drawing possibly one of the funniest moments in the book. chain… must chain……. quote below !!!!!

Discoholic 🪩
I'd rather be in outer space 🛸

izzy's playlists!

tannertan36

❣ Chile in a Photography ❣
todays bird
No title available

Product Placement

#extradirty
Claire Keane
No title available

ellievsbear
almost home
d e v o n

Love Begins

@theartofmadeline
Xuebing Du
let's talk about Bridgerton tea, my ask is open
occasionally subtle
Not today Justin
seen from Norway

seen from Malaysia
seen from Sri Lanka

seen from United States

seen from Malaysia
seen from Türkiye
seen from United States

seen from Czechia

seen from United States
seen from Russia

seen from Norway

seen from Finland

seen from United States

seen from Bangladesh

seen from Singapore
seen from Greece

seen from Malaysia
seen from United States

seen from United States
seen from United States
@shitphobe420blazeit
drawing possibly one of the funniest moments in the book. chain… must chain……. quote below !!!!!
drawing possibly one of the funniest moments in the book. chain… must chain……. quote below !!!!!
I miss when ads were a single click and then they’re gone. Now every ad has a minimum of three phases where you watch a video, exit the still frame of fake gameplay, and then exit the app download. That doesn’t even touch on the ones that forcibly take you to another app after opening a tab in safari without you ever touching the screen.
I hate advertising. I hate that you can’t do anything without companies jumping down your throat with mostly bullshit ads. I hate that billboards exist. I hate that every company unanimously decided to make their ads longer and longer. I hate that ad blockers try to charge you money and there are in app purchases to remove ads. I hate that my attention has become commodified. I hate that there’s nothing I can do about it.
brother no
just saw a pigeon doing the puffed up courtship dance thing to another pigeon, and as he was strutting around he suddenly stopped for a split second to do a very brief preen-peck at his own side, then returned to the strutting around. and i surprised myself by instantly losing respect for the male pigeon in that moment, like come on man i appreciate you had an itch or whatever but how is she supposed to feel special when you're getting distracted by bullshit like that? which on reflection i don't endorse, i mean those are pretty harsh dating norms i'm imposing on these pigeons, from a total outsider perspective, for no reason. probably not all girl pigeons are as uptight about that sort of thing as i would apparently be if i was a girl pigeon, maybe she even found it endearing who knows, i don't know her. it's none of my business really. sorry pigeons.
today I found out my mother doesn’t know what dandelions are and now I’m wondering what other strange secrets she’s been quietly harboring
Where do you live that you don’t have dandelions?
we have dandelions EVERYWHERE, they are basically our State Weed, it is absolutely impossible that my mom has never interacted with a dandelion before, this requires further investigation
So after extensive interrogation I have an update:
my mom is in fact aware that dandelions exist. she temporarily forgot the name and there was some miscommunication.
the truth is actually weirder
she’s aware dandelions look like this
she is familiar with this flower. she knows the name of this flower. she declines to believe, however, that these are also dandelions
she does not believe these are the same plant. I tried to explain, and she thought I was either misinformed or lying. so I asked her what exactly did she think the yellow ones were called?
she answered, with complete confidence: Daffodils.
gosh I enjoy this website
For comparison, this is a daffodil
See, folks in the southern US will tell you up and down those are buttercups, actually.
i don’t think so? i’m southern and buttercups are what we call these things (much tinier)
Wait I thought those bigger cup ones were Easter Lillies???
This is an Easter Lily. It is an actual lily and therefore deadly to cats.
They’re marigolds and I know a bitch when I see one!
This is a marigold:
….we need to start taking the phrase “go touch grass” more literally. go outside and examine a flower i beg u
But. But these are daffodils…….?
I AM GOING TO SHOVE DAISIES DOWN YOUR THROAT UNTIL THEY SPROUT OUT YOUR TOENAILS
Edgeworth and Phoenix having an argument about flowers, presumably in court, presumably in the middle of a murder trial.
I'm gonna say it, I do think that even the laziest person imaginable should have a roof over their head, food in their stomach, and access to healthcare
grace need sleep, statement.
grace..get in the hail mary
A waterless life's thesis.
"Claws like sharpened bananas shot toward me."
this sentence is
good
bad
ITS EVOCATIVE! LIKE GREAT BIG HUGE BANANAS EXCEPT SHARP!
YOU DO IT ON ONE OF THESE! OBVIOUSLY!!!
a lot of people are very angry with me over this, but I'd just like you to sit down and imagine a banana. maybe a green one so it's extra firm. if you need it to be harder, you can toss it in the freezer.
and that brown end? the hard bit? pencil sharpener. or sharpened with a blade. are you following me? now, attach six of those to a harpy.
