Jump Start My Kaleidoscope Heart

Fourth Wing devotee, fanfic writer, queer middle-aged parent. They/them pronouns. Probably older than you but it’s cool.

[cuppydogshane]

hiiiii !!

been thinkin’ a lot about a trans!shane AU where he had a promising college career on the women’s team & would have been drafted to the PWHL but ultimately decided he couldn’t keep living & working (& dying inside) as a woman on a women’s team. it was too much. so ends the career of mckenzie hollander, #42.

initially shane was coaching a girl’s U16 team but too many parents gave him grief and treated him with suspicion and generally made such a fuss that he was forced out. he coached stealth under his mother’s maiden name for a boy’s U18 team and that was… better ? he didnt like lying—that’s what going stealth felt like. he wanted to be himself; his complete self, including the incredible hockey he played as a kid and including the man he is now.

and then, through a series of events the bears sign shane as the youngest EVER assistant coach in the history of the nhl. and the head coach is like “listen we wanted to draft him outright cause he’s a beast on the ice but we couldnt make that happen. it’d be a damn shame to let his talent and skill go. he’s already proven an amazing coach at the U-16 and U18 levels, he’s committed to growing with the team, we’re excited to have him.”

ilya was drafted by the bears seven years ago now. he’s a vet, he’s the captain, he hasn’t really had anyone to measure against. but he comes to the ice early at the top of the season to get some time alone and sees none other than The Shane Hollander messing around with trick shots. & so begins hollanov, over & over in every universe

- @persimmony-snicket :)

i would read a Thick Tome of this....... i would stay up past my bedtime for it too........ i loooove Shane's expertise being taken seriously and the coach being like we absolutely would have drafted him if it wss possible. ugh this rules. and of course ilya is fixated on him Immediately

[deja-b00]

the first couple of practices with boston, ilya keeps hearing his new teammates call out “big red.” he’s still learning english but he knows enough to figure out it’s a nickname. and by the end of the week, he is annoyed and is like, “this is dumb name. not funny at all. you call me ‘red’ because i’m russian? so lame.” and then his teammates have to be like, “no, no dude. ‘big red’ is our nickname for marly because his first name is cliff, which is short for clifford.” and ilya’s like ???

and that’s how the entire team ends up spending their friday night watching clifford the big red dog with 19-year-old ilya rozanov.

[sarcasticmothwrites]

Okay, so they start out with Clifford and decide it’s actually not very good (as an adult I find Clifford kind of horrifying, just the fundamental existence of this enormous dog) so they go hunting for other kids’ shows the team remembers, and that’s how they spend the rest of the evening watching Kim Possible and Rugrats and arguing over what shows were the best.

[synf3ll-moved]

take figures out of their boxes btw. sew patches on your favorite jacket. go to bed with your favorite plushes. wear the pants you usually save for special occasions. draw something cool on your wall. put a sticker on your laptop. dye your hair and pierce your lips. glass is meant to break, metal is meant to rust. items are meant to be used. that's how the world knows that somebody loved them.

[thestuffedalligator]

There’s a certain folkloric idea that if you die at sea, your soul is sort of. Inextricably stuck in the sea. Because your body is irretrievable, your soul is also irretrievable, down, down, down out of the reach of the gods who look at the surface of the world. In Norse mythology, they say that the souls of sailors who died at sea are caught in the sea-goddess Rán’s net and dragged into her domain, a distinct and separate afterlife alongside Hel and Valhalla. Davy Jones Locker. The funayūrei. A lot of cultures agree that once sea has a hold on you, even when your body has rotted and dwindled and been made food for crabs, it still won’t let you go.

Do you think we’re going to wind up saying the same thing about astronauts.

