is your responsibility now. Because you left your peach cobbler unsupervised.

[bokuwaboku-datte]

Eridians must be absolutely amazed that Grace can be woken up before his sleep cycle is finished. They take advantage of this and fit the biodome's bedroom with a remotely-triggered alarm system, so if something ever goes wrong with the life support systems while Grace is asleep, they can wake him up and have him move to safety. But, being that their sleep is more like a deep dormancy, they WAY overestimate what it takes to forcibly wake someone up.

The first time they have to use it (over something stupid like a tiny ammonia leak), Grace wakes up to like three different foghorns and a hundred camera flashes going off at once and is like HOLY GEEZ THE APOCALYPSE IS UPON US

(eta if someone with art talent wants to make this a proper eridian welcoming committee comic please do!)

[goodieprocter]

RIP Rocky’s project

Bonus:

And here’s my reference:

[crazysodomite]

The popularity of the "incompetent stupid piece of shit husband and competent wife who loves him anyways" trope in media is a psyop to make women believe its normal to settle for an incompetent stupid piece of shit husband

[crazysodomite]

But if a woman acted incompetent once then she will be literally crucified in the street and she's evil for manipulating her husband into settling for less and suddenly it's not a silly endearing sitcom trope 🤔

[angry-eevee]

when people defend the “Cis white guy is default” thing like “He’s meant to be an everyman we can all relate to and project on!” kindly remind them the largest ethnic group in the WORLD is Han Chinese and the highest gender percentage fluctuates so if you want an ACTUAL  “default” you want a 40 year old chinese person whose gender changes from year to year.  

[galren]

#give us the middle-aged gender fluid Chinese protagonist that we can all relate to and project on (via @mr-and-mr-pavus)

[computationalcalculator]