Do you ever just feel… disconnected? I thought it was burnout at first, but now I’m not so sure. I just really miss feeling excited about things.

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Do you ever just feel… disconnected? I thought it was burnout at first, but now I’m not so sure. I just really miss feeling excited about things.
I’m fed up of searching for the missing piece of the puzzle that is my life
my last diary/journal entry is from march 19th, i might be cooked
there is a house inside of me.
it was designed and built by pain
and i am looking for ways to demolish it.
it is neither safe to live in nor valuable to me. it only harbours old feelings that i'm ready to let go of.
this house was never meant to exist for as long as it did.
feeling sick + depression = feeling emotionally dead inside rn. in a numb bubble. i wanna sleep for days or curl up under the shower for a while or just stare at the wall and stop thinking. questioning my whole existence. hate myself. hate everything. hate myself. hate myself. what’s the point. that’s the mood. that’s the vibe. that’s what we are doing today. that’s how we are hanging by that thread, plowing along and pretending everything is fine while listlessly eating a reese’s pb pumpkin and not knowing if i am even gonna post this but ya know it’s cathartic and this is the shit I never tell anyone so fuck it ya’ll can suffer with me or most likely scroll past cause everyone got their own problems. Alexa play Bad Day by Daniel Powter
see ya’ll tomorrow as I slap on my hap hap happy face again!!! 😘
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