[tanoraqui]

#I feel like space won't be quite the same#the sea is easy to personify #it moves regularly like breathing #it has moods and temperaments #it pulls you down down and in sucks you away hungrily #the sea is a presence and it wants to keep you or why would it make it so hard to get back to shore #space is a lack #an emptiness #it does not move or breathe or swallow it does nothing at all #it is bigger than the sea bigger than the world #but it has no moods it does not drag you anywhere #it leaves you exactly where you are. forever. #souls in space are not pulled down and kept they are wandering lost #nothing holds them back but earth is a tiny speck and they will not find it again (@iztarshi)

[sarcasticmothwrites]

People who die in space become the next generation of hitchhiking ghosts

[cliff-marleaus-left-toe]

One of my favorite cliff headcanons is that he is supportive of Ilya and Shane, but he doesn't really get it not bc of the whole 'Shane is boring Ilya is not' propaganda everyone on the internet is saying he thinks Shane makes sense for Ilya he just doesn't understand how gay relationships work, like he understands conceptually that people are gay and Shane and ilya are in a gay relationship he understands they are in love, and they fuck, and he isn't homophobic, but he has never seen a gay couple and especially a gay couple where both parties are Masc and all his experiences with romance are based on relationships with traditional gender roles so he thinks that's how gay relationships work also so when the summer after their wedding he calls ilya up like 'bro I missed you we gotta catch up and shit' and ilya is like 'I can't leave my beautiful husband to come see your ugly mog you understand' but Shane feels bad that Ilya had to leave Marley when he moved bc he is a good friend he was at their wedding and shit and Shane lowkey wants to prove he deserves ilya to marly bc ilya doesn't have any family left that isn't his asshole brother so sveta and marly are the closest thing he has to family, and he wants them to like him and its stupid bc it's not like if Marley doesn't like him anything will change they are already married, but he just needs this one thing to work out so bad so he is like 'why don't you invite him to the cottage I am sure he'd love to spend time there and I want to get to know him better he is one of your best friends.'

So Ilya invites Marley to the cottage and Shane brings his A game he is usually a good husband naturally, but he is trying to impress Marley so he brings flowers to ilya when he gets back from grocery shopping or cooks his favorite meals or is just being generally physicality affectionate in front of cliff like kissing his forehead and holding his hand while watching a movie that type of stuff bc he knows ilya likes being shown off, and he tries to do all the little house errands that need to be done himself so ilya can spend his time with cliff catching up and eventually when Shane is out of the house for like a commercial cliff finally is like 'dude why is Hollander doing all that I thought he was the girl are you the girl?.' And ilya is like 'first we are both men so what the fuck second if you say that about my husband again I will hit you hard.' And cliff is like trying to explain himself by saying he thought all relationships had one person who was the one getting spoiled and one person who spoils them and the one getting spoiled is always the girl based on his relationship with woman and ilya is like wow he is in a prison of his own making, and he tells Shane and Shane feels so bad bc it kinda reminds him of how he thought about relationships before he realized he liked man, and he doesn't think cliff likes men, but he still wants to talk to him about it, and they end up sitting down and talking about how if he wants quote unquote princess treatment he can just ask for what he wants and needs relationships are about compromise and just bc they are men doesn't mean they don't deserve nice things also and of course cliff understands him to an extent, but he is a little stupid, so his takeaway isn't 'I should ask for what I want fuck gender roles' its 'dating a dude is like having a best friend who fucks you and still treats you like a princess, and he is like maybe I should date a dude.' But Shane isn't there for the second part of this revelation ilya is so he is like 'yes you should.' And then cliff wishes them a good rest of their vacation and leaves and then when they meet up during the season 4 months or so later cliff sees Shane on the ice, and he is like an exited puppy so he goes up to him and tells him he's got a boyfriend, and thanks him for the advice and tells him how awesome it's been and Shane is stunned for the rest of the game but after the game ilya is like supper smug bc he knew this was going to happen and is like 'cliff invited us to meet his boyfriend.' And Shane is like 'fuck it I guess this is my life now at least cliff likes me.'

