⊹ ࣪ ˖☁️ megumi / aki x fem!reader poly headcannons ((this can be read as standalone but it’s based off of double take! if you want to see how this lil dynamic formed <3)), aged up characters. 1.8k words. fluff, smut, 'n two beautiful emotionally reserved men who aim to please (ᴗ͈ˬᴗ͈)ꕤ.ﾟ MDNI 𓆩♡𓆪
"The road to hell is paved with good intentions," it was something Gojo had told him as a kid. Something Megumi had always remembered for whatever reason, but never fully understood until he found himself wedged between your thighs while you clung onto Aki for support— eyes half-lidded and walls tightening around him as you moaned his name into his roommate's mouth...
It had started off as a one-time thing, an unexpected weekend affair that he assumed would end the minute you were able to return back to your apartment, but with all of the unexplainable maintenance issues your side of the hall seemed to face, you kept ending up back at their unit, over and over until eventually the three of you decided it would be easier for you to just... move in.
━𐙚 The apartment thrived on routine and balance between the two of them. Everything had its place and everything was accounted for. Chores were split evenly. Groceries were bought once a week and kept track of through a chart hanging on the fridge which they made sure to keep updated. It was a good system they had— a bit over the top at times, but something that you adjusted to rather quickly. You liked how much they both valued cleanliness, how comfortable and pristine things always were.
━𐙚 One thing that they hadn't developed a set schedule for though was... where you were going to sleep. It was a two-bedroom and neither of them were willing to completely give up their room. You usually gravitated towards whoever got home first, but god, there really was no wrong choice when it came to who you ended up falling asleep with. Megumi was a side sleeper, usually ending up as the big spoon with his arms wrapped protectively around your waist while he'd whisper dreamy little praises into the top of your shoulder. Aki rarely slept on his side— he preferred lying on his back with your head rested on his chest, his fingers threading through your hair as the sound of his heartbeat drummed softly beneath your ear. And as far as your preferenes went? Pft, you hardly had any as long as you were able to be cuddled up in their warmth, listening to the little groans that they both let out whenever they dozed off.
━𐙚 Eventually though, there were nights that you couldn't stand the idea of picking one over the other, especially as time went on and your feelings for them deepened. The first time you'd asked to sleep with both of them was awkward —which was comical really considering all the absolutely depraved things the three of you had already done together— but they gave in rather quickly when they realized how serious you were about it. Sleeping in the middle of Aki's king-sized bed with each of them at either side of you made you feel like you'd won the lottery twice. The smell of their colognes mixing together as their arms wrapped around you. Soft kisses being pressed into both sides of your neck. The unexplainable comfort that flooded over you when you were smooshed between them. You couldn’t help but think that if you had to describe what heaven might feel like, it would definitely be this.
━𐙚 Your relationship with them had unfolded so easily that after a few months, you didn’t really overthink it anymore. It felt normal when they leaned in and kissed each side of your cheek before you left for work or when they both held your waist to help guide you through a crowded street. It was second-nature to the three of you after awhile, but to the outside world— it was still something to gawk over. The amount of eyes that would follow you when you'd walk into a restaurant with both Aki and Megumi's hands resting on the small of your back was absurd. Some people seemed impressed, others disgusted, but there wasn't a single soul that would openly express their opinion about it when they were around. Well, except for...
━𐙚 Yuuji didn't say much— not to you, at least. He was sweet. Polite. Very curious but not one to overstep whereas Denji.... Oohhh, Denji had a lot of questions and zero shame when it came to asking. "So, wait—" He'd sputtered when he first walked into the apartment and saw the three of you sprawled out on the couch together. His eyes doubling in size at how close Megumi's hand was to your chest and how Aki's palm was lazily resting on top of your thigh. "You both... You're seriously both fucking her?! And like—what, at the same time? …Or do you take turns? Duuude, this is so unfair!! Why would you do this with him and not me??" Aki was up and on his feet in a matter of seconds, dragging the blonde out by the collar of his shirt as Denji continued to rattle out more shameless questions that Aki refused to answer.
━𐙚 There hadn’t been an official discussion between the three of you when things started to get more serious, but you could tell that Megumi and Aki had felt the shift just as much as you did. They’d always been protective over you in that quiet and calculated sort of way they both possessed, but after months of living together and letting themselves ease into the idea of actually dating you, they became a lot quicker to tell someone to fuck off if they felt like they were getting too close to you. It was almost cute, the way they instinctively acted as a team when it came to defending you and making sure other men knew you were spoken for. There might not have been a proper label for what you were doing yet but one thing was very clear: you were their girl and they weren't going to let anyone or anything interfere with that.
━𐙚 Megumi wouldn’t say that he was jealous— no, in fact, he was pretty sure he’d rather die than admit something so stupid. But some nights when the air in the apartment was thick with sex and the smell of your shampoo… Some nights when Aki was behind you with a fistful of your hair wrapped around his hand and his cock stretching you out so thoroughly it nearly brought you to tears, his mind would wander to places he wished it wouldn’t. He loved watching you, loved the feeling of your slick coating his fingers as he drew dizzy circles along your sensitive little clit. You were so pretty when you trembled like this— so fucking gorgeous when you’d lock your arms around his neck and kiss him like he was the only thing that mattered despite how relentlessly Aki was burying himself into you. Megumi knew that you wanted him. Knew that there was no competition when it came to him and Aki, it had been the entire point of this arrangement to begin with— for no choice to have to be made. For things to be equal. But still… he could feel himself slipping when he’d sooth you through it. He could feel how hard he was falling when your face would nestle into the crook of his neck and your voice would break into these soft little whimpers that were just loud enough for him to hear.
━𐙚 Aki was far from oblivious, especially in situations as emotionally and sexually charged as this. He’d seen that look in Megumi’s eye more than once— that overwhelming mix of want and apprehension that seemed to creep over him every time you came undone. Aki had no reservations about admitting his feelings for you. No hesitation in claiming you or even marking you when he got too carried away. He may have been quiet but he definitely wasn’t shy— which meant that between the three of you, he took the lead more often than not. “Megumi,” he panted, releasing your hair from his grip as he helped ease you into his arms. “She's practically throbbing for you, give her what she wants, yeah?" Megumi shot him a look but Aki only smirked as Megumi guided you down to the mattress. “Both of you need to let go.” Aki went on, kneeling down to place a light kiss on your forehead. “Gonna be a good girl and give him what he needs?” He whispered, cupping your face with one hand as you let out the cutest, most pathetic little “Mhmmm.” Aki smirked again, watching Megumi lift one of your legs up to his shoulder, his mouth dropping open at how perfectly your body took him. “Give him everything.” Aki reminded you, his palm roaming along your chest before he began to roll your nipple between his fingers, giving it a light pinch that made your walls flutter around Megumi.
━𐙚 There was no way to compare something like euphoria and heaven, they both knew exactly how to make you fall apart. Knew where all of your most vulnerable spots were. Knew what words would make your hips roll up to meet theirs. Knew what type of thrusts would cause your bottom lip to jut out in that pouty fucking way they both loved. They’d studied you extensively and neither one of them had ever failed at getting you off. But even with all of that, this still felt different somehow. Megumi was deep, buried to the hilt with one of your legs draped over his shoulder and his hand tightening around your side to hold you in place, letting you feel every single inch of him. You could barely think. Barely speak. Your body was grinding against him so obediently, it had him moaning into your mouth. His dark hair pressing against your forehead as your eyes met, both of you completely lost. You were dripping, squeezing him so decadently that he almost thought he'd forgotten his own name until he heard it spill breathlessly out of you.
━𐙚 Aki was like the devil on your shoulder, his presence grounding but methodical as he took your hand in his and slowly moved it past your chest and along your stomach, pressing your palm down onto your lower abdomen in a way that made your back arch and Megumi’s hips stutter. Your eyes locked in awe as Aki pushed harder, his breath fanning across the shell of your ear. "You feel that?" He cooed, voice sickeningly sweet. "You feel how fucking full you are right now? You like it, don't you? Yeah, you like the way his cock stretches that tight little cunt. Mhmm, suucha filthy girl." Your vision was white, your entire body shaking as your core began to unravel around Megumi. His tip kissing your cervix over and over, robbing you of all your senses. “Tell him,” Aki’s tone was sharp, commanding not asking. “Let us fucking hear it.” His hand dipped lower this time, fingers slipping between your folds, dragging all that slick they’d both coaxed out of you uppp and downnn until you felt something inside of you finally snap.
━𐙚 “I—” you whined, still writhing between the two of them. “I love you.” It came out so fast you didn’t even have a chance to stop it. Megumi’s eyes were wide, his thrusts suddenly beyond his control as he looked back at you, just barely able to hold himself together. “Megumi…” you pleaded, head falling to the side to catch a glimpse of the more sinister set of blue eyes also staring back at you. “Aki… I—” You weren’t sure where to look, they were both everywhere and truthfully… you hoped they always would be. “I love you.” You whimpered again, your walls spasming as you felt Megumi twitch inside you, the warmth of his cum mixing with yours before it began leaking down your thigh. “F—uck, I love both of you.” You mewled, one hand tangled into the collar of Megumi’s shirt and the other clinging onto Aki’s forearm. “So… much.” There was a small beat of silence, the three of you still trying to catch your breath and return back to reality after coming down from the high you’d just ridden. Megumi was the first to say it, his fingertips soft against your cheek as Aki carefully brought your wrist up to his lips. “We love you too…”
"seeing if he melts into the kiss" trend with Aki, not proofread
The sun dimly lit the kitchen, his hands rubbing the glass clean with the sponge, his sleeves rolled up. Aki's bangs falling to his vision as his mind wandered off to places with the background noise of the water going down the sink. For a second, he didn't hear your steps, maybe he just didn't believe you would wake up early.
He felt your presence heavy behind him. That's what you always did, you filled the empty room; or the room he saw empty, it didn't matter how many people were in there, when you came, it would suddenly start to feel more than that.
Aki put the glass aside, turning off the sink and then wiping his hands to the towel. His gaze fell on you after dropping the towel back onto the counter. He took in a deep breath he didn't know he needed, like how he forgot to breathe when he was focused to his works. Both of you stared at each other for a few seconds. He didn't raise a brow, he didn't ask, he just waited for you to do the first thing. Letting you act in your own pace.
When you raised your arms to your sides, opening them wide, his body took a step instinctively. Arms already ready to go around your waist and face bury to your shoulder like it's natural spot. But he froze when you grabbed his arms instead, guiding them up to his sides. His arms in the air. Aki furrowed his brows for a second, hesitating to ask what were you planning again.
You and Aki's mornings were silent. No unnecessary exchanged words, no loud moments. Just you two. Like it was supposed to be.
He froze when you stood up on your toes to press a warm kiss to his lips, your hands cupping his face. He didn't have a cold body, he was warmer compared to you, yet you still managed to burn him with your every single touch. His hands automatically found your waist, melting himself into the kiss. But you guided his arms back into the air jail. Aki realized your plan. He let out a shuddering breath, trying so hard to not let it come out like a groan. Despite still being early in the morning, he put up with your stuff no matter what.
His arms suddenly felt too heavy in the air when you kissed him again. He would fight devils, spend hours boxing and training. But not being able to touch you when you kissed him like that? That was over the limits, a training he could never get used to.
Which got proved when he didn't even last five more seconds, one arm wrapping around your waist and pushing you against the counter, caging your body. His other hand going to the side if your neck as he aligned your face to himself, kissing you in a way that was too much for the first thing in the morning. Melting into you.
You let out a small giggle when he didn't even last, he was trying to act annoyed, yet Aki's lips curled into a subtle smile when he heard your voice.
"you were supposed to keep your hands off." You chuckled, arms wrapping around his neck. His voice hoarse: "I can't do that." Aki muttered against your cheek.
When Aki kisses you, he throws his whole back into it, kissing you like it’s the last time he’ll ever see you.
Aki isn’t overly affectionate anyways, he leaves most of that to you, letting you grab him and hold his hand and initiate any kiss. He likes affection, that he’d never tell you, but he’d die if he didn’t get any from you, yet Aki is seldom the one to initiate it. It’s not a matter of being too shy, it’s moreso that you take the task with ease, eagerness even, subjecting him to gentle touches and loving presses of your lips.
But occasionally, Aki needs to be grounded, needs to remind himself that you’re here, you’re his, and you’re not going anywhere.
Nothing can take you from him. He won’t let them.
Shambling into the kitchen after such a day, you look over your shoulder to watch him loosen his tie and toe off his shoes, and you smile before turning to face him fully.
“Hey,” you hum happily, wiping your hands on your apron, “how was-“
Before you can finish, Aki comes up and wraps one of his long arms around your neck and pulls you in close, head ducking down to capture your surprised lips in a kiss. A massive hand cups the back of your head, and before your eyes flutter close in shock, you’re able to catch a glimpse of his face, brows furrowed in focus and body tense. You let your eyes close and your body melt into his embrace, arms wrapping lowly around him as your tongues move in tandem, rhythmic with love and assurance and grounding that you're both going to be okay.
