bumbled be thy bees

est. 2012 | 27

[omtai]

The lion lowkey concerns himself a little bit

[kosmogrl]

[ccstcrptc]

Demi’s twin sister. She was locked in a basement her whole life. This picture was taken the first time she went outside. Her name is Poot.

[dogsuffrage]

I remember people talking about how this post was problematic because people actually get locked in basements and therefore finding this funny makes you a bad person. And I lowkey agreed

[paleolithique]

i need people to know that demi dressed up as poot for halloween this year

[byjove]

2025 boyfriend: I have been DMing instagram models and purchasing their OnlyFans content with money from our shared bank account. Also, I am a high value redpilled male and you should work your ass off for crumbs of my affection.

Iron Age boyfriend: help girl they’re cutting my nipples off with a ceremonial knife and throwing my bound corpse into a bog

[byjove]

2025 boyfriend: Despite cheating on you and leeching off you for 6 months, I am going to have a screaming crying breakdown when you try to leave me and piss myself and get so very angry when you call my mom to come get me.

Iron Age boyfriend: the crops would not grow, they are saying I have displeased the gods, this is the only way to save the people, my blood will sate this land I have dishonored. also I have 6 parasites and 3 serious infectious diseases so I was going to go soon anyway I think.

[byjove]

I’d like to issue a public apology for not making it clear I have never had a boyfriend from the Iron Age and this post is a hypothetical creative work about the stark differences in quality of life and dating culture in 2025 and 2 thousand years ago in Iron Age Ireland. I am so sorry for not clarifying that and potentially spreading misinformation about the 6’6" Irish dreamboat that must have been the Old Croghan Man.

[myzornaccount]

Now I know you're lying. There's no way an Irish could be 6'6"

[byjove]

Rude. Also, the crazy height estimate on Old Croghan Man isn’t so bizarre within the context of other Iron Age Irish bog mummies. Cashel Man and Gallagh Man were also very tall for prehistoric humans. Not sure what was going on in Ireland but there were a lot of tall 20 something guys being thrown in bogs ritualistically for several thousand years.

[candydandyorsomething]

there’s no tall irish men anymore because they were all taken by The Bog

[byjove]

Hozier is 6'6" because he crawled out of the bog after being placed in there in the late Iron Age.

[elodieunderglass]

(They let him keep his nipples.)

[beardedmrbean]

[marleencrossing]

animal crossing ~ (113)

[busket]

sometimes I think about how rattlesnakes are starting to adapt to bite immediately instead of using their rattle as a warning, because this defense mechanism that says "im here! im frightened! don't come close or ill bite you" has instead ilicited a reaction of "oh fuck a rattlesnake, i should kill it"

so of course every snake that has the instinct to warn humans of its presence gets killed, and only the snakes that bite first and dont make themselves known get to survive. a human who's been bitten is too worried about his swelling ankle to decapitate a snake with a shovel.

it's a good example of how humans make the world more dangerous for ourselves by believing that we have mastery and ownership of it. we think we have the power and importance to control the life around us down to the snakes and insects, but every animal fights for life. and no animal thinks that any human is more important than it's own life.

[homunculus-argument]

A video game where the whole concept is that you're in a city, and you've got a pressure washer. You can pressure wash anything. Just pick a random object, wall, car, pavement, statue, go "hmm, I wonder what colour that thing used to be?" and then you just run the washer over it, slowly and neatly and not missing a spot, very calm, very soothing, very relaxing. If you aim it at people, they get mad at you. If you aim it on squirrels or very small dogs they explode. People don't like that either. If enough people get mad at you, the cops will start chasing you. You're fine for as long as they don't catch you. If you find a good hiding spot, they give up looking for you eventually. You can pull up a manhole cover and hide in the sewer. Chilling there for a bit. Pressure washing the walls. Pssshooooom.

[homunculus-argument]

The start of the story of rapunzel is really goddamn funny if you're aware that the name refers to a type of leaf salad. Like imagine a pissed off witch shows up like who took my fucking cabbage, give me my shit back, and you're like oh please have mercy my wife is pregnant and we are very poor and she was craving that salad so bad.

And the witch is like okay then wow fuck you then, you took my cabbage for your baby and I can't have my cabbage because it's in your baby now so I'm taking your baby and I'm fucking naming that little bitch Cabbage.

[sandersstudies]

Me, Catholic, walking into a Protestant church with no depictions of Mary: where’s my mom

[fuitgummyworm]

Me, culturally Protestant, walking into a Catholic church filled balls to the walls with paintings sculptures candles and god knows what else: why’s there so much stuff

[fantasticmojo47]

Me, Orthodox, walking into a western church:  w h e r e   a r e   t h e   b o n e s

[odin-n-out]

Me, vampire, walking into any denominational holy place: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

[hungry-hyena]

Me, a janitor, sweeping up the vampires ashes: where the fUCk did all this dirt come from

[worldheritagepostorganization]

World Heritage Post

[gaynfl-moved]

being so staunchly anti generative ai while everyone around you is "i used chatgpt" and "i asked grok" and google search is useless and every company is implementing ai and every single celeb is taking ai money and partnering with ai is like... it's so jarring. why can't you see the harm like i can? why are you so lazy? why are we making society this stupid? can we please stop? it's killing people does that not matter to you?

[kingcatnine]

tumblr is a pretty tolerable place when you have thousands of people blocked and hundreds of content filters active at all times

[youre-only-gay-once]

"you can use ai to improve spelling and grammar"

[purgaytorysupremacy]

if you’re wondering why spellcheck and grammar check is worse now, it’s because they replaced it with AI! 🥰

now, instead of maintaining a comprehensive, nuanced, and human-maintained encyclopedia by which to check your document, they have switched to an AI that just compares what you’ve written to what other people write in, say, Google Docs, and use the most commonly used iteration.

ever have it change something like “all intents and purposes” to “all intensive purposes” or “should’ve” to “should of”? that’s why!

people make the same spelling and grammar mistakes so often, AI thinks that’s the way you say it because it is a PATTERN DETECTOR and cannot THINK let alone use language.

[youre-only-gay-once]

"you can use ai to improve spelling and grammar"

[soup-mother]

still thinking about "decolonising" missionary work.

the way you decolonise missionary work is by not doing missionary work

the way you decolonise missionaries is like this:

[soup-mother]

"but it's part of my religion to evangelise"

🐆🐆🐆🐆🐆🐆🐆🐆🐆 infinite jaguar attack

"but we need to go to Ethiopia (one of the oldest christian countries in the world) to make them the right kind of christian!"

🐆🐆🐆🐆🐆🐆

jaguars

"but..."

🐆🐆🐆🐆🐆🐆🐆🐆 jaguars

[soup-mother]

"but missionaries bring schools and hospitals to poor countries" that's called humanitarian aid and trying to use humanitarian aid to get religious converts is actually SUPER fucked! hope this helps 🐆🐆🐆

[valtsv]

i hate it when people ask me to "explain my thought process" like hell if i know

[valtsv]

"what's going on in that head of yours?" nothing i want to be a part of

[gostaks]

people have these “my dog is a democrat” stickers and I like to imagine them with increasingly unlikely animals professing more niche political opinions:

my parrot is a democratic socialist

my arctic fox is an anarchopastoralist

my catfish believes in the divine right of kings

[dragicdoncic]

i love objectifying & sexualising hard working athletic men. i wish shorter shorts upon them all amen