CUTE IN A STUPID-ASS WAY

[allmyandroids]

here he comes

[spockvarietyhour]

Hello.

[butchious]

i love the phrase "sex pervert" like. as opposed to what? abstinence pervert?

[poison-doll]

i think they're called catholics

[rare-basement]

[fuckersupreme-deactivated201707]

[oneheadtoanother]

[michaelmilkers]

tbh no april fools gag tumblr ever pulls will ever be as good as the lizard election of 2016 staff put more effort into that than the rest of this website combined and it shows

[michaelmilkers]

for those of you who werent here in 2016 on april fools that year the entire fucking website was transformed and there was an election for a position that wasnt even ever specified and the candidates were four lizards (or three lizards and a salamander as a scandal would later prove) and it was called decision2016

each lizard had their own 3d models and tumblr blog and campaign and there was also a tumblr blog dedicated to reporting on the election and they made like whole ass news broadcasts with a guy in front of a green screen

you could vote for your favorite candidate and there was a built-in function that let you make and post a campaign poster

in case anyone was wondering the winner of the election was mop. relatable and reliable. #Mop Could

[chantrymouse]

lest we forget

[sreegs]

This was absolutely the biggest April Fools effort I ever witnessed while on staff. I already posted about this in an ask but here’s more of the shit that went down behind the scenes.

- Like all April Fools, this was done entirely through volunteer work on Staff. No one was forced to work on April Fools, it’s always employee-initiated and driven, even if it needs approval from leadership.

- The prank almost didn’t go through because leadership felt that the lizards weren’t relatable enough, so the compromise was to give them hats.

- The video updates on the Decision 2016 blog were greenscreen Fiverr actors that were all recorded months? Weeks? in advance? I wasn’t on creative so I don’t know all the deets about how those were made.

- As mentioned in my post, the victory speech by Mop was one of our designers screaming as loud as she could in a closet near the end of the day. The full audio was never posted but staff kept passing around the scream on slack and laughing about it for months afterwards

- There was a “war room” dedicated to advancing the election narrative as votes came in, posting updates in real time and also pushing changes to code as necessary (for bug fixes and what not)

- The votes were real and the “election” was decided by real users, even if the graphics and whatnot were exaggerated for comical effect. Mop won because Mop won. Democracy at work

- Someone brought in their own lizard to celebrate the proceedings. It was a bearded dragon

- This was the culmination of what was probably the most cohesive and imaginative (and largest) creative team Tumblr ever had. Unfortunately almost all of them are now long gone, and Tumblr Creative is now just a skeleton crew compared to their peak

- Wretched Tooth Doesn’t Like To Talk About Himself

- People drew porn of the lizards and posted it on Tumblr. Staff saw it and were sending it to each other on the company Slack. We thought it was great. I mean, terrifying, but great

- This picture of David Karp is my favorite photo of David Karp I have on my phone

[parkchanwoohoo]

Realizing that I am not employing enough of my free will to become a nuisance at work

[encounteratnearpoint]

TOP 5 MOST PRESSING QUESTIONS ABOUT CAPTAIN PICARD:

Is he GAY? Is he ALIVE? Is he GAY? Is he DEAD? Is he GAY?

[afloweroutofstone]

[needs-somesugar-in-his-bowl]

reblog Mulder’s drawing of bigfoot titties or be cursed for 12 years and 12 nights

[skooth]

[segamascott]

[raptorcivilization]

There’s a BAFTA-winning, Oscar-nominated documentary that posted Kermit gulag

[raptorcivilization]

Mr Nobody Against Putin is a documentary about a Russian teacher that documents - and attempts to subvert - the state propaganda being used in Russian schools to justify the Ukraine war. The guy secretly recorded a lot of footage and had to be snuck out of Russia for his own safety, and so this could be known. It’s been receiving critical accolades and heaps of praise, including the aforementioned award wins/nominations.

My boyfriend just watched it in a theater and noticed something. At one point the movie references the guy who implemented the gulag system, following up on a comment from a history teacher, and this is the image they picked to represent it.

It’s fucking Kermit gulag. They grayscaled an image of the gulag scene from Muppets Most Wanted and used it to illustrate an actual Soviet gulag, alongside actual historical pictures and footage, in a deathly serious documentary. See for yourself, 32 minutes in. There is no reference or citation to the Muppets/Disney in the credits so this seems like a genuine fuckup in the editing room.

[sedlex]

Impeccable music choice here:

[emeraldhyacinth]

On the American broadcast, about five seconds after the music started the announcer said about the woman, “she lists her hobbies as ‘forgetting things’ and ‘existential crises’”, and I can’t imagine a more delightful one-two punch

[churchofthecomet]

greg egan novel bingo

[pitbush]

[whitepeopletwitter]

[samshine-and-lollipops-deactiva]

Wait, it got better.

[libertineangel]

He does this a lot, to my deep surprise in undergrad:

For reference, the reason nobody likes this book and you can press tofu with it is that it’s about 1600 pages long.

[horizon-penblade]

It’s also, by all accounts, the origin of Cousin Throckmorton

[supreme-leader-stoat]

[free-post-store]

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