bluhhhh

I'm Ellie! I would love to meet new people! message me if you feel like it! 19 single I'm gay A.F. though cause....girls, amiright?

[1e3no]

[copperbadge]

#2, Brute?

[l-heure-du-the]

I made the ugliest noise.

[periegesisvoid-deactivated]

It’s not even March. It’s literally more than 6 months till the ides of March. Why.

[onemerryjester]

TODAY

[1e3no]

[copperbadge]

#2, Brute?

[l-heure-du-the]

I made the ugliest noise.

[periegesisvoid-deactivated]

It’s not even March. It’s literally more than 6 months till the ides of March. Why.

[onemerryjester]

TODAY

[onceiwashere]

i cant believe its daylight savings time and i havent seen the “hello its me your cousin oskaar from iceland” video on my dash yet you are all slackers

[onceiwashere]

i guess i have to do all the work around here dont i

[im-god-now-fight-me-deactivated]

things i always keep in my backpack: 

the bible (king james edition)

a copy of the U.S. consitution

a copy of my school’s current rulebook

i do this so that whenever someone at school tries to make a point and then defends it by saying ‘it’s in the constitution!’ or ‘it’s from the bible!’ or something else along those lines, i can pull out my own copy and say, ‘where exactly does it say that?’

also it’s just great to confuse people by pulling a fucking book of school rules out of nowhere in order to discuss what qualifies as a dresscode violation.

[im-god-now-fight-me-deactivated]

today during lunch a kid and i were debating the gender of god and he said “god’s a man in the bible” and i said “i’m pretty sure god is technically nonbinary or genderfluid, but let me check that” and i unzipped my backpack and the boy said “what’s she doing?” and my friend replied “she’s getting her bible” and i’m not sure how he felt when i set it down on the lunch table and flipped open to genesis but i definitely felt amazing.

[m3anint3ll3ctual]

op ur url says it all

[huntydraws]

We had to do Kinetic typography in class today. I chose a very important audio clip

[lordmegatroll-dicc]

this actually made me start to cry

[i-was-today-years-old-when]

i learned that the world record for the loudest thing ever shouted belongs to an Irish female teacher who shouted the word “quiet” at 121 decibels, the equivalent of a jet engine (x)

[theycallmedanismiles]

DISGUSTANG

[chlmera]

oh my god?

[adistraughtthought]

[questbedhead]

Okay please read this whole article because there is important information in ther, including;

1. She never yells at her students- her record breaking 121 decibel shout happened during an event she’d been invited to. She was defending her title after setting the previous shouting record during a competition at a church camp, where she got to 119.4 decibels 

2. The only reason she entered the first competition was because her twin sister had entered and was about to win with a shout of 119.1 decibels. 

3. They took her to an expert to try to understand how she shouted so very loud and his conclusion was that her supernatural volume was fueled entirely by her need to beat her sister. 

[miseducatedmelanicmuse]

[90stvqueen]

today i told my manager "just because i can handle anything doesn't mean i should have to" and if that isn't just the motto of my life

[sapphic-romeo]

Good tags OP

[90stvqueen]

it's the working class struggle!

[non-bender-world]

Can we consider how many people Toph caused internal bleeding and broken bones?

[comradekatara]

oh honey they are fully dead

[chemicalmagecraft]

No but Toph was a professional earthbending wrestler with the power to feel the whole human body at once through vibrations with enough accuracy to tell lies. She knows exactly how much pressure the human body can take before important things start breaking or I’ll go buy a hat for the sole purpose of eating it.

[comradekatara]

oh, sure. she doesn’t care though. she’s 12 and she’s thriving and she loves to murder

[caffeinewitchcraft]

Toph and Wednesday Addams have a lot in common

[liberal-memes]

[biglawbear]

Galaxy brain version of the woman who voted for the leopards eating people’s faces party

[lesbianshepard]

i kinda feel bad for oedipus b/c everyone assumes he chose to fuck his mom when in fact he went out of his way to avoid it. he left his hometown and distanced himself from his parents because he was afraid he would somehow get tricked into fucking his mom. everything could have been avoided if his adopted parents told him he was adopted.

