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throathole

Oh thanks but what the fuck does any of that mean

anariel-the-elrond-apologist

I’ve seen quite a few of these in my time, but this one takes the cake.

throathole

This is fucking killing me

Golp: a roundel purpure.

Repeat this to yourself until it begins to have meaning

a-book-of-creatures

Okay then since some of you need to be reminded of this:

Roundels are circles in heraldry. They are named according to their color, which also has its own lingo. Let’s meet them!

Bezant: roundel or (gold) 🟡

Plate: roundel argent (silver) ⚪️

Torteau: roundel gules (red) 🔴

Pomme: roundel vert (green) 🟢

Hurt: roundel azure (blue) 🔵

Golp: roundel purpure (purple) 🟣

Pellet: roundel sable (black) ⚫️

If your field is strewn with roundels, you can describe it appropriately as being bezanty, hurty, golpy, and so on.

It’s practically 2014 and you guys still don’t know how to google if an article is real or not before giving it 100,000 notes

Quinta Brunson and Hannah Einbinder's reaction to Keke Palmer bringing up the infamous 2 Girls, 1 Cup video during the Comedy Actress Roundtable for The Hollywood Reporter (May 2026)

moniquill

Hot take: there is no valid reason that official government ID should have either a sec or gender marker on it. First name, last name, dob + up to date image will suffice. Address, if relevant.

11thfempachi

Y'all know it's crucial to paramedics, right?

moniquill

Any of my followers who are paramedics/first responders/emergency room staff want to attest that no, it isn't.

What do you think happens in dire medical emergencies where an unconscious person presents and doesn't have ID on their person at the time?

hollowedskin

I'm always confused by why people seem to think that there is some sort of Penis Emergency that will kill you if paramedics perform the Vagina Procedure on your fully clothed body.

moniquill

Hospital spoilers btw: blood isn't sorted by sex, it's sorted by type. The sex of the blood donor doesn't factor in at all when receiving a transfusion, and you will not be harmed by receiving blood from a donor whose sex is different than yours. Saying this because it's another misconception that I've heard.

fetus-cakes

if you're unconscious at the hospital and they need to operate and insert a catheter in your urethra, don't worry! they'll figure out if you have a penis or a vagina without having to look at a laminated card in your wallet

moniquill

And if you have ambiguous or surgically modified genitals, they'll find your urethra anyway!

nothorses

the trans male experience is being afraid that if you wash your hands in a public men's restroom you will be clocked

actual-mothman

one time I went in the men's room at a bar, got clocked and told I needed to leave so later I walked up to that dude at a table with some chick and announced to her that He Doesn't Wash His Hands After Handling His Dick and walked away

nothorses

you are quite literally braver than any U.S. marine

sleezed

djkoenig-deactivated20140905

(◡‿◡✿)

(ʘ‿ʘ✿) “what you say ‘bout me”

(ʘ‿ʘ)ノ✿ “hold my flower”

chronically-ill-dandy

✿＼(｡-_-｡) “Kick his ass, baby. I got yo flower.”

djkoenig-deactivated20140905

thanks for ruining my post jackass

chronically-ill-dandy

(￣^￣ﾒ)＼✿ "Fine, I'ma keep ya damn flower.“

byjove

It is really embarrassing that I stop eating when I get stressed. Like a snake or a fancy fish. My body senses I’m struggling and it is like “You know what would make you feel worse? Low blood sugar. Food repulses you now. Starve and die or spend 45 minutes trying to make yourself eat a bagel.” This especially sucks because I have severe social anxiety so I’ll be out to dinner with friends fighting for my life trying to look like I’m enjoying the meal. Or annoy everybody by just ordering a water.