got beat down by the world‼️

i love cats or something art @sunxrice :3 also main blog of @ricesinspo and @promptsforyourocs

[mbrainspaz]

idk what neurodivergent young adult needs to hear this but you are NOT supposed to give 100% at your job. I've gotten more promotions and raises since I started giving 40-60%, which my evil CEO uncle informed me is what bosses actually expect when they say 110%. My mental health has improved tremendously. I've spent 2 out of 5 workdays secretly writing my novel for the last 2 years and I've never been more respected and appreciated. Also--when you see glaring wasteful errors in the company's operating systems, say absolutely nothing! Embrace inefficiency. It is your friend in this capitalist hellscape.

[monidoll]

combining light and dark soy sauce to make morally ambiguous and nuanced soy sauce

[post-uwuifier-uifier]

uuuuuuuuu uuuuu uuu uuuu uuu uuuuu uu uuuu uuuuuuu uuuuuuuuu uuu uuuuuuu uuu uuuuu

This post has been U-ified.

[larval-tear]

Apple Bottomjeans is a beautiful gname for a gnome

[irischroma]

Boots Witherfur is a joyful gname for this gnome’s friend

[inthefallofasparrow]

Baggysweat Pants and Reebok Switherstraps are the two orcs that are hunting them

[post-uwuifier-uifier]

uuuuuuuuuu uuuuu uuu uuuuuu uuuuuuuuuuuuu uuu uuu uuu uuuu uuu uuuuuuu uuuu

This post has been U-ified.

[achillesinhighheels]

nobody in the entire world has ever known what to do with me

[post-uwuifier]

nopony in da entiwe wowwd has evew known wat to do wif me UwU

This post has been UwU-ified!

[post-uwuifier-uifier]

uuuuuu uu uu uuuuuu uuuuu uuu uuuu uuuuu uuu uu uu uuu uu

This post has been U-ified.

[moonlitmartyr]

I hate ruminating on what could have been. Out here thinking "if only I locked in when I was 13" are we serious

[post-uwuifier-uifier]

u uuuu uuuuuuuuuu uu uuuu uuuuu uuuu uuuu. uuu uuuu uuuuuuuu "uu u uuuuuu uu uuuu u uuu 13" uuu uu uuuuuuu

This post has been U-ified.

[sadgi]

can I get a job as an editor but the only thing I do is correct when someone uses the word "prone" when they mean "supine"

[sadgi]

thank you wikipedia for this really good image

[sadgi]

a helpful mnemonic for everyone

[that-stone-butch]

personalized ads are so funny to me

'hey we've been spying on you and tracking your every move. it's a culmination of state of the art technology and an unprecedented invasion of consumer privacy. a room full of men with made up jobs bent their will toward decades of constructing this system, defending it in court, and tirelessly innovating new ways to aggregate more data about you'

and the end result is

'yeah so uh we saw that you recently bought a car. so here's an ad for that car'

like no i'm good actually. you might be aware that i already have one

[elfwreck]

[girlgrimer]

How are my sweetie pees

[girlgrimer]

I Said How The Fuck Are My Fucking Sweetie Pees

[alphabetizing-posts]

Are Fuck Fucking How I My Pees Said Sweetie The

[post-uwuifier-uifier]

uuu uuuu uuuuuuu uuu u uu uuuu uuuu uuuuuuu uuu

This post has been U-ified.

[starryswirly]

how do I make money while being a good person

[post-uwuifier-uifier]

uuu uu u uuuu uuuuu uuuuu uuuuu u uuuu uuuuuu

This post has been U-ified.

[baradragon]

life could be so much easier if i could oscillate between a pussy and a dick at will but im sure many people feel this way

[post-uwuifier-uifier]

uuuu uuuuu uu uu uuuu uuuuuu uu u uuuuu uuuuuuuuu uuuuuuu u uuuuu uuu u uuuu uu uuuu uuu uu uuuu uuuu uuuuuu uuuu uuuu uuu

This post has been U-ified.

[crazysodomite]

Do you ever see people you know being friends/socializing with each other and think Damn. They're probably having so much fun and interesting conversations. Sadly I can't join them due to not being ensouled

[post-uwuifier-uifier]

uu uuu uuuu uuu uuuuuu uuu uuuu uuuuu uuuuuuu/uuuuuuuuuuu uuuu uuuu uuu uuuuu uuuu. uuuu'uu uuuuuuuu uuuuuu uu uuuu uuu uuu uuuuuuuuuuu uuuuuuuuuuuuu. uuuuu u uuu'u uuuu uuuu uuu uu uuu uuuuu uuuuuuuu

This post has been U-ified.

[athelind]

The Most Tumblr Punchline

I've noted before that my favorite punchline on Tumblr is "hang on, gotta look something up/okay that's funny."

Let me explain why:

It is a way to say "I don't get it" without blaming the joke or the teller.

It is a tacit admission of ignorance without shame or judgement.

It assumes responsibility for acquiring the knowledge the respondent doesn't already have.

It cues other people who Don't Get It to do the look-up themselves, allowing them to get that full impact of Getting It without derailing the post with explanations.

It gives subsequent readers, whether or not THEY got the joke, a little frisson of good feelings when they realize that someone else is now In On The Joke.

It not only makes the original joke funnier, it gets funnier the more often it's used.

[asterosian]

Blatantly stealing this image from that massive collection of screenshots, but this one in particular is pissing me off.

Do you people seriously think trans men don’t have severe social pressure to never ever consider that they might be men? Do you think transphobia as a whole only applies to trans women? What do you think happens when a trans man comes out, that the whole family gets together to throw a fucking party or some shit?

The beginning was just kind of silly and operates on the presumption that we can’t at least share a community in-joke about a shared or at the very least similar experience. But the part about “no extreme social pressures” is just an enraging load of horse shit. I get that trans women faced pressure to live as men and that’s awful. Now please realize that not everyone is pressured to live as men and some of us were actually heavily pressured to live as women and this is still awful.

[shitfuck101]

Roosters can come from eggs too!

[ralzei1997]

yuuup! and so can fish or lizards or bugs or any other kind of egg-laying critter!

[kurulover]

I hate that when you’re stressed enough your body just starts falling apart. I think it should realize you’re already stressed and don’t need that and start functioning better actually

[kurulover]

[yume-fanfare]

modern social media should stop offering "sync with your phone contacts to follow them" options and start offering "block all your phone contacts so they never see your account" options

[i-suggest-transing-your-gender]

Posts that hit harder as someone who is out online and closeted irl

[bridget-lover]

I bring a “there’s no meaningful difference between men and women that doesn’t exclude someone” to the function that gender essentialists hate

[i-like-reblog-maps]

What month were you born in?

January

February

March

April

May

June

July

August

September

October

November

December

Voting ended onMay 28

Doing a final project in my stats class, we have to pick a subject and collect data on it. We need at least 100 data points, and I figured this blog is big enough that a poll on here could get to that pretty easily!

Doing my project on if it’s more likely to be born in certain months :]

I have gotten the OK from my teacher to collect data using a Tumblr poll, btw. I’m also going to have to send her this post as proof of where I got the data from / proof I didn’t just make up the numbers. So. Behave

[edgar-allan-possum]

[agendermetalbender]