Kiana Khansmith
Not today Justin
art blog(derogatory)
tannertan36
pixel skylines
❣ Chile in a Photography ❣
hello vonnie
🩵 avery cochrane 🩵
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KIROKAZE
"I'm Dorothy Gale from Kansas"
gracie abrams
TMBGareOK. The Official They Might Be Giants tumblr
Sweet Seals For You, Always
Product Placement
titsay
Jar Jar Binks Fan Club
𓃗
Cookie Run:Kingdom Official!
almost home
seen from United States
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@sherlockismadeofskittles
-People might talk.
-People do little else.
I’ve had this in my head for some time, johnlock AU of Kaoru Mori's Emma with middle class!Sherlock and servant!John/ maid!Joan. This is the femlock version as I wanted to draw Joan in maid’s clothes :3
Clothing reference from the said manga.
Please reblog.
C'mon it’s not only pride month it’s indigenous peoples month!!! My people!!!! Could the president honestly fuck off?
IT’S NAME IS FLOP
that’s it, folks, we’ve reached peak cute
Sort of crack prompt: Stephen reluctantly attending a party in Avengers HQ, someone finds out what he did for Thor back in Ragnarok and he ends up demonstrating his mystical bartending skills, bonus points for transforming water into wine, lol
“Ah, Strange!”
Stephen jerked forward—barely managing notto spill half his glass of water on himself—as a heavy hand landed on his back.“Thor,” he said, recognizing the Asgardian accent before he even turned around.“It’s… been a while.”
The God of Thunder grinned looking morelike sunshine than the storms he ruled over. There was a lightning shaped scarover his right eye, the iris red instead of blue, and his blonde hair had beenclipped short by someone who didn’t seem to know how to use scissors all thatwell.
“Indeed it has,” Thor said, wrapping onearm around Stephen’s shoulders and steering them both towards the nexus of theparty currently going on in the lounge areas of the Avenger’s compound.
The first and seemingly last time they’dseen each other, Stephen had dumped two Asgardians in Norway to deal with athird. After an hour, the third had vanished, replaced by an even darkerpresence—all of which had been shot up into space by the Bifrost.
“I was wondering,” Thor started, his toneturning hesitant even though his voice was still cheerful, “if you could possiblyhelp me with something?”
“Of course,” Stephen nodded his head andplaced his glass on the nearest flat surface. “What can I help you with?”
Thor paused, frowning ever so slightly andlooking around at the other Avengers, security, politicians, and other variousimportant people Stephen had never bothered to learn about. “Where did she—there!”
It was easy following finding who the Godof Thunder was talking about, because the woman currently stood in a circlethat consisted of Peter Parker—still in his Spider-Man outfit—Shuri, and a treethat was called ‘Groot’. There were others; Tony Stark who looked as if someonehad tried to light a firework in front of him and tripped onto his feetinstead, a blonde that Stephen could vaguely remember was Sharon Carter (butthose introductions had come and gone so fast he was surprised he had managedto retain anyone’s name), and Rocket Very-Much-Not-A-Racoon.
The teenagers were chanting ‘chug, chug, chug’ as the woman in themiddle held what looked like a 1976 Musigny. A bottle that generally went foraround three thousand dollars.
And she was drinking it like a frat boy ata college party.
Stephen blinked, some part of himimpressed, and smirked as Tony looked both horrified and in awe when she placedthe bottle down with the others, wiped her mouth, and said something thatlooked like ‘next’.
“Are you afraid she’ll get alcoholpoisoning?” Stephen tilted his head to the side and looked over at Thor.
To his credit, Thor just looked amused. “I’mactually more afraid of her going through everything Stark owns,” he said.
Stephen crossed his arms over his chest andwatched as Tony reluctantly handed the woman another bottle of wine—one of thecheaper ones, ranging about one thousand. “What do you need me to do?”
“When I first met you,” Thor spokecarefully, “you offered me a drink.”
The enchanted glass mug. Stephen glancedback over at the woman who was finishing the bottle of wine and nodded. Betweenone moment of time and the other, Thor’s hand was empty. Until it wasn’t.
Thor stared at the rapidly filling glass inhis hand and grinned. “Thank you, Strange!” He clapped one massive hand againstStephen’s shoulder, almost knocking the slimmer man off his feet. “I’m certainboth Stark and Valkyrie will enjoy your generosity.”
“I’m sure,” Stephen managed, rolling hisshoulders and not thinking about the fact that he just enabled an alcoholic.
Shaking his head, Stephen turned towardsthe area of couches where Wong and Bruce Banner had taken over, talking quietlydespite the noise around them. The leather was stiff under his weight and Stephenleaned against the back rest.
