#dad pun

[haley-harrison]

Did you know that the Bible doesn't mention what Noah's wife was called?

So I guess you could say we have Noah-dea. 😆

[wellthebardsdead]

Cole: I’ve been meaning to tell ya this for a while but you always disappear before I can. You got pair of great tits.

Hanzo: *holding two great tits* th-thank you.

[livelovecaliforniadreams]

Pam and Jim have a talking head where they explain that they have found a very highly rated local daycare. It's very hard to get into. So they have to go in for an interview. Yeah. And I think Jim has his first dad pun where he says, if not, there's always the army, the infantry.  He's so ready to be a dad. Dad pun!  Way to go. Well, there was an alt Jim/ Pam talking head that was in the shooting draft. It was a must shoot. I have to read it to you. It made me laugh. OK, Pam says. We found a great local daycare, but it's really hard to get into. Jim says, Ideally, we would have called the moment we conceived. Pam says, But usually you fall right asleep. Whoa. OK. Some TMI there. About Jim and Pam.  I know. That was a must shoot. So you shot that. It exists somewhere. -Angela & Jenna 

[chaotic-benji]

The Bee Movie Be Like:

BEEstality

That's it that's the joke.

[spacegayparty]

Patton : so how is working at a graveyard?

Remus, shrugging : it's dead most of the time

Patton, chuckling : wow, you must have been dying to make that joke!

[moreterrypratchett]

"Oh," he said, and added with sudden certainty, "you’re Death, right?" YES. I AM SORRY THAT I AM LATE. The spirit formerly known as Shoblong looked down at the pile of dust that represented his worldly habitation for the previous 600 years. "So am I," he said. He nudged death in the ribs. EXCUSE ME? "I said ’I’m sorry I’m late.’ Badabing-badaboom." I BEG YOUR PARDON? "Er… you know…sorry I’m late. Like…dead?" Death nodded. OH, I SEE. IT WAS THE BADABING-BADABOOM I DID NOT UNDERSTAND. "Er... it was to show it was a joke," said Shoblang. AH, YES. I CAN SEE HOW THAT WOULD BE NECESSARY. IN FACT, MR. SHOBLANG, WHILE YOU ARE LATE, YOU ARE ALSO EARLY. BADABING-BADABOOM. "Pardon?" YOU HAVE DIED BEFORE YOUR TIME.

Terry Pratchett, Thief of Time

[katalinathecat]

My dad just made the ultimate dad joke

I was foldimg laundrey, and my dad was just leaving to visit the hospital. I had just folded the last thing, and there was a few one dollar bills at the bottom of the basket, crunched together. I grabbed it and ran to the window juat as my dad was walking to the car, and shouted "hey, check it out!" And held the crumpled bills up to the window. He then paused, and yelled back

"NOWW THATS WHAT I CALL LAUNDERING MONEY!"

And then walked to the car and drove off.

I am in awe of his might.

[watermelon-daddhy-blog]

Love at first pun~