Mountains Beyond Mountains

Nature, travel, dogs, and assorted fandoms.

[my-2nd-account]

It's so important to me that everyone who meets Ilya feels safe around him. Shane at age 19 trusting him with his body and his sexuality and his reputation therefore his whole career. Svetlana who left home and could've gone anywhere but chose to move to Boston because guess who also lives there. Every person he's ever hooked up with because that's 100+ of people trusting him and saying yes. Yuna and David who spent less than an hour around him (Ilyushka not Rozanov) and accepted him as Shane's boyfriend even though they've spent the last decade hating him on Shane's behalf. Jackie trusting him with her kids after only meeting him once. Harris's family inviting him over so many times. His neighbors' kids making it a habit to wish him good luck before games. Troy coming out to him when it's his first time saying it out loud. Luca asking him for advice because he's finding it hard to "meet people". Coach Wiebe coming out to him and telling him about the guy he was in love with.

He's the safe space he needed growing up. He's the comfort person he wished for when he felt like he had no one. He's the familiar warm presence who has so much love to give to make up for all the love that was taken away from him.

[bleekay]

re: shane's dog post

shane genuinely likes anya very shortly after meeting her, he doesn't just begrudgingly put up with her presence for ilya's sake while hoping he'll get rid of her. he canonically thinks to himself he likes dogs more than he thought he did. so if it's less shane going out of his way to get a dog because he wants one, and more just. a situation that happened to him, then i think it's totally plausible for him to have his own dog

so he's 15 ok. a neighbor has pups and is looking for good homes, david figures it'll be good for the family, yuna agrees as long as they get proper puppy training, and shane just goes along with whatever. so they end up with puppy that's smart and very easy to train. very cute. when she gets a little older she's shane's consistent running buddy and she prefers a strict routine just like him, and for whatever reason she very much chooses shane over his parents, like in a blatant way. at that point i don't think shane would be like yeah no i don't want the dog, mom and dad you keep her. i think it'd be more like, okay i'm moving to montreal and i'll be traveling a lot for work, you guys keep her so she has company. and then several months later he'd be like well maybe she can stay with me when i'm here and you guys come out and pick her up before my trips and i pick her back up next time i'm in ottawa. and then a few months later hey maybe she can just stay here and i'll get a pet sitter she can stay with when i'm gone.

shane has the capacity to love a dog on his own, it just probably looks different from someone who is a "dog person," and i think that does actually align with canon

(not to mention, easiest excuse ever to leave early from or entirely get out of social gatherings he doesn't want to attend. i think shane would appreciate that so much)

(as she gets older and has some joint pain she can't be his running buddy anymore but there's a place he can take her where he can buy an hour of private pool time so they can swim)

(she gets along with everyone but more like in an aloof way where she will acknowledge their existence and then go about her day. shane is the exception, she will give him her full attention if he wants it)

(i saw multiple cute names for this hypothetical dog. personally i thought maple, because i imagined her as a red golden retriever and because it's so canadian it would make ilya laugh)

[gaynehollander]

Shane has always been a big napper. When he was young, school really tired him out. So many different people around him for such an extended period of time, expectations of certain behaviour, having to socialise, having to pay attention, having to answer questions, the constant hum of fluorescent lights overhead. He came home exhausted and in need of a nap more often than not. There were also the panics. Sometimes they were big, sometimes they were small, but they usually left him feeling wrung out and he didn't really function well until he'd had a nap after one. Becoming a professional hockey player hasn't changed this, if anything it's made it a useful skill. A little post-practice nap is sometimes just the thing he needs and a pre-game nap can make all the difference to his play. With the constant travelling and endless timezone changes, napping becomes a necessity.

Ilya, however, never quite got the hang of it. He knows a lot of his teammates nap whenever and wherever, falling asleep before games in hotel rooms or resting up on the road, snores filling the team bus or plane, but Ilya can't quite get there. It's probably a remnant from childhood, from not feeling safe enough to let his guard down like that. He can't even imagine what the reaction would have been if his father had come home to find him asleep on the couch. He was certainly quick enough to accuse him of laziness without Ilya handing over additional ammunition for free.