Slowly, and with his hesitance, you pull back, hands coming up to cradle his tired face in your hands. He makes a grunt of protest and ducks down to kiss you again, only for you to shush him softly and rest your head against his, eye contact firm and slowing his quick breath down to normal.
"Hi," you whisper.
"Hey," he says back. There's the subtlest twitch of a smile on his cheeks, but you say nothing.
Instead, you turn slightly to turn off the stove and let him embrace you fully, sniffling your scalp and juncture of your neck, arms squeezing you so tight it nearly hurts, but you don't dare say anything to stop him.
He needs this.
Aki kisses you like every time could be the last, because, while he’d never tell you this, Aki constantly fears that one day, it just might be.
And he’s never about to take that risk without showing you how much he loves you whenever he can.
Summary: A tale of a strong knight falling in love with what he must protect.
A/N: This has been on my mind for a year! I honestly think this is my favorite fic I have done. I've had such a hard time writing lately, but this came so easy. The world became much bigger than I imagined. I wouldn't mind doing spinoffs maybe.
It’s warmer here than Aki remembers it being. Right under the sun, it’s no surprise the castle was built on a hill. The most important building in the whole kingdom. He hasn’t been here in ages, longer than ages. Aki has been away for a very long time, but he’s now returned on special order from the King. He wouldn’t say it was unwarranted exactly. He was the best knight in the nation; it only made sense that the King would assign any special orders to him. When the message came to him Aki found himself intrigued by the offer.
He’s spent the past several years on the ground commanding the kingdom's army into battle. Most certainly not an easy task, which was why he was interested at the King's request for a personal knight. For the Princess, the message noted. He didn't really know much about you. You were an only child, the sole heir to the strong King and Queen. He hadn’t spent any time near normal subjects, so he was unable to speak towards your character (though he had heard whispers between knights speaking of your beauty, whether or not they were true was to remain to be seen). That being said, you were a Princess. He was sure that nepotism carried you along in life, and he had a hard time fathoming you to be anything of a normal person. Not on purpose of course. You just had everything handed to you on a silver platter.
When Aki sets foot on the castle grounds he realizes not much has changed. The walls are still cemented with thick concrete, daring anyone to try to knock them down. There’s still the same silver birch trees planted on the sides, giving the castle a more warm feel. He’s even seen a few familiar faces since arriving, to which he gave a curt nod before passing by. Aki hated to admit it, but he knew he was more or less famous now. He knew tales of his deeds reached far and wide within the kingdom once he became the leader of the army years ago. That was one of the reasons he was hardly surprised to learn that the King requested his help specifically.
Aki locates the head guard, following him around the halls of the castle to find the King. He’s making small talk, half paying attention while half wondering what his days are going to be like. The sounds of their feet fill the halls, each step determined and measured.
He probably wouldn’t need to touch his sword again.
On the off chance he would need it, he would be more than ready.
“Your Majesty,” the guard abruptly says, coming to a halt and then bowing.
Aki tunes back in to notice the King standing in front of him, his attendants on either side of him. He looks exactly as Aki remembers. Tall and muscular, with deep smile lines. It’s been years but he still commands the same presence he did back then.
“Sir Hayakawa, it’s wonderful to see you again.” The King begins, voice deep and all powering. “How was the journey?” If he’s feigning interest, Aki certainly can’t tell, but then again he’s never been one to fully understand royals.
“It was pleasant, Your Highness.” Aki bows, keeping his eyes trained at the King’s feet before he stands back up straight.
“That’s wonderful to hear. We were starting to get worried about you, you know.” The King starts walking, looking over his shoulder to wait for Aki and the guard to follow. “We haven’t heard much about your ventures as of late.”
Communication has been slow between the army and the crown for the past several months. There had been no major battles to report, which was a good thing. Sometimes Aki wondered if the royals wished there to be more blood shed - if it would be more entertaining for them.
“Nothing to report Your Highness, everything has been calm on the ground, more or less.” Aki trails after the King, walking throughout the halls. The King is bringing him back outside, he’s noticed.
Isn’t he supposed to meet the Princess first thing?
“Well, I suppose that’s a good thing, isn’t it?” The King adds. “How do you feel about Sir Denji taking over for you?”
“I fully believe in his ability to lead the military. He’s more than capable,” Aki responds, images of the younger man pushed into a mature role at far too young flashing through his mind, briefly reminding him of himself.
The King looks over his shoulder at Aki again, a knowing glint in his eye.
Aki may as well be fully honest.
“He’s a bit impatient, but that will dissipate with age I’m sure.” Aki admits, one hand dangling at his side, with the other resting at the hilt of his sword.
The King hums and chuckles, agreeing quietly. “I’m sure no one could compare to you Sir Hayakawa, but alas I have a more important task for you.”
The King reaches a large door leading to the courtyard, sun blinding Aki’s eyes as he follows shortly behind. There’s a gaggle of guards training in the yard, wood swords being thrust in the air with low grunts filling the space. He’d trained here too once, long ago.
Several guards bow at the King, and remained bowed for Aki. He has some of the highest respect in the castle, save for the immediate royal family. It never feels normal, even if it has been for the past few years. Once acquainted with guards or fellow knights he quickly assured them that he doesn’t require such pleasantries.
He was wondering where the King was leading him, though.
“Your Highness-“ Aki begins walking slightly forward, ensuring not to stand directly aside the King. He knows his place.
“There she is, the important task I have for you.” The King nods forward, Aki’s eyes following the direction.
The Princess.
You’re standing in the courtyard, with a guard beside you. You’re wearing a long red dress, the color deep and rich and surely meant to be beautiful, but the color reminds Aki of only one thing. You have a small grin on your face as you watch the guards spar, with your hands neatly folded in front of your waist.
“You’ll be assigned to her until further notice, I sure hope she doesn’t cause you too much trouble.” The King bellows, catching your attention.
You glance towards the King, noticing your father and his entourage. Your eyes find Aki and he would be a liar if he said his lungs didn't stop for just a moment.
The rumors were true. You’re stunning. The light catches your hair perfectly, giving an unnatural glow to your face. Aki has heard his comrades mention before of your appearance, but he thought it was all heresy. Now he can most certainly attest that it is not.
You walk up slowly to your father, the guard beside you following closely. The castle grounds are the safest place in the nation, but you can never be too sure. That’s most of the reason Aki was reigned in here.
“Father,” you say, curtsing deep. “I thought you had a meeting right now.” You stand up tall, shoulders squared back as you look at the King.
You’ve spared Aki one glance since he’s arrived, but he finds himself craving it once more.
“Darling, I was. We finished and I was on my way back to my chambers when I noticed Sir Hayakawa in the halls.” The King looks over his shoulder at Aki. “He is to be your new Knight.”
Once his presence is announced, you finally give Aki your full attention. He keeps his head high for a moment before dropping to one knee, rehearsing the dance he learned long ago.
For the King and Princes, a bow. For the Queen and Princesses, a knee. For other members of the court, nothing.
You lift your hand up as if on cue, offering it to Aki. He takes it, delicately holding your palm in his hand. Truth be told, he’s not sure the last time he held something so dainty.
Aki raises his mouth to your hand, kissing the back while looking up at you. A small smile tugs at the side of your lips, polite and vague as Aki does so.
“Princess, it’s my honor to meet your acquaintance.” He means it.
“My honor to meet yours as well. I’ve heard many stories.” Your eyes follow him as he stands up once more. “I certainly look forward to hearing if they’re all true.”
Aki would never tell you the stories of his ventures. They were far too gruesome for a lady of your stature. Whether or not the tales told were accurate or not was to remain a mystery, at least as long as he could control it.
The King inhales deeply, eyes darting back and forth between the two of you. “Now that that’s all taken care of, I must depart.” His attendants and the guard who escorted Aki stand back. “If you need anything Sir Hayakawa, do not be afraid to ask.” An offer that Aki is sure he won't take.
He would never dream of taking something from the King.
The King excuses himself along with his entourage, and in the mess of people Aki notices the guard standing near you leaves as well. It’s just the two of you now facing each other.
“I was just out here to watch practice,” you start, facing the guards once more.
Aki lets his mind wander. He notices you aren’t standing on the parapet, which would have been more common. Royals tend to keep themselves above others in order to gaze down upon them. Yet here you are, standing on the same ground as the guards.
He watches you smile at the sparring. It doesn’t make him angry per se, but he does wonder if you know what they’re practicing for. They’re here to train to be a part of the royal guard or knights. Knights being on the front lines of war, while royal guards were the last line of defense for the crown - putting their life on the line should it require it, and sometimes it does. Both roles are incredibly dangerous, with many lives already having been lost.
Is this all entertainment to you?
It wouldn’t be the first time a royal has thought so.
“Do you come here often, Princess?” Aki inquires, walking to your side. “Does it not frighten you?”
“I like to stay up to date with what our subjects are doing,” you answer. “Plus, it looks like they’re having fun, does it not?”
Aki looks back at the guards and notices laughter flowing throughout the air. They’re all young, innocent from all the harm that may befall them in the future. Aki supposes he must be cynical; he’s been in the game for far too long and yet somehow not long enough. He can’t remember the last time he laughed like that.
“Yes, I suppose it does.” He replies, though he’s not sure if you were truly looking for one.
You look out of the corner of your eye and grin at him which he misses.
“Princess, you must return to your chambers at once!” A feminine voice yells, each syllable more frazzled than the last.
Aki and you turn in sync, watching as a short brunette woman rushes over.
“I’ve been looking for you everywhere Princess-“ she catches her breath. “Your lessons are well passed due.”
You give a tight lipped smile and nod. Aki doesn’t interject, knowing it’s his place to only provide assistance when needed, and when he isn’t needed he plans on just being a quiet fly on the wall.
“My apologies Kobeni, I was only taking a short recess. We need to go over details of the dance, correct?”
“Yes. There will also be dress fittings.” Kobeni’s eyes slide over to Aki. He can tell she’s wondering who he is, and if he’ll be attending the dress fittings.
It’s not his place to introduce himself, so instead he waits like a dog, patiently and quietly.
“This is Sir Hayakawa, he is to be my knight.” His name slips off your tongue so easily, Aki finds himself wondering if you had ever uttered it before.
“I see, well, follow along then.” Kobeni turns around and rushes forward, not even glancing back to ensure the two of you are following.
You give a soft smile and walk after her. Aki trails behind you, going at a slower pace than his limbs are normally used to due to his height. He keeps in mind to stay right behind you.
“There’s a dance to be had in two months time - the largest of the season.” You explain.
Aki doesn’t know much of dances, but he supposes this is what his life is going to be like going forward. A far cry from battle. Although, maybe it’s a battle in its own right.
“I have to practice for it. Dressings, etiquette, dancing,”
Aki listens intently. You don’t sound as though you’re complaining, which is a bit of a shock to him. He could never imagine having to prepare for something like that.
“Do you practice with the other royals?” He asks, looking at the back of your head.
You’re easier to talk to than he would’ve imagined. He doesn’t feel as though he needs to hold his tongue as much.
“No, this dance is for me.” Your voice echoes in the halls of the castle once you enter.
The rock encasing the castle ensures the inside stays nice and cool, perhaps a bit too cool, and it would have been considerably darker if not for the candles hung on every wall along with the large windows.
“It’s for suitors.” You finish, and Aki detects a hint of emotion in that sentence, more emotion then he’s heard from you thus far, even though it was barely anything.
“Sounds exciting,” Aki isn’t quite sure how to respond.
He doesn’t know too much about the process of marriage for royals. He knows more often than not it is for military gain, joining two kingdoms together in peace. Less than rarely is it out of love. Aki isn’t sure he knows of a case where it is.
There are a long list of men your age (just a few years Aki’s junior) in the nearing kingdoms, all of different statuses. As there is no other heir to succeed the position in this kingdom, sexism be damned, you were more than likely to be wed to a Prince for his kingdom. Unless your father and mother could produce another heir, a male heir (which was unlikely) you would be tasked with producing two male heirs. One for this kingdom, and one for the next. Aki didn't want to think about what would happen if your body wasn’t up to the task.
“You think so?” Your tone is calculating in the way royals usually speak, trying to find a hidden meaning. Royals are good for one thing and that’s the art of communication. They excel at discussing topics without outright saying them.
Aki knows they are trained from a young age to navigate tough discussions, to use their words to disarm others. It’s a talent Aki can admire, he was never particularly good with his words. Awkward and stilted, conversation was never really important for battle.
“I suppose so. I imagine dances are fun,” he says, never having attended a formal royal one.
You faintly smile and agree softly, leaving Aki to wonder what your hidden agenda was.
“What do you think of Kobeni?” You ask.
“She seems nice, perhaps a little frazzled.”
You chuckle at that and there goes Aki’s lungs again, stalling as if he’s forgotten how to breathe, as if his endurance built up over all of these years has amounted to nothing.