“—I still feel bad about breaking throughthe roof of your house.”
“Don’t be,” Wong was smiling in that smallamused way he had, “Stephen’s used to it.”
Picking his head up, just so slightly,Stephen scowled at the reminder of how many things ripped through the townhouse—bothmystical and physical. “The Sanctum deserves better.”
“It doesn’t,” Wong said, tone hard andleaving no opening for an argument.
Stephen blinked a couple of times, hismouth opening and closing, not quite sure what to do. The Ancient One had beenin charge of putting him as the Master of New York. Even when he struggled shehad possessed the faith that he would be able to watch over it.
But he had also been a novice and just alittle bit of a fool. There were others who had been at Kamar-taj longer. Whodeserved it more.
“Thank you,” Stephen said.
“Don’t get cocky, Stephen.”
Bruce was still laughing when Valkyrie saton the arm of his chair, mug of mead filling already.
“You,” she said, pointing at Stephen. “Isthis yours?”
“Yes.”
Her eyes narrowed and she took a long,drawn out sip. “Can I keep it?”
Thatsounds dangerous.
Bruce was looking up at her with anadoration that only came from getting absolutely wasted and starting a barfight with a complete and utter stranger. Stephen didn’t really want to thinkabout the Hulk getting smashed instead of smashing, so he shrugged. “It’syours,” he said with a nod.
Valkyrie grinned, promptly swallowed downhalf the glass, and hopped off the seat to go talk to someone else.
“That’s handy,” Bruce said, looking down athis own empty glass of orange juice.
Stephen rolled his eyes and filled that,too.
Bruce grinned, taking a sip and sighinghappily. “I love magic,” he said.
//oh my god Bruce and orange juice
If you don’t manage to have children in your lifetime, you are ending a bloodline which lasted, unbroken, for 3.8 billion years..
Ok. I'm saving money.
I’m Afraid of Americans (1997)
Donald Duck Goes To Group Therapy For His Debilitating Executive Dysfunction And It’s Just Played Completely Straight For Like Four Pages Like What
no but it is potentially the start of the reverse happening, straights being put in the place of gay people, being kicked out of their homes and/or being killed because of their sexuality, if that starts it’ll set off a viscous loop that we may not be able to break out of
Boo straight people
Boo straight people
boo straight people
boo straight people
boo straight people
Reblog to oppress a hetero
1 rb = 1 het oppression
memeception
WE’VE HIT TERMINAL MEME
@caesarianconfection
I’ve said “I hate this” so many times on this website, and never actually meant it, because “I hate this” is just shorthand for ‘this is an example of a meme given a twist I wasn’t expecting with intent to surprise’. Which is, in of itself, a meme on this site. God damn it.
But this… This is something else.
The rapidity of a meme’s introduction to its zenith to its decline is so rapid that in ten years, you’ll need a damn twenty-page manual to explain this. It’ll be as unfunny and hard to explain as jokes in Shakespeare plays, except even more inexplicable because fuck, at least Shakespeare’s jokes are usually about anal or fucking your mother, good wholesome sex jokes we can all get behind.
For the love of fuck, how do you explain loss.jpg? How do you explain gun?
….I THOUGHT THIS WAS A YMCA REFERENCE
it is a YMCA reference - that’s one of the 6 memes being represented here
ok let me see if i can break this down easily. YMCA is the easiest place to start - the song itself has become a meme over time with people changing the lyrics to reference other pop cultural events. so YMCA is meme one (1)
this first lyric replacement (”take the breadsticks and run”) is a reference to the tumblr meme ‘stuffing breadsticks into my purse’. i think everyone remembers that one so i wont bother to explain it. that’s meme two (2)
“man door hand hook car door” is a meme of its own, a creepypasta from i dont remember when. it was a terrible stupid retelling of the generic ‘stuck in a car while hook handed man tries to kill us’ story so the stupid title caught on for memorability. that in and of itself is meme three (3)
‘gun’ is… yeah i dont know how to explain gun. long story short you add gun to the end of a phrase instead of what you expect the last word to be. its shock funny. its everywhere but its popular to add to “man door hand hook car door” for.. some reason? gun is meme four (4)
and the thing is, this four meme combo is something thats gone around before. meme combos are, itself, a meme. which means taking this meme combo and mixing in another meme actually becomes meme five (5)
which leaves us at loss.jpg. loss.jpg was a terrible bad comic supposed to be about some tragic event, but it was presented so poorly literally no one takes it seriously, and for some reason recreating the four-panel setup has become popular. so thats meme six (6)
(but i need to add that this is the greatest version of loss.jpg i think i’ve ever seen. the initial ‘young man’ lines up with the guy bursting through the door, and the shock meme ‘gun’ matches the shock scene of the woman in the hospital and idk if OP even thought about that but it makes this just so much better)
I wasn’t going to reblog this, but @pagesofkenna‘s comprehensive meme-by-meme annotation is a thing of beauty and should be shared.
average tumblr post contains one meme, this post, which contains six, is an outlier and should not be counted
it might also just be a coincidence due to loss.jpg’s format but the whole white minimalist four-panel setup is also suspiciously reminiscent of those early 2000’s rage comics
I was getting a political compass vibe too
tag urself im man door hand hook car gun
This works better than I thought it would.