But Ilya loves holding Shane when he naps. He loves how quickly his body grows lax, loves the gradual shift in the depth of his breaths, loves the warmth of his body pressed against him, loves his sleepy little sounds and scrunched little face when he wakes up, loves that Shane trusts him enough to be that vulnerable around him. Shane doesn't really know that Ilya doesn't nap, not with how often Ilya's the one to suggest one, not with the way Ilya makes sure to feign coming out of sleep as soon as he feels Shane shift in his arms in that particular way that suggests he's waking up. He doesn't want to risk Shane feeling like Ilya's doing him a favour with holding him through his naps, doesn't know whether he can admit how much he loves their naps even though they never include Ilya falling asleep. He likes the way things are. He doesn't want to risk it changing.

Eventually it does change though. Not because Shane discovers Ilya's secret of never actually falling asleep but because, a few years into their marriage, Ilya start... actually falling asleep. He never plans to. He loves getting to spend that time resting with Shane while staying alert enough to catalogue his every sleep-muddled sigh, his every shift. He just feels so warm, so full of love, so incredibly safe that one day he just... drifts off. After that it keeps happening. He has Shane in his arms, he's enjoying his breathing, he's loving this moment, he doesn't want to lose consciousness, he wants to stay in it, but his eyelids are drooping. He lets them shut, just for a minute, but then he wakes up to Shane's smiling face, his eyes soft and sleep-warm, his hands gentle as they cradle Ilya's face and run through his curls, and he can't be mad at himself for having missed out on those precious moments if this is what he gets to wake up to. Time is no longer a limited resource. Safety is no longer conditional on remaining alert. He has the rest of his life to enjoy this, to let himself be lulled to sleep by Shane's breathing and waking up to his soft touches. He can let his eyes drift shut and trust that Shane will still be there when he wakes.

[sirens-scales]

We don’t talk about this enough. With all the big romantic gestures in The Long Game, this, to me, is one of the most romantic moments.

We know Ilya isn’t a fan of Shane’s restrictive diet. He teases him about it, but Ilya is an expert ragebaiter who knows how to tease the people he cares about when they feel safe and in ways that never really hurt.

Shane is “frantic” in this scene. Ilya has the perfect opening to say something about his diet, and he doesn’t take it. He sees that Shane is panicking, steps in and fixes it. He was looking at that menu thinking about Shane and Shane’s fuckass diet that Ilya doesn’t even like. But he knows this is important to Shane. He knows Shane is already nervous about being on a date with Ilya in public and being with another queer couple. So he meets Shane’s needs without Shane ever having to ask, and he does it quietly, without drawing any attention, so that Shane can save face.

Of course he’s gonna tease him about it a little bit later because that’s what they do. But he only does that AFTER Shane’s had a chance to catch his breath and feel safe again.

To be loved is to be known indeed.

[cablesscutie]

Shane and Ilya struggle to fit in in queer spaces - mostly because Shane in particular struggles. It’s a challenge for them and Ilya worries that Shane is still uncomfortable with being out, but he’s fine about them being together in public. They go grocery shopping, get dinner, walk Anya all over, and Shane is always holding his hand and happily letting Ilya steal kisses.

Then it’s like: is it internalized homophobia and he just doesn’t like being around other gays? Not really. He doesn’t feel judgmental necessarily about the other people? But he definitely doesn’t Get It. If anything he kind of wishes that he was able to understand what about all of it brings them joy because they look so happy but it all makes him anxious to his fucking core. It makes him feel like he did at high school parties, completely off-beat and unable to follow what the social cues are.

Then Harris throws a pride bbq at his and Troy’s place and Shane is squirmy again, zoning in and out of a conversation that “they’re” in but really it’s just Ilya talking and Shane humming occasionally. Until Ilya nudges him away from the conversation and says “The lesbians are playing corn hole over there, why don’t you go try that?”

