you: Oh no I can't write this, my writing is too generic and derivative, it's all just a copy of a copy of a copy with nothing original or unique to it. I suck and I have no original touch.
also you: Oh no I can't write this, my writing is too self-indulgent and tailored to only please my own specific preferences and interests. It's too weird and perverse and nobody else writes weird shit like this. I suck and I must be more normal.
morning hot coffee and afternoon iced coffee are two separate entities. morning hot coffee is your state sanctioned substance abuse to get low level drugs in your body. afternoon iced coffee is a sweet treat that has no impact on your physical body but will boost morale. you can have 8 thousand iced coffees and it will never negatively effect you
neocities guide - why you should build your own html website
do you miss the charm of the 90s/00s web where sites had actual personality instead of the same minimalistic theme? are you feeling drained by social media and the constant corporate monopoly of your data and time? do you want to be excited about the internet again?
try neocities!!
what is neocities?
neocities is a free hosting website that lets you build your own html website from scratch, with total creative control. in their own words:
"we are tired of living in an online world where people are isolated from each other on boring, generic social networks that don't let us truly express ourselves. it's time we took back our personalities from these sterilized, lifeless, monetized, data mined, monitored addiction machines and let our creativity flourish again."
why should I make my own website?
web3 has been overtaken by capitalism & conformity. websites that once were meant to be fun online social spaces now exist solely to steal your data and sell you things. it sucks!!
building a personal site is a great way to express yourself and take control of your online experience.
what would I even put on a website?
the best part about making your own site is that you can do literally whatever the hell you want! focus on a specific subject or make it a wild collection of all your interests. share your art! make a shrine for one of your interests! post a picture of every bird you see when you step outside! make a collection of your favorite blinkies! the world is your oyster !!
here are some cool example sites to inspire you:
recently updated neocities sites | it can be fun to just look through these and browse people's content!
space bar | local interstellar dive bar
creature feature | halloween & monsters
big gulp supreme
peanutbuttaz | personal site
dragodiluna
linwood | personal site
patho grove | personal site
getting started: neocities/html guide
sound interesting? here are some guides to help you get started, especially if you aren't familiar with html/css
sadgrl.online webmastery | a fantastic resource for getting started with html & web revival. also has a layout builder that you can use to start with in case starting from scratch is too intimidating
web design in 4 minutes | good for learning coding basics
w3schools | html tutorials
templaterr | demo & html for basic web elements
eggramen test pages | css page templates to get started with
sadgrl background tiles | bg tiles
rivendell background tiles | more free bg tiles
fun stuff to add to your site
want your site to be cool? here's some fun stuff that i've found
blinkies-cafe | fantastic blinkie maker! (run by @transbro & @graphics-cafe)
gificities | internet archive of 90s/00s web gifs
internet bumper stickers | web bumper stickers
momg | gif gallery
99 gif shop | 3d gifs
123 guestbook | add a guestbook for people to leave messages
cbox | add a live chat box
moon phases | track the phases of the moon
gifypet | a little clickable page pet
adopt a shroom | mushroom page pet
tamaNOTchi | virtual pet
crossword puzzle | daily crossword
imood | track your mood
neko | cute cat that chases your mouse
pollcode | custom poll maker
website hit counter | track how many visitors you have
web revival manifestos & communities
also, there's actually a pretty cool community of people out there who want to bring joy back to the web!
melonland project | web project/community celebrating individual & joyful online experiences. Also has an online forum
melonland intro to web revival | what is web revival?
melonking manifesto |
status cafe | share your current status
nightfall city | online community
onio.cafe | leave a message and enjoy the ambiance
sadgrl internet manifesto |
yesterweb internet manifesto | sadly defunct, still a great resource
reclaiming online social spaces | great manifesto on cultivating your online experience
in conclusion
i want everyone to make a neocities site because it's fun af and i love seeing everyone's weird personal sites that they made outside of the control of capitalism :)
say hi to me on neocities
New favorite activity: throwing different star wars characters through time at kamino and the clones like pieces of salami to feral cats
In a totally unrelated note, au where when the skywalker twins were about 8/9 they were, somehow through all the space between them, throwing a typical kid meltdown at the same time.
