une vie à me cacher, et puis libre enfin

~Mags // 25// ♋ // INFP // 6'0'' // Straight // Certified Dork~

[onomatopoetic101999]

Mags’ Masterlist

MARVEL

Peter Parker x Reader

 Mistletoe

Steve Rogers x Reader

I Said, I Love You

Bucky Barnes x Reader 

I Need the Sun to Break

Adam Warlock x Reader

Strangers Like Me

VOLTRON

Plance

 Happy Valentine’s Day

MIRACULOUS LADYBUG

Nino Lahiffe/Carapace x Reader

I Can’t Lose You

STARFIELD

Sam Coe x Reader

Ignis Fatuus

BRIDGERTON

Benedict Bridgerton x Reader

Enchanted

LEVERAGE

Eliot Spencer x Reader

Distracted

Regrets

Alec Hardison x Reader

Lucky

STRANGER THINGS

Steve Harrington x Reader

Steve's Librarian

BALDUR'S GATE 3

Gale Dekarios x reader

Dream

FIC RECS

[the-bar-sinister]

So, the other day, when I was discussing AO3's policy on solicitation, a tumblr user came at me saying that AO3's "no monetization/solicitation" rules were "bullshit" because nexus mods allows fan created mods to get paid.

Look at me.

Look at me right now.

AO3 protects you.

AO3 protects you and your works. 

It protects your works from copyright strikes and DCMA takedowns.

It protects your work from advertisers.

It protects your work from overzealous legal challenges.

It protects your right to post adult content.

AO3 is non-profit and AO3 will never try to use you or your work to make a profit for themselves and AO3 will go to bat for you if someone tries to legally challenge you or your works.

Please respect AO3 and its mission.

[hackerlike]

Reblogging this again because of the recent Wattpad mass censorship.

Respect AO3s mission, theyre protecting you so you can post (almost) anything on their website because they are a non profit.

[rattling-bag-of-bones]

My lord I need you to make up your mind, where the fuck are we going

[mandalhoerian-deactivated202510]

my lord i think we're lost

[depresseddepot]

my lord????

[little-slice-of-eden]

*wheezing* please....My Lord....I just caught up

[thatdootdevice]

My Lord COME BACK?!

[warlockofagnesi]

MY LORD?? there is no way I can follow you there!

...all right My Lord [SIGH] I guess I will just have to trust you

[evaceratops]

my lord i WARNED you-

[hometoursandotherstuff]

[canine-t33th]

Must we live in squalor

[mikeyfuckinway]

"cozy bookstore" "cozy cafe with a bookshelf" "omg imagine if there was a place you could just sit and read at" we have this its called the library. you guys want to go to the library. the two college libraries near me have cafes inside and they are open to the public. people need to go to the library

[discoursedrome]

monks debating whether vows of silence should still allow you to leave emoji reacts on the monastery groupchat

[gallusrostromegalus]

So a guy I went to middle school with now works in the vatican and according to Cam, the rules on:

Whether you can leave emoji reacts in the groupchat

Whether you can leave regular messages in the groupchat

Whether you can HAVE a groupchat

Whether you can have Electronic Devices

-vary from one silent monastic order to another, but none of them have ever successfully banned "Long trail of increasingly hostile post-it messages on the fridge".

[locked-keye]

[angel-derangement]

I think the only true conclusion one could ever draw about Sabrina carpenter from her music is that she has a kinda weird relationship with gender, where she can never truly decide if being a woman is a good & powerful thing or a bad & weakening thing, and she can never decide if that’s her own fault or the fault of the male society in which she lives. this is not a criticism to be clear: that seems like a very normal way to engage with the world to me. it’s just funny to me that the seemingly most personally revealing aspect of her music is the way she seems to have no idea how to live as a straight woman. I can’t relate to this at all because I am not a straight woman, but man does it seem accurate to the experiences of straight women that I know. Straight women sound off. If you’re out there. Straight women can you hear me? Is it that me espresso?