Shane wanders over, and somehow very quickly finds himself paired up with a woman wearing a backwards Centaurs cap and a pair of khaki shorts Shane swears he also owns. He blurts that thought out and across the grass another woman in Chacos and a Hawaiian shirt (he later finds out this is her wife) cups her hands around her mouth and yells “GAYYY” in a booming voice nearly identical to how he’s heard it in locker rooms for years. Except for once the boisterous hollering isn’t shoving Shane further into an invisible box, it’s inviting him into the joke. “I think my husband owns that shirt!” He shouts back and he gets a very familiar clap on the shoulder. It’s extremely jock-y and warm and approving.

By the end of the night Shane has several new friends from his hours viciously chirping these women over lawn games. He’s sweaty and grass stained and has like five new contacts in his phone and plans to go running with Anya later that week. Ilya is a little sunburnt and loose, full of sangria and hot dogs (“please don’t throw up in our car” Shane does have to pull over) and new gossip that he recounts to Shane as well as he can remember it the whole car ride home.

[emotional-synth-music]

#but hollanov as a unit? belong with the lesbians#long distance long term situationships?#insane escalation of relationship?#never apart and obsessed with their dog?#these are all lesbians i know PREV YES

[ilyashaneconnorhudson]

x

[opalsong]

The Secret Society of Stick Handlers Series (Parts 1-6) [PODFIC]

Title: it started with a whisper Writer: @gurlsrool Reader: @opalsong, amanitaceae, @semperfiona, greedydancer, @mistbornhero, nonplussed, @elany, @melancholymorningstar, @sunlightsymphony, nony, Synteis, @wjgravity, the_abster, TheLittleMixter, vexbatch pods, @xianvar, @freekyflob, daisydiversions, Dairaliz, @deepestbluesky, ChaosKiro, Meliager, klb, sisi_rambles, @hullomoon, @blackestglass, celli, Judy Fandom: Heated Rivalry Relationships: Shane/Ilya, Troy/Harris, Bennett/Kyle, Scott/Kip, Luca/OMC, Price/Fabian Rating: Teen Length: 00:57:40 Size: 38.8MB Music: Everybody Talks by Neon Trees Cover: Opalsong Summary:

Scott: I’ve been getting asked if it’s me. I considered denying but if we all deny and one person doesn’t, that sort of gives their identity away and I’m not sure they want that. Ilya: Everyone thinks is me. My agent asked if I want to comment too Scott: Wait, it's not you? Ilya: Maybe 🤔 Or maybe not 🤪 Eric: What?

Or: When Adrian Dela Cruz reveals he dated an NHL player, chaos and damage control ensue. A story told through texts, tweets, and one pretentious Variety article. Links: AO3 Link Dreamwidth Link

This is part 1 of the the secret society of stick handlers series.

Title: (never) meet your heroes Writer: @gurlsrool Reader: @opalsong, amanitaceae, @semperfiona, greedydancer, @mistbornhero, nonplussed, @elany, @melancholymorningstar, @sunlightsymphony, nony, Synteis, @wjgravity, the_abster, TheLittleMixter, vexbatch pods, @xianvar, @freekyflob, daisydiversions, Dairaliz, @deepestbluesky, ChaosKiro, Meliager, klb, sisi_rambles, @hullomoon, @blackestglass, celli, Judy Fandom: Heated Rivalry Relationships: Shane/Ilya, Troy/Harris, Bennett/Kyle, Scott/Kip, Luca/OMC, Price/Fabian Rating: Teen Length: 01:02:52 Size: 43.4MB Music: I like me better by Lauv Cover: Opalsong Summary:

Troy: How many women have you slept with anyways? Ilya: ♾️ Luca: That’s just an infinity symbol Ilya: Yes

In which internet discourse ensues, the gay players of the NHL bicker in the group chat, and Shane would just like to get through the weekend without his husband starting another twitter scandal. Links: AO3 Link Dreamwidth Link

This is part 2 of the the secret society of stick handlers series.