The reason? They really really really REALLY wanted siblings. They are just always so bored and its hard making friends and and and. So they cry and scream and demand a sibling from their parents/aunt&uncle.
Only, the skywalker twins arent regular kids. They are weird force eldritch children and so the force answers them like "omg PLEASE SHUT UP yall so loud! Fine!!! You want siblings? Ohhhh ill give ya siblings" (idk the force just gives be exhausted sngle mother vibes with god lke powers)
And then POOF the twins are on kamino surrounded by clone cadets.
Of course the clones hide these clearly baby jedi (random children appearing out of thin air... thats probably something baby jedi can do) from the kaminoans. It takes a WHILE for the twins to realize they most likely arent going back to their families. They get depressed for a while. But the twins understand eachother and their circumstamces so they get close like actuall twins and they help eachother move on and accept their new home... and their new 5 million siblings.
The clones (mainly the alphas and the CC clones who are the oldest) take care of, hide and teach the twins. They teach them what they are being taught: how to shoot a blaster, strategy, survival. They also teach them mandoa, and the importance of armor amd paint.
They also try really hard to teach them about the jedi, but what the clones learn about the jedi is all horribly over exagurated stereotypes but they are trying! They are taught very well mental shielding so thats a plus.
The twins eventually find omega, and they become bffs as well. They dont like boba. They pull pranks on him and jango and are NEVER caught. Boba thinks the place is haunted.
When the war starts, the twins are like "yeah fuck you we're coming with ya (they are like 18/19) so they steal some shiney armor and vow to help protect their brothers. So they follow thier favorite vod off Kamino.
Leia of course follows Fox to coruscant amd the senate. Shes as cunning and ruthless as fox. If the "trooper's" height is ever questioned, the clone with her is trained to say "ah growth hormone defect. But hes too good at paperwork to decommission" and most senators are all "oh haha i have a few aide i feel exactly like that about. Carry on!" Leia even convinces Palpatine to let her do all his paperwork (she has a voice changer in her helmet) not cause she trying to be nice or helpful, because she has a bad feeling about him and what better way than to know all his buisness than by doing all his paperwork?
Luke follows both Rex and Cody around like a little duckling. Well actually it more like Cody and his two little ducklings. Obi-Wan definitely knows something is up, but he is too scared of overstepping the already very limited personal autonomy with clnes so he just lets it be. Luke would def act as a crazy battle ready medic. Hes still very bendy and flippy, takes after a lot of tbe CCs and punches, kicks and bites droids, only he has the force on his side so he isnt at risk of breaking any bones ot teeth.
(Now i really wanna design clone armor paint designs for leia and luke)
Dont imagine leia seeing bail in the senate and remembering a distant father. Desperately wanting to hug him and be held by him and cry and scream. Instead falling into the embrace of the vode.
Dont imagine luke hearing about "general skywalker" and being so excited to meet someone with his last name. Only to have to fight and stuggle to keep the mans overwhelming force signature out of his mind with beskar shields. He can feel the light, he can. but its overshadowed by growing dark and he feels cornered anytime they are in the same vicinity.
One of my big breaks with star wars canon is that I fully think that, even with hyperlanes, they should need several weeks to get from the outer rim to Coruscant. I will write that trip as taking Forever unless people are using restricted tech (military) or breaking the law (Han Solo).
I can accept a midpoint btw. The military can take a few days but the freight travel should be weeks.
But like... it should take as long to get a superfreighter from Tatooine to Coruscant as it does to get a container ship from Japan to Ireland (48 days).
I want to imagine that they (the cargo ships) are also more dangerous at FTL speeds so they have dedicated slow lanes. Extra wide for safety, with really long "exit ramps" so they can accel/decel out without hitting anyone. We want to avoid an accidental Holdo Maneuver.
There are also emergency lanes that are kept clear for, well, emergencies. It's not like you can DODGE in a hyperlane. You can't pull over to let the emergency ships speed past you.
So. Service lanes.
So you have the extra slow lanes for freight/cargo/other huge liners.
"Normal" lanes for personal or small group transports.
And emergency lanes for the military, relief aid, political officials, etc.
So the military gets there in two days (ftl equivalent of Mach speeds), solo travelers get there in anywhere from one to three weeks (you can pay for the faster lanes, but it's restricted for safety; bounty hunters usually pay for the faster lane).