“Yes, well, she’s been that way for quite some time. She doesn’t look it but she’s much older than me. She raised me for most of my childhood, she was my wet nurse in fact. Mother was far too busy.”
That surprised Aki as he would not have guessed her to be your senior by that many years. When the two of you finally reach your room, much to Kobeni's impatience, Aki takes a good look at her face once more. There’s wrinkle lines around her eyes and mouth where there would not be otherwise.
The normal code would suggest Aki follows you unless you dismiss him, but he does find the back of his neck getting hot at the idea of being here for a dress fitting. He’s not sure what that entails, but it sounds like it would be immodest for him to attend, the sight most likely reserved for your future husband.
“Sir Hayakawa, you can stand guard out here while I change. Once we’ve found the dress you may enter.” You walk into your room, “thank you for your service.”
Aki keeps his face neutral even though the compliment surprises him. He had hardly done anything thus far, aside from guiding you to your chambers. He had fought numerous wars without hearing a peep of gratitude, so the feeling is foreign to him, yet not entirely unwelcome. “Of course, Princess. Call out if you need anything.”
Kobeni shuts the door behind you, leaving Aki to guard your door alone. If he listens closely he can hear faint talking in your room, various handmaidens assisting you in changing.
Though this job was much safer than his last, it was also much more boring. He’s halfway through counting the stones beneath his feet when the door behind him opens. Aki turns around and looks into your room, finding you in front of a mirror, adorned by a gown. It was a deep blue, the length of it nearly swallowing you whole. You’re admiring the dress when you meet his gaze reflecting in the mirror, which causes you to sheepishly look away.
“It’s not entirely fitted yet, although this will be the dress I’m going to wear.” You tell him, refusing to meet his eyes.
“You look lovely, Princess.” Aki murmurs, his attention drifting from your jaw, to your collarbone, to your dress.
It’s a compliment he doles out without even thinking. You really do look like a Queen, even if you currently weren’t one.
You bite your lip and dip your head, your fingers starting to pull at the dress in a sign of embarrassment.
Once the moment is over you watch Kobeni talk with the two handmaidens, giving instructions on what they need to do next. “Kobeni, was that all for the day? I'm quite tired.”
Kobeni stops mid sentence with the handmaidens. She looks as though she’s running on fumes, her mouth pulled downward in a frown. “Yes Princess. Let me assist in changing your clothes first, then I will take my leave so you can rest.”
“No, it’s fine Kobeni, I think I can manage. Thank you. Why don’t you take a break?” You offer, turning towards her.
Kobeni looks like she wants to argue but refrains from doing so, instead ushering out the other girls while you watch. You thank her and the other handmaidens before they take their leave, leaving the two of you alone.
“Well, I suppose I will give you some privacy then.” Aki says, excusing himself.
“Yes, it shouldn’t take me very long.” You agree.
Aki steps out again and closes the door, knowing you must change before he can lay his eyes on you once more.
The sight before him even just now was a treasure, the presence of the Princess wearing such fine clothing. It was a sight most would only dream of seeing.
He begins counting the stones again, nearly forgetting where he had ended off last time when he hears your voice.
“Sir Hayakawa, will you help me for a moment?”
Aki turns around again and opens the door, peeking his head in. He assumes you’ve finished dressing, perhaps needing help to put the dress away. The sight before him is far different. You’re still standing in front of your mirror, arms bent behind your back while you attempt to unbutton your dress. Aki quickly looks away as soon as he sees a hint of skin.
“I can’t reach the last one,” you sound clipped, patting behind you to reach the final button.
Aki flicks his gaze up to you once more before peeking his head out into the hallway again, making sure no one is around. He’s not doing anything wrong necessarily, his job is to help you with whatever you need. Even if that was the case, it still felt so scandalous.
He steps inside, closing the door quietly behind him before he strides up to you. He notices how small your hands look compared to his. Aki locates the final button, noting there were still ribbons to be undone as well.
“They make these difficult, don’t they?” He murmurs, unbuttoning the final button, noticing how the dress becomes looser.
You're holding it up with a hand on your chest, watching in the mirror.
“Yes, they honestly do. I was hoping I could take it off myself but that seems to not be the case.” You let out a soft laugh at that, a poke at your own foolishness.
Aki’s fingers skillfully pull the ribbon loose, catching a glimpse of your bare back before he looks away. Under any other circumstance the sight would not be considered out of the ordinary. He’s seen his fair share of royals before and on occasion their dress will reveal their backs more. Even so, this does not feel the same.
“Thank you Sir Hayakawa, you’re dismissed. I will call for you once I’m done.”
He turns around and waits in the hallway, recounting the sight of your small hands and soft skin until he hears your voice through the wood. You open the door before he has a chance, once more wearing your red dress.
“I thought you were tired, Princess?” He expected that you would want to rest in your room for the remainder of the day.
“Quite. Let’s wander, shall we?”
You’re confusing. You’re nothing like the previous royals he’s met so far. You have some traits that are typical, such as the way you seem to speak in riddles. Other than that you’re different. You’ve thanked multiple staff since he’s arrived, and you’ve let him touch you, even if it was innocent.
Aki follows you out, unsure where the final destination is but knowing he’ll protect you nonetheless.
You walk outside, waving at the children who pass by, their parents certainly working for the crown. He wants to ask where you’re going but holds his tongue, still unsure of what he can say. You’re easy to talk to, sure, but you’re still above him in ranking. He would never want to overstep.
It isn’t until you are far out of the castle's bounds, feet navigating through long grass in a field when you speak again.
“I used to come out here all the time when I was a child,” you say, walking slower until you near a large oak. “Still do sometimes, though I’m much more busy.”
Aki understands why you liked the field. The area is quieter than the castle, not another soul in sight. He thinks it might be dangerous due to it being deserted but assures himself that if an attacker were to come then they would most certainly be located quickly.
“It’s nice.” Aki stops by the tree, watching as you walk several feet forward until you come to a stop, lowering yourself to sit on the grass below.
You’ll get your dress dirty, perhaps Aki should have come more prepared to offer you clothing to lay upon. Next time, he thinks.
“Princess, your dress-“ He rests a hand on his sword, looking over the field slowly.
“I know, it’s okay.” You run your hands through the grass as your shoulders sag. “Sir Violence said the same thing every time I came out here. I do miss him.”
That’s a shock. Sir Violence was your previous knight. Rumor has it that you were the one who fired him, although the action seems almost out of character now that Aki’s met you. Still, royals have their reasons, and their temperaments can be finicky at best.
Aki remains quiet, looking forward as though he hasn’t been granted to look at the sight below.
“You’re wondering where he is, aren’t you?” You ask, and Aki can feel your gaze on him.
Aki was. Sir Violence had been one of the higher up knights, responsible and kind. From what he heard he liked being your knight, so Aki felt bad when he heard the news that you had fired him.
“Yes, but it is none of my business.” Aki answers honestly, as doing so has gotten him the furthest.
“I fired him.” Hearing the words come from your mouth was even more shocking.
Aki feels a strike of anger, knowing Sir Violence enough to know he wouldn’t have done anything to warrant such action. It’s the first time he’s felt the emotion towards you, and he doesn’t like how it lays on his shoulders, heavy and wrong.
“Did he offend you, Princess?”
“No, not at all. His wife became with child.” Oh. Aki did not know that. “My knights have to be with me from sunrise to sun down. It seemed rather cruel to have him with me for that long, knowing he had a wife and babe waiting on him.”
Aki did not expect that. He looks down at you, finding you already looking up at him. He quickly moves his eyes back forward again.
“I set up a job for him in the city. He’s to be the next chief.” That job paid handsomely.
“That was very kind of you,” Aki murmurs, sheepish from how he jumped to conclusions. There would have been no ulterior motive for you to do that for Violence.
“I felt awfully selfish,” you mumbled, tucking your legs beneath you. “However, I am glad that it led me to meeting you.”
Aki fidgets with the handle of his sword. He’s not used to upfront compliments, not used to the way it makes his forehead sweat as if he was just in battle.
“Thank you, Princess.” Aki knows he shouldn’t let his feelings get too close to the job, but you’re making it awfully difficult.
“You know, you can call me by my given name.” You say your name as if it isn’t common knowledge in the kingdom. “I would be okay with it.” You hesitate for a moment like you have more to say. “Can I call you by your name as well?” There’s the greediness Aki half expected when he started the job, but he finds that it doesn’t turn him off. “We’re going to be spending a lot of time together, after all.”
“That would be immodest, Princess.” He stands his ground, though he knows he isn’t too strict on the situation, and would give up if you pushed him enough. He half expects you to, half wants you to.
He wants to set clear boundaries. He knows that all he is is your knight, and that is all he will ever be.
Still.
Would you press the matter further?
Why does he want you to anyway?
“I suppose it is, isn’t it?” You fold in on yourself a bit. Aki can taste the disappointment in the air, thick like blood.
He clenches his jaw, unsure how to navigate the situation. When he doesn’t say anything back you drop the conversation, choosing to watch the field and the sun above.
You spend the next hour or two telling Aki about the upcoming dance, and all that it entails. There were bound to be countless people, which meant countless opportunities for harm to befall you. Aki would rather die than let that happen. Whether you preferred him or not, your safety belonged to him now. It was not a decision that came lightly to Aki.
The two of you lose track of how long you’ve been out here, but he knows you can’t remain here forever.
“Ready to return, Princess?”
You flick your eyes up to him, facial expression dissatisfied but wordless. He thinks you probably want to stay out here for even longer. Aki doesn’t know how strict the King and Queen are with you yet. He imagines a little due to the fact you felt the need to sneak out here.
You stand up, stretching you arms up far above your head. “Thank you for coming with me,” you say, a small grin on your face.
Even though he was only here because it was his job, he still feels his heart flutter nonetheless. Aki follows silently as you walk back to the castle.
“I’ll have more lessons for the dance,” you murmur, giving him the details of what your day would look like. “I hope it won’t be too terribly boring for you, Sir Hayakawa.”
“I think I’ll be fine,” he reassures, giving a small smile as a way to return the kindness you had given him.
~~~
He has no idea how he got here. One second ago he was bidding you good night, then the next he was following you down the dark hall with nothing but a tiny candle in your hand to lead the way. You had asked him if he wanted a treat but he had no idea what that meant.
Aki was standing outside your bedroom keeping watch, about ready to leave for his chambers when you poked your head out of your door, a mischievous grin on your face. You wore only a thin nightgown and it made Aki’s skin hot. You offered no further explanation, only a promise that he wouldn’t regret it as he followed you in the halls.
He’s been your knight for a month yet you still find new ways to surprise him every day.
“Princess, I’m sure we could find some castle workers if we need to.” Aki starts once you reach the kitchen.
It’s empty, the remaining chefs having gone home for the day. Aki almost feels like he shouldn’t be here, like he’ll be caught any second doing something he shouldn’t be doing.
You are the Princess though, and short of the King or Queen reaching out to you then the two of you would be okay.
“No! I know a recipe,” you chuckle, digging around for a bowl. “Plus, isn’t it more fun this way?” You flash a dangerous smile towards Aki and he has to force himself to look away, lest he stare for too long.
Once you’ve gathered all the ingredients you need, you finally tell Aki that the two of you are going to be making chocolate chip cookies.
“It’s one of Kobeni’s recipes. Used to make them when I was a kid.” You tell him, tossing flour and eggs into a bowl.
He hasn’t had cookies in ages. The memory of them is like a whisper in the back of his mind. Images of a stool beneath his feet and his moms gentle hands guiding him, her voice soft as she tells him what he needs to do next.
“Are they your favorite?” He asks, eyes drawn to the way you mix ingredients.
You ponder for a moment before answering. “Yeah, I would say so. When I was little I would sneak bites of the dough too.” You say. “Do you like them Sir Hayakawa? I hope you do.”
“Yeah, I like them.” He thinks he does anyway.
“Great!” You smile before looking back down at the table.
You’re beautiful. No doubt in his mind that you were meant for royalty.
“Would you mind cutting the chocolate? I’m sure you’re much better with a knife than I.” You chuckle, the sound like a cool glass of water on Aki’s ears.
Aki smiles and agrees, beginning to chop up the chocolate into tiny pieces. The two of you fall into an easy rhythm, with you instructing Aki on what to do next. The sleeves of your night gown are rolled up clumsily and there’s a dash of flour on your cheek. Aki isn’t quite sure how that ended up there.
“Do you sneak down here often to make these?” Aki asks, watching as you get the flame ready.
It makes him a bit nervous, his fingers starting to itch wanting to stop you so he can take over. He thinks you should depend on him a little more, but he supposes that will come with time.
“I used to do it more often. Kobeni would come with me, but one night we got caught and it freaked her out so bad she refused to do it again. We didn’t get in any trouble but still…” you turn back towards him.
He can’t help but let his eyes flick down to your mouth as you talk. Aki notices how plush your lips look, how they curl around each syllable when you speak.