[mizuthe-cat]

I don't think every character ever needs to be shipped with someone maybe they just need to be shipped in some sort of box alone to a location

[guiltfactory-moved]

this lamb keeps trying to sacrifice itself even though no one really needs or wants it to do that

[themoonandmyman]

@latenightsimping

[malekyla-001]

Poor Andrew, he'll have to hear about Trojans and Exy again.

[isolabellz]

first time shane meets svetlana ilya isn’t actually around. Shane comes to boston to spend a rare weekend with ilya but when he lets himself inside he’s met with svetlana who acting like they’ve known each other for years launches into a rant about how she just found out her boyfriend secretly got married behind her back for citizenship which isn’t what she’s mad about she’s more mad that he lied and she had to find out when she was going through papers on his desk and found the prenup but she broke up with him and took his giant golden doodle which she is stashing at ilya’s house for the time being and shane’s just standing there like he stands having no idea what to say to her which is not helped by the fact he’s trying to keep a respectful distance from the dog who keeps trying to stick his nose into his crotch and svetlana is acting like she doesn’t notice but then they bond because his boyfriend once threatened a citizenship marriage to someone else so he can kinda relate to the feeling so svetlana is like “fuck this i need a drink and you’re coming with” and drags Shane to a bar with her which of course gets photographed but before those pictures are posted ilya comes home to find an empty house and a giant dog sleeping on his couch and he’s so confused he takes a picture and texts shane is like “this is either the best of day of my life and you bought me a dog or the worst day of my life because you’ve been cursed by a witch and turned into a dog but don’t worry i will break curse and if i can’t i’ll still love you forever” and shane’s honestly a little too tipsy to deal with the way that text makes him feel like he wants to cry so he texts back “come pick us up” ilya responds “us???” and shane sends a video of svetlana holding the bartender hostage by drunkingly retelling her breakup story AGAIN but in russian this time so the poor guy has no idea what she’s saying. anyway ilya picks them up and brings them home and he can’t hide the stupid grin on his face and how light he feels that he didn’t even have to lock his too favorite people in a room together so he can introduce them like two feral cats and so when they get home he makes them all tea with slices of lemon and they sit on the couch, the dog despite being almost twice her size curled up in Svetlana’s lap and they gossip about svetlana’s ex and not once mention hockey and shane’s like “wow this must be how it feels to be a normal person in a normal relationship” anyway when the photos finally get released of shane and svetlana drunk at a bar and ilya coming to pick them up everyone online is confused as fuck as to what is going on because literally no context of the three of them being in the same room makes any sense and for the whole weekend people are asking for proof of life of shane because they all think ilya killed him for stealing his girlfriend or something stupid like that meanwhile shane hasn’t gone on his phone for 72 hours because once svetlana leaves shane and ilya spend the whole weekend fucking only coming up for air to eat and use the bathroom so when Shane gets papped at the airport there obviously aren’t any hickies because they aren’t fucking stupid but there is still the sense that he just got mauled by a bear (no pun intended) so at the next press conference Shane is forced to make a statement that no there was no threat to his safety while he was in boston and him and ilya just happen to have a mutual friend

[princessfag]

First of all I knew it was a trap second of all I’m having fun under this bucket eating snacks

[herowyn]

5 0    Y E A R S    A G O

[rarebird22]

Almost 57 years ago!

[palmettoshenanigans]

guys help where the FUCK do you order AFTG merch??? like merch from real people who aren't just drop shipping slop i mean fans making shit for the love of the game pun intended like god intended

i need merch guys and i dont know if etsy is trustworthy anymore

[sarcasticmothwrites]

Most of the merch I’ve found has been linked by artists on Tumblr but also @copperfirebird has an aftg design on teepublic and I can promise he’s a real person because I’m married to him

