Junk in the trunk

I'm Eli and I like fluffy things and pancakes he/him

[asleepinawell]

daily pep talk i give myself

[targetedknowledge]

[softest-punk]

I was literally running to a medical appointment because I was late but I had to stop to take this photo

[noah-wyles]

[wordfather]

idk if this is an usamerican thing or not but it always blows my mind as a small european country resident that yall have many names and types of apples???? what do you mean its not just red yellow or green??? why is it so complicated??? who is granny smith????

[wordfather]

'whats your favorite apple' 'red' 'no i mean like what type' '??????' actual conversatiom i've had with a mutual from usa

[wordfather]

THIRTY TWO??????

[phillyphillyphilly]

Listen that doesn’t even account for all the weird shit local farmers are getting up to.

May I present the best apple:

[wordfather]

the world is so big and beautiful

[soundclown]

[teethwreath]

[teashoesandhair]

I'm in a little local cafe and the women behind the counter started griping to each other, "Oh Christ, Stephen's back again," "It's him, is it? I thought he'd stopped coming," "It's definitely him, look, it's bloody Stephen on a Thursday morning," "Do you want me to get rid of him or are you going to do it?" and so I was peering outside, trying to spot this nightmare customer, this pestilence of a person, this pox upon the cafe trade, and then one of the women from behind the counter ran outside, clapping two trays together loudly and yelling "GET OUT OF IT, STEPHEN!" and it turns out that Stephen is an absolutely gigantic fuck-off seagull who hangs around outside, menacing people for crumbs

[messygoku]

this is so sexy

[pangur-and-grim]

trying to couch nap but they’re observing me

[madicham]

I wanted to draw them

[my-artblog-is-ssjumi]

their shapes are compelling

[dankxsinatra]

[roxylalonde]

[spitzonthefritz]

this is going around twitter rn but im also super curious: please tell me your top four comfort movies that you’re always down to watch bc my friend thinks mine are ridiculous and now we’ve realised everyone’s version of “comfort” is hilariously different

[thememedaddy]

[idontwanttoboldlygo]

This is one of the cutest Data momens IMO and I've never heard anyone talk about it

[redstonedust]

i understand why people are like "when are we ever gonna use this" about highschool classes, but personally i always kinda assumed it was more like. a taste test for the kids who do wanna use it? like maybe i dont need to reference atomic structure and the periodic table often in my daily life, but i assume there has to be at least one kid in my grade who was like "oh fuck this chemistry shit is awesome" and went on to be a chemist, yknow?

like i understand wanting more life skills to be taught in school and i agree, but i also think some people act as if the ONLY life skills are taxes and housework. do you want school to be a multi-year retail training course with a side of "how to fold bedsheets". that sounds lame as hell. i'll take the algebra thanks.

[sacred-portal]

[weloveshortvideos]

Guillotine vs a spray paint can.

[babyionian-deactivated20200611]

this caption is so deceptive, this video is so much more than that

[voldemo]

My friend really changed once she became a vegetarian 

[voldemo]

its like ive never seen herbivore

[crabanarchy]

They say ooooh be a good boy for daddy and you'll get a reward. But then the reward is just gay sex. This is bullshit. I wanted a skateboard

[crabanarchy]

Then they say if you're a bad boy daddy will punish you. But what's the punishment? More gay sex! You can't escape it. This whole damn place is in the pocket of Big Sex