He’s a fool, he thinks as he pulls his eyes away from you.
You are the Princess.
Aki stirs the dough around, the final step before placing them on a pan to bake. He’s about to take the spoon out to put in the sink before you quickly stop him.
“Wait!”
He raises his brow, waiting on further instruction.
“Is it alright if I lick the spoon first?” You ask, as if he could ever say no to you. Partly for his duty, but also due to something else. Something much more hot and tingly that curls in his body if he thinks about it for too long.
Aki lifts the spoon up, holding it sideways for you to take. You don’t do that. Instead, you walk up towards him and stick your tongue out, allowing it to trail along the side of the spoon. Aki sees the way dough covers your tongue before you bring it back inside your mouth, a smile on your lips. A feeling bubbles inside his gut and he can’t look away.
“It’s so good, Sir Hayakawa! You must try it as well.”
He can’t say no to that.
Instead of getting a new utensil like a reasonable man would do, he nibbles on the opposite side of the spoon, watching you as he does it. There’s a grin on your face and the sight is sweeter than the dough on his tongue.
“That is really good, Princess.”
“I know right!”
Everything after that happens in a flash. He’s still stuck on the moment between you when the two of you form balls on the pan, before you place it into the wood stove.
You sit across each other at the table while you wait for the cookies.
“Thank you for doing this with me, I’m sure you’d rather be in bed.” You murmur, looking away from Aki.
He really cannot think of anywhere else he’d rather be.
“Of course, Princess.” He wants to tell you that he’s having fun, but the words fail him.
Once the cookies are done the two of you plate them, and share them beside candle light at the table. They’re warm and they’re tasty, the chocolate melting in Aki’s mouth as he chews them.
When he accepted the job offer he was not expecting midnight rendezvous with the Princess, but that’s what he's got, and so far he is more than happy with the arrangement.
~~~
It’s the night of the dance and light fill the ballroom, laughter and conversation bouncing off the walls. There must have been a few hundred people on the castle grounds already, which caused Aki’s nerves to tingle. He didn’t want to be too stingy, he knew it was one of your only times to truly socialize. Aki could be patient. He was good at that.
Aki waits at the bottom of a large staircase, a plush rug filling out the space below him. He was instructed to wait here while Kobeni gave you finishing touches. You had been getting ready for what felt like an hour. It seemed like an awful lot of prep in order to meet one man. The event was held specifically for Prince Kurose. He was of a neighboring nation, just as Aki had suspected. There was no animosity between your kingdom and his, but a union between the two of you would only strengthen the bond.
It had only taken a few weeks for the King's advisors to decide on which suitor would fit best. Aki was under the impression this dance was to meet all of them so you could decide, but he supposes that was wishful thinking. Unless tonight goes terribly, you were to be wed to Prince Kurose. Tonight was just a formality.
Aki notices the room get significantly quieter. There could be only one reason for that. As he turns around he notices you walking down the steps, Kobeni in tow as she holds the bottom of your dress. Stunning. Aki doesn’t blink as you descend from the stairs, your gaze locked on the crowd below. He holds the hilt of his sword tighter, admiration flowing throughout his blood stream. If he had it his way he would rush up the staircase and offer help immediately, but he needed to wait.
He’s grown fairly fond of you over the past two months. He would never admit it out loud for it would be out of place, but he quite enjoys your presence. He likes knowing he gets to protect you every day. It’s an honor. Not only that but he likes knowing he gets to see you every day. You’re more talkative than he would have figured. You’ve told him many stories since he’s arrived, and he’s memorized each and every one, locking them away in his brain to tell himself late at night when he goes to bed.
Aki’s become something more of a confidant, a friend even, although he would never say so in front of the King. First and foremost he is your knight. He knows this. Even so, he’s gotten attached.
The two of you would go to the field often. You’d take a break and sit on the grass while Aki stood several feet away, always by the tree to give you distance. Over time he slowly started inching closer and closer so he could hear you better. He reasoned he would be able to protect you more that way, but he knew it was a farce.
After a month and a half you asked him once more, “Sir Hayakawa, what’s your name?”
He looked up at the branches on the tree, only standing three feet from you now, knowing you would only keep asking. There’s no harm in telling you his name. It was more scandalous to help you undress and he had done that within hours of meeting you.
“Aki. My name is Aki.”
After speaking he looks at you once more, your eyes already glued to his form. Your fists are clenched in the grass below and there are stars in your eyes.
“Aki.” You repeat.
His name has never sounded so good before. He knows it.
“That’s correct.” Aki clears his throat, already sure that if he doesn’t he’ll ask you to repeat his name again and again.
“Could I call you that instead?” A kind Princess. A greedy Princess.
“I will not stop you.” He hopes you do.
He’s dancing a thin line between what’s appropriate and what’s not. He’s your knight. He also cares about you. It only took you forty-five days to crawl inside of his brain.
“Aki,” you say, looking up at him once you reach the foot of the stairs, dragging him back into the present.
He allows himself to smile at you. He’s only given you a handful (he tries to be serious, he really does), but each time he gives you one he means it. He means it from the bottom of his heart.
“Princess,” he greets you back, raising an arm up as an offering.
You look beautiful, he wants to state. You look more beautiful than the moon, his throat asks him to speak. I wish it was just the two of us, alone, like on the field. Don’t you wish that too, his mouth almost says.
He doesn’t utter a word.
Remember your place. Always remember your place.
You take it, gratefully and greedy, holding him close to you. Aki guides you further into the party, where you greet others as they bow to you. Aki brings you to the food tables, where drinks and treats line the area in large amounts. He hadn’t allowed himself to indulge, of course wanting to be of sound mind, but he urges you to do so if you wish.
You grab a glass, filled with what is Aki’s guess, and tilt your head back slightly to take a drink. The two of you stand there and people watch as you finish your glass, before you pick up an hor d’oeuvre. Aki stands silent as you eat, watching anyone who’s gaze lingers on you a bit too long.
“Have you heard of Prince Kurose’s arrival?” You question, passing your dirty dishes to a servant waiting to the side of a table.
“No, I have not.” Aki answers honestly. He should be here by now. “You know how the trails can be, perhaps his carriage is arriving late.”
You look uncertain when you nod. Aki notices you clenching his arm tighter in your hold. He feels a bit satisfied in the way you’re seeking him for comfort, but the feeling quickly turns to acid when he realizes how painfully selfish it is.
“You look handsome, Aki.” You say before immediately casting your gaze to the ground, as if the words fell from your mouth before you could stop them. They didn’t sound rehearsed or even elegant, they sounded real.
Aki’s cheeks tint pink and he hopes that no one can tell in the yellow light. “Thank you, Princess.”
Aki is wearing something of higher caliber. A satin shirt with matching pants with straps around his chest and thighs, along with a long black cape at his back. It took him an hour to get fitted for it, all the while Kobeni telling him he must look decent beside the Princess.
It seems a bit of a joke to him now. He knows he could never measure up to your beauty when standing next to you.
You fidget with your dress as your eyes dart about. He thinks you get nervous around loads of people, which should be ironic considering your stature.
“Are you okay?” He lets himself ask.
“Yeah, yeah I’m fine.” You reply quickly. Aki doesn’t believe you, and he thinks you don’t believe yourself either. “I’m going to do a lap of greeting people. I should be alright, there are guards everywhere. You’re free to take a break, if you would like.”
“I’ve hardly been here long, all I've done is stand over here.” I don’t deserve a break, he thinks.
I want to be near you more. Let me be near.
“How long were you waiting for me at the bottom of the stairs?” True. “Surely you must need a drink, or the bathroom.”
He lifts his arm up, letting you tug yourself away from him. “I’ll be fine, Aki.” You reassure him.
“If you insist. I will be here though.”
“I’m sure you will.” You tease, locking eyes with Aki before you slip away into the crowd.
You intended on greeting other royals. There may even be some more suitors here as well, intent on swooping you up should Prince Kurose fail. Aki tries not to dwell on the thought for too long. He tries not to dwell on the sour taste that sits on the back of his tongue at the thought of your suitors.
Aki says hello to those that pass him and make conversation. No matter how impolite, he keeps his eyes moving across the room while talking, searching for any sign that you may need help.
“Did you hear?” A voice near him says. He strains his ears to listen.
“They’re saying the Prince is a no show,” someone else responds.
Aki finds two women talking a yard from him. They look rich, heavy gowns on their bodies while they sip something powerful.
The Prince was a no show?
That couldn’t be true, right?
That being said, it is awfully late.
“I know, I feel so bad for the Princess.” The first woman murmurs.
Aki’s feet move immediately, taking him around the room. It's crowded in some areas, so he has to squeeze by. His mind starts to race the longer he can’t locate you. Surely you were still in this room, right? Perhaps he should walk up the stairs to get a better vantage point-
Aki passes by a table with seats, noticing all but one is empty. You sit alone, eyes glued to the floor. Anger flares in his gut at the sight. Just where was Prince Kurose? Had he had something better to do?
“Princess,” Aki says softly, although part of him wanted to say your name, if only to see a smile pop up on your face.
You quickly find him, your eyes wide as saucers. It’s almost as if you’ve been caught doing something you shouldn’t have, but you haven’t done anything wrong. All you’ve done is wait up for a sorry excuse of a Prince.
“Hello, Aki.” You stand up, walking close to him.
He can smell the scents Kobeni had doused you in prior to the dance. Something sweet and delicate, just like you.
“I was looking for you.” He admits.
“I’m sorry. I was just taking a break,” you gesture to the table beside you. “Have you heard?” You ask. “They’re saying he’s not going to show. Prince Kurose, I mean.”
There’s an unrecognizable emotion on your face.
“I have. Are you okay, Princess?”
He knows the answer to that. Of course you aren’t. The Prince has made a fool of you tonight.
“Yeah. I’m…” you look over the people in the ballroom. Some are talking, others are eating, and there’s a small group in the middle swaying.
You spent all of those hours practicing for a pathetic excuse of a man.
Aki makes up his mind. He offers up a hand, eyes on yours until you hesitantly take it.
“Would you like to dance?” He asks, forcing the nerves inside his body to simmer down.
Your eyes light up and Aki decides he’s going to continue doing whatever it is he needs to in order to make it happen again.
“It would be a shame if you didn’t get to, don’t you think?” Aki says, reasoning that it’s less selfish this way. “You still should have a good night.” Princes be damned.
You smile and follow him through the crowd, allowing him to lead you. Your hand is much more softer than his in his grip, so he tries to loosen himself. Once the two of you make it to the middle, he faces you, holding his arms out in a traditional waltz position.
You eye him closely, grabbing onto him, waiting for him to lead as the man typically does.
“You know how to dance?” You question, disbelief appearing on your face.
“I may be a commoner, but I’m not a beast.” He replies, teasing.
It’s partly true. If you’ve seen half of what Aki’s done on the battlefield he wonders if you’d see him as a beast. Would you still let him near you if you knew of the damage he’s caused? Would you still let him hold you softly if you knew what his hands have done? Would you still say his name just as tenderly if you knew what he was capable of?
You laugh anyway, because you don’t know the half of it.
The music guides the two of you, and you dance. You dance. It’s easy to get lost in it, lost in the strums of music and in your smile. Aki can’t remember the last time he had this much fun. His heart thrums, but instead of fear in his veins he finds something else. Something sweeter, something softer.
The Prince never shows, and Aki is partly upset by the fact. He’s also glad that he gets this chance with you. No other suitor dares to step forward while Aki has his hands on you, and a surge of pride douses his system.
If it weren’t for all the stares Aki could delude himself into thinking this was like any other night, where statuses didn’t matter. You were just a kind beautiful woman in a dress, and he was just a man who couldn’t imagine being anywhere else.
~~~
You’re quieter today. Aki wonders if it’s a result of the dance, if Kurose’s refusal to show up affected more than you led on. He wouldn’t be surprised. There were discussions happening if Prince Kurose was off the table for marriage. His reason for not showing had never been revealed. The Queen said they should look for different suitors, while the King argued that a stronger relationship with Prince Kurose’s nation was too important.
You’re sitting near him, head low as you pick at the grass. Aki can’t take his eyes off you cause he feels like he should say something, knows he should say something.
He tries to decide what would make you feel better when you speak before he gets the chance.
“Can I tell you a secret, Aki?”
Uncharted territory. This is one of those situations where he’s leaning less towards being your knight and more towards something else. He reminds himself that he’s already crossed over the line from just being your knight. Though up until now you’ve never told him a secret before, and he’ll have to decide if it’s something he must report to the King.
You’re waiting on a response.
It’s harmless by itself, and he really wants to know what you have to say.
“Of course, Princess.”
You sigh, looking forward intently as if you see something he doesn’t.
“I don’t wish to be wed.”
For all the things you could have said, he wasn’t expecting that. He hated the idea of being forced into a marriage, so he understood. Aki remains quiet to give you room to speak.
