Permission to Write

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[kinkyfemmequeer]

This isn’t just about porn

This isn’t just porn being deleted. @Tumblr was about a platform for Queer and LGBT+ expression. Where the community connected amongst each other on issues beyond gender. Where folx felt free to ask questions and explore themselves.

Queer porn and issues have little to no platforms; so to connect on a website where there is such a vast array of bodies, genders, queer smut, erotica; is a political stance.

NUDITY IS ART. Sex is art. People’s personal expressions of their bodies in a political climate that tells you to hide your body, shames sexual expression, and forces a binary identity IS ART!

The countless pages I came across of folx creating a safe haven for their transitions, thoughts, and connecting with other folx with similar stories and bodies—it has been a safe home. I can’t imagine how many lives it has saved.

This was my home to a queer getaway in a politically regressive world full of censorship. This was where I gained extraordinary knowledge of Queer politics, inclusivity, and further strengthening my intersectional feminism. This isn’t just about porn.

This is an act of violence against the queer community. @staff

[judelaw]

I love how their post says “A better, more positive Tumblr” as if female nipples are what’s ruining the experience on this website and not bullies, racists, homophobes and actual nazis

[oberynmartell]

[permissiontowrite]

So Tumblr is Zuccing Itself

If there's no "nsfw" content allowed on the site then who's even gonna be on here anymore???? This is the most literal interpretation of shooting oneself in the foot I have ever seen. Tumblr just closed itself down. I will not be deleting this blog, I have been here for years and nowhere else do I have a space that holds so much of my content, but I also won't be scrolling through for a while and I can't imagine many of my followers will be either. This tanks content, but more importantly, it's a huge and direct attack on sex workers and I can't stand that.

I'm here for the poems and fan art way more than for the porn and erotica but I am DEFINITELY here for that TOO and my FAVORITE thing about Tumblr was that I could access all of that in one timeline without having to search for it all separately.

AND THEN TUMBLR ZUCCED ITSELF.

[daddyslittleprincess118-blog]

romanticizing mental illness is dangerous and misleading

[restroom]

Artsy depression: haunted eyes, good at art, emo hair and eyeliner on point

Actual Depression: bloodshot eyes, no longer trust themselves with pencils, has not showered in five days

Quirky OCD: organized books, clean room, color coordinated outfits

Actual OCD: Intrusive thoughts, flipping the light switch 8 times so you don’t stab your brother, picking holes in your skin

Cute eating disorders: Slim trim and beautiful, shyly refusing a second helping, dancer aesthetic

Actual eating disorders: Puffy cheeks and eroded teeth from excessive vomiting, hair growing over your freezing body and refusing to eat carrots because they’re too high in carbs

Adorable anxiety: just a smol bean, soft, must be protected from the world

Actual anxiety: crying so hard you throw up, shaking, losing sleep over a period after the “okay”

RPG PTSD: flashbacks, vietnam, u don’t know what i’ve been through kiddo

Actual PTSD: Buying your first pregnancy test at twelve, flinching at high fives, i can’t feel my hands where am I what year is it

Cartoon ADHD: look a squirrel, something shiny, fidgety loveable bufoon

Actual ADHD: rereading the same page over and over because it doesn’t make sense, hasn’t done the laundry in four months, hyperfocusing on a mushroom knowing you have work to do

stop making terrifying realities seem cute. it’s disrespectful for those of us who are actually struggling

[opinionated-truscum]

Fucking preach.

[stop-stalin-and-suck-my-dick]

Uwu smol baby autism: adorably awkward, huggable, acts cute when confused, has some sort of rainman talent and a perfect memory in general

Real autism: worrying about whether you’re interpreting people’s cues correctly/making your tone sound correct for the context, or whether they’re about to get wierded out and uncomfortable bc of something you said, sensory issues that drive you nuts, not being able to adapt to sudden changes in plans and freaking out, melting down or shutting down when stressed by stupid things

[notsocuddlefish]

^

[marblesandbouncyballs]

Reblogging for the autism part that is just too real 

[c--o--l--o--r-moved-deactivated]

!!!

[permissiontowrite]

I love this and I want more for the "scary" ones, here's the two I have and write about

Movie schizophrenia: brilliant, never sleeps, solves impossible problems with the help of a friend that turns out to not exist

Actual schizophrenia: not sleeping for almost 48 hours because the wolf in your wall will kill you, finally crashing and waking up to remember this and softly groaning "oh no not AGAIN," never ever allowing yourself to own a weapon EVER

Movie borderline personality disorder: super edgy snarky "bad girl" who has great sex all the time and throws badass parties all the time and really just ~needs to be loved~ so she can ~accept herself~ and act "right"

Actual BPD: I love this person so much that it hurts, I am so thankful for them in my life, why haven't they texted me back yet, do they hate me, well fine then I hate them too, I'm going to delete their number, what if they're just asleep though, actually what if they're hurt, oh no they're hurt I need to call every hospital in this state until I find them

[just-shower-thoughts]

Dusting is when you wipe dust off of something. Dusting is also when you sprinkle powder on something. Dusting’s antonym is dusting.