[angel-derangement]

girl are you trapped in there?! girl get out!! girl scream if you need help!!! this is not very that me espresso girl!!

[roycohn]

yeah i mean i've been saying this for months (sorry OP to jump on your post, it just aligns with something i've been trying to get across for a while now) but the overt, on-purpose heteropessimism of her music in combination with her vintage drag queen aesthetic and mid-century movie inspired concert visuals are all actually working together to create really interesting commentary on the current state of heterosexual womanhood. she's a lot smarter than most people give her credit for and this is all on purpose. i think a lot of people tend to assume that female artists arrive at a place of satirical or otherwise layered social commentary by accident and it's just something they're reading into it because they're smarter than the actual artist, not that it's ever something they put into the art while they were making it... but like, if you pay attention to everything she's doing and the way she presents herself when she's off-duty as opposed to in performance mode, she isn't Doing Hyperfemininity 24/7. her stage presentation is one of exaggerated hyperfeminine aesthetic performance because it's part of her commentary on how the experience of straight womanhood is basically doing 200% for men who give maybe 15% at best. she's got a whole song basically lamenting the fact that she is unfortunately a straight woman who craves dick in a world where men are fucking terrible with no real motivation to change!

[femme-plant-mom]

Felt like this shouldn’t stay in the tags

[monkeyislandtwo]

why r callouts always like "please dont harass this person and dont go after them. anyway heres every single detail of their life gathered by stalking and their private profiles for all to see"

[monkeyislandtwo]

"please don't go after this person! now let me post this document for every single one of my followers and list every single one of their usernames"

[cannibalisticdespair]

[ineffable-gallimaufry]

can't access the wiki for taz on my phone for some reason but. i was looking at merles page and it was so fucking funny because there was a section about how he died each time that happened and the list was just

killed by john

killed by john

killed by john

killed by john

killed by john (more detail on why that was)

turned into a rock that one time

[totallyabsurd]

This is not even an exaggeration

[chaotic-archaeologist]

BREAKING NEWS: screenshots from your phone not an appropriate format for submitting work in college classes.

[json-derulo]

my partner was a TA for an intro-to-subject course in grad school. finals week rolls around and the students are required to submit this big module assignment they've had like a month to do for a decent chunk of their grade. if you've submitted everything, you'll see a summary screen with a star beside each module name showing it's been completed.

an hour before the assignment deadline, he receives an email from a student claiming they completed the assignment, but the system is not allowing them to submit. there's an image attached to the email. partner goes to open what he assumes is a screenshot of that summary page.

instead, he sees that the student has taken a photo of their laptop from about 2 feet away, with that page open. strange, but it wouldn't be the first time a college freshman has lacked the tech literacy to take a screenshot. he almost doesn't look twice at it, but he realizes something about it just feels a little bit...off. so he zooms in.

the student had CUT STARS OUT OF CONSTRUCTION PAPER and TAPED THEM TO THEIR LAPTOP SCREEN BESIDE EACH MODULE NAME. you could see where they actually had completed the first couple of modules, but the stars for all the subsequent ones were like, double the size of the first two and exactly as uneven/irregular as you'd expect if you were freehanding them with scissors.

probably would've been quicker and easier to just photoshop them in but no, this student took a refreshingly creative, arts-and-crafts approach to getting an academic misconduct case

[chaotic-archaeologist]

The one thing I will say for AI is that it's made me much more appreciative of homebrewed bullshit

[depsidase]

[partywithponies]

My woke take, as someone who has worked in both a public library and a school library, is that we desperately need both more books that are at a higher reading level but a less mature subject matter, and more books that are at a lower reading level but a more mature subject matter, because 8 year olds who are advanced readers are still 8 year olds and don't want to read about graphic violence and torture, and teens and adults who have learning difficulties or who are just later readers for whatever reason are still teens and adults and don't want to read about Billy the Bunny going to school or whatever the hell.