When you don’t, he opens himself up. “Now?”
“Now. To Prince Kurose.”
It made sense.
Aki wants to sit beside you to offer some form of comfort, but your safety is more important. He remains standing. “Have you talked to the King? Could they choose another suitor? I don’t think it would be unreasonable.”
“I don’t want to be married under the crown.” You answer. “I don’t want someone to choose for me.” Your voice is soft, a tinge of shame in your words.
He bites his lip because he isn’t sure what to say to that. It was custom to have the King and Queen choose a husband for their daughter. There wasn’t a way around it.
“It’s for the good of the country, I know that…” You go on. He wants you to be more selfish. “I don’t want to be shipped off to another kingdom where my voice doesn’t matter.” Where you’ll be forgotten.
Aki wonders if you might be crying, but when he looks down at you, taking a peek at the side of your face he notices that you aren’t. You have a blank stare. He realizes you do see something he doesn’t see, and that he can’t understand. You’re looking at your future.
A future where you have no bodily autonomy despite being the Queen of a nation, because you’re the Queen of a nation. Aki’s stomach feels queasy. Any words of encouragement he may have had prior to this conversation die on the tip of his tongue as he watches your shoulders deflate.
The rules of this game were set in motion far before the two of you were even conjured into existence. You were a Princess, soon to be Queen, whose duties depended on the needs of her kingdom and Aki was a knight who would return to war in one year's time, name surely to be forgotten when someone eventually gets the best of him.
“I’m sorry, Princess.” He was. He truly, truly was.
“It’s alright,” you reply, looking up towards him, a small smile playing on your lips. “I just wanted to get that off my chest. Thank you, Aki.”
“Of course.” He wishes he knew how to respond better. There must be something he can say to you.
“Is it okay if we stay out here a little bit longer?” You ask.
“Yeah,” he would give you the world and everything in it if he could, but he is just a man so he cannot, but he can stand beside you in the field for as long as you want.
~~~
It’s the middle of the night.
Aki was excused of his daily duties two hours ago, and it took him awhile to rest fully. The conversation the two of you had earlier in the day had been replaying in his mind.
He had been resting for the past hour when the screaming started. He wakes up with a jolt, reaching for the sword beside his bed in a blind panic. His room is dark, but he can see torches from outside run by his window.
Something is wrong.
He throws on a loose shirt, fumbling on his shoes while reaching for his door.
“What do we do?” Someone yells just outside Aki’s window.
Something is wrong.
He thinks he hears your name being shouted outside.
Something is wrong.
Aki can’t breathe as he runs down the hall, straight to the doors leading outside. There's a black hole where his lungs normally are as he scans the area. It’s the same area where he first met you, where the guards train. Normally it’s empty this time of night, but right now it’s filled with various castle workers and torches.
“Somebody get the King!” A handmaiden yells.
Aki’s eyes fly around to see what the commotion is about. Stay calm. It’s what he’s good at, he’s been able to stay calm during numerous wars but he can’t get his body under control right now.
He needs to find you.
Aki’s gaze follows where everyone is looking, their heads tilted back as they yell.
There you are.
You stand on the parapet, hundreds of feet up in the air. You’re wearing only your thin nightgown, a sight that would normally make Aki’s cheeks pinken but now it only causes concern because of how frigid the temperature is.
Your hair is blowing in the wind and your feet are on the edge and fuck, what the hell is going on?
Servants are trying to yell up at you but you don’t respond, your eyes in a trance as you stare at the ground below.
“Princess!” Aki yells, not a drop of sleep in his voice.
He runs closer, mind already racing with what he can do.
“Why isn’t anyone stopping her?” Someone asks beside him. “We should be able to drag her back from behind!”
“She blocked off the door!” Someone responds.
Fuck.
Could Aki scale the building in time?
There's no way.
Could he catch you?
Does he trust himself enough to catch you?
Aki swears he can see tears in your eyes as you work up the courage. He has no idea what’s going through your mind right now, but all he can focus on is the need to stop you. He makes a split second decision, turning around to run back into the castle. Castle workers run the opposite way, wanting to make a spectacle out of your decision.
Just as he had overheard, there are several guards banging on the door leading to the parapet. Once Aki rushes up the steps he sets his sword down.
“Move!” He yells.
The three guards step back with wide eyes, watching as Aki throws his whole body against the door. The side of his shoulder burns once he makes contact. You really did block it well. Aki rams himself into the door again, ears picking up on the sound of wood splitting.
He needs to get to you.
It takes two more tries before the door breaks down and Aki sees your back. It’s so high up here. This area was meant to keep watch over the entire grounds and then some. Aki runs, your form getting closer and closer. He doesn’t have time. He thinks he overhears himself shouting your name, not Princess or any form of honorific but your name.
He isn't going to make it.
As soon as he’s a foot away from yanking you back, you step off the ledge. A crowd of screams come from below. By some miracle, Aki’s able to reach out and grab your arm in time. The bricks below crush his chest as he falls forward, putting all his strength in his upper body, and he’s holding onto your arm as tight as he can while you dangle from the wall.
“Why did you do that?!” You yell, the first time Aki had ever heard any hint of anger in your voice.
There's a mixture of cheering and yells from below as the castle workers hold their breath, unsure if he’ll be able to pull you back up.
Aki would rather die than let go.
He doesn’t answer, instead choosing to focus all his power on pulling you back, ignoring the way the brick scraps at his skin.
Aki manages to lift you up, falling backwards onto his ass with you between his legs. He wraps his arms around you tight, closing his eyes as he counts his lucky stars.
You’re struggling against him, and even though his arm feels weak from holding you over the wall, he’s still strong enough to hold you down, and he takes every shove and push easily.
“Let me go!” You yell, tears flowing down your face now.
“No!” He replies, body stiff until a group of guards come rushing up the steps.
Why were you going to do that? Why did you wish to die so badly? Aki was missing a piece of the puzzle, he’s sure of it. He needs to find out just what happened to you.
~~~
It’s been several hours after your attempt, the sun having finally come up and Aki hasn’t seen you since. You had been locked in your room without visitors, only allowed to see the King and Queen along with the castle doctor. He examined you over and over to look for what was wrong, but there was nothing. You were in clean health. A sickness of the mind, he murmured to the King and Queen, voice just loud enough for Aki to hear. Aki had known all too well what that meant. He had seen others go through it multiple times over the years. He went through it himself when his family passed.
Aki’s been right outside your door the entire time, waiting on further instruction on whether or not he’s allowed into your room.
Once he finally gets permission, he can’t believe his eyes.
The King and Queen stand in your room, frowns filling their faces as they stare at you. The King is touted as being a kind man, but Aki has been hearing him yell at you for the past hour.
Something about shame, something about royal duties.
“Sir Hayakawa, we wanted to discuss the situation with you.” The King acknowledges his presence so Aki straightens his back.
“You understand that the news mustn’t get out, correct?” He goes on. “People must not find out what she tried to do.”
“It would make us look crazy.” The Queen murmurs.
Aki nearly flinches at that. She spits the word like it’s poison.
“Others will think we don’t know how to manage our daughter, and if we don’t know how to manage our daughter then how are we to manage a kingdom?” The King says. His eyes dart to you, where he lets out a sigh. “Why would you be so reckless?” He asks, the words uncaring.
It’s clear that they aren’t worried for your sake, but more for the sake of your image. They’ve never been unkind parents to Aki’s knowledge, never striking you or speaking vitriol.
The kingdom always comes first, though.
“Keep watch over her, Sir Hayakawa. Her handmaidens need a break.” The Queen speaks, looking at Aki as if she doesn’t see you in the room at all.
“Surely, Your Highness.” Aki bows as the King starts to make his exit, remaining in the position until he hears them leave the room.
You’re laid up on your bed, face devoid of any emotion as you stare at the ceiling. Your window that used to be open constantly to allow fresh air in was now sealed shut, a counter measure to ensure you didn’t make the same mistake again.
The handmaiden who had let Aki in leaves, eyes stuck on the floor as she quietly shuts the door. It’s like no one wants to look at you. Aki knows he should be the one to speak first, but he finds himself at a loss for words. What can he say? You tried to kill yourself. If Aki hadn’t been there, and he nearly wasn’t, you would have hit the ground.
“It’s good to see you again, Princess.” He decides on, because it’s true.
You turn your head slightly and look at him, and Aki has to force himself to remain still. You’re looking through him. Your face looks lifeless, almost like a painting in front of him.
“Why did you save me?” You question after awhile, your voice almost too quiet to hear.
There were many reasons.
He couldn’t stand to see another person die.
It was his job.
But above all else, because he cared for you.
He cared for you in a way he could have never seen coming.
“Because I wanted to.” He answers.
“For the kingdom?”
“For myself.”
You look distrustful at that. You look like you want to argue back, but the words just won't come to your mouth because you’re too exhausted.
It’s just the two of you, so Aki steps over and sits on a chair beside your bed. He says your name for the first time, which causes your lips to twitch. Not a smile, not by a long shot but close enough for Aki to consider it a win.
“Why did you do it, Princess?” Aki questions softly. He needs to know why so he can help you avoid it in the future.
“I knew the dance would be the last time I would fully enjoy myself.” You reply.
The dance. Where you spent nearly the entire night together.
Aki looks at you and doesn’t blink.
He should have known you were not well after hearing you talk about your secret. Hours later you stood atop the parapet, wanting to end it all.
He should have realized. The way you were talking yesterday should have tipped him off. He’s a fool. He’s supposed to be your biggest protector yet he couldn’t save you from one of the biggest threats. Yourself.
“Princess…”
“You don’t have to say anything.” You talk over him. “I know I’m being dramatic.”
He wants to tell you that you aren’t being dramatic. Every feeling you have no matter how fleeting is valid. “I don’t think you are.” Fuck, why can’t he be better at this?
You look away from him, refusing to argue but also not fully agreeing with his opinion.
Aki stays at his post beside your bed for hours, and hours turn into days. He stays by you while the doctors try nursing your mind back into health, or at least healthy enough to be concealed.
He talks more often than you do. The roles are reversed now. Instead of the field, vast and empty except your voice filling the air, it is now your room, claustrophobic with people coming in and out constantly while Aki makes conversation. He tries his best to talk as often as he can, even when you don’t respond, which you usually don’t.
“Why did you become a knight, Aki?” You ask one night.
Your eyes have a little bit more light in them. It’s been two weeks since the fateful night, and you seem to be almost on the mend.
Aki wants to say ‘I don’t know.’ It would be much easier if he did. He wouldn’t need to explain his life story, but he realized he didn’t mind if it was to you.
“When I was a child, my family got killed in a war.” He says, looking at your floor. “I never found out who did it, but I wanted to join the military to try.” It was his life’s mission in fact. “I wanted revenge.”
He didn’t admit that part of him feels like he has to. He wanted to, of course, but it also felt as though there were no other choices. He was a prisoner to it, locked down until he was able to satiate the monster inside of him. Aki realizes the two of you might be in similar situations. You’re sealed off in your room, the Princess of a nation who must attend to her duties, chained to your family name. Aki understands he’s chained to the past, a slave to his own decisions.
“Have you found it, Aki?” You ask. “Revenge.”
That’s the thing. He hasn’t.
“You must have, or else you wouldn’t have accepted the offer to be my knight.”
Why did he accept it? He’s glad he did now, of course. However, he could have easily denied the King, told him the ground needed him much more. It would have been a risky move, but the King had granted him his wishes up until this point.
If he stayed on the ground he could have continued seeking revenge for his family. Was that what he still wanted? Did he subconsciously reach a hand out when accepting this offer, his inner thoughts telling him that enough was enough?
“No,” He takes a gulp of air. “No, I didn’t find it.”
You avoid meeting his eyes and he knows he must have made it awkward. He needs to fix the situation. He needs you to know he doesn’t regret coming here.
“I’m glad I left though.” He’s being honest when he says that, even though he never thought that idea would be possible in a million years. “I’m glad I met you.”
“Don’t do that.” Your voice is soft, sadness leaking from your words.
“Do what?” He inches closer, kneeling beside your bed now.
You sit up, finally looking his way. Your brows are creased, and it looks like you have a million things to say. “Don’t say what you don’t mean.”
Aki murmurs your name and he would have thought you took a knife to the chest with the expression you make.
“I do mean it. I’m glad I became your knight.” He wants to say ‘friend’ instead, but knows he shouldn’t.
Truth be told, he saw you in a different light than just the Princess since the night the two of you shared in the kitchen.
“Have I gone Mad?” You ask. “Am I the only one who doesn’t see you like that?”
It feels like Aki is free falling.
“Do you only see me as your Princess, Aki?”
He doesn’t know how to respond. He doesn’t know how to tell you that he's been in love with you since he saw you in your old nightgown with flour on your face.
Aki whispers your name like it might slow the situation down. The two of you shouldn’t be doing this. It will cause you so much trouble.
“Aki, I’m in love with you!”