[permissiontowrite]

Well damn

[goosewithajob]

If anyone tries to tell you that Shakespeare is stuffy or boring or highbrow, just remember that the word “nothing” was used in Elizabethan era slang as a euphemism for “vagina”. 

Shakespeare has a play called “Much Ado About Nothing”, which you could basically read in modern slang as “Freaking Out Over Pussy”. And that’s pretty much exactly what happens in the play. 

[kiralamouse]

It’s also a pun with a third meaning. There’s the sex sense of much ado about “nothing”, there’s the obvious sense that people today see, and then there’s the fact that in Shakespeare’s day, “nothing” was pronounced pretty much the same as “noting”, which was a term used for gossip. So, “Flamewar Over Rumors” works as a title interpretation, too.

The reason we call Shakespeare a genius is that he can make a pussy joke in the same exact words he uses to make biting social commentary about letting unverified gossip take over the discourse.

[ms-demeanor]

Hey, hey, hey, you’re forgetting the fourth thing, that noting (again, pronounced note-ing) was a pun on music NOTES and that’s why there’s a shitload of singing and dancing and puns about singing and dancing because Much Ado About Noting is basically Freaking Out Over Pussy The Musical: Gossip Making a Mountain out of a Molehill.

[justalurkr]

Today I learned

[permissiontowrite]

Self harm isn't suicide.

It's killing just enough of yourself so you can stay alive.

[mysharona1987]

[ask-frostiron-blog1]

Person: Your writing is so good!

Me:

[toboldlywrite]

You have been visited by the Thor of Positivity™! Take pride in your work and be confident in it! It may not be perfect but he knows you are working very hard and pouring your passion into it and therefore it is a Good Thing. 

[melifair]

THE THOR OF POSITIVITY SHALL NOW AND FOREVER MORE BE THE BEST THING EVER

[concerningwolves]

How do you become a writer? You lie. You tell a story, and you lie and lie and lie until you’re fluent.

You lie to your readers, making a story believable enough that they fall in love with a fiction. You tell them that everything will be okay, and tear their hearts to shreds. You give them just enough scraps to keep going, and hold the feast just out of reach. You tell them that you don’t want to let them have everything, and that is a lie too.

You lie to your characters, manipulate them, send them on journeys that will break them. You run rings around them, promise things that never come. You control them, plague them with monsters, send them spinning through terra incognita terrified and alone. You pretend not to care, but that’s a lie too.

The story also lies to you. Be ready. It did, after all, learn from the best. It tells you that you’re going down one path, and takes us in circles until we’re lost. It lies by omission, keeping the most important information until the end. It flays the creativity from your brain and refuses to co-operate. You pretend that your relationship with your story is complex and painful and in that, only part is a lie.

The story is a monster, a fae. Tame it as you will, but unlike a wolf it will never be made a dog. Quivering, it will curl in your lap like a cat, waiting for the right moment to bite the hand that feeds it. You nurture it anyway, you have to. You feed it with whispers and sleepless nights and tears. It won’t ever show kindness in return, but perhaps it will give gifts more freely.

And you keep lying, because telling a story is the most honest form of lying there is.

- On the nature and nurture of a story | A.r.t

[just-shower-thoughts]

“The only way to check your own work is to pretend it’s somebody else’s. and you want to get that bastard fired.”

[permissiontowrite]

This is actually solid advice though... 

[permissiontowrite]

You ever feel like nobody really sees you? I mean sees all of you, and accepts it, and can handle it? I've got sad-mode friends who will talk me off a ledge because I've done the same for them, but disappear when I get loud. I've got angry-mode friends who will call me into a protest and have supported mine, but are nowhere to be found when I just want to have fun. I've got happy-mode friends who will go see a movie with me or send me memes out of nowhere but disappear whenever I'm feeling ANYTHING. I feel like each type of friend ignores me whenever I'm in the other types of mindset. My friendships are basically built on whatever emotion it was that brought us together-- shared misery, shared rage, shared joy. Nobody ever wants all of me. Nobody ever even SEES all of me.  Sorry to whine I'm just feeling SUPER lonely and I'm not really sure what to do about it anymore because joining a club or cause or group only gets me that one-facet friendship. They don't make Crazy People Mixers where I can know everyone there feels things as intensely as I do, and/or won't run screaming if I casually mention my regular hallucinations. Hey, maybe I could MAKE there be a Crazy People Mixer event though... who's coming? 

