Some people believe the show don't tell advice to be an inviolable rule and think nothing should ever be told and everything must be shown. This is incorrect. There are lots of times things can be told, and sometimes things have to be told.
Positioning matters. Telling is more effective when a reader has already bought in, when they care about the characters. Showing is better before that point - so at the beginning of stories or when new characters are introduced.
Storytelling is a partnership between writer and reader. The author's job is to give all the necessary details required for the reader to enjoy the story. But the author must not provide too many details. The reader's imagination will fill in the blanks that the author leaves. The author must therefore identify exactly what details are required in a scene.
For example, the main character enters a warehouse. He is ambushed. He hides behind some crates, then shoots the barrels the thugs are behind. The barrels explode.
When the hero enters the warehouse, the reader needs a quick description of the scene that must mention the crates and barrels. The reader doesn't need to know the crates are plywood, the floor is cement, or the barrels have been painted blue.
When it comes to show or tell an author needs to know exactly what they are revealing and why.
Showing: The bomb was a small device, half the size of a shoebox, with three blinking red lights on top. There were no exposed wires, just flat metal on all sides of the square, and the three raised LEDS. It sat in the centre of the otherwise empty table, the first light blinking on and off.
Telling: There was a bomb on the table.
When to show: the point of this scene is the bomb. The main character is going to struggle to disarm it. It is a highly tense scene where the bomb could do a lot of damage and the character might die. The bomb is plot relevant and/or disarming it allows for character development.
When to tell: the bomb is unimportant, perhaps not live, like they are in the workshop of a bomber and this is just evidence. The bomb is live but not important. Perhaps the characters are prisoners and disarming the bomb is just one more thing they have to do to escape. The bomb is live, but won't be disarmed. It's purpose is to create a hard deadline for the hero to do what they are doing and escape.
Show things that are relevant to the scene, tell things that create the things that are relevant to the scene. If the bomb must be disarmed, the bomb is the important concept in the scene. If the bomb must be escaped, the escape is the important concept in the scene.
Showing: we drove out of Athens in the early morning with the sun just a hand over the horizon. We could hear birdsong over the engine, through the open windows that carried a hint of apple and dung from the orchards on the breeze, but we cranked up the music to drown out nature. The road was smooth, with almost no traffic, and as I held the wheel I...
Telling: It took us almost an entire day to drive from Athens to Berlin.
When to show: when the journey matters. When something important happens during the journey. When the journey is a scene that develops character or plot.
When to tell: the travel is unimportant. All that matters is that the character who was in Athens is now in Berlin.
Show things that develop characters or plots, tell things that bridge scenes.
Showing: "Dr Tarrum believes the HN7-1A will alter human DNA, giving everyone superpowers. But our research shows he is wrong. If Dr Tarrum gets the HN7-1A into the water system, millions will die."
Telling: we exchanged pleasantries, a little small talk, then I made my excuses and was on my way.
When to show: show dialogue that matters, that reveals important information or develops character. Show dialogue that deepens relationships or is funny.
When to tell: tell dialogue that is unimportant.
It is preferable to show things that are exciting and tell things that are boring.
Showing: I clenched my fist at his words, feeling my nails press into my palms.
When to show: show emotions for main and secondary characters.
When to tell: tell emotions for extras.
With tertiary characters, you can show or tell. For more on character types, read this.
Tell when something must be interpreted unambiguously by the reader, show when something can be interpretated in multiple ways. In the above example, the clenched fists mean anger, but a reader might assume it means fear. If it doesn't matter which interpretation a reader makes, show. If the reader absolutely must know something, tell.
As with the travelling example, tell a series of actions in a single statement that would require thousands of words to show if the result of the actions is more important than the action itself: Mary bought the rope and hacksaw from the hardware store, the rubber gloves and bleach from the supermarket, and a large tarpaulin from the gardening centre.
We don't need to see Mary shopping for all this stuff, we just need to know she has it.
I'm going to write a scene about a sniper. Before I do that, I have to research snipers. Some things that affect long range shooting I discover are:
number of obstacles between yourself and the target
the temperaure of the surroudings (target may appear further up or down than it actually is if temperature is not considered)
gravity (the bullet will fall the further it travels)
your current position. High or low? Prone, crouched, or standing (not recommended)?
Elevation in mean sea level
the condition of your gun
The wind was coming from the north-east, so to my left as I lay on the flat roof of the building I'd chosen. The plaza was busy but the lunch time rush was moving off and spaces were opening in the crowd. I had my sights locked on the door I knew he would exit. It was a 25 degree angle down a 1 kilometre diagonal to where I knew his head height would be, and I'd factored in the temperature. A clear shot with no obstacles between me and him. The shot from this rifle would be at the higher threshold of sound, about 160 decibels. He'd be dead before he heard it, but others nearby would notice the sound, decreased only slightly by the humidity in the air. I already had my exit route planned. I needed to take the shot and go, I couldn't stay to watch him fall. My gun was in good condition, it would be a shame to abandon it here.
The main issue with this is I'm keen to show off all the cool sniping facts I researched. It's way too much information. It's much better to pick at most three things to mention. Also, it's disjointed. None of the facts tie into each other.
I was calm as I stared through the sight of the rifle at a doorway just over a kilometre distant. As calm as the gentle north easterly breeze that fluttered the flags on top of the embassy building. I'd checked them when I first arrived here, before taking my place on the hot roof. The sun was baking everything in town, and sweat beaded on my forehead and ran into my eyes as I waited. I swept it away with one hand, blinking, then refocused through the sight.
In this one, it mentions the wind, the distance, and the heat. Also, it's less disjointed, as the wind is compared to the sniper's emotions.
So show, but don't show too much.
Showing: But after all, the attic was not the most terrible part of the house. It was the dank, humid cellar which somehow exerted the strongest repulsion on us, even though it was wholly above ground on the street side, with only a thin door and window-pierced brick wall to separate it from the busy sidewalk. We scarcely knew whether to haunt it in spectral fascination, or to shun it for the sake of our souls and our sanity. For one thing, the bad odour of the house was strongest there; and for another thing, we did not like the white fungous growths which occasionally sprang up in rainy summer weather from the hard earth floor. Those fungi, grotesquely like the vegetation in the yard outside, were truly horrible in their outlines; detestable parodies of toadstools and Indian pipes, whose like we had never seen in any other situation. They rotted quickly, and at one stage became slightly phosphorescent; so that nocturnal passers-by sometimes spoke of witch-fires glowing behind the broken panes of the foetor-spreading windows. The Shunned House, Lovecraft.
Telling: the house was scary.
When to show: when you want to evoke an emotional response in a reader.
When to tell: when you don't.
Okay, you've told us Alan is lazy. But is he lazy? Is the character who thinks he is lazy wrong? How is he lazy? What does he do or not do? Show us that Alan is lazy.
Showing: There were piles of used dishes covering the counters, with moulds in various stages of growth in them. Dirty clothes covered the couch, clean clothes were piled on the floor, but in places the piles had collapsed and melded together. Flies hung in a thick cloud beneath the light.
Of course, if Alan is an extra or tertiary character you can just tell us he is lazy.
There are more occasions than just these. Basically, tell something you want the reader to know, show them something you want them to feel. You never need to show with extras. You should tell things that move the plot but have no impact on character development. Show the most relevant things in a scene. Don't overshow.
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