And the giant cargo ship is going to take two months. Because fuck you, transportation is such a crucial element of SO MANY TRADE ISSUES, you can't just whittle it down. It needs to be a pain in the ass. You gotta make it suck.
#I totally agree #the interesting thing about galactic level trade is its sheer scale too #hyperlanes donât connect every single planet- itâs totally feasible that to get from planet A to planet B #youâll have to drop out of hyperspace like 4 times to pick up another lane #like how you have to change highways to get from city A to city B #I like to think that each time the freighters drop out of hyperspace they have to go through planetary customs too #like how trucks on the road have to periodically pull over for weigh in stations #so a trip you could make in a week gets an extra day and a half worth of time #spent waiting in lines for customs and whatnot (via @katrina-loves-birds)
You get it!
In this vein... who here has spent hours upon hours watching logistics videos by Wendover Productions?
Just a subtle reminder that whenever I say that Jedi should leave the republic and live on Mandalore itâs not so they can leave their culture behind. They should take their culture with them. Go live on Mandalore with another warrior culture and mesh and also everyone does dumbass stunts and they are both protected from the Republic who historically does nothing but hurt both their cultures. Also they all go on relief missions and the AgriCorps helps their planets thrive again and also both Mandos and Jedi fight over who gets this foundling because all of them want it. Everyone is a parent or parented or a dumbass baâvodu.
I donât mean that either culture should leave their way of life behind. Let them mesh. Let them bring cultural dishes to each otherâs homes and everyone is happy. Idk man.
I have returned. With a Life Day song! In Mando'a!
This is what happens when I have far too much free time on my hands and an urge to dive buy'ce first back into the Mandalorian fandom. A recording of me doing a poor job at singing the song is at the bottom.
Inspiration: Uhhhh...Mariah Carey's Christmas songs, Tasogare no Bay City, and Mayonaka no Door/Stay with Me.
In world background for this song: I'm thinking it's kind of an older song, probably an age/notoriety equivalent of any Christmas song released in the 1990s on our planet. It was moderately popular on Manda'yaim and among Mando'a speakers, but surprisingly popular among Basic speakers (kind of similar to what happened with Feliz Navidad or even Stay with Me). It's rarer to hear these days, but you can still find a few people who will call it their favorite.
Lyrics:
Cyare come home
Come home cyare
Cyare come home
Come home cyare
âSuâcuy garâ
A, ni nakarâmir
Meh ibac haat
ibIâtuur
Gar payt ni
Suâcuy gar
A, shi taabâechaajâla
Oâr ni karta
Cyare come home
Come home cyare
Cyare come home
Come home cyare
Gar sirbur âDarasuumâ
Bal payt par nakarâtuur
Cinâciri bat ner âgam
A, ni nâechoylir
Oyaâtuur olar
Ni nâechoylir
Oyaâtuur olar
Ni nâechoylir
Cyare come home
Come home cyare
Cyare come home
Come home cyare
Translation:
âHello/Youâre still aliveâ
But, I donât know
If that's true
Today
You left me
Youâre still alive
But, you are marching far awayÂ
In my heart
Cyare come home
Come home cyare
Cyare come home
Come home cyare
You said âEternityâ
And left for the unknown day
Snow on my armor
But, I wonât search for you sadly
Life day is here
I wonât search for you sadly
Life day is here
I wonât search for you sadly
Cyare come home
Come home cyare
Cyare come home
Come home cyare
I also did a poor job a singing this, but if you want to hear how to sing it, then you can listen to it here- https://soundcloud.com/werlaara/cyare-come-home?si=5d54f76209a74b9d808053ff0af23320&utm_source=clipboard&utm_medium=text&utm_campaign=social_sharing
I am no nutrition expert but I do have a pretty damn good track record of keeping myself alive, so I want to remind you all that "fed is best" also applies to adults. There's nothing you could eat (that has been deemed fit for human consumption, I don't mean asbestos you smartass) that would be worse for you than just straight-up not eating. No food is as bad as no food.
A protein bar isn't the best possible source of protein in your diet, but it's better than not getting that protein. Fresh fruits would be better than orange juice, but if your choices are between having the orange juice and not getting the vitamins at all, you drink the fucking orange juice.