[permissiontowrite]

DAILY ROUTINE: A GUIDE

I’m struggling a lot lately-- executive dysfunction, emotional dysregulation, you name it really. It helps to have a set plan, a to do list, goals; this is why I have so many chore charts and three different calendars and multiple bullet journals (what is my brain, why did I ever think putting any of it on paper would make sense, now there’s clutter in my head AND on my table). Anyway. Having all these tools to help me get uncluttered and unstressed is actually... rather stressful. I almost feel like I need a guide to get through my own day. Like, A daily pep talk, which also reminds me to do things like take medication and eat lunch, but also tells me I'm a badass, but also tells me I deserve to do things like take breaks during the day. Why doesn’t that exist? 

Well wait, I’m a WRITER, or at least I roleplay one on Tumblr. So why don’t I just WRITE that? 

So I did. I’ll post it in pieces by reblogging this so it’s all together. Maybe separately too, because it might be useful in pieces and also because I like attention in the form of notes, sue me. 

[majesticduxk-deactivated2018121]

So last week I tried moaning every time I ate something delicious.

It was vaguely uncomfortable and unnatural

[soupernabturel]

I actually love the idea of doing this trying out fanfic/literary cliche’s out in real life, kinda wanna make up a list and undertake it as a challenge.

[whitmerule]

don’t forget to make your butthole flutter today

[hazeldomain]

Guess someone’s eye color from 20 feet away.

[prairiedust]

Be careful with these. I started reading fanfiction three years ago and now I have to toe my shoes off to get my feet out.

[hazeldomain]

But do you pad across rooms? 

[prairiedust]

Yes but I often give away my position when I huff.

[mittensmorgul]

FYI, I’m smirking at all y’all.

[k-vichan]

I’m resisting the urge to card my fingers through everybody’s hair.

[dorkaelskunkworks]

This is as good a time as any to admit that right now I smell like coffee, sandalwood soap, and something uniquely myself.

[authorjcalamy]

I hate this post so much I clenched my fists and looked away, muscles bunching in my jaw. 

[bettsfic]

i’m so glad to see i’m not alone, i let out a breath i didn’t know i was holding

[sleepingreader]

I’m grinning widely at this

[defydamage]

I chuckled lightly upon reading this post.

[crollalanzaa]

I’m humming appreciatively.

[permissiontowrite]

I had to toss my hair over my shoulder and let it cascade down my back in flowing ringlets in order to read this properly. 

[permissiontowrite]

Would you believe I wrote something tonight?? It’s not all that great but I haven’t been able to write for M O N T H S so I’m really hoping this means something. 

[permissiontowrite]

Borderline Brain

Saturday night the best night of my life No such thing as drama or strife  New shirt, hair dyed, I’m looking fine as hell  Charismatic charm overflowing the well  Feeling so full I’m dancing down the street  Every stranger on the block a new friend to meet  

Don’t anyone panic, it’s just the borderline brain  Nothing to see here, just typically insane  Every moment is all that matters until you hit the switch  Then everything flips, it’s the borderline split  

Trip the wire (Grandiose delusion) Freak on fire  (Identity confusion) 

Sunday night and I’m going insane I ditch my friends, speed home in the rain  No moment can be still there’s no safe place  I want to launch myself into outer space  If I crash my car will I finally get some attention?  But what if the medic asks about my intention  

Don’t don’t don’t panic, it’s the borderline brain  Give it ten minutes, flip to the next frame  It’ll be over before you know what it’s about Don’t get too close, just wait it out

 Flip the switch (Black and white thinking) Take a hit  (This ship is sinking) 

[permissiontowrite]

I struggle with boundaries. I want to "save everyone." As an adult, it still gets me in trouble. As a teen, it got me and my friends bullied, stolen from, molested, and raped. And we were all told that it was our fault. That we asked for it. That we were too nice. Over and over. Grade school to grad school.

Don't you DARE tell students now that their MURDERS are on them. Don't you DARE tell them to roll over and accept this. Students need resources and counselors and textbooks and supplies and raises for teachers and laws that protect them. They aren't responsible for making that happen. It's EMBARRASSING that full grown adults are claiming this. Embarrassing, but not surprising-- if adults were listening to students, they wouldn't have needed to organize a national walkout in the first place.