This was in my senior project
pride cryptos!!
red banded dart frog by source
deadly stripe boy.
there’s something endlessly hilarious to me about the phrase “hotly debated” in an academic context. like i just picture a bunch of nerds at podiums & one’s like “of course there was a paleolithic bear cult in Northern Eurasia” and another one just looks him in the eye and says “i’l kill you in real life, kevin”
I heard a story once about two microbiologists at a conference who took it out into the parking lot to have a literal fistfight over taxonomy.
have i told this story yet? idk but it’s good. The Orangutan Story:
my american lit professor went to this poe conference. like to be clear this is a man who has a doctorate in being a book nerd. he reads moby dick to his four-year-old son. and poe is one of the cornerstones of american literature, right, so this should be right up his alley?
wrong. apparently poe scholars are like, advanced. there is a branch of edgar allen poe scholarship that specifically looks for coded messages based on the number of words per line and letters per word poe uses. my professor, who has a phd in american literature, realizes he is totally out of his depth. but he already committed his day to this so he thinks fuck it! and goes to a panel on racism in poe’s works, because that’s relevant to his interests.
background info: edgar allen poe was a broke white alcoholic from virginia who wrote horror in the first half of the 19th century. rule 1 of Horror Academia is that horror reflects the cultural anxieties of its time (see: my other professor’s sermon abt how zombie stories are popular when people are scared of immigrants, or that purge movie that was literally abt the election). since poe’s shit is a product of 1800s white southern culture, you can safely assume it’s at least a little about race. but the racial subtext is very open to interpretation, and scholars believe all kinds of different things about what poe says about race (if he says anything), and the poe stans get extremely tense about it.
so my professor sits down to watch this panel and within like five minutes a bunch of crusty academics get super heated about poe’s theoretical racism. because it’s academia, though, this is limited to poorly concealed passive aggression and forceful tones of inside voice. one professor is like “this isn’t even about race!” and another professor is like “this proves he’s a racist!” people are interrupting each other. tensions are rising. a panelist starts saying that poe is like writing a critique of how racist society was, and the racist stuff is there to prove that racism is stupid, and that on a metaphorical level the racist philosophy always loses—
then my professor, perhaps in a bid to prove that he too is a smart literature person, loudly calls: “BUT WHAT ABOUT THE ORANGUTAN?”
some more background: in poe’s well-known short story “the murder in the rue morgue,” two single ladies—a lovely old woman and her lovely daughter who takes care of her, aka super vulnerable and respectable people—are violently killed. the murderer turns out to be not a person, but an orangutan brought back by a sailor who went to like burma or something. and it’s pretty goddamn racially coded, like they reeeeally focus on all this stuff about coarse hairs and big hands and superhuman strength and chattering that sounds like people talking but isn’t actually. if that’s intentional, then he’s literally written an analogy about how black people are a threat to vulnerable white women, which is classic white supremacist shit. BUT if he really only meant for it to be an orangutan, then it’s a whole other metaphor about how colonialism pillages other countries and brings their wealth back to europe and that’s REALLY gonna bite them in the ass one day. klansman or komrade? it all hangs on this.
so the place goes dead fucking silent as every giant ass poe stan in the room is immediately thrust into a series of war flashbacks: the orangutan argument, violently carried out over seminar tables, in literary journals, at graduate student house parties, the spittle flying, the wine and coffee spilled, the friendships torn—the red faces and bulging veins—curses thrown and teaching posts abandoned—panels just like this one fallen into chaos—distant sirens, skies falling, the dog-eared norton critical editions slicing through the air like sabres—the textual support! o, the quotes! they gaze at this madman in numb disbelief, but he could not have known. nay, he was a literary theorist, a 17th-century man, only a visitor to their haunted land. he had never heard the whistle of the mortars overhead. he had never felt the cold earth under his cheek as he prayed for god’s deliverance. and yet he would have broken their fragile peace and brought them all back into the trenches.
much later, when my professor told this story to a poe nerd friend, the guy said the orangutan thing was a one of the biggest landmines in their field. he said it was a reliable discussion ruiner that had started so many shouting matches that some conferences had an actual ban on bringing it up.
so my professor sits there for a second, still totally clueless. then out of the dead silence, the panel moderator stands up in his tweed jacket and yells, with the raw panic of a once-broken man:
WE! DO NOT! TALK ABOUT! THE ORANGUTAN!