If you were out at winter while barefoot, and your options were between wrapping random newspaper around your feet, or not having anything to protect your feet, you wouldn't think "newspapers are a worse option than proper shoes, therefore I shouldn't take this worse option" and go barefoot.
So for a nomadic people accustomed to being able to make do with the ABSOLUTE minimum, I would assume Mandalorian kitchen implements are going to be basic. The words we have in Mando'a that refer to them also refer back to armor- helmet and pot, plate and frying surface, etc.
I have some experience with camp cooking. The same pot you use for boiling will probably go towards baking. You really just need a Deep Vessel and a Flat Surface to make just about anything you want. You're just limited by what fuel source you've got for the kind of heat you'll have- hot and fast fires are things you can flash-fry on, but not bake, for example. Boiling, at least, will never fail you, so soup is always on the menu. More on that later.
I have a thought that at home, slow-cookers and griddle surfaces are king. What would be lacking, that we Earth natives might find strange, would probably be the bakeware. Not baking- surely Mandalorian homes have ovens, which can conveniently double as dehydrators. No, I mean all the fancy things for pastry work. We're accustomed to cake tins, pie tins, casseroles, cookie cutters, muffin tins, etc. Mandalorians would likely just use the same implements for different purposes. One or two good sized baking dishes or sheets will make a multitude of things. Nothing is stopping you from baking a rectangular pie in your 9Ă13. Nothing is stopping you from baking "muffins" in that same tim all in a big rectangle and cutting it into servings, or baking it in pucks like extra fluffy cookies.
But things that would really dominate in Mandalorian cooking? Boiling. Dumplings, noodles, soups, stews. There is a REASON for this, and it is that water regulates temperature really really well. It boils at one temperature under our atmosphere's pressure and has wicked high specific heat, so an unreliable fuel source is less of a problem. So the stock pot in a Mandalorian household and camp alike would see a lot of use.
Mandalorian kitchens would also have ample pantry space- there would be cold storage at home, yes, but also shelf-stable staples, like flours and beans, dried milk, cooking fat, gihaal and other meat meals and extracts used like bouillon. A highly anachronistic space, indicative of the Mandalorian resistance to relying on goods and services that could be taken away.
To summarize:
To cook like a Mandalorian, you really only need a big skillet or griddle, some kind of large boiling vessel with a lid, and heat. That's all you need to get started. You can even make bread that way- flatbreads are almost always baked on a griddle or pan, not an oven. But for the most part, I hope you like soup.
affirmations for writers: i know how to write. i have seen sentences before, and i know how to make one. i can identify up to several words and their meanings. i am not afraid of semicolons.
I have a particular philosophy that I'm going with for my Mandalorian culinary inventions, and that is that spicy things need dimension. Capsaicin is just one of many spicy chemicals you can achieve heturam (mouth-burn) with. There's also gingerol, piperine, and isocyanthins. And whatever mouth-numbing nonsense is happening with sichuan pepper.
I also famously have a capsaicin intolerance, so going easy on the hot peppers is going to be a signature of my particular clan's recipes.
But to make a spice blend Mando-style, you're going to want to blend peppercorns, hot peppers, and some kind of spicy root to make your powders and pastes, plus something for extra flavor, whether it's smoky or citrusy or herbal. My adaptation of the above spice blend as a paste is as follows:
Clan Kelmar'e Spice Paste
4 tablespoons of fresh ginger root, peeled
6 cloves of garlic (minimum)
2 tsp whole coriander
1tsp whole cumin
Lemon zest
Ancho chile powder, 1-2 tablespoons, or equal amount of dried ancho chile
Smoked paprika, equal amount
Sichuan peppercorns, equal amount
Sumac, 1 tablespoon
Coarse salt
Black or white pepper
MSG, a few pinches
Grind together in a mortar and pestle or process in a food processor until it forms a thick paste. Moisten with lemon juice if it is too dry. Store in the refrigerator.
We have peppercorns (sichuan and regular), a spicy root (ginger, but if you want to use horseradish or wasabi, go for it), hot pepper (ancho in my case, but babe, if you can handle the hotter ones, then You Do You), and extra aromatics. Mix and match to your heart's content and Do Not forget to add some kind of acid to help release the flavors. When you cook with this, add it directly to the hot oil to bloom the spices.