Yikes

Just a gay disaster

[girlrust]

happy pride to my favorite gif in the world

[importantcatpics]

[academicgangster]

[egberts]

the world's smallest carnivore is called the "least weasel" 😭😭 i'm dying but like if it's the smallest carnivore then it sure is the least amount of weasel you can have 😭😭😭

[sator-the-wanderer]

Look at him: this is absolutely the least amount of weasel you can have

[daughterofsarenrae]

To really put it in perspective

[flootzavut]

Immediately I love him

[incohorace]

(consumed with lust voice) omg what a fucking weirdo

[punkrock-bottom]

I’ve seen you people thirst after men I wouldn’t even feed to my creature

[salvadorbonaparte]

"on god's green earth" is way too fun to say even when you don't believe in god and know most of it is blue, actually

[ashlgcostumes]

Tag via @bluehairedspidey and vocabulary updated

[unconventiononthelawofthesea]

atheist quarterback throws a hail darwin

[akindlyowl]

agnostic quarterback throws a hail maybe

[waluigis-cock]

christian quarterback throws a my baby

[starlightxraven]

Nobody needs AI to search the Internet, court says in ruling against Google

Google AI Overview court loss in Germany could spell doom for AI search industry.

[appalachian-werewolf]

"Google AI Overview court loss in Germany could spell doom for AI search industry."

It fucking better.

[mrsjdavis]

Like to charge, reblog to cast?

[mementomauri]

I do have a fondness for how gothic and erotic lit had a certain barrier to entry. Like I do love more ppl getting into the vampire chronicles and I'll always be happy to have more Loustat fans but those books are weird and melancholic and erotic and philosophical and constantly testing boundaries and asking questions. And it feels like ppl are expecting or wanting "the vampire diaries but gay". The books have uncomfortable moments and the characters will do and say and believe things that make you double take but so much of the books are just "how moral can I be when nothing matters and I'm immortal?"

This isn't just a tale of gay vampires. It's a haunting philosophical treatise about life, mortality, morality, death, depression, incest, rape, love, regret, and the Pain Of Time. It can be fun and it can be gross and it can be wonderful but it's not for the timid.

[dreg-heap]

I never really considered that a rabbit would care for a scarab one way or the other. Didn't think a rabbit could formulate an opinion on the scarab at all

[dreg-heap]

She looks way more aware of the scarab than I thought she could be tbqh

[farewell-to-lorien]

Talking to Ghosts, by Sienna Gonzales.

[cryptidfuckery]

Hey so like omen wise how are we doing. Are we doing okay

[greatmountainfloofsquatch]

Could mean good things!

[lets-nuke-it-from-orbit]

Hey @evilwizard. So, you up to anything new lately?

[evilwizard]

haha it’s funny you ask

[sheikahfication]

I need a blowjob but I don’t have a penis or a strap on and I’m not taking off my pants so you’re just gonna have to figure it out

[spin-the-wheel-polls]

I will regret this and shouldn't make wheels at 2am but

This tumblr sexyman is your son!

Are you proud of him

yes!

somewhat

I shouldn't be but yes

No

NO.

I'm disowning him

I am scared of him

Results

Voting ended onJun 24

(sorry if your favourite is not in this poll, I went mostly off the contenders from this year's poll and the classics)

[papayajuan2019]

i'm close ☹️

[papayajuan2019]

[thesecretuncle]

Im being edged at Aldi

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

i think vampires should latch onto their victim's neck like a tick, and just stay there until they bloat & fall off naturally

[jaguarguard]

I- i hate that

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

furthermore i think the supernatural fandom should use this biological quirk to invent vampire sex knotting the way they did with werewolves and the omegaverse

[warpsbyherself]

Since knotting is usually pretty localized to the parts it wants to keep in contact (classic knot -> breeding), I think this implies that knotting vampire penis is now a feeding tool. Maybe it opens like a lamprey

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

no see you're focusing too much on penes as a concept. technically a vampire's reproductive organs are its fangs/whatever it uses to latch onto its victims. which yes could mimic many real-life bloodsuckers including a lamprey, a tick, or perchance...a mosquito? and of course fandom requires an implicit sexual nature to the act, be it one of breeding, feeding, frenzy, etcetera.

now hear me out:

PROBOSCIS DEEP THROATING

[wizardarchetypes]

it’s sooo funny when rude customers encounter employees who can deny them service for the first time.

i was working at a little cafe where I could deny service over bad behavior, harassment etc. & mask mandates had just ended a week before & already people were being weird about me still wearing mine—an N95, the kind shaped kinda like a duckbill.

so this man walked in, looked at me sooo scathingly, laughed at me, and said “damn. never known a woman to choose…practicality over looks.”

And I just said, “oh. you can go, you’re not getting a drink.” And he said, “what???”

I said, “sir, you just walked in at 6 am & called women impractical and me ugly in one sentence.”

And he was so astonished he didn’t even argue he just turned around and left 💀🙏🏻 it was like he suddenly became self aware

[carolinalaurel]

One summer I was running ferry rides across a lake so people could see the waterfalls without walking 6 miles when a guy snapped my bra strap as he was boarding the boat. So i immediately threw him off, he started yelling for my manager, my boss cheerfully informed him that, yeah, she’s the captain of the boat and she can kick off anyone she wants. He goes to storm off, looks expectantly at his girlfriend, and she just goes, “Well, I’M not walking six miles, Michael! I’ll meet you back at the car!” and sits right back down!!!!

The expression on his face when he was told that he couldn’t get on the boat, then immediately told that his girlfriend was ditching him? PRICELESS. he just blinked at her and then stormed off like a child. I gave her a free hat and was like maybe rethink this relationship…….

[hickeywiththegoodhair]

i once had this fucker come up to order a beer. while i pour it he shows me the wanky fucking chemical structure tattoo on his arm and he’s like “hey. you know what this is” i was like “nah sorry” (never cared abt chemistry in school, plus having to look at a some rando’s pretentious tattoo gives me the douche chills). he decides to respond with “heh. you must not read many books”

i immediately stop pouring his beer. i reply: “heh. you must not want this beer.” thirsty boy immediately starts groveling like a worm “please please no i do want the beer im sorry im sorry” believe me when i say it was one of the most pathetic things ive ever witnessed

[lezbadeez]

gotta love people immediately backpedaling when they realise that there are Consequences To Being Mean

[lastvalyrian]

I genuinely believe that part of why it has become so normalized to be openly callous and evil in politics is that customer service culture has trained affluent people that they can treat everyone they consider beneath them however they want and still be treated kindly.