@posturingsimpleton
OMG
Ok that one wins
wanda maximoff: watched her parents die from a bomb created by stark industries
tony stark: watched his parents get brutally murdered by a man standing 10 feet away from him
wanda maximoff: is pardoned for wanting revenge against tony stark for what he did
tony stark: is a villain for wanting revenge against bucky for what he did
t’challa: watched his father die by a framed bucky barnes
tony stark: watched his mother die by bucky barnes
t’challa: gets to spend the entire film genuinely trying to kill bucky for revenge
tony stark: is a villain for BLATANTLY holding back in a fight due to his reaction to watching the most disturbing and fucked up thing in his life
bucky barnes: mentally manipulated into doing tasks against his will
tony stark: mentally manipulated into doing self-destructive tasks
bucky barnes: is [rightfully] pardoned for years of being a deadly assassin
tony stark: is a villain for creating something to protect earth that eventually backfired
natasha romanova and wanda maximoff: both willingly worked for the bad guys
tony stark: was unaware that his partner and friend had been selling his weapons to the bad guys
natasha romanova and wanda maximoff: get pardoned for the blood on their hands when they join shield/the avengers
tony stark: is a villain for the weapons that obadiah sold to the bad guys despite immediately getting upset about it and confronting him about it
steve rogers: throws an entire trailer at peter without knowing if he has super strength
tony stark: says that they need to hold wanda accountable for her mistakes
steve rogers: gets praised for saying she’s “just a kid” in defending her horrendous mistakes despite her age and the destruction she caused before
tony stark: is a villain for bringing peter to “web them up” and making peter leave the battle the moment he gets hurt
wanda maximoff: never has to own up to working for hydra, manipulating every member of the avengers, or triggering the hulk into destroying a civilian city under her control, joining alongside ultron until she does one good thing, essentially being the cause of all the death and destruction in aou, and eventually not being able to control her powers in lagos that she previously had total control over, which resulted in deaths upon deaths, and also gets to watch the hulk take all the burn and blame for the city she made him destroy
tony stark: literally is held accountable for every single action made by himself along with maximoff and every other avenger, tries his hardest to work alongside ross and 117 countries that all demand superhero registration through the accords as voted for in the UN, despite knowing how much a lot of his team would reject such idea
wanda maximoff: is just a 26 year old kid!
tony stark: is a villain for trying to find a middle ground between selfish team members who refused to be held accountable for being dangerous people and the 117 countries around the world that want them to be held accountable since they’re all powerful & dangerous people (a lot of which have bad histories, see: wanda) who shouldnt be allowed to just freely use their powers when they clearly pose to be a potential threat to the public
everyone else: gets to do shit
tony stark: is a villain for doing similar shit while also being the only one who fucking cares
It has been pointed out so many times but never stop reblogging
There is always one spot where your eyes naturally stare at and are comfortable being at without you controlling them. And it’s for some reason always at a girls ass.
Benedict Cumberbatch at Stephen Hawking’s memorial. 15 June 2018. He read Wisdom 7: 15-24. ‘For it is he who gave me unerring knowledge of what exists, to know the structure of the world and the activity of the elements…’ (v)
May God grant me to speak with judgment, and to have thoughts worthy of what I have received; for he is the guide even of wisdom and the corrector of the wise. For both we and our words are in his hand, as are all understanding and skill in crafts. For it is he who gave me unerring knowledge of what exists, to know the structure of the world and the activity of the elements; the beginning and end and middle of times, the alternations of the solstices and the changes of the seasons, the cycles of the year and the constellations of the stars, the natures of animals and the tempers of wild animals, the powers of spirits and the thoughts of human beings, the varieties of plants and the virtues of roots; I learned both what is secret and what is manifest, for wisdom, the fashioner of all things, taught me.
There is in her a spirit that is intelligent, holy, unique, manifold, subtle, mobile, clear, unpolluted, distinct, invulnerable, loving the good, keen, irresistible, beneficent, humane, steadfast, sure, free from anxiety, all-powerful, overseeing all, and penetrating through all spirits that are intelligent, pure, and altogether subtle. For wisdom is more mobile than any motion; because of her pureness she pervades and penetrates all things.
Such a perfect reading for Stephen Hawking, and they couldn’t have found someone better to read it. RIP, Dr. Hawking.
