About Me :)
My name is Rachel, but I also go by the nickname Rocki. You can call me by either name, I don’t have a preference.
I was born a female and will always be a female. I believe God makes no mistakes and we shouldn’t change from one sex to another. However, I don’t believe that just because you’re born female or born male, that means you have to fit into that genders stereotypes. It’s just transitioning that I disagree with.
I am somehow 30 (I feel like I’m still 21 lol)
I am married. No kids, but we have two cats and that’s enough for me right now lol
I love video games, animals, theme parks (Universal is my all time favorite), water sports (such as swimming and water skiing), traveling (especially international travel), musicals, acting, and God.
I have a Bachelor’s degree in Theatre, but I really haven’t been doing too much with my degree. Part of it is because I graduated during Covid (I was supposed to graduate a year earlier, but that’s a long story), and the other part was because I got married not too long after. Life just took a different direction than I was expecting 😅
I was raised Catholic but became Protestant not too long ago. If you’re interested in that story, I have more on that typed down below 😊
My History With God
Like I mentioned above, I was raised Catholic. Both of my parents were raised Catholic, and it was really important to them that my brothers and I knew God. We always went to Mass every weekend and most of the schools I went to were Christian schools. I went to a Presbyterian school, Lutheran school, Methodist school, four different Catholic schools, and one non-religious private school. Yeah, our family moved around A LOT 😂
So, I always knew about God, and have always believed in his existence. But as I got older, I spent less time with Him. When I was in elementary school, I went to Mass, Sunday School, and Vacation Bible School during the summer. When I hit middle school, I went to Mass and occasionally Youth Group. In high school I only went to Mass because my parents made me. And from my second year of college, up until about two years ago I think, I stopped having any kind of relationship with God. I did pray occasionally, but that was more so me being selfish rather than trying to connect with God.
There were definitely times in college and after I graduated where I felt God trying to talk to me. But I was so deep in sin that I just ignored Him. It honestly wasn’t until I started dating my now husband that I started to have a true relationship with God again.
I met my husband in December 2019 and we started dating in February 2021. I hadn’t been to Church in a long time, and he said it was really important to him that we go to Church together. I wasn’t too crazy about the idea, but I cared about him, so I would go to Church with him. We actually went to two Churches for a while. One was a Friday night service for people in addiction recovery (my husband volunteered there), and one was a Bible Church on Sunday mornings. I never liked the Sunday Church, but LOVED the Friday Church!
God knew how to bring me back to Him. It wasn’t the Catholic Church, it wasn’t the Bible Church, it was a Friday night service for addicts. Which is so funny to me. I have never been an addict, yet this is where I felt God speak to me the most.
The first few times I went to the Friday service, I honestly felt uncomfortable. I had never been to a service like that before. It was incredibly different from a Catholic Mass, which is what I had been exposed to most of my life. Sure I had been to other non-Catholic services occasionally in the past, but this was also very different from those services too.
Eventually though, I came to love it. I loved how the Pastors sermons were relatable to anyone hearing them, that they weren’t aimed only towards addicts. I loved how he didn’t use big and intimidating words, but instead spoke simply and clearly. I loved how he talked about how God does love and care for us, but also how sin does hurt us and that God hates it. I feel many churches nowadays either only preach about God’s love, or only preach about sin and how much you’re screwing up. I really appreciated how this Church talked about both. The Pastor didn’t just give half of the truth.
God really connected with me there to the point that I got baptized at that Church! And the story of how that happened is actually pretty incredible. I was in a season of my life where I was going through a lot. My mom got diagnosed with breast cancer, my marriage was struggling, and I was crazy depressed. And while during all of that I did pray to God and I knew He was there with me, He also felt so far away. I hadn’t felt His presence in a while.
So one Friday night during all of this, I didn’t really feel like going to Church. But I felt God nudging me to go, so I did. My husband was home, but I decided to go by myself instead of bringing him along. On the drive there, I poured my heart out to God. I talked to Him about how I was struggling and how I sometimes didn’t feel His presence and that bothered me.
Because I wasn’t at this Church the previous week, I didn’t know that this week they were doing baptisms. I walked into the Church and the atmosphere felt different. Not bad different, just different. During worship, I was standing up for a little bit, but I just couldn’t get into it that night. So I decided to sit down and wait for the sermon to start.
As I was sitting, a girl I had never met before came up to me. She asked if she could sit next to me and I said sure. When she sat down, she said that the Holy Spirit led her to talk to me. Which is really funny, because during worship, I had noticed this girl up near the alter with her Bible opened. She asked if she could pray for me, and I said sure. While she was praying, she mentioned my mom, and how I haven’t been feeling God’s presence. I had never met this girl before, and I didn’t mention any of that to her before she started praying. The Holy Spirit was 100% working in her!
After that was the sermon and during the sermon, the Pastor asked some people from another Church to come up to the alter. I don’t remember if they were Bible college students or something like that, but the girl who prayed for me went up. Then the Pastor invited people to come up and get prayers from these students.
Some people came up, I decided not to since I had already gotten prayed for earlier. But then God revealed to the Pastor specific people He wanted to come up to the alter. The Pastor wouldn’t say the persons name, but he would describe something you’re struggling with. And when the Pastor mentioned an “insecure young woman”, I knew he was talking about me. It was vague, but you just knew if you were being called up.
When I went up, I went to a different girl this time just because she was the closest to me. She asked me what I needed prayer for, and then she also told me to say the names of people I haven’t forgiven out loud. I don’t remember when exactly, but there was a point while I was talking to her that I LITERALLY felt God in the palm of my right hand! I had been shaking beforehand, and my brain was like “It’s just your anxiety. That’s why you’re shaking.”. But right after thinking that, God revealed Himself to me again! It was incredible!
While I was talking to this girl, a bunch of people went outside to get baptized. She had asked me if I had gotten baptized and I said “Kind of”. I had gotten baptized as a baby, but that wasn’t my doing, that was my parents. This girl encouraged me to get baptized that night, and as I was following her outside, I saw my husband watching people get baptized! He told me later that he decided to go to Church too not long after I had already left the house. And that he had been sitting a few rows behind me during service.
After getting baptized, I just fell into my husband’s arms and cried. I had experienced Gods love like never before that night, and it was absolutely amazing! Since then, I have felt myself become more on fire for God. My husband and I started going to a Baptist Church and have become pretty involved there. I’m part of the Women’s Bible Study, my husband does Men’s Ministry and coaches soccer there, and we attend one of their Sunday services.
I am so incredibly grateful to God for showing me His love that night! I hate to admit it, but I was very lukewarm before then. Sure I enjoyed Friday night Church, but that was it. I was just enjoying and not doing anything for God in return. I’ve been working on living for God since then, and while I’m still pretty new to that, I’m definitely in a much better place than I was before 😊
Thank you for reading, and please remember, that Jesus Loves You! ❤️
