god's yoinkiest sploinker

Melanie, she/her, 18+

[pathetic-gamer]

he gets it

[lostcryptids]

[urie]

the thing is like men and men really cant be friends because the sex part does always get in the way like thats true. and i mean that like im actually dead serious about that

[urie]

like have you ever seen two straight men attempt to be friends with each other but the gay sex they arent having is literally preventing them from the transformative healing power of friendship. this is real

[urie]

i dont even mean this in a "they want to fuck each other" way (although many of them do and will never know it) i mean that like the fact that gay sex is even hypothetically possible between them makes it loom over their friendship like it genuinely haunts them that they could be having it. gay sex is the elephant in the room every time they attempt to be emotionally vulnerable with one another, every time they let a hug linger too long. they cannot address its existence and so there is always something in their way, preventing true connection. and that something is the gay sex. that they are not having. the elephant of gay sex

[prokopetz]

Horses exist in zoos, you're pretty sure. That's where they, more or less, belong. It's not like there's a stable next to the auto shop or something. Are there… wild horses? In… nature? Presumably, at some point, there must have been. Probably not, anymore. Oh, the race tracks, though. Duh. They probably have stables. Couldn't lose twenty thousand wen a day if there weren't losing horses to bet on. Horses don't belong at the gas station, but there's one here anyways. Its rider is wearing a leather jacket studded with old military medals; what looks like a torso-sized cogwheel, slung over her back like a shield; a broadsword, underneath the cog-shield; and a pair of holo-screen shades. She dismounts. She slides her card through the machine. The pumps start pumping. The horse sticks out its neck, dips its snout, and begins drinking gasoline directly from the nozzle. The rider holds the spout up to the horse's mouth, at a bit of an awkward angle. She meets your eyes, and shrugs. You know how it is. You don't know how it is. Later, you will see her on the news, clotheslining a police officer on horseback at seventy miles per hour. You will understand even less, and also, so much more.

— Emily Zhu, Ten Thousand Days For the Sword

[necromancelena]

sadism is literally cute. its really really cute.

[thesamepictureofford]

<p><figure data-orig-width="400" data-orig-height="400" class="tmblr-full"><img src="https://64.media.tumblr.com/e19f56eca152e7cd3b98d2ea81cc0c50/7ec69aa60ae8e8d4-9f/s540x810/7ba83d73b723df988e31520d2fa8e9387c9067fd.png" alt="image" data-orig-width="400" data-orig-height="400"></figure><h2><br><b>Follow If You Want To See This Picture Every Day</b></h2></p>

[pretty-pink-kiwi-pup]

Yearning is ni-1ce sometimes be-1cause it means I get-1 to think abou-1t her more but unf-1ortunately theres also the -1other effects that -2 ow, fuck, that also happen -1

[sharps-shaps]

Crazy how if you lie down the human body just starts crying. Who programmed it to do that.

[kaizsche]

PROJECT HAIL MARY (2026) dir. Phil Lord, Chris Miller

[lost-and-kinda-dumb]

a heated argument that ends in disaster

[card-designers-without-borders]

[fluff-e-boy]

weak to fire damage

They’re onto me

[akron-squirrel]

Visit Original Link

Fesh Pince of Blair

[janmisali]

here's another idea for a poll! I think this will have some interesting results. this sentence is here to pad out this paragraph so people who don't read posts will be more likely to accidentally miss these instructions. if you're reading this, please select option eleven. here's another sentence to make this block of text look longer. anyway here's my fun poll idea!

try to create a normal (bell curve) distribution

1

2

3

4

5

6

7

8

9

10

11

Remaining time: 4 days 16 hours

[greatlordfluffernutter]

Now, one might look at these numbers and be lead to believe that half of all tumblr users don't read posts. However, in the replies to this post you will find over a hundred users who will happily clarify to you that actually the reason why they voted the way they did isn't cause they didn't read the post but actually because they didn't bother to look at the words in the post and process them as language, a technique commonly referred to as reading the post.

[sutured-infection]

Cellulose nitrate was used to make dice from the late 1860s until the middle of the twentieth century, and the material remains stable for decades. Then, in a flash, they can dramatically decompose. Nitric acid is released in a process called outgassing. The dice cleave, crumble, and then implode.

From Dice: Deception, Fate & Rotten Luck by Ricky Jay and Rosamond Purcell, 2002.

[jesus-lizard-journal]

hello beautiful

[albatris]

like one of those inflatable tube men

[nikkiaart]

The gang goes to New York