It’s just the two of you in the room. Your words bounce of the walls. If Aki had any sense left in him he would worry that someone outside would have heard your confession. He doesn’t, though. He only cares about what you said because they’ve been on his mind for months.
He’s never been good with words, so he lets his body do the talking for him.
Aki reaches over, letting his hand rest on your cheek. He brings his lips to yours and kisses you so softly it almost feels like he hasn’t made contact. Your lips taste of tea, with a hint of salt. Maybe from dried tears. You’re stunned at first, remaining still before you push into him, deepening the kiss. It’s everything Aki has wanted. He communicates his feelings to you through the seam of his mouth.
I love you.
I don’t want anyone else but you.
I would rather die than see you jump off the ledge, or marry another.
Aki spoke of your greediness to himself, even though he wanted to drink it all up. But perhaps he was more greedy than any royal, more greedy than even you.
When he pulls back and opens his eyes he finds you staring at him. “Why did you do that?” You ask, surprise etched in your features.
“I love you.” He murmurs back to you.
I love you. I love you. I love you.
You begin to cry, reaching forward to grab at him. He slides into your bed beside you and holds you against his chest, even though he knows it must be uncomfortable.
“Aki, I cannot marry Prince Kurose or anyone else.”
“I know,” He wants you to be with him instead.
“What are we going to do?” Your sobs fill the room. “We should be together,” you whisper before pulling back to look up at him. “Aki, do you want to be with me?”
“Of course I do,” he says your name softly.
“Would you run away with me?” Your eyes are filled with hope at the new idea.
Do you know what you’re saying? It would damage the rest of your life. Aki would be a traitor and his head would be wanted by the entire kingdom, but that he does not care for. He only cares for the image of you in a small house with no warm water, and an uncomfortable bed.
He wants you to have the best of the best.
Except you aren’t happy here.
He isn’t sure what to do. He wants so badly to help you and save you from this situation.
Life outside could be treacherous.
No. He can make it work. He will make it work. He will work as hard as he must to provide for you.
“Are you sure you want that?” He questions, breathless as he looks at your sparkling eyes.
“I am.” You reply. “Run away with me.”
~~~
Aki says your name when he gets to your room, each letter lighter than the last. It’s nice, saying your name. It flows off his lips so easily he would swear that he was born to say it. Not because you were the Princess of his kingdom, but because you were his.
It’s been two days since the night you decided to leave the kingdom together. Once you made up your mind your entire demeanor changed. You smiled again, more talkative with all of your handmaidens. The doctor even said you might be ready to leave your room soon.
They had no idea.
“Are you ready?” He asks, his gut telling him to turn around to ensure no one was near by, but his brain telling him not to.
He doesn’t want to look. It would be safer to check, but if he doesn’t look then no one is there. It’s not how reality works, but Aki can hope.
A giddy smile plays on your lips, your eyes lighting up. There's that smile that Aki swore he would do anything for. There’s a ratty dress on your body, a little too short but it covers all the necessary areas. He also gifted you a thick jacket to keep you heated during the night. Aki had bought both from a castle worker who had no idea they were aiding in betrayal. He wanted you to be wearing something that wouldn’t stick out like a sore thumb, even though you truly ought to be wearing only the finest of clothes.
If the King were to find out what Aki planned to do, what the two of you planned to do, then he surely would have Aki’s head.
Nothing fun ever came without risks.
“Yes,” you carry nothing, Aki having told you it was better to pack lighter.
He carries several rations of food and drink, heavier on his back than any metal sword. His hand grips yours tight like he’ll lose you, even though there are torches lining the castle walls. The light dances off the two of you as you make your way into the night.
It wouldn't take the guards long to notice your absence. Aki was grateful that he knew all of their schedules, as it had greatly helped him in plotting your escape.
He hears a shuffling noise before you do, quickly yanking you back around a corner and sliding his hand over your mouth. Now he really felt like a criminal. There was no way he would risk either of you being seen.
Once the coast is clear he rushes forward, hand holding yours as he hugs the wall while making his way closer and closer to the exit. The two of you had mere minutes to do this. The plan was to slip out the back, cross over the field where you spent many hours together, and you would be free. You would have to exit the kingdom first, but once you left the field and entered into the streets neither of you would have to worry about weary eyes. The both of you would be long gone from the country before the guards even thought that you may have left the castle.
He’s looking out into the darkness, waiting to see if any torches pass by. It’s the shift change. Once he decides that it’s now or never, he holds your hand and runs out the castle, through the back door. The night is cold as it kisses Aki’s skin, perhaps to jolt him back to reality. Is he sure he wants to do this? Is he really sure he wants to do this? Once the two of you left there would be no turning back for him.
He’s never been so sure of anything in his life.
Somewhere along the way, between lush grass and whispered discussions Aki found himself deeply and irreparably in love with you. It didn’t matter that he was a knight who grew up on the streets, groomed for a life of hardship. It didn’t matter that you were a Princess, destined for a life of delicacy.
Perhaps it’s because of who you are that led the two of you to a life of love and betrayal. Not because you were wealthy and he was not, but because you taught Aki more things in the several months that he's known you than he learned his entire life. You taught him how to smile again, how to love again. He’s worth more than a life of revenge. He wants to be good for you.
It would be a more exciting tale had there been a guard who caught the two of you right as you were about to make your great escape. If guards pulled you apart from each other, where you would never see the other again.
That isn't what happened.
Instead, you and Aki are able to slip from the castle door, no one around to see your choice.
Aki’s heart is loud in his ears as the two of you travel further and further, past the field of green, not even a bird in sight.
“How are your feet?” Aki asks, looking at your side profile, your face mostly covered by the large hood you wore. He wanted to get a horse, he could not bare to see you walk the far distance he knew was ahead, but he didn’t want to draw too much attention.
“I’m okay,” he can tell you want to say his name but you don’t want to risk it while you’re still in the city, even though everyone is fast asleep in their beds. “We haven’t been walking that long.”
The shops surrounding you both are closed for the night, but Aki knows they will open up in several hours, with guards eventually walking through to warn them of the Princess’s status. All hands would be on deck, so the two of you really needed to make it out of the city before morning's first light.
On the edge of town there’s a family who raises horses for a living. You just need to make it there and it would be alright. Sure it would be a life on the run, but Aki trusted himself to be able to keep you out of the King's eye as long as you left the city.
The two of you are silent as you walk through the empty roads, knowing the kingdom isn't the largest by any means, but feeling as though the road ahead of you will never end. You keep a tight grip on Aki’s hand which calms his nerves a little, a way to show him that you want this.
His other hand keeps close contact with his sword should he need it, even though he really hoped he wouldn’t.
You finally reach your destination after an hour of walking. It’s a small house on a hill, the city looking tiny and faraway in the distance. Aki speaks in hushed tones as he exchanges a bag of gold coin for a large horse, one big enough for the two of you. Her coat is brown, and her hair is soft as silk.
Aki grins when he notices you patting her head, promising to give her an apple as soon as you’re able to get your hands on one.
You did it, you really did it.
“Are you ready?” Aki asks, his shoulders light now that the two of you have made it free.
“Of course.” You smile back.
He helps you mount the horse with ease before jumping up to get on himself. The man who sold him the horse was not able to get a good look at your face, thanks to your coat. Aki bids him farewell before taking the reins on the horse, letting her guide you both down the path away from the kingdom.
The dawn arrives, the sky’s colors muted as the horses' hooves clack against the road. It had been several hours since you escaped. Surely the guards were searching for you and Aki by now.
It doesn’t matter. It doesn’t matter because you made it. Even though you two were bound to face hardships going forward, Aki knows he will keep you safe and happy. He vowed to.
Aki has never broken a promise before, and he doesn’t plan on doing it now.
You ride off into the rest of your lives.
Tag List: @mikisspeak, @dinolvrrr, @sauki1, @reiluvr, @gothiccwhore666, @bunviixo, @slutshamethesquirrels
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Captain Hayakawa seemed to have it out for you, if the constant remarks and comments were any indicator. That was something you had come to terms with. What you hadn't expected was for something to shift between the two of you. Something dangerous.
Suddenly, the line between hate and passion had never been murkier.
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ᴺᴼᵂ ᴾᴸᴬᵞᴵᴺᴳ : 1/12/26
cw/tags: hayakawa aki/reader, aki hayakawa/reader, himeno, enemies to lovers, like aki is meannnn, slow burn, coworkers to lovers, asshole aki, explicit sexual content, drunk mishaps, including from himeno, sexual tension, resolved sexual tension, gratuitous smut, sex pollen, vaginal sex, reader lowkey has problems, dom/sub dynamics, semi-publix sex, rough sex, rough kissing, oral sex, everyone but them knows they're into eachother, just read itll be a good time, abuse of authority, nastyyyy smut, aki hayakawa is a freak, but so are you , BDSM, so much angst.
Fluff | Tension | Chainsaw Man AU | It’s hard to focus on the job when Aki is distracting.
Rain taps softly against the windshield, a steady rhythm that fills the quiet inside the car.
The city lights blur as the car moves past. Aki, sits with one hand steady on the wheel, the other resting loosely near the gear shift. Calm focus. Like he was built for this— controlled, quiet, precise.
You sit in the passenger seat. Silent, not moving much. The previous job took longer than expected.
But you have enough energy to look.
It starts small. A glance. Then another.
After a minute, you're studying him.
The way his fingers flex slightly when he turns the steering wheel. The faint tension in his forearm. The clean line of his jaw, sharp even in the dim glow of streetlights. His hair, slightly damp from the rain, falling just enough around his eyes to make him look... unfair.
You don't even realize how obvious it's gotten.
Until—
"You're staring."
His voice's flat, eyes still on the road... and you're too tired to look away.
"No, I'm not."
"You are."
"I'm observing."
Aki exhales quietly, like he's already tired of this conversation. But there's no bite to it.
"You're distracting."
"I know, right." You turn your body just slightly more toward him, chin resting on your hand. "But, you're driving just fine. Focused and all," you add teasingly.
Bold. Unapologetic.
"...That's not the point," He says quietly, if you weren't already looking at him, you would've missed it.
"Can't help it," you murmur, "You look good."
Silence. Not awkward. Just...full.
Aki's grip on the steering tightens for half a second. Barely noticeable. Active restrain.
He doesn't respond. Doesn't look at you. He keeps on driving. But there's a faint shift in his posture—more aware, more present.
The car slows as he pulls into a narrow parking spot near your destination.
Rain still falling. Wipers clicking.
The world feels smaller in the car.
He shifts into reverse, turning slightly in your direction. Then—
His arm lifts. Extends behind your seat, resting against the headrest.
Time stops. He's closer now. Much closer.
His shoulder shifts toward you, his chest angling slightly your way as he looks over his shoulder to back the car in.
The sleeves of his shirt pulls just enough. The subtle flex of muscle along his arm.
The buttons on his shirt look like they're holding on for dear life. He's been training a lot, and it shows. The motion of his body is effortless, unintentional.
Your brain?
Gone.
Your eyes flick down. Then up. Then back again.
"...Aki."
He doesn't answer right away. Focused on parking. "Hmm?"
You swallow. "You're doing that on purpose."
The car straightens perfectly into place.
He shifts it into park.
Then— he finally looks at you.
"...Doing what?"
You blink up at him, cheeks warm now, completely caught in his gaze.
"That." You gesture vaguely at... all of him.
The arm. The angle. The proximity. The effect. Magnetic.
Aki's gaze lingers on you for a second longer than usual.
Then—ever so slightly— his mouth tilts. Not a full smile. Just enough.
"...You're still staring."
You don't even try to deny it this time.
"...Can you blame me?"
Another pause.
Then—he leans just a fraction closer. Close enough that his voice drops without effort.
"...And you're always this distracting."
Your heart stumbles. His arm still behind your seat. Close. Still making your thoughts short-circuit.
Then he pulls back. Casual again. Like nothing happened.
"Come on," he says, reaching for the door. "We've got work."
You sit there for half a second longer. Processing. Recovering.
Then you open your door, stepping into the rain—but your mind is still inside the car. Still stuck on the way he moved. The way he looked at you with those midnight-colored eyes.
The worst part is that the reports will be hell to focus on.
But the best part?
Tomorrow, on another mission, you'll get to stare at him all over again.
