Calamus Currentis

Take up the pen, for there is no heaven and death is soon.

[animentality]

[bigfoots-biggest-fan]

due to popular demand you can now stream the Slur Song for free without Spotify, using my new streaming service slurify.co

[batshit-auspol]

Pretty amazing that the website dedicated entirely to streaming slurs is somehow more ethical than spotify

[plumadesatada]

Incredible but ngl I miss the one with the party-er beat

[luciacaminoz]

my relationship with dragon age as a series is so twisted it’s like my ex-husband i divorced in the messiest way possible but i still have feelings for him nobody knows me like he does and we have occasional passionate love affairs still but also i daydream about killing him in his sleep quite often

[luciacaminoz]

hes lying next to me in bed my hands are shaking closing around his throat i cant see through the tears

[quietwingsinthesky]

friend is trying to convince me this is a common experience and I do not believe her, so

Do you expect to be paid back if you pay for something for your friend while you’re hanging out? (I.E. a ride, a meal, a trinket.)

Yes, always

Yes, but only if it’s above a limit of money

No, never

I don’t buy things for my friends.

bald button

Remaining time: 15 hours 12 minutes

For a more illustrative example, say you go to the movies with a friend and you buy them popcorn, do you expect them at some point to send you money back via cash or through an app of some kind? Will you be upset if they don’t?

[plumadesatada]

oh OP meant pay back in money my bad for not reading the whole thing

voted yes because I DO expect my friends to pay me back (for example by treating me to popcorn next time, or I dunno coming with me to the supermarket as An Activity, or dedicating an hour to listen to me Whinge And Complain), otherwise if you're aways the one paying for then (whether with money time or effort) I wouldnt call it a friendship

[lakevida]

free the nipple has to make a resurgence for a number of reasons but bro look at our upcoming eternity of wet bulb temps youre smoking straight up cock if you think im keeping a shirt on when it hits 105° in new england

[lakevida]

everyone tits out with a parasol is such a beautiful world to imagine that the fact it doesnt currently exist fills me with equal parts fire and misery

[leupagus]

by Resonant

I haven’t read this essay in… twelve years? I think? But someone (ETA: that someone was @whetherwoman who deserves the credit) linked it today and rereading it was a) a treat and b) honestly really helpful. If you, like me, want to write smut but often find it difficult, this essay may help a LOT.

[leupagus]

Reblogging this as I periodically do because it’s still relevant (especially with so many new writers coming into fandom spaces who are SO ENTHUSIASTIC but maybe need some pointers?) and because I myself need the reminder. Wherever you are, Res, I hope you’re doing great.

[petymology]

yay! Thanks, @leupagus !

The tips are on ao3 now, and I’m Res but on tumblr.

How To Write a Sex Scene (2619 words) by Resonant Chapters: 1/1 Fandom: Original Work Rating: Explicit Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Additional Tags: Meta, Don’t copy to another site, Writing Summary: Four tips for creating better sex scenes in erotic romance.

[leupagus]

omg

[spaceshipsandpurpledrank]

[zigdirty]

We're not leaving this gem to languish in the comments:

[shinraalpha]

titanic Wreckage perfec t size for put trillionaire in to n\ap! inside very Cool and Meme trillionaire look so sick put trillionaore in Titanic Wreckage. Put Trillionaore In Titanic Wreckage. no problems ever in titanicc wreckage because good Shape and Support for trillionaire ti visit in little snubmarine. Thetitanic Wreckage yes a place for a trillionaire put trillionaire in titanic wreckage can trust Mad Catz xbox controller for giveing good submarine control to trillionaire. friend titanic wreckage

[ingridverse]

no pressure

[shinraalpha]

*some* pressure

[nordreys]

james ortiz provided some of his own personal rocky backstory on the sag aftra podcast, transcribed by me because we all have to be miserable about it together.

link to the podcast, this section below is from timestamp 24.35

“andy weir provided a packet to the creature shop that was like a packet of eridian biology and stuff but there wasn’t much about eridian culture or eridian sociology and i made a bunch of choices going in because i just needed to have like a ‘who am i?’ right? 

[…] and i made a decision that rocky’s species, that eridians are really social animals that in fact are like a beehive or a pod of dolphins - it’s a unique and really integrated ecosystem of everybody doing their [specific] part. and the fact that rocky had to fly that ship for about 45 years - longer than grace has been alive, i wanna point that out - he’s been alone on that ship, having to run that by himself and- ryan and i would talk about that, one day we sat down and he was like “so what’s the movie from rocky’s perspective?” and i was like “oh it’s like ‘alien’, […] like he’s in a ‘contagion’ movie by himself and he has no idea what’s going on.”

he’s basically in castaway by himself which of course ryan is too but like, one reason why we never cut to the past of rocky is like, i think it was really horrifying! i don’t think rocky has slept in however many years and so a thing i was really struggling with is this idea of like “rocky must watch sleep” because how do you make that a need as opposed to like, a cute idea? and i just had to make the decision that […] he has a lot of unprocessed trauma around the things that he doesn’t understand and how much he is blaming himself because he’s the guy who fixes, he’s the guy who fixes and there was something really freeing about deciding that rocky was a deeply emotional, deeply anxious, deeply horrified person - being - that is trying to move through that in some way and how that affects the early scenes with him until there’s a point in the story where you can see we’ve physically softened rocky’s behaviour, because he’s finally feeling more safe and ok but all of that lore, all of that information [was essential].

i also decided, this is just a small nerdy thing, that there was actually some of his family, was on that ship too.”

[victusinveritas]

Do other countries not tailgate? I mean I know pickup trucks aren't a thing everywhere, but they're not a necessity, even if you'd think you need a tailgate to actually tailgate. Ya don't. Just brews and brats and buds.

[likegodapple]

Off the back of a quick search: The Foxborough stadium there and the largest stadium in Scotland, Celtic Park, have about the same seating capacity, about 65,000.

The Foxborough stadium normally has 20,000 parking spaces.

Celtic Park has 800, with another 600 nearby.

You might not need tailgates, but you do need to be parking there.

[victusinveritas]

I forgot, somehow, how much of America is paved (and mostly empty most of the time), especially near stadiums. Thanks for doing the research!

[wtf-scientific-papers]

Wang and Lai (2014)

[gemstone-gynoid]

[plumadesatada]

You've seen "this videocall could have been an email", now get ready for: "this figure could have been a sentence"

[ryebreadgf]

the sexiest thing a woman can be is a cringe fujoshi with a very serious day job

[ryebreadgf]

fujoshis with serious day jobs have skills and competencies you can only dream of

[femmepathy]

sourdough STOPPER. fuck ur bread.

[galacticgoldfishart]

Sometimes i save little gems and forget about them

[chubbbybunnie]

For those who want the pic

[legolokiismighty]

i spent longer than i care to admit on this

[animentality]

[freakytikigifs]

Ryan Gosling and James Ortiz as Ryland Grace and Rocky PROJECT HAIL MARY

[bugsnbites]

Picture it. Decades after the world is saved, a huge alien spacecraft touches down on earth.

Scientist, politicians, and thousands of reporters gather to witness the aliens disembark the ship. A group of boulder-like creatures, clicking and whistling to the humans around them.

One of them raises something large and metallic towards the crowd.

There's an immediate recoil of fear (is it a weapon?!) before the audience realises it's human technology. A laptop, old and beaten and looks like it was put back together by a drunk.

The alien presses a button.

"Hello Earth, this is Doctor Captain Ryland Grace. These guys are Eridians and they're here on a shopping trip. I have a list and no money, but I did save the world so that has to count for something. Number one, salt and vinegar chips. Actually anything potato. Number two, I miss apple juice. Number three,"