yeah. I think you're seeing the vision. you can apologize to me any time you're ready
check in time:
I see the vision
it's still really bad
GOD DAMN IT!
Sorry to bother my followers with an in depth analysis about the diction of "sharpened bananas," but I have been watching this entire saga and have not gotten it out of my head so:
My gut response to the description is that it feels bad. However, something I am willing to admit is that it's very evocative of the shape of the claws. Bananas are known for being particularly curvy, and I think an emphasis on the curve of a bird's talon can be a good extra flair as opposed to a plain "claws shot toward me."
The problem is that any added sense of vivid danger from emphasizing the curve of the claws is lost in the comparison. Bananas are notoriously not sharp, and are in fact very easily squished (even by accident).
The sentence tries to amend that failing in the imagery by specifying the bananas are "sharpened," but that's a) a confusing image because no one does that and b) undermines the sense of danger even more than if it were just "claws like bananas," because most would imagine the process of "sharpening" a banana to turn it to mush (as nicely demonstrated by @transastronautistic in zir addition).
(photos from their attempt at sharpening a banana (and no, the attempt on the frozen banana wasn't much better, even if it wasn't mush))
If we wanted to make a comparison that emphasized the curvature of the talons without diminishing the sense of danger, perhaps we could go for something like a sickle. It's sharp, strong, and has an even more distinct curve than a banana.
HOWEVER.
"Like sharpened bananas" isn't inherently an unusable description. Depending on the context and what the author is trying to achieve, it could very much work.
I'm assuming this is for the sequel to Apparently, Sir Cameron Needs to Die, which is a very funny book that often derives its humor from overly drawn out or absurd descriptions.
(All the chapter titles are like this, and it's not just funny, it also pays off in a cool way later in the book)
The oxymoronic nature of "sharpened bananas" lends itself well to this tone, along with how it characterizes the POV that is producing this out of place imagery. I don't know the context of this scene, but if it's a largely comedic one with little sense of danger, being narrated by a character who is either so food or sex obsessed that their descriptions are hijacked by bananas even in danger, then this descriptor works! It's descriptive of the claws and especially the POV character, with the added benefit of being a very memorable and funny line.
However, if this is supposed to be a scene where you want the reader to be genuinely concerned for the well being of the POV character, then I don't think it works. The contradictory imagery immediately takes the reader out of the scene, because they have to stop their reading flow to understand what the claws are even supposed to look like, and keeping up momentum is really important to pacing action scenes.
Also, why are the bananas backward on the harpy photo.
interesting kink assortment on the dash
PHM fanart
they should rewrite the bible so that jesus would be a hot 5'2 girl with a creampie fetish from missouri
would you prefer if she had a different fetish tumblr user nutsacktorturer
so once me and my wife were watching a documentary where a snake ate like a million eggs. that snake just went to fucking town on eggs. and the snake made the eggs look so good that i kept thinking about it, and thinking about it, and thinking about it, and eventually it was 11pm and i ran out of willpower and decided to eat one (1) singular raw egg just to prove to myself that the snake was surely a liar.
the snake was not a liar. texture is like, super important to me and raw eggs are very Texture so i had another one, and then another one, and then another one, and eventually i ran out of eggs.
i had like, fifteen raw eggs.
i didnt really know how to explain this momentary madness to my wife, so my Plan was to put all the eggshells into a grocey bag, and then throw that grocery bag in the dumpster, and if she never noticed that would be Excellent and if she noticed immediately i could lie and say that the eggs went bad.
except i cant lie very good, and of course with murphys law being such, i got salmonella.
so i threw up a lot and my wife asked me what poisoned me so and i tried very hard to dodge the question but i was oozing shame like oil from a room temperature cheese and eventaully i gave in and told her everything and to her enormous credit she was more flabbergasted than actually upset. she did make me promise to not eat any more raw eggs, which i have stuck to, and she gives me weird looks during nature documentaries now as if desire was the only thing keeping me from eating thousands of pounds of krill anyway i made a joke earlier about being able to eat my age in eggs and my sister in law in law made a drawing to comemorate the moment and also because it was my birthday. she's excellent. thank you 10000000% @cintailed. you should all visit her page and admire her work.
I’m literally always saying this. U have to kill yourself to just look like some guy in a shirt
This is the 85 year old creator of Roger Rabbit: