Sir Buttles

that boy ain't right he/him

[columboscreens]

[shubbabang]

[noodleddragon]

[theafternoontiger]

Visit Original Link

[laralaralara]

i’m gonna make it through this year if it kills me

[fishgummy]

like what’s up manger

[ripempezardexerox]

[sorry-im-a-terminalidiot]

[albatross-the-pen-chewer]

[high-fructose-porn-syrup]

[somethingusefulfromflorida]

[lizardsfromspace]

The thing about Cottagecore is that is a fetishized aesthetic of country life, divorced from labor and idealized by a primarily urban audience with a backward looking ethos of tradition. They are not prepared for the stresses of a rural life: farming; harvesting; tapping pumpkins to ensure none of them have been replaced with flesh; losing out on income by having to use one of your pigs in a blood sacrifice to paint protective sigils over your doors and windows; checking cracks and chimneys for the flesh-vines of the Pumpkin Lord; having to decide, before the Growth is complete, whether that's really your tradwife or an amassment of vines, leaves, and blood in the shape of your tradwife; ignoring their desperate pleas that "I'm me! No! No!" as you burn them alive, realizing too late you picked wrong; and the exploitative corporate nature of commercial farming in 2024. All seen through a deeply colonial lens, of course

[lizardsfromspace]

When I made this post I did not expect it to be an effective test of which Tumblr users actually read a post fully before reblogging, and yet

[teathattast]

she ouro my boros til she ouro my boros til she ouro my boros til she ou

[xanaxfarts]

4000cc breast implants :)

[mackie-ds]

[brblifuk]

[cosmic-aria]

[daily-spooky]

[tuxedodan]

you know I couldn’t be a cowboy because I’d be stuck with my partner in the dead cold prairie night and our horses would be tied up and we’d be huddlin around a crudely made fire because it was too far to go back to the ranch and he’d play the sweetest song on his harmonica, the kind that you felt in your bones and your heart and that the hymns had nothin on, and then he’d finish and we’d both lean in a little too close and my hand would be on his bandanna and his whiskey-breath would be hot on my lips and I’d realize that maybe it wasn’t the touch of a woman i’d been hankerin for

[tuxedodan]

yeah I’ll be honest I don’t know wtf possessed me here

[mercury-moonlight]

[official-josh]

[pikachu-says-peekaboo]

[bewbin]

“if you’re looking at ur lap and laughing i know u’re on ur phone” first of all my lap contains dick and balls, historically the funniest things ever

[morganbritton132]

Me: You know how when you were a kid and you’d wish that you’d get sick or injured in a way that would justify why you didn’t live up to your potential?

Everybody, apparently: No?

[inflagrante-delicatessen]

marcille 🤝 that one dude from green eggs and ham

i will not eat it

[inflagrante-delicatessen]

I will not eat it in a dungeon,

nor will I have it for a luncheon.

I will not eat these wherever I am.

Laios, please, can we have normal ham?!

[stirdrawsandreblaws]

my hand slipped

[stirdrawsandreblaws]

@bumblepuppy i hope you don't mind me using your tags for this

[roseyskypeach]

When you yell at me, this is who you are yelling at

I may or not be printing this on a shirt btw 👀

[beesmygod]

laios was born to be the referee in air bud who makes the call that a dog can play basketball

[haaarpb]

[m0unta1ndude]

dr who’s on first, doctor strange is on second and doctor house is on third. theres no way theyre getting through a single inning

[four-rabbits-in-a-trenchcoat]

so who’s on first?

[you-say-that-so-often]

That’s right 👍🏻

[four-rabbits-in-a-trenchcoat]

that’s strange

[you-say-that-so-often]

No, he’s on second.

[four-rabbits-in-a-trenchcoat]

Well how’s he on second if he’s on first?

[you-say-that-so-often]

No no no, House is on third. Second base is Strange.

[supreme-leader-stoat]

Well this whole darn thing is strange but what I’m asking is who’s on first?

[cplus902]

Naturally.

[supreme-leader-stoat]

Who?

[tornadointhetundra]

Naturally.

[supreme-leader-stoat]

So Naturally is the first baseman?

[tornadointhetundra]

No. The first baseman is Who.

[supreme-leader-stoat]

Well I don’t know that so how’s about you tell me?

[tornadointhetundra]

House is on Third.

[supreme-leader-stoat]

I’m not asking you about third base I’m asking you about first base.

[tornadointhetundra]

Who’s on first!

[supreme-leader-stoat]

This is horrible

[tornadointhetundra]

Dr Horrible is the pitcher, not first base

[supreme-leader-stoat]

That’s not what I’m asking about! No!