Title: friends in high places Writer: @gurlsrool Reader: @opalsong, amanitaceae, @semperfiona, greedydancer, @mistbornhero, nonplussed, @elany, @melancholymorningstar, @sunlightsymphony, nony, Synteis, the_abster, TheLittleMixter, vexbatch pods, @xianvar, @deepestbluesky, ChaosKiro, Meliager, klb, sisi_rambles, @hullomoon, @blackestglass, celli, Judy Fandom: Heated Rivalry Relationships: Shane/Ilya, Troy/Harris, Bennett/Kyle, Scott/Kip, Luca/OMC, Price/Fabian Rating: Teen Length: 01:03:55 Size: 44.1MB Music: Healing by Fletcher Cover: Opalsong Summary:

Kyle: Your sense of age is so weird. So Scott’s elderly and Luca’s a baby? Ilya: Yes Shane: Luca’s older than we were when we got together though Harris: He IS? Kyle: literally wtf is this timeline

In which Harris adds Ilya and Shane to a gay WAGs group chat

(Can be read as a standalone) Links: AO3 Link Dreamwidth Link

This is part 3 of the the secret society of stick handlers series.

Title: wishing you the best (in the worst way) Writer: @gurlsrool Reader: @opalsong, amanitaceae, @semperfiona, greedydancer, @mistbornhero, nonplussed, @elany, @melancholymorningstar, @sunlightsymphony, nony, Synteis, @wjgravity, the_abster, TheLittleMixter, vexbatch pods, @xianvar, @freekyflob, daisydiversions, Dairaliz, @deepestbluesky, ChaosKiro, Meliager, klb, sisi_rambles, @hullomoon, @blackestglass, celli, Judy Fandom: Heated Rivalry Relationships: Shane/Ilya, Troy/Harris, Bennett/Kyle, Scott/Kip, Luca/OMC, Price/Fabian Rating: Teen Length: 01:53:05 Size: 77.9MB Cover: Opalsong Summary:

Shane: I’ve never wanted to share it since our timeline is so…complicated Hayden: Is it? You were fucking, then you dated, then you got married. Normal progression! Shane: I don’t think the “fucking” part of that equation is usually 7 years

In which the Voyageurs’ secret homophobic group chat leaks, Shane decides it might be time to tell the world how long he’s been seeing Ilya, and said world loses their shit. Links: AO3 Link Dreamwidth Link

This is part 4 of the the secret society of stick handlers series.

Title: and three's a crowd Writer: @gurlsrool Reader: @opalsong, amanitaceae, @semperfiona, greedydancer, @mistbornhero, nonplussed, @elany, @melancholymorningstar, @sunlightsymphony, nony, Synteis, @wjgravity, the_abster, TheLittleMixter, vexbatch pods, @xianvar, @freekyflob, daisydiversions, Dairaliz, @deepestbluesky, ChaosKiro, Meliager, klb, sisi_rambles, @hullomoon, @blackestglass, celli, Judy Fandom: Heated Rivalry Relationships: Shane/Ilya, Troy/Harris, Bennett/Kyle, Scott/Kip, Luca/OMC, Price/Fabian Rating: Mature Length: 01:36:22 Size: 66.5MB Music: Truth or Dare by Marianas Trench Cover: Opalsong Summary:

Luca: Everyone should be celebrating right now, not worrying about me. I’m so sorry Ilya: You're giving us more to celebrate! What is the point of us all coming out if you can’t bottom for two hot men? Luca: I’m not sure how to answer that

In which Luca's Stanley Cup celebrations go viral thanks to TMZ and some poorly framed photos. Luckily (and at times mortifyingly), he has all the queer NHL stars who came before him in his corner. Links: AO3 Link Dreamwidth Link

This is part 5 of the the secret society of stick handlers series.

