Nov 9, 2025
seen from United States
seen from Brazil
seen from Switzerland
seen from Türkiye
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from Pakistan
seen from Russia
seen from France
seen from Italy
seen from United States
seen from Denmark
seen from Canada
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from Hong Kong SAR China
seen from Germany
seen from United States
seen from Slovakia
Man. my gender dysphoria has done a COMPLETE 180 degree turn in these past few years.
HATE transmedicalism for making me believe that I couldn’t just get top surgery without going all the way, like. Idk I wanted to stop Testosterone as soon as I woke up from my mastectomy and that’s when I knew i was just. A cisgender girl who had dysphoria abt her chest. I don’t think I ever had any issues with my body otherwise. But transmedicalism made me believe that made me ‘bad’, a ‘faker’, or worse, a ‘transtrender’).
BUT at the time I was kind of entrenched in transmedicalist-adjacent communities who shut that shit down when I brought it up.
Years later? In the end repressing it doesn’t work. So YES it is ok to do what you want.
Cisgender but dysphoric? Me too! That’s neat.
Transgender but non-dysphoric? Not a contradiction at all.
Non-dysphoric but you DO still want to medically transition? Perfectly fine!
Dysphoric but do NOT want to medically transition? Also perfectly fine!
Your life is entirely your own and you do NOT have to live according to what is expected of you. Don’t repress any aspects of yourself that are authentic, that will only lead to regret and frustration later on down the line, whether you are cis, trans, or some other thing else entirely. Fuck transmedicalism and those that enforce it.
a conversation between lunargaze and bisexual-slime
LG: I always warn people that casually wearing a binder led directly to a crazy increase in dysphoria & the feeling that I needed surgery immediately. A huge amount of the reason I ended up getting a mastectomy was to stop having to feel the panic-attack inducing compression of a binder. B-S: 6 years of consistent binding left me with increased muscle and joint pain and shortness of breath. I stopped for good November 2020 and I don't regret it. It also increased by chest dysphoria and now that I've stopped binding, I've found easier and healthier ways of coping. If you really must conceal your chest out of dysphoria, I'd suggest a comfortable sports bra (do NOT get one smaller than your size. get the correct size) and looser layers and fabrics. This has helped me massively, as has foregoing bras completely, sports bras included. I'd encourage you to at least give this method a shot because it's genuinely been so beneficial and helpful for me.
LG: Absolutely. If I had the thought to just like, stop wearing bras at that point in my life I can’t imagine how different things would be for me right now.
And let me tell you, nothing made my chest dysphoria worse than a mastectomy :/ it breaks my heart seeing more and more people like me expecting the affirming whole-feeling result and just ending up with more issues.
BS: I've always had chest dysphoria but it's only been in the past couple of years I've drifted away from the surgical route in favour of physical exercise to get the result I want. I recognised my goals were not realistic and my chest would always cause me problems post surgery, plus I was scared I would regret such a major operation so I just decided against it and decided I would prefer to implement a work out routine because I've seen that kind of thing done with smaller chests (I'm an A) so it seemed like an easier option. My heart always breaks for women who have been fed an idealistic image of themselves that can only be attained through surgery and end up with more mental and physical problems than they started out with.
thinking about detransition? you are not alone
Its okay if your identity feels confusing right now. You aren't broken; transitioning and detransitioning are very complex and personal paths!
a collection of resources and communities
OUR GOALS
- to provide support for our community
- to give new detransitioners hope for a future after transition that includes joy and satisfaction
- to promote solidarity between the trans and detrans communities in order to share resources and so that detransitioning is no longer treated as “betraying” our trans siblings
RESOURCES NEEDED / HOW TO HELP
we currently need information on the following
- which insurances cover detrans healthcare (ex. top surgery for detrans men) and where they are
- which name (and legal gender) change resources also serve detrans people
- discounts for laser hair removal
- detrans friendly support groups around transitioning to another gender
- hotlines/helplines
- posts/articles that give tips for passing as your gender
detransition after spending a signifcant portion of your life identifying as the opposite sex / in medical transition is such a confusing and isolating experience.
a lot of detransitioners only took hormones for a few years or less, their transition was often a relatively short period of their life as a whole. and don't get me wrong, that's a good thing! i don't want other women to have to go through these experiences, i'm glad if anyone can get out early.
but i do feel like it's a vastly different experience in some ways for those of us who are in transition for extended periods of time. i've spent literally half my life denying my birth sex, and trying to become a different person. all of my adult years have been spent in a medically and surgically altered body.
i WISH that my transition had been a shorter phase in my life, if only because it is so much harder to undo the effects of transition (not just the physical changes- if anything the mental effects are harder to reconcile). i don't know how to return to my previous self, i feel like i've cut myself off from who i used to be permanently. and i don't know if other detransitioners accounts of physical feminization after quitting T will apply to me or not, because i was on T for so long, and i don't have ovaries anymore.
the one thing that makes me feel better is connecting with other detransitioning women with similar timelines to mine- proof that yes, you can be okay after x amount of years on testosterone and after having a total hysterectomy. we can still exist in the world as women, even if it feels impossible to me at the moment
a small part of my motivation for transitioning was that i never liked my given name, i didnt like how it sounded and i never felt like it really fit me or had a strong meaning (i was named after a pretty actress who looks a bit like my mom)
and so, post-detransition, i switched my name to a feminine version of what i was going by, and i love it!
my family still calls me by my given name and im okay with that, since it doesn't feel like im taking psychic damage anymore now that i dont feel dysphoria.
just wanted to spread the word that you can change your name without having to be trans!
to detransitioners: yall are lovely and i hope youre doing well! your transition and detransition are none of anyones business! whether you changed your name, took hrt, got srs, etc, i hope your transitions are going smoothly and youre able to cope with your dysphoria how you best see fit! its a hard world to be a detransitioner in right now, too, so dont be afraid to ask for help and advocate for yourself!