poop/boob

gai

[hypokeimena]

remember when you could find websites that contained information

[kelebek-gibi-deactivated2025100]

[unbotheredmuse]

[swarnpert]

you know that quote "when you have a hammer everything looks like a nail" bc that's how i feel whenever i have a lysol wipe in my hand

[nosebleedclub]

Tell me a soft memory

[lifeofbrybooks]

My oldest brother is 10 years older than me.

When I was in first grade, he took me shopping for new school clothes — which was huge because, as the youngest of six kids, I lived in hand-me-downs.

He bought me a little navy blue, polka dot dress with a Peter Pan collar and red alphabet buttons. But, on picture day, I lost one of the buttons on the playground. I had a total meltdown because my brother spent his own money to make sure I had this new dress and I ruined it. I was a mess, totally inconsolable.

My teacher was also the mom of one of my brother’s best friends. She told him, and he, my brother and the entire football team searched the playground after practice for my lost button. Which they actually found.

My brother sewed the button back on himself in the car all while trying to explain that he wouldn’t have been mad even if I did lose it.

It was just a button and a dress.

But I did have one of those little red alphabet buttons sewn into my wedding dress.

[badsciencejokes]

Dude has a death wish

[vergess]

Delighted to announce this bird is real and is a corvid.

Truly the family that just keeps giving.

[haropla]

I haven’t seen it in the notes yet, so afaik, here’s the source of that video! So now you can see the funny poison bird much more clearly.

It was taken by a biologist that studies birds so it seems like he knows what he’s doing. For the most part. Here’s his caption:

[krystal-prisms]

You all know that he 100% licked his fingers after handling that bird

[totally-original-artist]

[sapokanikan]

kate BUSH. not kate SHAVE. something to think about..............

[moondusttown]

I hope my absence haunts you.

-Six Word Story | achelei

[edenkillsr0ckstars-deactivated2]

Fml

[torksmith]

society if we could annotate spotify playlists

[paper-mario-wiki]

the main thing that puts me off of playing chess is that there is 2000 years of gameplay that hundreds of people with higher IQs than me have spent thousands of hours studying the history of, so much so that when i put the pawn forward they say “ah i see youre going for the bulgarian somersault” and then i try to take their bishop with my knight and they go “aw, rookie mistake, youve played the frenchmans cumsock, and in approximately 37 moves i’ll have won”

[jewishpangolin]

[xsarora]

[girthakitt-blog]

i like this guy

[pussymargiela]

[jupitersmusings]

good things will happen 🧿

things that are meant to be will fall into place 🧿

[overlord-fire-bubble]

THIS ONE FUCKING WORKS. REBLOG IT.

[illinicoise]

“But if you forget to reblog Madame Zeroni, you and your family will be cursed for always and eternity.”

[spn-fandom-breathing-heavily]

not even risking that shit

[codyslipring-deactivated2015060]

scrolled past this, re-evaluated my life, then SCROOOLLLED back up and hit the damn reblog button. 

[tumblgang]

She ain’t no games in real life so I take her serious all the time

Anyone with a name that starts with a “Z”, ends with an “i”, and isn’t some kind of Italian pasta, IS SERIOUS

I’m not climbing no mountain with a pig on my back, 🙅🏽🙅🏾🙅🏿 Negative.

[skuubasally]

Nope. I know better, have your reblog Madame Zeroni.

[luckytaters]

who the fuck is Madame Zeroni

[saudadesinfinitas-deactivated20]

Look at these stupid children who don’t know who Madame Zeroni is

[drayaintshit-deactivated2019030]

☝🏾😂

[callmedeku24]

Man lissen if you don’t know you better ask somebody AFTER you hit the reblog button

[emeraldmercury]

Idk who she is but I have an exam today so I’ll reblog her

[haiku-robot]

idk who she is but i have an exam today so i’ll reblog her

^Haiku^bot^0.4. Sometimes I do stupid things (but I have improved with syllables!). Beep-boop!

[jacobmick]

Because wise, I am.

[seymonecristina]

Oh fucks no she’s back lmao must reblog. I’m sorry guys

[whorderofthepheonix]

I tried to scroll past twice and I couldn’t. Fuck this website man.

[itsstillsweetiebythealtar]

I’m sorry yall but I’m too superstitious

[sonatacunt-deactivated20211212]

anyone know that reddit post about a girl who’s gf washes her hair and it talks about non sexual intimacy

found it :)

[evening-moon-rising]

My heart..

[topaz-stars]

This reminds me of this post;

Forgive me guys as I do not remember where the screenshot is from, but I have it here and I wanted to share with you.

[time-travel-toke-up]

I have had guy friends cry because I enthusiastically asked to do their hair in plaits. I have shave my head out of hair frustration a lot but I loved braiding my own hair. like, crown braid casually during a test instead of a ponytail when I needed my hair off my face type speed braiding. and I have a lot of guy friends with that long flowy Viking hair. gal friends love me doing their hair, paid me to do it for prom and shit, so I started asking my male friends to plait their hair like a viking. I stg, some have cried. some freeze like a internet explorer tab.

and this is a thing we just DID at sleepovers to each other as girls! I am used to this level of “let me get uncomfortably close and bond with you” monkey type grooming. it breaks my heart when I compliment a man or offer a sincere “that’s fucked bruh” bear hug and they hesitate or seem to look for a trick. y'all be touch starved and get shit when you try and seek it from anyone in a non sexual context, how is this not a set up for unhealthy thoughts about self worth?

[ruimtetijd]

How many times do I have to say this, the first post’s OP is a GUY. Stop erasing men’s experiences with intimacy.

[ruimtetijd]

ALSO HE MADE ANOTHER POST ABOUT MAKING HIS GF PANCAKES!!!!

transcript:

My girlfriend had a really long week and was tired. I know she likes pancakes and chocolate so I wanted to surprise her with chocolate chip pancakes for breakfast in bed on her day off. I snuck out of bed early and I followed the directions on the box exactly, but i was worried the batter was going to be too thick with the chocolate chips so I added a bit more milk. Then it was too runny so I had to add more flour, then it was way too thick. So I didnt want to water it down anymore and said fuck it, but then they werent cooking properly. I also tried to make a heart with the chocolate chips but between the thickness of the batter and geberal spatula fuckery they came out more like scrambled pan muffin egg cakes and there was no heart.

You guys, her face just lit up and she was so happy with my pancake mess. She kept putting her fork down to kiss me and the way she looked at me… like its weird to type but I really feel like im something, or like im SOMEBODY you know. It was that same feeling where, I guess I felt really proud of myself for doing something like that, I mean I was pretty shy cause they weren’t nice pancakes but she said I made her happy….

I’m sorry for posting this here again. I just really dont have an outlet where i can talk about romantic stuff like this, people around me arent about that kind of thing but really, being with her and doing these nice gentle things…

I love her. It just feels good.

[meme-loving-stuck]

Reblogging for the extra addition that op was a man experiencing intimacy and genuinely being emotional & shocked by it, since every time I added that it got ignored 🙄

[juliamccartney]

[stuckinapril]

oh u read the book i recommended u

come kiss me now