[lesbianshepard]

someone: oedipus was fucked up like who fucks their own mother??? fucking weirdo.

me: it’s not his fault! he didn’t know!

[lesbianshepard]

also the point of the myth is supposed to show how despite your best efforts no mortal can thwart fate but also? what the fuck? the whole thing was an oracle telling laius that his son was going to murder him and fuck his wife. that shit came out of nowhere. he didn’t offend the gods or anything. they just decided for no reason other than the world is fucked up sometimes.

[lesbianshepard]

i have been informed that oedipus’ dad, laius, did in fact bring a curse upon himself for kidnapping and raping king pelop’s son chrysippus.

i stand by my stance that it’s still ridiculous to punish oedipus and jocasta for laius’s crimes. also why would the godss curse oedipus for fucking his mom when they tricked him into doing it in the first place? fucked up.

[the-cheshire-cat-grin]

You’re assuming the gods are ruled by logic and not by zeus nudging poseidon and saying “hey you know what would be so fucking funny”

[fangirltothefullest]

This is so accurate

[gaiusthegenius]

did u guys ever watch the BBC drama “Atlantis” where the main character is a modern guy who accidentally travels back in time to Ancient Greece

and tbh it’s full of him having moments where he realises this is a myth

like this woman comes to him and asks for help because her husband is trying to kill her baby so he helps her smuggle the baby out of the city to be taken in by another family and the other family ask the baby’s name and she says “Oedipus” and the guy is like

oh fuck

and then he meets a girl called Medusa and the whole time is just like shit shit shit then she goes missing and they track her to a cave and he is like “guys this is gonna sound weird but does anyone have a mirror”

BEST MOMENT  is he meets a guy who says “Hi I’m Pythagoras” and he blurts out “THE TRIANGLE GUY” and Pythagoras is just HEART EYES like “YES I LOVE TRIANGLES HOW DID YOU KNOW”

[ankle-beez]

oh

[ankle-beez]

Turning 6 and immediately hating barney the dinosaur is a childhood rite of passage so to say the least I'm curious to see how they'll tackle this befuddling multi-million dollar motion picture

[ankle-beez]

are we just. in the fucking twilight zone now

[frytheassandthighs]

[polysentimental-geometry-deacti]

[pulmonary-poultry]

We're always talking about gut-punches on this site but this is a fucking surprise roundhouse in the back of the head.

[catchymemes]

[mrbluerememberyou]

DAAaHRLINg,

[herefortherobutts]

I’m on the

HIGGHwAAAAy

route 8

…inbridgeport

[skittlebits]

Me, a modern day lesbian: I have no idea if this woman is into me

Anne Lister in 1832 after 3 minutes in the same room as a woman: She’s already half in love with me and I’m going to wife her

[j-sprrr]

god used up all the confidence-to-talk-to-women making anne lister and now the rest of us have to make do

[catchymemes]

This Guy Won’t Stop Photoshopping Himself Into Kendall Jenner’s Photos And It Makes Them 10 Times Better

Credit: Kirby Jenner / IG

via: boredpanda.com

[heatandapathy]

This is some god tier photoshopping.

[roachpatrol]

what continuously amazes me about the mcelroys is that justin looks like a gay elf, and travis looks like a portland barista who takes regular business trips to narnia. they both look like weird, cool, funny guys. but then griffin looks like if you hit ‘random’ on a character generator for a game exclusively about tax accountants. he looks like he was born with a polo shirt on. he looks like both his first and last names are jeff. he looks like he organizes socks for fun, and then he opens his mouth and says something funny enough that you rupture all your internal organs laughing about it. it’s incredible.  

[strawbebbynya]

i just want to say that the first time i saw griffin in the wwe monster factory video (i think), i was floored. i couldn’t believe my eyes. he was exactly like op says and i was not prepared for that at all and i was unable to process anything for days

[raulsquared]

[moonlightingcurse]

sorry but this is the funniest shit i’ve ever seen