"Life Is Just Pasta With Obstacles" -Wisest Person

I am just a little nb scientist trying to get through life and the next experiment.

[absenteism]

[estro-boi]

[batmanisagatewaydrug]

always some new bullshit in the ocean

[local-demon-in-your-area]

Why is it always orcas or dolphins

Why can't a salmon do some bullshit for once

[batmanisagatewaydrug]

worry not ☝️ they're doing coke

[divorce-enjoyer]

well im fucking the cursed amulet. so mind your business

[divorce-enjoyer]

"isnt that an unhealthy power dynamic" no its a sex thing "arent you and the amulet growing codependent" no its a sex thing "isnt the amulet sucking your life force" no its a sex thing. god forbid people have kinks.

[divorce-enjoyer]

[divorce-enjoyer]

who are the toronto maple leafs

[rebellum]

???????

[iamthemaestro]

found this at an antique shop the other day and was immediately like oh this belongs on tumblr. sniles sneetly. fwowns fwangry.

[redstonedust]

for the record im not technially 100% anti-AI, in the sense that its a broad category of tech being lumped under one umbrella term so it feels over-zealous to say i hate all of it all the time forever. but i also think trying to discuss what it actually IS good for is difficult right now when i cant take one step without something trying to convince me to use chatgpt to summarize my life and speed up my hobbies and turn my friends into chatbots and optimize my life into oblivion. i am certain there is nuance to the topic but can we stop cramming the square peg into the round hole before you start trying to sell me on the legitimate benefits of the square peg. please.

[sinnegantheworm]

here's my super-quick, easy-to-digest summary that i use when i can't spend more than like 15 seconds on it but need someone to know the basic distinctions:

generative AI - bad evil AI. chatbots, LLMs, image generators, etc. this the one that steals shit.

analytical AI - helpful medical AI. this the one that helps detect cancer early.

game "AI" - fake AI. 100% human created and dictated. this the one that determines game mob behavior n stuff.

[resemblingthegrave]

losing the battle with my own self-control so will briefly comment and say that categorizing certain types of ai as straightforwardly good and other types as "bad evil," even for the sake of summary, doesn't really hold water. just to give two counterexamples to the distinctions drawn above, large language models ("evil") are being used by human rights groups to parse huge datasets about police abuse while analytical ai ("helpful") is also the kind of ai that animates facial recognition software and the increasingly ubiquitous searchable license plate databases that police are using to stalk people. the goodness or badness of a given ai tool has less to do with its type and more to do with things like scale and scope, transparency, ownership, and contextual application.

[hometoursandotherstuff]

[gremlininho]

let me. innnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn

[jewish-joy]

Last year, I befriended a Catholic seminarian. We've gotten to be pretty decent friends. Seeing as he was staying in town for the summer and I wasn't, I entrusted him with caring for my plant.

He did a wonderful job, but as he was returning my plant to my custody, he explained "I watered her every other day, I gave her new dirt, moved her into the sunshine, prayed the rosary-"

"What?"

He looked at me, confused. "Isn't she a plant you pray with?"

"No," I said slowly. "She's a prayer plant. That's the... colloquial name of the plant."

Upon seeing his stricken face, I realized something went wrong. Turns out, this entire time, he's been including my plant in on his prayers and leaving her near icons.

Listen, totally cool. My plant becoming Catholic is a great deal for her not dying over the summer. But now I must navigate this interfaith household. Keep me in your thoughts.

[wyrmicelli]

me tongue-deep in a sandalwood candle: 🤤

the tjmaxx employee loading a fourth tranquilizer dart into their blowgun: i need backup

[snowown]

[micamicster]

They should invent a glasses that you can lay on your side in bed wearing

[wildestlovers]

embarrassment is the cost of entry.

if you aren't willing to look like a foolish beginner, you'll never become a graceful master.

[grrlterrier]

One of my favourite customer interactions

[as-if-and-only-if]

you serve the drink, they take a sip. it ticks down to 98% and they whisper “oh thank god”

[cipheramnesia]

Actually the real reason I transitioned was because my parents joked so many times about returning me to the child store I decided to void the warranty.

[cipheramnesia]

Actually the real reason I transitioned was my dad complained about women in golf so much I knew it was a sure fire way to make him stop trying to teach me golf.

[cipheramnesia]

Actually the real reason I transitioned was because I'm really supportive of my wife but I wanted to make shopping for their tampons feel less awkward.

[cipheramnesia]

Actually the real reason I transitioned was to prove to a point about the ending of the Scottish play to my 8th grade English teacher.

[cipheramnesia]

Actually the real reason I transitioned was because slutty shorts for men went out of style and I couldn't give them up.

[cipheramnesia]

Actually the real reason I transitioned was because I needed a good picture to get on Tinder, but I didn't want to hold up a fish.

[venerable-thief]

I am a huge fan of retiring to my quarters

[somethingusefulfromflorida]

In this economy you'll be lucky to retire to your nickels

[quinnception]

[pangur-and-grim]

alright I'm almost finished Project Hail Mary, and I have to say, I don't get why people are shipping the guy with Markiplier when he's already in a perfectly healthy queer-platonic relationship with the alien spider made of rocks

[pangur-and-grim]

that's insane. we need to change this

[paranormal-taters]

"i feel besquintled", said no one ever. because that's not a word.

[paranormal-taters]

okay nevermind it IS a word now and this is exactly what it means.

[paranormal-taters]

EVERYONE SHUT UP AND LOOK AT THIS NEW AND BETTER WORD