[partywithponies]

Shoutout to people in the notes also mentioning people learning the language, I should've mentioned that really, given that I've been stuck reading German picture books myself while learning German.

[rosedavid]

"You dropped this."

[aint-love-heavy]

I know we talk a lot about the literacy crisis and the horrible anti-intellectualism happening rn but I think we need to talk more about how much of an entitlement complex the stupidest among us have developed

[onemillionwordsofcrap]

Hey there other peopless children did you know that dictionary.com is a hamndy damndy website you can KEEP OPEN ON ANOTHSR FUCKING TAB

[zootycoon-archive]

i got these knockoff boots online and instead of the brand name on the tag they have the name of an apparently nonexistent martin scorsese movie??? what the fuck

[loseremo]

[syzygy-yzygy]

THE ORIGINAL? ON MY DASH

[this-too-too-sullied-flesh]

this post led to a series of events that had martin scorsese himself reacting to his alleged movie goncharov and it has less than 400k notes almost 3 years later?

[the-composite-doll]

@hellsite-hall-of-fame

[colemckenzies]

you can make nearly any object into a good insult if you put ‘you absolute’ in front of it

example: you absolute coat hanger

[ggiornojo]

as well u can just add ‘ed’ to any object and it’s sounds like you were really drunk

example: i was absolutely coat hangered last night

[colemckenzies]

#i was gazeboed mate #i was absolutely baubled

[animatedamerican]

Meanwhile, “utter” works for the first (e.g., “you utter floorboard”) but somehow “utterly” doesn’t seem to work as well for the second (“I was utterly floorboarded”).

[nentuaby]

Utterly doesn’t work for drunk because it’s the affix for turning random objects into terms for *shocked*, obviously.

[animatedamerican]

… huh.  I thought that might just be the similarity to “floored”, and yet “I was utterly coat hangered” does seem to convey something similar.

I have to tell you, I am utterly sandwiched at this discovery.

[thepioden]

Completely makes the phrase mean “super tired”.

“God, it’s been a long week, I am completely coat-hangered.”

[derinthescarletpescatarian]

Something is

Something is wrong with our language

[rooksandravens]

Is it a glitch or a feature?

[cranberrybogmummy]

Feature

[queer-here-and-in-fear]

shorthands for dumbassery that i have grown to love deeply

"how dare you say we piss on the poor" in response to someone misinterpreting your post

"_ isnt gonna fuck you" for suck up behavior

"woah. should we tell everyone? should we throw a party?" for who the fuck cares

"and what if the world was made of pudding" for when would this ever matter.

"and sharks are smooth both ways" for a group of people heatedly arguing with 1 guy who is fucking with them all

".. but its about a witch in the alps finding her lost cat" for someone trying to sanitize something to the point of absurdity

[queer-here-and-in-fear]

this is prime proof that this ENTIRE WEBSITE is autistic because nowhere else would a no tags post that's just an informative list about slang get this much traction.

[queer-here-and-in-fear]

anyway more addittions

“30-50 wild hogs” for someone making ABSURD excuses for violence.

“what were YOU doing at the devils sacrament” for how do you know that without being a part of it.

“anyone in this thread smoke weed” for the shit you people are saying is so off topic this might as well be a general discussion forum

“dogs are boys and cats are girls” for ooh ur mindset did not grow past 4th grade, huh

“color theory in a childrens hospital” for bending over backwards to not agree that YEA, that thing Came Off Weird

“you are a tar pit” for someone finding any reason to respond with outrage.

“is the __ in the room with us right now?” for I Don’t Think That’s Real.

“bean soup? im allergic to beans!” for ik this doesn’t work for you, but that’s not a flaw. not everything can be for you.

“people irl: hey man hows it going” for this will Never Matter irl

[i-say-spooky-you-say-scary]

Idk if these see much use on tumblr but I’m a huge fan of “Kim there’s people who are dying” and “everyone is 12” and I see “so you hate pancakes?” get used a lot on twitter