♡ would feel so safe in his car. ♡
♡ love a man that flirts without even trying ➺ Masterlist♡
synopsis: you’re aki’s subordinate and partner. feelings are misconstrued on a drunken night out. you reconcile with aki after more drinks, and indulge the feelings you’re so ashamed of.
content: angst, hurt/comfort, slight smut with fem!bodied reader, makeout session w/ sloppy kissing, sooo much alcohol, reader is slightly insecure, miscommunication and…toji.
playlist: i like the way you kiss me by artemas, bathroom by montell fish, i was never there by the weeknd.
there were often times at work, where aki would lament the choices that had landed him there. everyone at work was an idiot, and if they weren’t a complete idiot, they weren’t far off. apart from you.
you weren’t at all an idiot and, crucially, didn’t get on aki’s every last nerve. you clicked with aki as soon as you started in public safety. you were cut from the same fabric.
you were all the things he admired in a colleague: impeccable, smart, dedicated. you already had a repertoire of devil kills on your application before starting, and for that reason he could trust you to get the job done. you were both capable and strong.
soon enough you were conciously deciding to take the same smoke breaks and grab each other coffee. after your first quarter, you had successfully committed aki’s coffee order to memory: black, with no sugar.
technically, he was your superior, and you were his subordinate, he was also older than you. you were always mindful of not crossing the line, even though his unruly top knot was fucking gorgeous and you’d already fallen in love with his half-assed smirks. you respected the position you were in, and ultimately, put your job before any of your trivial feelings.
you’d learned to survive thus far by compartmentalizing your feelings, you weren’t about to let a man ruin that, or get in the way of your goal.
that being said, it was comforting to know that you and aki were on the same page.
—
20:00pm.
aki took one last drag of his dying cigarette, and put it out. it had just turned 8pm, and you would surely be waiting for him. it was the night of your division’s bi-monthly gathering - this time at a local bar.
aki normally never bothered showing up, but a few months ago, you had successfully convinced him it was good for team morale. you would generally rendevous there, but this time aki had offered to walk there with you and agreed to meet with you outside his apartment at 8pm.
aki opened his front door to find you waiting outside for him. you looked freezing, just as he’d suspected. you were clutching a tiny purse infront of a thin dress that was completely impractical. your dress was small and black, embedded with gems. you looked nothing less than ethereal. aki cared deeply about his appearance and, like you, always kept himself tidy. he had changed out of his work suit into an identical suit for the evening, excluding the tie. you were unintentionally matching and the heat of this revelation made it’s way into aki’s pale cheeks.
“aren’t you cold?” he interrograted, already lighting up another cigarette in his mouth as he locked up. he always spoke with his cigarette in his mouth, he was always so nonchalant. that’s what you liked about aki, his indifference, it meant that he was easy to talk to, and share your secrets with. he rarely expressed any bias towards the things you said.
you shook your head, smiling at him. “just a bit, but it’s fine. the bar’s only a block away isn’t it?”
you snorted, “you know, if you’re worried about my hands freezing you can always hold them, aki.”
he rolled his eyes, skillfully feigning annoyance. aki was truly a liar. he loved it when you teased him and made jokes like that - they played into his fantasies. he would happily hold your hand, hell, he would carry you if you asked him nicely.
“don’t be ridiculous.” he said.
and that was that.
the sky overhead began to clear, revealling the universe. you watched the sky, walking aimlessly beside aki as you made your way to the bar with him, paying no attention to the racing cars, and even less attention to the pedestrains bustling around you. you wobbled on the kerb, nearly falling off.
aki opened the door for you once you’d arrived at the bar. it wasn’t out of character for him to treat you like that, like nothing below royalty, he even pulled a chair out for you as you went to sit down before naturally claiming the seat beside you. you wouldn’t have it any other way.
the bar was warm and dimly lit with candles. as you shrugged your coat off, aki couldn’t help but notice the different things you’d done with your makeup that night. your face looked dewy and shimmery, your lipgloss was glittery.
“what are you drinking?” he mumbled next to your ear, already sick of everybody else.
you hadn’t given it much thought yet. “um. maybe a lychee martini? i don’t know.”
the rest of the division were already engrossed in their own conversations. despite the numb chatter, it felt like the two of you were alone. you wouldn’t mind drinking alone with him, you thought, watching his thoughtful eyes.
“okay.” he nodded, and raised his hand to call a waiter over.
“i don’t know. i just want something sweet i think. decide for me?” you suggested, drawing circles on the menu infront of you with your painted nails.
to be honest, you hadn’t come along to drink, you had come to spend time with aki. he sat beside you, blasé, with his arm slung over the back of your chair, cool as ever. the air around him was confident, and heavy with the scent of his cologne, making it difficult for you to focus on anything else.
“you really think that’s a good idea? me deciding for you?” aki chuckled, “i’ll get you a lychee martini. that sounds sweet enough.”
you’d forgotten how quickly one drink could turn into five, soon enough you were slurring your words.
aki was always careful not to drink too much, incase you needed his help, and paced himself. also, he didn’t want to forget the time you’d spent together.
you laughed inbetween hiccups at a joke he’d made. he chuckled at you endearlingly, and steadied your hand as your 6th lychee martini sloshed around and threatened to spill over his lap.
“guys! guys!” you shouted, commanding the attention of your division. “did you know…that mister hayakawa here…” hiccup. “has never…ever…had a girlfriend!” hiccup.
the table errupted with giggles and aki scowled at you. “hillarious. now shut up.” he scolded, and teasingly confiscated your glass, dragging it over to his side of the table. he held the neck of the glass between his two fingers.
aki only bothered telling you that because you’d been prying. earlier that night, you’d asked him why he never brought any dates along, which is when he revealled that he’d never dated before - ever. he never had enough time, he lied, knowing all too well that he was simply holding out for the right person. aki would never admit it, but he believed in soulmates.
it wasn’t completely untrue that he struggled for time, his days would begin at 5am and finish at 10pm, sometimes later, 7 days a week.
he wouldn’t have time for a girlfriend, let alone dates and sex, these would always be things of little consequence to aki, unless it was you. he might’ve been able to find the time to spoil you, and take you to fancy restaurants. he’d move mountains for you, if you asked.
“hmph fuck you.” you whined, licking your lips and coating them with saliva.
you furrowed your eyebrows in confusion, not quite recalling your superior’s name, you were too tipsy for that. you reached for your glass and he dragged it away from grasp again, smirking at your deplorable attempt at a rebuttal.
“fuck me?” he lowered his voice and narrowed his darkening eyes at you. you narrowed your eyes back at him, and leaned forward, resting your chin in your palm. you watched him for a while and he watched you in return, pulse rising.
your eyes were drunk, pupils blown, mascara starting to smudge. aki thought about your dishevelled beauty, and how much he would’ve liked to taste your lips in that moment. his eyes feasted on you whilst, in his head, he mapped out routes to your soul.
truthfully, for as long as he could remember, aki saw you as his.
“aki?” you whispered softly, interrupting his racing train of thought.
“yeah?” aki’s heart started thumping. you watched his adam’s apple rise nervously in throat, albeit your eyesight was blurry.
“you’re staring at me.”
“am i?” he asked, bluntly.
aki cleared his throat.
—
12:09am.
through thick cigarette smoke, you blurted out “can i stay at yours tonight?” followed by, “shit…sorry, i shouldn’t that said that.”
why were you asking him that all of a sudden? were you tired? did you want something? did you mean platonically, or in the same bed? you were drunk, clearly, and didn’t know what you were saying, but he could hardly say no.
after it had taken aki more than 30 seconds to culminate a response, you slumped back against the railings with a defeated sigh. it was worth a shot, right?
“you don’t even need to bother asking to be honest, y/n.” he stated simply, staring up the sky.
you quickly perked up, leaning in for a smoke. aki’s pulse started racing again, he could smell the alcohol on your breath as you parted your lips for a tug on his cigarette.
“gimmie.”
your legs were wobbly and he instinctively opened his arms to catch you, but you managed to stay upright without them. his pale hands continued to hover over your waist as you hung onto the collar of his shirt. you were too cold and tired to give a damn, meanwhile the proximity of aki’s body kept you warm. you’d been close, even accidentally brushed hands before, but never this close. your heart fluttered, you could feel his muscly legs become entangled with your own.
“but you hate it when i smoke.” he mumbled, glancing down his nose at you.
“well i’ve changed my mind.” you retorted. you were being a brat.
with the little energy aki had left, he rolled his eyes at you, exhaling a cloud of smoke in your face. “no. let’s go home, get you some water.” he summarised, putting his cigarette out on the railings behind you. “if you smoke, you’ll regret it when you’re sober.”
you nodded and took aki’s arm without a second thought, trying not to stumble and disgrace yourself.
the walk home was giddy. you should have felt cold because you weren’t wearing a coat, but the alcohol kept you comfortably numb. you recognised aki’s subdued apartment, scarcely lit by street lamps, and groaned in utter relief as you approached the entrance. he supported you up the stairs, through the hallway, stopping patiently with you every time you needed to collect yourself.
“you okay?” he whispered, your noses practically touching. you could only manage a nod as the world outside aki’s apartment door spun crazily.
once you were inside, aki got down on one knee to relieve you from the tight heels you’d been wearing all night. once he’d losenend the straps, you kicked them off and they landed halfway across his kitchen. thud.
your concious thoughts began to drunkenly blur into one and you were fighting the urge to throw up.
aki needed to process what was happening so he let his hair down and dragged a hand through it to get rid of any knots. you were in his apartment, and you were going to be there when he woke up as well. he was stressed, you could tell, despite not being able to form a coherent stream of thought otherwise. you could see the tension in his brow and tight jaw.
he got up and flicked the kettle on to boil, his footsteps padding against the cold floor as he shuffled around in the dark, already making up the couch for you. making you comfortable was his priority, his hot drink would come second.
the only light in the apartment came from his bathroom door that was ajar, you realised he must’ve forgotten to turn the light out before leaving, which you found strange because he was usually meticulous. little did you know, he’d been too busy preening himself earlier in the evening.
you were still stood in the doorway, using the walls either side of you to stop yourself from falling face-first into the rug, growing increasingly impatient.
“aki. water…” you groaned, swallowing a burp that might’ve turned into something else.
“just be patient. maybe don’t get yourself so drunk next time.” he snapped.
“couldn’t help it.” you groaned again, ever louder this time, the left strap of your dress beginning to slip off your shoulder, revealling even more of your delicate skin.
aki stormed over with a glass of water and held it against your mouth. “you definitely could.” then pulled the strap of your dress back over your shoulder. he stared at you exhaustedly, compelling you to take a sip of the water infront of you.
“no…would’ve been too nervous otherwise...” you admitted, taking small sips.
you felt suddenly small, cowering between aki’s chest and the closed door behind you. you were almost half the size of him. this wasn’t supposed to feel so intimate, but it did. a blush crept up your chest, colouring in your cleavage, and your cheeks. with the little reserve aki had left, he fought the urge to stare down at your pretty tits.
you were so pretty. all night you’d been so silly and clumsy, it made his heart swell. aki gulped, the way your eyes glowed up at him from beneath your fluffy lashes made him feel hot and throb between his legs.
aki’d had sexual thoughts about you before, in fact, he often thought about you in the middle of the night, with his hard, dribbling dick in his hand, but the thoughts he had were purely the work of his lucid imagination. he could really see you now.
“nervous?” he breathed.
yes, nervous. you nearly shit yourself when you received aki’s text that morning, inviting you to meet at his apartment. it was a bold move, even for him. you were used to spending all of your time together at work, lunch was no exception, but this? it felt different, maybe even slightly unprofessional.
you quickly broke the heavy gaze between you and your superior, brushing past him and making a beeline for the couch.
aki was suddenly able to breathe again and he followed you, placing the glass of water on a coaster next to you.
“i’m going to get changed. please try not to puke anywhere.”
as he turned to leave for his room, you grabbed his wrist. aki’s heavy breathing resumed. he paused and thought seriously about his choices, and what he wanted, about how pretty you looked sat on the couch beneath him, and how badly he wanted to ruin you.
every fibre of his tortured being wanted to tear that sheer dress off your body and make you wet, but you were drunk, and that would be questionable.
“y/n. you’re drunk. stop it.” he shut you down, shrugging your hand off, and left you sat on his couch in a pool of shame.
this was for your own good, aki convinced himself, ignoring all of the horrible feelings that started to bubble within him. it physically pained him to shut the door on you and leave you alone in his dingy kitchen.
that night, you lay a healthy distance from aki’s bedroom, tucked beneath a spare duvet of his. the duvet, and his pillows, smelled familiar, a scent you had learned to recognise with your eyes closed. you had learned to detect him at work, using only your nose. a blue light, you assumed from his lamp, glowed from underneath his bedroom door. all night it gnawed on your mind how inviting that light seemed, and how nauseating it felt that aki didn’t fucking want you.
everything felt hopeless. all that hard work, all those months of winning his trust, and thinking you might have had him wrapped around your finger, had amounted to nothing. you knew aki was complicated, but you thought it would’ve been easier than that.
aki frowned on the other side of the door, pulling his pillow frustratedly over his ears. you cried quietly, muffling staggered breaths with his spare duvet.
“i’m a terrible person.” he thought aloud. it wasn’t a revelation, he already knew that he was a jerk and, despite having your best interests at heart, had managed to ruin you. he could have laughed at how ironic it sounded.
this would go down in history as, potentially, one of the worst days in aki’s adult life.