Title: flashback when you met me Writer: @gurlsrool Reader: @opalsong, amanitaceae, @semperfiona, greedydancer, @mistbornhero, nonplussed, @elany, @melancholymorningstar, @sunlightsymphony, nony, Synteis, @wjgravity, the_abster, TheLittleMixter, vexbatch pods, @xianvar, @freekyflob, Dairaliz, @deepestbluesky, ChaosKiro, Meliager, klb, sisi_rambles, @hullomoon, @blackestglass, Judy Fandom: Heated Rivalry Relationships: Shane/Ilya, Troy/Harris, Bennett/Kyle, Scott/Kip, Luca/OMC, Price/Fabian Rating: Mature Length: 01:40:04 Size: 69MB Music: Dress by Taylor Swift Cover: Opalsong Summary:

Ilya: You respect my opinion as your captain, yes? Luca: Of course Ilya: My opinion is you should let this man rail you Shane: You can’t use your status as captain to make Luca have gay sex Ilya: Then what is the point of being captain?!

Or: In their many, many group chats, the Centaurs guide (and embarrass) Luca through the crush he's hellbent on denying.

(This is a prequel of when Luca and Archie first met/started dating. It can be read as a standalone) Links: AO3 Link Dreamwidth Link

This is part 6 of the the secret society of stick handlers series.

Thanks to Paraka for hosting!!

[clytemnestraaa]

i think ilya has slept with both alexis and david rose at independent times without realizing they are siblings and also both alexis and david are unaware of this

[glorious-spoon]

'people need to interrogate their kinks' okay sure fine. CNC is such a prevalent kink because we are all swimming in the soup of a culture with really fucked up attitudes about power, submission, and consent, and it makes sense that a lot of people process that through stylized play. loads of kinks work like that. the forbidden, the taboo, the social roles people are pressured to fill, all of these can be a breeding ground for kinks and fetishes and as long as everyone involved is consenting this is not actually a problem that needs to be solved. it's something to be aware of, and thoughtful about, when you're playing with other people, that's all.

(and yeah, the scene is not a predator-free utopia and in fact has a lot of the same problems as a lot of other relatively insular groups - namely, that it reflexively protects its own and this reflex strongly follows the various axes of privilege. this is a problem! it's not a problem unique to the kink scene though)

you know what i think maybe needs to be interrogated more than people's kinky fantasies, though? the shit that no one thinks is kinky. the stuff that's just, like, so normal that you don't even have to think about it. of course it works like that. that's not kinky, that's romantic and wholesome. we don't need to talk about consent - that's for weird stuff, and this is normal! and if you suggest that this is maybe something that we should talk about, you're the one making it weird, actually.

the abnormal, the stuff that falls outside of the script, that already is subject to scrutiny just by nature of being what it is. what maybe needs a little more scrutiny is all of the stuff that we culturally consider normal, healthy, and wholesome.

[purpleeart]

Shane and Ilya in their first year as official boyfriends

I always think about how free they felt about being affectionate with each others after finally confessing their feelings. I’m sad that the first part of their official relationship wasn’t covered by the books: we really missed them trying to be more open and sweet, being flustered by the use of pet names, being able to show how much they love each other with small gestures

@moetxt thank you for the idea :))

It’s just a fast sketch

[finny-red]

Home Sweet Home 🌃🌙

[sabotage-on-mercury]

the true duality of shane hollander: he is massively jock4jock brained but he couldn't give less than a flying fuck about any other sports than ice hockey even if he tried. yes he gets the appeal of juicy meaty athletes - in fact that's the only appeal working for him- but that's where his interest ends. ice hockey is the one and only sport that counts and shane has a massive god complex about it.

