| somewhere in the middle |

:] she/her. xviii. things i like: liminality, non-places, urban sadness and identities, porco rosso, tumblr sadness, the god of small things, khaled hosseini, dark and light academia, my friends, pastel and peachy colors, ari and dante, hummus, books and movies that make me feel so much that i can't pick em up again, fleabag (one of them), art that makes me feel less guilty for being human, having an identity

[mournfulroses]

Gregory Orr, from Orpheus & Eurydice: A Lyric Sequence, originally published in 2001

[targetedknowledge]

[lycanthology]

i think one of the most important things you learn about making connections with others is that a significant portion of the time people just do not know theyre doing what theyre doing

[lycanthology]

sometimes someone is acting selfish because they just didnt think you had any interest in what theyre hogging. sometimes you dont get invited to the movies because your friend could have sworn that you said no. sometimes you think someone is mad at you because theyre bad at hiding how little sleep they got. we are all like little worlds that briefly crash into one another from time to time and we just arent physically capable of seeing the whole picture at once in those moments. and learning that really changed everything!

[foxofninetales]

In my head, I call this "vase of flowers" thinking.

See, when I started driving, I would get irritated by people who drove Soooo Slowly... like, the ones who slow down to 10 MPH to take a turn kind of slow. And then one day I was taking a vase of flowers to an event, and even though I'd strapped it in carefully you can bet I was taking the turns extra carefully to keep it from tipping over, slowing way down, and... oh.

And, like, there are definitely unpleasant people in the world. There are definitely people who are toxic, or just don't care about other people, or have a pattern of hurtful behavior. But there are a lot of people who are just trying to deliver a vase of flowers.

[theropoda]

maybe its just me. controversial opinion. but stress should not decimate the body as much as it does

[pansyfemme]

“never kill yourself” is such a funny phrase to me that i think it’s accidently started working. its like an affrimation. say ‘never kill yourself’ enough times as a joke and maybe you won’t try to kill yourself over minor inconviences anymore

[havingapoemwithyou]

Attending the Party by Hieu Minh Nguyen

[dsmsix]

[dsmsix]

[naamahdarling]

"In the same way that your heart feels and your mind thinks, you, mortal beings, are the instrument by which the universe cares. If you choose to care, then the universe cares. If you don't, then it doesn't." -- Brennan Lee Mulligan, D20, Fantasy High

[opiumvampire]

this one. fuck this poem.

[mompleaser]

i wanted to share this not to come off as corrective but because i actually think it really adds to the text to know that not only is it not from a poem, but that there’s a fuller version of this quote that is just as good. and it’s actually really good advice on how to a write emotion without becoming sentimental. james hall, the interviewer, is himself a poet worth looking into if you’re unfamiliar.

James Hall: I love that you risk sentimentality in the poems. Can you talk about how you construct a poem’s emotion without letting that emotion subsume the poem? What tools are available to a poet to mitigate emotion successfully?

Richard Siken: I didn’t see it as risking anything, and I suppose the tool for mitigating emotion is undercutting, but I’ll try to answer the question sideways: Even if you don’t believe in God, you have to believe in narrative. Things happen, one after another, world without end. Just because you’re self-aware doesn’t mean you can change what’s happening. Eventually someone is going to break your heart. Eventually something you love is going to be taken away. And then you will fall to the floor crying. And then, however much later, it is finally happening to you: you’re falling to the floor crying thinking “I am falling to the floor crying” but there’s an element of the ridiculous to it—you knew it would happen and, even worse, while you’re on the floor crying you look at the place where the wall meets the floor and you realize you didn’t paint it very well and when you’re having sex with your next lover on this very floor they will also notice that you didn’t paint it very well and they will think less of you for it. And then you think “Is that sentence too long?” And then you have to hold the  contradictions of sobbing uncontrollably and wondering about grammar in your head at the same time. I think if you are true to the entire experience, not just the sad part, you don’t risk sentimentality because you’re not overloading the experience with fake, melodramatic feeling. I also hear that whispering helps.

here’s to everyone who looked for this in crush and was confused because it isn’t there. the original interview is kind of hard to source nowadays because of how often it’s misattributed: https://web.archive.org/web/20060501211545/http://www.gulfcoastmag.org/GCIssues/gc18.1%20folder/18.1%20Samples/18.1IntSiken(Hall).html

[redstonedust]

i understand schooling in the usa sucks but i do think there reaches a point where blaming your ignorance on your education system starts ringing a little hollow. like girl you know you don't have to stop learning new things the moment you graduate highschool right. you can look things up before you say them. your browser has a search bar. the internet is at your fingertips. please........

[evilwizard]

okay im gonna hypnotize you with my ruby amulet now DONT BE WEIRD ABOUT IT. im doing this to make you betray the king. IT IS NOT A SEX THING

[violet-hady]

I think the fact that you immediately thought about clarifying it’s not a sex thing kinda makes it sound like it is a sex thing.

[evilwizard]

FOOL. i would be using my sex amulet for that

[quark-art]

had to draw this

[omishu]

I haven't read it yet, but I think this is what @pangur-and-grim's new book Apparently Sir Cameron Needs to Die is about

[thepromiscuousfinger]

[chaifootsteps]

#Please little bird

[meriwetherwrites]

I love that the modern-day tumblr post equivalent of chain emails only requires me to reblog a relatively pleasant image instead of forward an email to a bunch of my friends and family members to quell my raging anxiety.

[anotherknifeinmyhands]

[sirmanmister]

THE LICE ONE IS MAKING ME FUCKING CRY OH MY GOD

[cheese-grater-terminator-deacti]

[burntoutandproud]

BUT WAIT THERE’S MORE

[naamahdarling]

[moosethewriter]

I can't BREATHE

[subaru-copilot]

looks inside procrastination -> it's anxiety -> looks inside anxiety -> it's fear -> looks inside fear -> it's shame

[teaboot]

Surely these circumstances will improve with additional shame

[homunculus-argument]

Nothing slapped my shit back into place like someone pointing out that the "genius gifted child with so much potential who got burnout and mental illness" is just the nerd equivalent to the jock "could have been a pro at sportsball if it wasn't for the injury".

[lamignonette]

[allsadnshit]

Stop looking back at yourself with such disdain it's literally more cringe than whatever you were doing wrong back then

[engulfes]

Growing up is actually all about realizing people don’t inherently dislike you and it’s a bit odd to assume they do

[existentialdruid]

This

[jelliebeanbitch]

there are more tweets in this thread

fucking SLAY

[darlington-v]

this isnt even the full thread, there are even MORE tweets to this thread that i think are really necessary to read if you do what op is talking about! it is not enough to know that feeling this way hurts the people you love, we already know that.

this rest of the thread continues after the third tweet from the reblog.

like THE FULL THREAD is genuinely so reassuring.

sometimes, it is not enough to just know, sometimes you might need that reassurance of "do you really think of me when i'm away?" and someone reassuring you that yeah, they do. and evaluate that! trust that! just like op did.

and then learning that ykw, it's NOT any of my business really. and finding comfort in that trust that like. whether they are or aren't thinking of me, they really do love me.

this full thread changed my life and i am ALWAYS going to give the full thread because the parts people cut out aren't enough for the people experiencing these things, speaking as someone who does. it, really it just makes us, made me, feel bad about my own capabilities when i saw the unfinished thread.