—
10:34am.
aki opened his bedroom door, doubtful that you would still be there, and scanned the room for signs of your presence. just as he’d expected, you’d already left, and his apartment was empty, not even the scent of you remained.
he squinted, the morning light crept in from the balcony and stung his eyes. you had folded up the spare duvet on his couch imperfectly before leaving, and the glass of water was still half empty.
aki didn’t regret the choices he made last night, he was protecting you if anything. he checked his phone for a shitty message from you, but there was nothing, and that was somehow worse. he chewed the inside of his cheek uncertainly, remembering how sweet you’d been, tugging him in between your legs, and inviting him into your heart with an alluring smile.
he felt the sudden urge to vomit and ran to the toilet, slamming his hand into the wall for support as he let it all out. he hadn’t had that much to drink the night before, so it must have been something else upsetting his stomach. maybe guilt was symptomatic, he thought. he’d never felt like this before.
aki continued to check his phone all morning, the anxiety beginning to cannibalise him. he guessed you’d deleted his number already, and that work was going to be extremely awkward on monday.
you’d gathered your belongings at 7am, and left in a futile attempt to get some sleep in your own bed, but it hadn’t worked. you eventually gave up, and decided to ride the day out with coffee.
you were so busy feeling sorry for yourself, that you hadn’t stopped to consider aki’s reasons for turning you down.
nevermind that, things wouldn’t have worked out anyway. this is what you told yourself. firstly, aki was a busy man, he never would’ve been able to make time for you outside of work. secondly, aki had never dated before, and his inexperience was a slight deterrent. thirdly, aki was complicated, he had a plethora of unresolved traumas, you figured it would be healthier not to bare the weight of those on top of your own.
despite telling yourself this, it didn’t make things any easier, save for potentially fucking someone else.
—
monday.
aki actively avoided you on the way into work on monday morning and, for the first time, showed up late. you felt his cold presence as he walked into the office. aki sunk his feelings that morning with a coffee and a cigarette before work, and you were determined to continue compartmentalizing yours, just as you’d always done.
you’d hoped to be subtle but everyone at work could feel the change and the increasing tension, especially on thursday when aki allowed his seamless character to break after denji kept goading him with insensitive questions.
“just shut the fuck up.” aki spurned, almost spat, scrunching up the ends of his papers, before storming out of the room. your heart sank to the bottom of your stomach and fell into irretrievable pieces.
after watching aki disappear for a smoke, your eyes settled on the paper infront of you. you held next week’s schedule in your trembling hands.
“what the hell was that about.” denji snorted.
“not sure.” you dismissed quietly, noticing that aki would no longer be your patrol partner. you had been pencilled in to patrol with denji instead. you looked down so that no one would notice the tears gathering at the corners of your eyes.
you were no longer in the picture, you realised. you lied to yourself every day after that, persuading your heart that it was possible to co-exist as strangers.
denji’s eyes softened when he noticed your unsteady hands.
“y/n, don’t stress it. you know i won’t let us get killed.” denji leaned forward, in an attempt to intercept your thoughts, as if that was your only concern - you wished that was your only concern.
“i’ll bare that in mind.” you laughed, without smiling, and stood up to take your break.
you would have died for a coffee, if it came to it, because you hadn’t slept all week. you missed your friend and you were sad, although it was favourable that your favourite café was so busy that morning. your lonely thoughts would become distrupted by the crowd’s chatter and for a brief amount of time, you would find yourself distracted by the smell of coffee and cake.
you wondered lifelessly through the door, recalling all the times aki had stopped you from falling off the kerb along the way, offered to take your heavy bag or stomped his cigarettes out on the pavement outside.
you wouldn’t normally give the barista your order, because she’d conveniently memorized it, but that morning you could have cried.
you’d unconciously paid for two coffees instead of one, and realised when it was too late, as she handed you an iced vanilla latté and an americano: black, with no sugar.
“thank you.” you croaked weakly and carried the drinks back to the office, hoping that you and aki wouldn’t cross paths - indefinitely.
—
saturday.
the best way to alleviate your pain would be by drinking, you thought. in hindsight, it wasn’t the worst idea. you made yourself look effortlessly sexy, it genuinely didn’t take much.
you glanced one final time in the mirror before leaving your apartment. tonight you would let yourself become unravelled and forget the past week. you would saturate your feelings with alcohol and find a stranger to spend the night with. you hoped to project all of your anger onto that stranger, so the week that ensued wouldn’t hurt so much.
everything was alright to begin with; the club you’d chosen was the perfect combination of cosy and tireless. the dj played songs behind a tacky smoke machine, silencing the hum of adolescent voices, underaged teenagers and over-aged mothers.
you threw back a shot of sour apple vodka, hissing. you felt ridiculous drinking alone, hopefully one of the dilfs in the bar would find you mysterious and agree to take you home, fuck you, if you were lucky.
you circled the rim of another shotglass, fingers glistening with diamond rings, when you felt a hand on your arm.
“what are you doin’ drinking here alone, sweetness?” a hot voice rasped against your neck, “need some company?”
“sure.” you welcomed the stranger’s company, patting the bar stool beside you without looking at him first.
you inferred that he was much older than you, and probably came from a difficult line of work. based on the calloused pair of hands that lay on the bar beside you, it was probably something physical, and demanding, which is why he sounded so tired and in desperate need of a drink. the arm in your peripheral was thick and muscular, not something you were used to, particularly the force of it curling around your delicate waist. you gasped softly.
“the name’s toji, by the way. fushiguro.” you didn’t care for introductions, and nodded, skulling another shot before ordering two more: one for you and one for your new friend.
he could sense that you weren’t willing to co-operate, not easily at least, and smirked. toji didn’t mind, he was used to girls that played hard-to-get, they were all just as sad and easy in the end.
“i reckon that it’ll only take two more of those things,” he gestured to your shot glass, “to get you talking.”
“bet.” you sighed, your head already beginning to feel fuzzy.
you didn’t trust your new friend, you didn’t trust anyone, but especially not him. no one felt like home apart from aki.
aki.
your heart did ‘the sinking thing’ again, and left a sour taste behind in your mouth, causing you to inadvertently frown at your drink.
“somethin’ bothering you?” toji questioned, downing a shot of his own, before ordering something stronger. he struck you as the type to drink heavily and wake up with no regrets because he was certainly big enough to handle it.
“yeah. a friend. ex-friend actually.” you replied. toji’s eyes raked down your body whilst you spoke to the tumbler in your hand.
“ah, there we go. so she does have a tongue in her head.” he teased in a ragged voice, which lead you to face him. you confirmed your suspicions by inspecting his face; he was indeed older, with a scar on the corner of his smirking mouth. he was the type you would happily fuck, but not trust.
to say that you had low expectations was an understatement, you didn’t have any at all. men like this were unpredictable, you would need to switch your emotions off if things were going to work according to plan.
“did he toy with your heart or somethin’?” he asked.
“not even. i was just - nevermind.” you shrugged.
“what did you do?” toji continued intuitively, swirling the drink around in his glass.
“stupidly thought my feelings were reciprocated.” you laughed bitterly. you had intended to forget about him, to dance the night away, but your feelings for aki were inescapable.
“god, all you females are the same.”
you were under the impression that your plan was failing already. every time you looked at toji, you were expecting to see aki smiling back at you, haunted by the nostalgia of drinking together last weekend. you sighed angrily, slamming your glass down on the bar next to you. “excuse me.”
you stumbled quickly to the bathroom, not realising how drunk you were until you stood up and tried walking. you pushed impatiently through the crowd, muttering expletives to yourself.
you locked yourself in a bathroom stall and sat on the toilet. you didn’t need to use the bathroom, you just needed space to breathe.
normally you’d be sending aki memes at this hour, or complaining about having to go into work on monday via text, too shy to ever call him. it was routine that aki would deprive himself of sleep just to talk to you, and hear about your day, now he had to wait for any sign of life from his phone.
you pulled your phone out of pocket and stared longingly at it, at the wallpaper of you and aki. he wasn’t smiling because you’d unexpectedly shoved the camera in his face for a selfie on your first day as partners. you leaned against the wall beside you. you wouldn’t need to dial his number…you had him saved in your phone…
fuck it.
aki rolled over with wide eyes as his phone buzzed on the table. he already knew it was you calling because he didn’t have a social life. he’d never answered the phone so quickly before in his life, he hadn’t even had time to rehearse an apology.
“i-“ he started.
“shurrup.” you slurred in a small voice. hearing him breathe was enough, you’d still be satisfied if he hung up after that.
“y/n. what the fuck. are you drunk?” he snapped down the phone. he wasn’t mad at you, he was just concerned, and had a terrible way of showing it.
“maybe…” you nearly giggled, your phone sticking to the makeup on your face.
“i’m coming to pick you up.” aki stated, already reaching for his trench coat. “fun’s over.”
“no you’re not.” you testified, shouting so that you could nearly be heard over the music in the bar.
aki bit his cheek. you were being difficult on purpose, but to his relief he could tell you weren’t nearly as drunk as last weekend. “tell me where you are.”
“rudi’s.” you blurted, hanging up the phone immediately. “shit.”
“stupid girl.” he laughed shortly, getting into his car.
rudi’s was a bar in the heart of the city. aki tapped his foot impatiently at every set of traffic lights, clicking his tongue. he dared to think what you might be up to, or what you’d already done in the 20 minutes it took him to get to you. he sought you desperately in the crowd, swearing under his breath at every person that stood in his way.
it relieved him to eventually find you at the bar intact. he grabbed you by the wrist, spinning you into his chest.
“home time.”
“no.”
“yes.”
“no?”
“shut up.”
aki’s hand cupped the back of your nape and brought you in close. you searched his eyes for answers, to try and understand why things had happened this way, but you couldn’t find them, you couldn’t bypass the guilt in them.
you gulped, feeling toji’s eyes on you, boring a hole into the back of your head, as your hands rested upon aki’s collarbone. he looked dog-tired.
all you could come up with was, “don’t tell me to shut up.”
aki could have cracked a smile, but decided against it and leaned down into your neck, whispering, “care to explain why the guy behind you is staring at us?”
“just get us out of here, will you.” you mumbled, fiddling nervously with the buttons on his long jacket.
aki didn’t waste any time escorting you outside; dragging you away from your new friend and your abandonned drink. he threw you into the passenger seat of his car, and slammed the door shut behind him as he slid in next to you.
“you have some serious explaining to do, y/n.”
“likewise.” you replied. aki observed your broken eyes.
“i can’t explain it.” he started, squeezing the steering wheel infront of him. “i guess i didn’t want you to think badly of me.”
“think badly of you?” you asked, suddenly confused.
“for taking advantage of you.”
“oh.”
you watched the man infront of you, mesmerised, your mouth forming the shape of a surprised ‘o’. he chuckled at your reaction. you’d missed that warm sound, it made you feel so giddy. you tried pulling your eyes away from him, but you weren’t able to resist his jaded looks.
“aki?”
“hm?” he hummed, and met your gaze with a matched intensity.
you licked your lips, wetting them, preparing for a kiss. aki glanced down at them.
in a voice that was barely above a whisper, he asked, “want me to kiss you, y/n?” and held you gently by the chin. he coaxed you in, contemplating your lips with his cold eyes.
he knew exactly what you wanted and the way you wanted it. he’d listened to you when you told him what you were looking for in a lover, during a work night out. you wanted a dominant man, a boyfriend like a dad, someone to make you weak.
“i’d do anything for you to forigve me.”
aki caved and sighed before kissing your open mouth. your heart erupted, and you let him blindly guide your hands around his neck. this would remain a well-kept secret between colleagues.
he slowly kissed you, swallowing your pretty moans, and licked your tongue each time before pulling back, only to lean back in and repeatedly do the same. he consoled you with his warm tongue, simultaneously exploring your waist with his hands and brazenly reaching up to squeeze your tits.
you kissed him back sloppily, noisily, moaning underneath big hands. the butterflies he gave you were so intense that you felt sick. you felt his hungry eyes all over your body, scalding you - you were on fire.
“is this what you wanted?” he purred against your ear, before dragging his mouth over your neck and smothering it some more with hot kisses. you whined.
“well?” aki teased in a soft voice, kneading your big tits, watching them bounce around in your dress. he wanted nothing more than to rip it open, and get on top of you, in all the animalistic ways he’d imagined, meanwhile he watched your nipples harden underneath your dress.
he repeatedly silenced you by pecking your mouth, muffling your voice each time you tried to answer his question.
you whined, squeezing your thighs together. it was overwhelming - he was overwhelming.
“aki…” you began, pushing him back using the little strength you had left, so that he was at arm’s length.
“i’m sorry about last weekend.” he admitted quickly, tucking a lose strand of hair back behind your ear. his lips were red and swollen.
“it’s okay. i’m just confused. i thought i’d misread things, but now you’re saying you wanted this after all?”
he removed his hands from your chest, and studied your changing expression, predicting that you would soon start blushing. he loved it when you blushed in front of him, proudly showcasing your vulnerability.
“yes.” he said plainly, panting, still catching his breath.