soccer/football is the thing you play as kids, for warm ups, funsies or light cardio, there is no way that the world is crazy about 22 men chasing a ball, nothing better than dogs really, if they could watch 12 men actually armoured up WORKING for the puck? he has personal beef with american football because how can it be that there is no ice hockey on superbowl sunday night? which is nothing against his loathing for field hockey, it's like you took real hockey and cut away all things that make it exciting, it's actually a hate crime. wrestling peaks his interest but you can't tell him that shit isn't more softporn than sports. boxing is useless he can watch people fight every other night so why bother. at one point he says that baseball is cute. he doesn't know a single rule about basketball and he prefers it that way. everything that these other athletes do, he can do with literal knives under his feet, a weapon in his hand, with like 20 lbs of gear on his body, on a slippery surface, at 20 mph.

but it's still nice to look at, shane grants them that. they might have bad taste in their choice of sports (or maybe wouldn't have cut it in hockey😌) but the least Shane can do is appreciate the effort these athletes put into building their bodies, he is generous like that.

the beauty and aesthetic of a rower's body makes him weep. he watches rugby players without a single thought in his head and a half chub in his pants. post tlg Rose takes Shane to a tennis match just for them to get sloshed and get insane about tennis player thighs in these tiny shorts. that's their boy aquarium. oh and Ilya is totally into how much (hate)watching other sports horns Shane up.

[bugslibraryy]

Ilya prescribing Shane kisses- he sees him stressed or grumpy or sad or over thinking or simple it’s been two hours since they’ve kissed and the Ilya is walking over grabbing Shane’s face in his hands and being like in a low quiet serious voice ok this is very bad you need at least- hmmm (he squints at him) like twenty kisses right now and kisses all over his face like mwah mwah mwah mwah until Shane gives in and smiles or kisses him proper

[bugslibraryy]

@isisisak beautiful tags “so many to go ugh I also hate this” perfect perfect perfect

[probablily]

@elliethefroggy ur tags are making me 🥺🥺

[shaneybby]

shane hollander, eight years old. paint me a picture.

... I don't know probably just having fun

[averyhollow]

Ilya: So, who is she?

Svetlana: Who is who?

Ilya: I know the girl you’ve been talking to for months has you wrapped around her fingers. You’re blushing!

Svetlana: What?! Never in my life have I -

Ilya: Nice try but that won’t work on me. So who? Is someone I know?

Svetlana: *sweating* Kinda.

Ilya: *grinning ear-to-ear* Don’t tell me she’s someone we had a threesome with.

Svetlana: No! Fuck Ilya, if it were serious don’t you think I’d have introduced you two by now?

Ilya: I do, which is why I’m surprised you’re still hiding her from me, because you are clearly serious.

Svetlana: Ilyusha…

Ilya: Sveta…

Svetlana: *side eye*

Ilya: So someone I kinda know?

Svetlana: I’m done answering questions.

Ilya: Well, it’s not Yuna, despite your best efforts.

Svetlana: Still can’t believe Shane blocked me because I asked a few innocent questions like “how strong is your parents’ marriage” and “are they strictly monogamous”?

Ilya: Wait, Vaughn’s sister is a lesbian. Please tell me you’re not dating the sister of the 10th best Admiral. Maybe mediocrity isn’t genetic but is that a chance you want to take? Plus, you’d probably have to go to his games and…

Svetlana: Ilya! It’s not her, though she’s perfectly nice and Vaughn is top 5 Admiral.

Ilya: Pity the Admirals. At least tell me if she’s connected to hockey.

Svetlana: *rolls eyes.* She has a brother who’s a manager and another who plays in the minor leagues.

Ilya: Funny. That sounds like…

Svetlana: See, that look right there? Exactly why I wanted to wait to tell you until I was sure it was serious.

Ilya: There’s no way.

Svetlana: Ilyusha, she’s a total sweetheart and I know you know she’s hot. And she’s funny and brilliant and talented and…

Ilya: Out to ruin my life!

Svetlana: Seriously?

Ilya: First my boyfriend and now my best friend! Why is Rose Landry doing this to me? How could you do this to me?!