Palmetto Foxes by hellodragons

Celebrating their championship exy season

[zannolin]

damn i wish u guys could read this fic i haven't written and this fic i haven't finished writing and this fic i'm putting off outlining and this fic i outlined but haven't started and this fic i'll never write and this other fic i haven't written and this fic that exists only in vague impressions in my head that fall apart every time i try to commit them to the page and th

[aftgtinyfic]

hi friends <3 finally getting around to putting a masterlist together as we're starting to gather a large amount of prompts after so many weeks!! all prompts are tagged and you can see the original prompt posts from most recent to the very first one right here, but here's your full list i'll be updating as often as possible:

APRIL

sunrise | italicised oh | "wanna bet?" | fairytale | wrong number

MAY

“quick—hide!” | hunger | full circle | “do you see what you’ve become?”

JUNE

snow | key | amber | mixtape

JULY

frayed | honour | good boy

and if for some reason you've come across this post and don't know what tiny fic is about may i refer you to our introduction post? ;) a new prompt drops every thursday! have fun x

[fujokafka]

we need to bring back old school tumblr communication and im so serious. sending an ask to a mutual just to say hello. seeing three different asks in your inbox all asking how your dentist appointment went. seeing a post you think one of your mutuals would enjoy and tagging them/sending it to them in the dms. nowadays its just silently liking a post or (if youre feeling extreme) replying under posts. WHAT HAPPENED TO US!! we used to be a proper community!!!! #LetsBringWhimsyBack

[andthelaw]

reblog if you want ppl to send you random lil' asks

[sunsetssong]

my favorite type of Kandreil is them being in an established relationship except Kevin Does Not Know.

Kevin suddenly getting to see Andrew and Neil making out, being vulnerable with each other and consequently also him, and having no idea why he has been granted this privilege.

He just thinks it’s an mix of Andrew being used to keeping him close by as well as his new relationship with Neil. Once Andrew learns how to live without a threat on Kevin’s life, he will leave rooms with Neil in tow or send Kevin away, right?

Except that doesn’t happen. Andrew plays—actually plays in their games—and Neil does not only join him when he rewatches Exy matches, but for his weekly history documentaries as well. Kevin knows he couldn’t care less about historical accuracies, but Neil still entertains him with questions and listens to his rants.

And then it escalates further. Andrew starts using excuses of his old injury to massage Kevin’s hand. Neil presses his thigh and arm against Kevin’s when he leans against him to watch TV. Fingertips touching the small of his back, brushing against his tattoo in a sly remark, or digging in his waist when they’re disagreeing with him.

They kiss closer and closer to his position on the bench, beanbag, bed, until they are right next to him—basically pressing against him as he can listen to the wet noises of their kisses, and the slightest of moans out of Neil’s mouth.

One time, Neil is sitting on top of Andrew as they are making out. He must have been unsteady on top, because his hand grips Kevin’s shoulder. But even after he stabilizes himself, he keeps his hand there, rhythmically squeezing until it’s time for practice.

Another time, Andrew pulls Kevin with them by the hem of his shirt. Once the door to their dorm is closed, he presses him against the door with a hand on his chest, Neil pressed right next to him, and starts making out with Neil.

Kevin has no idea what he did to gain their trust for this, to be allowed to witness them in these moments, to be allowed to hear the sounds of their intimacy this close, but he would do it over and over again to keep being included

[penny-anna]

having a job is very weird bcos by and large your coworkers will be a variety of ages and you will not all be at the same stage of life. your coworker will be like, well I’m off home to spend time with my husband & child, what are you going to do with your evening? and you’re like, well, I plan on playing Rollercoaster Tycoon for as much as it as possible

[supervillainny]

And you are older than them

[sarcasticmothwrites]

It gets even weirder the longer you’re there. Like, my coworker had one child, a toddler, when I met her, and now she’s got one in middle school and one in high school. My boss went through a divorce and now has a serious boyfriend. My dotted-line boss has a kid who’s married. I was single when I started and now I’m married with a 12 year old and a foster kid. I’ve watched coworkers age and retire. It’s wild.