Svetlana: She got Shane to unblock my number. That was sweet of her, huh? Reconnecting your boyfriend and best friend.

Ilya: Shane knows! What, are you 3 in a group chat behind my back? Really Sveta! You and my sworn enemy!

Svetlana: Why are you being like this? Shane’s friends with me and you’re actually attracted to women. So why can’t you make nice with Rose when Shane isn’t even attracted to women physically or romantically.

Ilya: It’s not the same! We never dated. I never paraded you around and got photographed and spread around online.

Svetlana: You said you might marry me for citizenship.

Ilya: How’d you know about that?

Svetlana: Shane talked about it in the group chat.

Ilya: So there is a group chat! My boyfriend, my best friend, and my sworn enemy. Anyone else I should know?

Svetlana: Nope. Just us. And Hayden.

Ilya: David and Yuna are the only people in this world I can trust.

Svetlana: It was Yuna’s suggestion to interview Rose’s brothers on our podcast.

Ilya: David Hollander is the only person in all this world I can trust.

Svetlana: It was David’s idea for me to gift Rose a custom puzzle made from a still of one of her movies. He even told me the company he goes through for some of the custom puzzles you guys have put together.

Ilya: I am all alone in this world. I have no hope but that my niece will not be so poisoned against me that by the time she is of an age to visit -

Svetlana: You know the clothes I sent her last week?

Ilya: Sveta, please don’t do this to me.

Svetlana: Rose is just so fashionable, and she threw in an autographed photo of the whole X-Squad cast because your niece is a fan.

Ilya: I have no one.

Svetlana: Absolutely no one. Anyway, I’m glad you know now. She is important to me, and now I can invite her to dinner this week. I’ll see you at Pike’s place.

Ilya: I’m abandoned to fend for myself in this cold hard world.

Svetlana: You certainly are. Don’t forget you’re bringing dessert.

[fanfavoritefragrances]

is this a thing? has anyone done this yet?

[your-cab-is-definitely-here]

I'm thinking about that first night at the cottage, after the fire and the loons and "she was so funny and beautiful" and how they'd finally put the fire out and go back inside, both of them a bit quiet and feeling bruised and clingy, Ilya following Shane around while he does his nightly tasks around the cottage. Gradually they'd shift out of that quiet space into another round of sex, a bit slower and quieter maybe than they've been all day, and after, when Shane ducks into the bathroom to clean up and brush his teeth, Ilya sees to the bed. They've already changed the sheets twice today but luckily they can get away with not changing them again now, Ilya thinks, so he just straightens everything out and sorts out untucked corners and the like, hands moving on autopilot while his mind grapples with everything that's happened today. He doesn't quite notice, therefore, that he's just doing everything he'd normally do after he and Shane have fucked and Shane has left to go back to his team or his apartment or whatever.

And then, suddenly, Shane's voice behind him: "Um, Ilya? What are you doing?" and Ilya realises he's swapping their pillows, like he always does when he's sleeping in a bed that Shane has vacated. Reaching for the pillow that Shane was using, however briefly, bringing it briefly up to his face for a quick sniff of the residual smell of Shane's hair, that distinctive coconutty citrussy shampoo, before dropping it onto his preferred side of the bed so he can tuck his face into it and hold on to the little leftover pieces of Shane for a bit longer.

He twists around to face Shane, bashful and a bit shamefaced, and finds a look of complete and utter understanding. Like maybe Shane, too, is used to scavenging, to rooting for the crumbs of Ilya he's allowed to hold on to.

But tonight they don't need to. For the next two glorious weeks, they don't need to. They can gorge themselves on each other, feast off each other's bodies like kings, find out just how far the limits of their hunger go.

The sting of relief, of gratitude, is almost too much to bear. Too much to bear alone, so Ilya opens his arms, reaches, asks, like he never would have dared to before, and Shane makes a strangled sound and barrels into him, bearing down with all his body weight to press Ilya into warm wrinkled sheets that still smell like them both.